Disclaimer: Not, never, by no means, in no way or measure mine.


The Boy Who Cried Vampire.

There was no car in the drive way and all the lights in the house were off. Perfect. Dudley Dursley made his way up the walkway to the front door.

It was amazing how many people left their houses unlocked when they left home; it was only the third house he had tried tonight and the door swung open at his touch.

A grinning Dudley stepped over the threshold; the cat flap at the bottom of the door did not escape his notice. At least he hoped it was a cat. He had a good amount of experience with bad tempered dogs from dealing with his Aunt's precious pooches and he was not looking forward to adding to that experience.

Closing the door and flipping on the lights, Dudley looked around for a sign of the resident animal. Sure enough a pair of dishes lay on the floor of the kitchen only a few steps away from where Dudley stood. They were small and half full of food and water. Definitely a cat, Dudley decided with a smirk.

This would be all too easy, Dudley thought as he left his spot by the door and began looking for something to steal.

Now, Dudley Dursley was a rather spoiled child and had no need to steal anything. His parents bought him anything he asked for and often times did not even wait for him to ask. Of course it had as much to do with showing his unwanted burden of a cousin just how far at the bottom his cousin stood on the family totem pole as it had to do with making Dudley happy, but that just made the boy even happier to have a face to rub his good fortune in.

The problem was that always getting what he wanted was getting old, there was no excitement in the ask and receive method, and one could only play video games so many hours before even that got boring.

No, Dudley wanted a challenge. So he started to steal. Nothing much, and never anything expensive. He broke into a house and just grabbed a token item to prove that he indeed had done what he claimed.

Piers and the rest of his gang would have a party every time Dudley had made a successful break in. Lately his success had been celebrated nearly every night.

That was why he was here tonight, but as Dudley looked around he could not help but notice the complete lack of small objects that he could safely take without the owner of the house noticing.

The house he was in looked almost like it had come off a page of one of the decorating magazines that his mother was so enamored with. Everything was glowing with a sense of newness, and nothing, not one carpet fiber was out of place. Well, with the exception of where Dudley himself had walked. Shaking off the strange feeling, Dudley stepped into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator to grab something to drink while he was looking around.

Except for a few items that thankfully included what appeared to be a bottle of some unknown brand of beer, the fridge was empty.

Dudley looked away from the fridge, his heart racing. He could have sworn that he saw something moving out of the corner of his eye. A cat. Dudley laughed and grabbed the beer out of the fridge letting the door swing closed on its own.

"Does your owner know how bad you are at being a watch cat? Rather pathetic actually, but then again, black cats always were considered bad luck...if one actually ever bought into that." He jeered at the cat as his heart slowed back down to normal. "Listen to me, talking to a bloody cat, get out of here!" Dudley kicked at the animal as he addressed it and was amused when the cat jumped away nimbly avoiding his foot.

"Smart animal, already know not to mess with a Dursley." The thief smirked and twisted the cap off of the bottle. Dudley balked slightly at the bubbly, buttery taste of the drink in his hand that he was quite certain and rather disappointed that it did not have a drop of alcohol in it.

Ah well, it was still quite good even if it did not exactly have a normal flavor like the drinks he was used to.

Now, down to business. Dudley needed something to prove he had been there, something small like a personal CD player. He had quite a collection of those. The living room was empty aside from the white carpet, a couple easy chairs, and a wide screen plasma TV. Not exactly easy pickings.

From the living room Dudley made his way into what must have been the office. Dudley flipped on the light and looked around completely confused. The office had the standard equipment in it; wooden desks, computer, printer, office chair, the works. What made it so strange was that there was not a stray piece of paper anywhere. It was as if the room was never even used, rather like what he had seen of the rest of the house.

Dudley began opening desk drawers. Empty, empty, unopened package of printer paper, empty. He slammed the last drawer in frustration.

Dudley left the office and picked up the pace of his exploration. He had no idea when the occupant of the house would return, and even though he would never admit it to anyone he was beginning to get just a little freaked out. Nobody's home was this unlived in. Nobody lived without some little gadgets or figurines to decorate their home, something small and easily removable.

Dudley cursed as he entered a bedroom just as neat and empty as the rest of the house. Except for the dresser, there was an ornately carved box sitting on the top of the dresser. Finally, something interesting.

Dudley stepped over to the dresser, set his drink on the top, and lifted the box up from its location. It was strangely heavy for its size. Dudley eagerly lifted the lid and gasped in surprise when the contents were uncovered. Gold, real...it had to be. It was like doubloons, pirate treasure. There had to be at least a hundred coins inside.

If Dudley had the intellect to notice the size of the coins in relation to the dimension of the box he would have thought it quite odd how so many of the rather large coins could fit into the small box. As it was his eyes just widened as he thought of the wealth that just a few of the coins would bring him. Surely the owner of the house would not miss just ten of the coins, at least not for a few weeks. By then, Dudley would have traded them away on E-bay or found a way to pawn them off.

Greedily Dudley stuffed the coins into his pockets and picked his drink back up taking a swig. No sense in leaving evidence behind. His gang and he would be celebrating with a lot more than cheap beer tonight.

For it being his first time stealing something of actual worth, Dudley did not feel the least bit remorseful over depriving the home owner of his treasure. It obviously was not well protected, Dudley was just teaching the idiot a lesson. In fact, if you look at it right, Dudley was being generous. He had not taken much of the gold, less than ten percent. Yes, he had been rather magnanimous.

Feeling rather proud of himself, Dudley all but skipped to the front door only to find it would not open when he turned the handle.

As Dudley answered all his problems, he quickly applied more force as he yanked at the handle. Of course all this effort was to no avail.

"Just where do you think you're going" A voice hissed at him.

Dudley looked around, but there was nobody around. In fact there was not a living creature in this magazine picture perfect house except the black cat which was currently staring straight through Dudley with its coal black eyes.

"Scat Cat!" Dudley said, kicking out at the feline again. As before, the animal avoided the blow effortlessly. However this time when Dudley brought his foot back to him, his leg bore five deep red scratches from claws that had easily ripped straight through his trousers to communicate the animal's annoyance.

Dudley yelled in pain and anger. "You stupid animal! You should be put down."

The animal just watched the boy, looking as smug as a cat possibly could.

"Crap" Dudley said dropping his half empty bottle as he began fiddling with the locks on the door while intermittently jiggling the door handle. It remained resolutely closed.

"Thief, you are in possession of that which does not belong to you, your departure shall not be successful." The voice said, anger coating the slowly amplified tone.

He knew he heard something that time, but the boy still could not see anyone around him.

"Who is it? Who's there? Show yourself or you will regret it, I promise you! Come out of hiding and face me you coward!" Dudley said masking his discomfort with threats.

The cat just stared at him, black eyes unblinking. Dudley froze, unconsciously dropping his hands to hang limply to his sides.

"Not possible, not bloody possible. I must be out of my freakin' mind." This was something Potter would come up with, a talking cat. It went right up there with flying motorcycles and jumping up onto the roof. Oh he would pay for this, filling Dudley's head with his freakish ways.

As it was, the only thing to take his anger out on right now was the cat, the disturbingly uncat-like feline that had yet to take its eyes off of the boy.

Dudley's gaze grew murderous, the door was locked and he was losing his mind to a cat that did not know how to take a hint.

"You actually have the audacity to enter my abode, raid my provisions, wander my halls, and burglarize my bedroom." The animal seemed to grow, and yet it did not seem so much like an animal any more. It seemed to almost unfold and before Dudley knew it he was looking up into those very same coal black eyes, only this time they did not belong to a cat. "And further" The man's voice lowered dangerously. "You attempt to coerce me by means of your pitiful intimidation? I would label you an imbecile, thief, would it not be giving you too much credit."

Dudley stared at the cat...or as he was now, the man...unable to utter a sound. The man's lip curled in an expression of deep disgust and utter loathing. The expression itself was enough to send Dudley running in a blind panic, but what was revealed from the lifted lip grounded him in sheer terror.

The gleaming canines were abnormally long, and appeared to be very sharp. That added to the black eyes, the pale skin, and the long black robe that seemed to flow around the man even while he was standing still...well even to one as obtuse as Dudley there was no other answer for it.

The man was a vampire.

"I...I...I...But you..." Dudley said intelligently.

My, aren't we the articulate one this evening" The vampire slowly stepped towards the boy.

It was this leisurely advancement that finally spurred the boy into movement. He bolted, actually running towards and then past the creature confronting him. He ran down the hallway, and ran further before it hit him that he should have run out of hallway long ago.

Daring to stop and look around, Dudley found that he did not recognize where he had ended up. But, that was impossible, he had explored every inch of this small house. It was almost as if he was in a different house entirely

It was so big; it must have been a mansion. There was just no other word that would fit it. The hallway he was in seemed to go on forever, and there were doors spaces out on both walls for the expanse of the hall.

So what would happen if he did find a way out now? Was he even still in the same city? Country? He had to have been brought to a different location somehow; houses just did not shift their shape. Than again...neither did cats. He was so screwed. Would Piers and the rest of the gang come looking for him? They probably would just start drinking the beer and joking about possible scenarios that could have caused his delay.

That, after all is exactly what he would have done if he were in their place.

A door ahead of him opened. Dudley stumbled back as the robed man stepped out into the hallway only a few paces ahead of the boy.

"Did you honestly perceive that you could elude me in my own manor? How sanguine of you. Permit me to rectify that erroneous notion. Anywhere you conceal yourself, I will quite easily ascertain your location. Whatever protection you imagine you hold against me, I shall effortlessly shred it. It would be rather ill advised of you to even contemplate further incurring my displeasure." The man seemed to purr, his voice low and steady.

Despite the boy not understanding at least a quarter of what was said he quite easily read the threat in the man's tone, furthermore it was apparent even to him that running was useless. He was lost, and it was quite obvious that the vampire knew his way around the...what did he call it...manor.

Even with all the facts laid out before him Dudley refused to go down without a fight, but then again no one had ever accused the boy of rational thought. When the boy threw himself at the vampire it became apparent why.

"Idiot!" Dudley froze mid pounce and suddenly found himself flung against the wall and trapped there, his feet not touching the ground. Dudley's eyes widened in fear as he watched the man approach him, a stick held out in front of him pointed strait at Dudley. The boy struggled to no avail, he fear turning into terror as he realized that even with all of his strength, he could not even touch the man let alone fight him.

"Do you possess even an ounce of intellect or are you truly as brainless as you appear" The vampire bared his teeth at the boy causing him to further attempt to escape from his invisible bonds.

"Return what you have stolen, thief and perhaps I shall be lenient and deliver you a quick and relatively painless death, all this chasing has cause me to become quite parched." The man sneered.

With a flick of the stick Dudley Dursley found himself flung unceremoniously to the floor, ten feet away.

Scrambling to his feet, the boy began to run again.

Behind him he heard as the man commented, "So the hunt is on then," almost as if he was commenting on the price of tea.

The man was going to eat him, oh god, that man was a vampire and he was going to kill Dudley. The boy tried to go over the conversation in his head...Idiot...Death...Thief...Stolen...Return. Stolen! Return! The gold! In his terror he had forgotten all about the gold.

As if the gold was suddenly burning him through his pockets, Dudley reached in and pulled out the accursed metal. Without even glancing down at the coins in his hand, he flung them back behind him and picked up speed. He was wheezing, his breath coming out in short gasps due to his normal lack of exercise.

And suddenly he found himself to be in a bedroom. It was a very familiar bedroom. Oh god, he knew where he was.

Dudley ran from the room, down the short hallway, through the living room, past the kitchen and found himself once again at the front door. With a quick glance behind him the boy grabbed the handle and pushed hard, only to stumble out of the house as the door opened to his touch.

He was free, and the police were here! He was saved, he had to tell them. No one was safe!

"Vampire! There is a vampire in there, he...it tried to kill me." The boy cried as he staggered out to meet the uniformed men.

"Stop, put your hands in the air" One of the officers called out.

"What? No! Vampire, inside! I...It will kill us all!" Dudley rambled trying to make the police understand as one of them yanked his arms behind him and cuffing him on the spot.

"The boy seems a trifle deranged. I thank you officers for your quick reply to my call, when I saw the lights on inside, I was afraid of what I would find. It has been some weeks since I have been home," stated an ancient looking man with a long white beard and a pair of thin spectacles.

"No, you have to believe me, there is a vampire in there!" Dudley cried out, speaking to the old man just as much as to the cops. "Hungry...It will kill you!"

"Nonsense, my boy, there is nothing inside except my cat and a few belongings. But no, my cat seems to have gotten out." The white haired man bent down to pick up the animal rubbing up against his legs.

"You're in on it too! That's it, don't you see? The cat is the vampire; you have got to kill it. It made the house grow, it tried to eat me...it's a monster!" Dudley rambled frantically as he found himself being maneuvered into the back of a police car. "No! You have got to believe me!"

"Severus, you seemed to have made a name for yourself" The man said to the cat, a twinkle in his eyes. "Thanks again officers, it is nice to know that there is someone to call who can come to an old man's aid so swiftly. If you have no more need of me, I would like to attend to my cat. From the looks of things, he had a bit of excitement today. Isn't that right Severus?"

One of the policemen sighed. "We do have to check the premises sir, procedure."

"Oh, absolutely. Please, in fact, thank you. Can never be too safe, what with how violent teenagers can be nowadays, take all the time you need. Severus will just have to be patient.

Dudley watched as a couple officers entered the house while another questioned the old man and filled out the answers on a pad of paper. Cautiously the boy looked at the cat resting contentedly in the man's arms and their eyes met. Dudley scooted back in the seat but could not manage to force himself to break eye contact.

He felt the vampire's presence in his mind and he knew, just knew the vampire would be watching him. Somehow he knew that should he ever attempt to break into another house the man would know, and the next time he would not get off so easily. Those eyes watched him as the officer entered the car, followed as the car slowly drove away, and Dudley knew that they would follow him all the way into his nightmares.