He was smiling…
He was smiling…
I thought the happiest day of my life, SMILING, would have been the day I finally wrenched the life out of that bastard's body. He was smiling… The day that the tortured souls of my clan could be laid to rest, He was… The day that all my pain, he… all my sacrifices, he…, would finally had worth!
And the fucker was smiling…
So many years have past since that day, smiling…, yet I can still feel the warm stickiness of his blood on my hands, the feel of his body finally turning cold. He…smiling! My thoughts always reflect on the quickness of the killing strike. The ease of my kunai as it tore and ripped through his abdomen, spilling his insides. He was still smiling… He said something, but I didn't give a fuck for his words, I just kept cutting. I can smile? Then I watched every second as the life was fleeing from his eyes. Then I heard a sound so terrible, so horrid that its very presence felt like it was grating against my soul.
He was laughing!
My highest, proudest moment… The single defining event that ended a life consumed with loneness and pain… And the fucker was laughing!!!!!
A roar that was consumed with rage erupted from me; my kunai went to work again. I didn't stop this time. I couldn't stop till I was sure…I continued for several minutes, till his body laid real still. I took pleasure in my gruesome work; he wouldn't mock me this time.
Then my whole body froze, as I saw his face. His death mask, a content smile forever engraved on his face. His last words finally registering in my head, "My shadow…My creation…My legacy…My masterpiece…"
Fucking shit asshole! I beat you! I fucking won! I finally gutted and bled you like a dog and you were smiling!
I HATE YOU!!!!!
I get jolted awake from lasting image of the screaming that was going off in my head. "Fuckin' dreams…" I muttered hoarsely to myself as I got up from the bed. My gaze drifts around the dark room. I blink back several times, because I reasoned, the world shouldn't be spinning like that. A dull ache blaring in the back of my skull like something was desperately trying claw its way out.
It knew what it was. It was the memories…
They were always there, eating away at me, reminding me of my fuck-ups and failures. I wasn't fast enough. I wasn't strong enough. I wasn't the best. And I lost everyone because of it. But no, I got better. I got stronger. I severed and cleaved everything in my path till I was number one. And then I even fuckin killed him! But here's the kicker, I was still second best, and now he's laughing at me still in the grave, "His masterpiece…" his final words to me.
"I need a drink…" My voice carries out into the empty room. And through the scattered bottles of sake littered on about I realize; I woke up alone this time. "Sakura…" I muttered, through dry cracked lips. I needed some more, because I realized there was a way to beat back the demon inside of my head. There was a retreat, but only as long as I had a fucking drink. "Sakura…" I called more sternly.
They were always the same, the dreams. I was there that very last moment when I made that final glorious cut, followed by his death gaze. The condescending look in his eyes as life left him. How can you do that? How can you look down on someone when you're the one bleeding over the fuckin' ground?
Everyone keeps telling me, that they know how I feel. That it will pass. What the fuck do they know! The bastard's dead and its still haven't ended. Not for me. Not for me!
Kakashi, Sakura, even Naruto…
Naruto… At one point I thought we were a like him and I. We both know the darkness of solitude. Out of everyone, he knows about the dull aching pain that loneliness can rip inside of you right to the core. To know that despite all the bull shit Konoha and its Hokage can spout, that the only one you can really count on is yourself.
Yeah out of everyone, only Naruto probably knows this best of all, which are why he's better then the rest of them. That's why at one time he might have been my friend, maybe even my brother…
But although he knows the depths of loneliness, there is still one thing that separates us. He's never had anything to lose…
He's never had a mother or a father. He's never been held when before he had to go to bed. Or the elated feelings from receiving an approving look from your father's eyes. He knows nothing of these things. In a way, I'm envious of him. Since he's never had these things, he doesn't feel the agony of when they were wrenched from you. And it makes him just the same as the rest. Weak…
"SAKURA!" I shouted for the third time. Where the fuck was she? She should have been here.
And her, I tolerated it, her, for so long. But she has the same eyes. The same pitying, fucking mocking eyes… Full of the same bull shit, lies like the rest of them. I can deal with it on most days, but other days…
So what if she screams… So what if she hurts... Or that if it's me that its source… The pain she feels can't compare to the writhing emptiness within me.
I've stopped calling for her by now, because I realized she was gone… The images of a few nights ago start to drift in. I shrug as the recollection sets in as well as the reflections of my actions. I then go to throw on some clothes. It seems I'll just have to drag her back from where ever shithole she's hiding herself in. I may have lost everything else, but I'll be damned if she's fuckin' leaving me too.
"Leave my hair alone…" I grumbled through my pillow. My complaint only rewarded me with another tug on my hair and the sound of bright laughter, Sakura's laughter.
"I can't help it," she pleaded through her snickering, "It's just so stringy and bad. Haven't you heard of a brush?"
I then rose from my pillow and deadpanned her. "What's a brush?" Sakura only laughed more, which soon ended when she was pelted by my pillow.
All her mirth dissolved with that act. Sakura just glared emerald colored daggers at me. "You…Are…Dead…" she swore venomously, already moving to retaliate.
But once again I proved to be quicker, my arms swiftly pulling her close, and bringing our lips even closer. "No, fair…" she muttered through our closed lips. But she didn't pull away. In fact she moved closer, her soft delicate skin against mine, so soft and hot to the touch.
I heard her whispers in between kisses, her desires for me. "I want you inside me. I want you to hold me. I want you to love me, and me alone…I want you inside me."
Complying with her wishes, I gently laid her down on the bed, our bed. My eyes taking a brief moment to drink in the sight of her, her lovely strawberry hair, her shimmering emerald eyes that swam with so many emotions whenever she looked at me. I notice the slight tremor in her full pouting lips; my eyes drift further down to her not large, but not small breasts, to the slender curve of her hips.
She's beautiful, simply beautiful…How could I ever be so lucky?
Two resting bodies linger in Uzumaki, Naruto's bedroom. They both release an exhausted breath, the gentle morning light bathing their nude bodies in radiance. In almost no time, Sakura drifts off to sleep, while I watch over her, almost like I was her personal sentry, needed to ward all the bad things away. She told me that in my apartment was the first time in a long time she's had a peaceful night's rest.
A part of me lightens and darkens from the confession. A part of me wonders what horrors must she have endured, when she was with him. How many times was she not able to get away from his compound and just subjugated herself to whatever abuse Sasuke choose to deliver.
Even now my blood boils just thinking about it all. But I've learned I can't feed into my rage. Only more pain lies at the end of that road. And I'm tired of pain and I know she is too. I have something to look forward to now. Something the both of us can look forward to, because both of our lives have began again, our lives together in love.
So when she rolls over in her sleep, takes two whiffs of me, frowns her nose and says, "You stink," the prods me-out of my own bed-with her foot, I can only laugh lightly to myself, because I know love is there.
Haruno, Sakura has never once said, hinted, or admitted those words, that she loves Uzumaki, Naruto. That she's in love with me.
She doesn't have to.
For it lingers inside the space of her words. The underlining meaning of her stride, the softening stare she gives me. The willingness to allow her self to let go when we're together, her kiss… The fact she randomly likes to kiss the bridge of my nose, just to see my face scrunch up for her amusement.
Haruno, Sakura is in love with Uzumaki, Naruto in every aspect, except in word, and that's only a detail.
Sasuke, her first lover, her first love, hurt her…
He hurt her body and hurt her spirit. Her foundation of love was shattered. Her absolute belief in love was shaken.
In a sense she's afraid to love. Yet still she's encompassed by it and has embraced it. She's afraid to name what she feels for me, in the terror that as soon as she does, it will prove false like her first attempt.
But like I said, this is only a detail, a detail that will fade with time.
And despite what all others may think, I am a very patient man.
There are many sides to Uzumaki, Naruto; the sides that everyone sees. There is Naruto the warrior, powerful, matchless on the field of battle. There is Naruto the ANBU Commander, courageous, trusted fully by those he commands. There is Naruto the trickster, the side of him that holds the eternal child, still known for unpredictable hijinx. And there is Naruto the friend, fiercely loyal, caring for all life and all people.
For many years this was the only Narutos I've known. Those were all the faces I'd allow myself to see. But there is still so much more to the man that's becoming more dearer to me with each waking morning.
There is Naruto the dreamer. Anyone that's ever lived, even a short amount of time, in Konoha, and have all heard of Naruto's hopeful dream of being Hokage. Although now it seems more a reality then ever, no one's ever known how much he's tried, pushed and nearly fallen to make his dream come true.
This side is for Naruto alone, the part of him that he holds dear. Its one thing no one can ever take from him, his dreams. No matter how insane, no matter how impossible, no matter how many others tell him, "That's crazy, you can't do that." He will never stop; he will never stop believing, not until he proves us all wrong.
It is how the academy's number one screw-up can overcome all adversities and blossom into an elite class Shinobi. It is why now Hyuuga, Neji's newborn son will never have to worry about wearing the mark of his father. It is why the love of his life, the girl that's he's dreamed about since the first moment he's laid eyes on her, the same girl who at first couldn't stand him. Now I can't stand living without him, without his touch, without his words and without his heart. All of this was accomplished; all of this was done simply because for Naruto even dreams are possible.
Just as dreams and ambitions are apart of us, so are our most troublesome fears, enter Naruto, the wounded heart. It will be a few years from now when I will learn of this side of Naruto, before he'll allow me to see how deep the wounds in his heart ran.
It is the worrywart. The part of his that shows he's not as carefree as he'd like everyone to think. It is the pain he doesn't show. It is the loneliness that has been with him for nearly two decades, a loneliness that only I've been able to really penetrate and heal.
It's also fear, the fear of knowing that you are the vessel of total carnage that nearly destroyed your own village on the day of your birth. That one slip, one fatal flaw could cause the destruction of everything and everyone you've ever cared about. And even though he has a definite degree of mastery, the fear still lives.
This fear will resurrect a few years from now, when Naruto will seek out the confirmation of thirteen different Sanins, so that the curse, his curse of Kyuubi wouldn't be passed down to our children.
Naruto doesn't know it yet, but he has a defense against even his greatest worries and darkest troubles. Just as he's always been my strength and salvation, so will I be for him.
As I've said before, it will be some time before Naruto will let me fully into his world, but there is one part of him that I've been more recently introduced to, Naruto the lover. Years ago, no one could have ever convinced me that Naruto was capable of being a totally devout and caring lover. And now I find myself taking lessons from him as each day passes.
To feel the glowing affection of a person that always knows how to make you feel like a wanted and desired woman. It's almost as if it's by instinct with him. He just simply knows. I've never once told him what pleases me and what drives me crazy, he just simply knows. So when I ask him to kiss the small space under my navel, that always makes my stomach flutter, I can stop in mid-sentence because I feel his lips already there.
In a little over two day's he's learned all my wants and needs. I don't have to tell him when I want him to lick my pussy, I just simply relish when he spreads my legs and for a few seconds the brief feel of his hot breath, before his tongue touches my clit.
Then suddenly a surging jolt, quakes through my body. "Oh, oh, oh, Nar-ruto…" my voice rises in a subtle cry. The world just suddenly fades and all I can see is white. But still his lips, tongue, especially his tongue continues to tantalize, devouring me.
In the two nights I've spent with Naruto, I've felt more love, attention and affection than all the years I've spent with Sasuke. This is the beauty of being loved by Uzumaki, Naruto this is my joy.
My thoughts drift back to the present as the sound of rushing water triggers my interest. Noticing my personal heat source has left me in alone in his cold bed; I put the pieces together and figure he must be showering. Given the heated manner of our activities for the last twelve hours, I'd have to agree with his choice.
Dawning the infamous "Uber Ninja" T-shirt, I decided that seeking out and annoying my benefactor was far more appealing than, just waiting for him to finish. I rose from the bed and padded over to the bathroom.
As I got up to my feet, I was hit with a rather novel realization. There was a slight blaring ache that lingered in my lower half. Which also reminded me. Their personalities weren't the only thing that differed between Naruto and Sasuke. And apparently size did apparently matter.
There are many pleasing sights a girl could be get used to seeing on a daily basis, and a soaped up and lathered Naruto would be a very pleasant addition to add to the list. His body was tight and glistening from the hot water, streams of water running down his taut abs, sliding down his thighs, even a slight foamy run down his very nice ass. The guy was really making it hard for me to restrain myself from jumping him right then and there. I might be slightly sore down there, but I'd be willing to bear it.
But looking up I could only laugh. Now only was the genuine look of amazement on his face priceless, his shampoo-ed hair made him look like a Picasso's worst nightmare. Naruto narrowed his eyes at me, while hearing my laughter. He then made a pursing look at my attire. He could do nothing but smirk, he probably realized, his "Uber Ninja" T-shirt has now become my "Uber Ninja" T-shirt. I sent a wicked smile his way, which only invokes laughter from him, while he closes the curtain again and resumes his cleaning.
"You have to move…" I state to him, while discarding the shirt, sending it on the floor.
His head popped out from behind the curtain a second time, this time the hair was shampoo free. "Why is that?" he inquired.
I cross my arms over my chest, with little regard to my own nudity or his might I add, and answered, "Because, I'm taking your shower, that's why," I responded matter of factly.
Naruto brow frowned, giving me a look of incredibly, "You do realize this is my apartment don't you?"
"No, I realize this is our apartment," I off-handedly returned. I then paused; because despite all the bravado I just displayed, I realized what he said next would truly decide the course of our whole relationship. "It is, isn't it?" my voice no longer playful, but saturated with the seriousness and maybe a bit of the vulnerability I was feeling.
But I needed not to worry, never with him. "Everything, I have is yours," he said, kissing me gently, "Everything." That moment I knew, this was the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
I can feel my eyes soften almost to tears, but I fight them back as I continue to hold his gaze. "Hold me; please…Just for a little while," I don't know why I suddenly asked him; I just needed it from him. He doesn't respond, but he doesn't need to. His strong arms encircle me, as I step inside to join him.
Hot droplets of water instantly pelt my body, but their temperature is nothing compared to the burning lips along my neck. And for the first time in a long time I realize, everything is going to be all right.
How wrong I was…
I know I said this was gonna be a three parter. I know this because I'm looking at the chapter that has on it that it was gonna be a three parter. But I decided to make a good break here and finish up everything with one final chapter. Please don't hate me too, too much!