Disclaimer, I so don't own Harry Potter
A/N to everyone who is reading my other story the beast within, I haven't given up on it, I will write both of these at the same time. I had a sudden inspiration and wanted to get this out before the next book.
Lost and found
Harry Potter walked down the corridor towards the dungeon; it had been three days since Dumbledore had told him the prophecy and he still wasn't sure how to deal with it. Snape had sent Harry a note with breakfast that morning asking him to come down to the dungeons. Harry was pretty sure it was about either occulmency lessons or the pensive incident.
Harry arrived at a portrait of a young man brewing a potion, Harry couldn't help but smirk as he knocked on the door. A moment later Snape opened it and gestured Harry inside, before Snape could speak Harry cleared his throat and said, "Sir I think I know what this is about."
Snape looked shocked, "You, you do? "
Harry had never heard Snape stutter before so he just shrugged it off, "Yes, Dumbledore wants you to start teaching me occulmency again." Snape visibly relaxed as Harry continued, "First off I want to say that I'm sorry for looking into your pensive, but no one was telling me what was going on and I thought you were hiding information about the department of mysteries or something like that. Then once I got in I was so fascinated with seeing my father and his friends that I didn't think of leaving, I'm sorry."
Snape nodded, "I understand and I accept your apology but that is not why I wanted to talk to you. Are you aware Mr. Potter that your mother and I were married at one time?'
Harry's mouth practically hit the floor, "What?!"
Snape nodded, "Yes after the incident you witnessed I felt the need to apologize to Lily for what I called her and to thank her for trying to help me. I don't know why I did that, but something about her drew us together. A few months later we started dating. When my father forced me to join the death eaters it was your mothers idea that I become a spy for the Order, we married just after graduation. We told no one because my father would have skinned me alive, and the Dark Lord would have cursed whatever was left into oblivion. The two of us were very happy together for several years. Then one day I came home and Lily begged me to stop spying, to run away with her to some faraway place where we would be safe. I asked her why she wanted me to quit, true she had had problems with my being a spy before but this was so abrupt. Lily wouldn't give me a reasonable explanation and I told her that I couldn't quit so she left me and married James not long after."
Harry swallowed hard, he didn't know where this story was going but for some reason it interested him, "Is that why you hate me so much, because I remind of what you could have had with my mom?"
Snape nodded slowly, "Yes that was why I hated you. Harry this morning I received a letter that your mother wrote me not long before she died and I think you need to read it"
Snape held out an old letter with a shaking hand, Harry took it and started to read,
My dearest Severus,
If you are reading this then I am dead and I must tell you something. Severus the reason that I asked you to stop spying was because I had just found out that I was pregnant with your child.
I am sorry Severus, but I couldn't tell you while you were still spying because then Voldemort might have found out. My son Harry is also your son, when he was born I used a charm mixed with James' blood to make Harry look like him. The charm will begin to wear off when Harry turns 16. However, because I used James' blood, and because of your familial relationship with James, Harry will still retain some of James' appearance. In the end Harry will look like a combination of all three of us.
Again I am so sorry for not telling you sooner, but I was concerned for both my safety and Harry's, please take good care of him for me and remember that I am always with both of you.
As Harry finished reading the letter his hands started to shake there was only one thought in his head, 'this can't be true, I can't be Snape's SON we hate each other!' Harry looked up at Snape who was staring back obviously trying to gauge his reaction, finally (because he couldn't think of anything else to say) Harry asked, "What does she mean your close familial relationship with James?"
Snape sighed heavily, "James and I were double first cousins, my father was his mother's brother and my mother was his father's sister. It's as close as you can get to being siblings without actually sharing a parent."
Harry felt his forehead crinkle as he asked, "Then why did you hate each other so much?"
Snape closed his eyes and said, "My father asked Edward (James father) to join the death eaters with him. Edward refused and cut off all contact with my parents. Edward raised James to believe that my entire family was evil and James took it to heart, then the fact that we both pursued Lily only added fuel to the fire."
Harry nodded feeling something wet on his face, he realized that he had started crying, when he started crying he didn't know, but he didn't care, "So what happens now?"
Snape swallowed Harry wondered if he was fighting back tears, "I obviously can not acknowledge you as my son because I am still spying, but you and I can talk during your 'remedial potions lessons' and we can communicate with each other through these." Snape reached into his robes pulled out a piece of parchment and handed it to Harry.
Harry looked at him confused, "Sir?"
Snape smirked and felt mildly assured by the fact that at least something was still normal. Snape shifted his feet and said, "This is a special parchment charmed so that when you write on it the words will appear on my parchment and vice versa."
Harry nodded, "thank you sir."
Snape walked over to Harry and grabbed Harry's shoulder in a comforting grip. Harry nearly fainted from shock, 'what was next Voldemort handing out sweets?' Snape spoke in a slightly chocked voice, "Mr...Er Harry, I want you to know that if I could acknowledge you I would, but it is not safe. I loved your mother very much and if she had told me she was pregnant I would have stopped spying in a second."
Harry jerked his head up and saw the sincerity in Snape (his father's) eyes, "Really?"
Snape nodded, "Yes, I have always wanted children of my own, your mother and I had even talked about having kids before but we decided we wanted to wait until after the Dark Lord was defeated. Then once Lily died I thought I had lost my only chance that is why Mr. Malfoy and I are so close" Harry looked confused and Snape responded to the unanswered question, "He is my godson." Harry nodded and stared back at his mother's letter not really reading it just looking. Harry felt like his head was spinning he wasn't sure how he felt about this, a part of him was furious at his mother for keeping him from having a family (something he'd wanted his whole life). A part of him was angry at Snape for always being such a git, maybe if they had a better relationship this would be easier. A third part of him was jealous that Malfoy had something with his father that he didn't and a part of him was happy that he had the chance to get to know his father rather than just having stories told to him by Remus or other people.
Harry just stood there for a moment unable to move or even think then he just burst into tears and started to sob. To Harry's great surprise Snape actually pulled him into hug, Harry grabbed onto Severus and started to cry, not caring that this was his slimy potions master or that they just realized they were related. At this moment Harry probably would have accepted a hug from Voldemort himself this was all too much for him and he needed to break down.
After a few minutes Harry calmed down, he swallowed and said, "Sorry."
Snape shook his head, "You have nothing to apologize for."
Harry looked around and asked, "Can I tell Ron and Hermione?"
Snape sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "If you truly want to then you may. However, if I were you I would wait until after the events of the department of mysteries have died down a little."
Harry nodded, "Thank you. I, I, I think maybe I should go now, I have to pack up for the summer here."
Harry handed the letter back Snape took it and said, "I know this is hard on you, if you need to talk my door is open."
Harry said a quiet, "Thank you." And left.
Harry was still trying to get around the idea of Snape being his father when he was dropped off at the train station. The Order didn't question him on his behavior because they figured he was mourning Sirius (which was partly true) they gave Vernon the warning about treating Harry well and Harry could tell by the look on his uncle's face that he was going to pay for it.
As soon as the order had left Vernon grabbed Harry roughly by the arm and dragged him to the car. Once they were back on Privet drive Vernon threw Harry's trunk into the cupboard under the stairs and locked it. Vernon steered Harry upstairs and pushed him into his bedroom. Harry heard the click as his uncle locked the locks on his bedroom door, "Great just great." Harry placed Hedwig and her cage on his desk then took his wand and the parchment his father (that felt so weird) had given to him and put them into the loose floor board under his bed. Harry took out some spare parchment and wrote to his friends asking them to send him food (he was pretty sure that the Dursley's wouldn't be giving him food anytime soon).
Harry sat down on his bed not sure what to do or what to think his mind felt like jelly. Harry really needed to deal with his feelings, he wasn't sure what else to do so he pulled an old journal aunt Marge had bought for Dudley out of the book shelf and started to draw. Harry wasn't much at writing down his feelings and he had always felt more at ease with expressing his feelings through pictures rather than words. As Harry drew he looked towards the door of his room hoping that somehow everything would work out okay but knowing it was unlikely to happen.
A/N Please review and tell me to continue or not. To my fellow authors, the words DYING PRAYING AND LYING are not supposed to be spelled with an ie.