Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
By Silver Sailor Ganymede
The night was black: black as the Lethifold, and the air seemed colder than a Dementor's breath before it strikes to kill. Rain fell down from the sable sky in such a way that it would make many think that the Gods themselves were weeping.
And in this unnatural darkness and rain, one young man was walking. His black robes and black hair were stained and soaked through with both rain and blood. His eyes, were eerily empty… they were completely hollow, like those of someone with no soul, and yet they were filled with tears. And who was this young man? He was Severus Snape, but to most people he was nobody.
Severus' father had always told him that he was just a useless nobody. But Severus' father was dead, wasn't he? Yes, Severus' father was dead… dead at Severus' own hand by order of his Master. Severus' didn't know why he was crying; his father wasn't the first person he had killed, nor would he be the last, and he had never cried before when he killed… but for some reason he felt guilt for murdering his father, the one man he hated most.
But why was he upset? Why? His father had despised him. He was nobody to his father: and his father was nobody to him. There would be no one to find his father dead… but then again there would have been no body for anyone to find even if there was anyone left, which, of course, there wasn't. The other Death Eaters had properly disposed of his father's corpse: yes, they'd disposed of it… bodies that were around Fenrir Greyback disappeared completely soon after death.
But still, Severus couldn't get rid of this rising guilt. He had murdered his own father. Severus shook his head, trying to stop the tears flowing from his asphodel-like eyes. Of course it didn't work; he was soon weeping, his tears mixing with the rain, invisible to all.
'Why did you do it?' the voice in the back of Severus' head asked. Severus sighed; it was just the perfect time for hiss conscience, which he thought had long deserted him, to rear its ugly head.
"I did it because I had to" Severus hissed. "He was a filthy muggle."
'Your father was a muggle, but your mother wasn't Pureblood either, was she?'
'You know I'm right, Severus. Your mother was a mudblood; your father was a muggle; that means that you, Severus, are just like them: you are just as filthily blooded as Lily Evans; don't deny it; you know I'm right. You're nothing more than a filthy little Mudblood.'
"I am no Mudblood!"
'Oh, but you are. You are just a weak, useless mudblood. You're a pitiful excuse for a wizard, a complete coward. You're nobody, Severus; you're nobody at all.'
"I said SHUT UP!" Severus screamed. He held his hands to his ears, trying to block the voice. He managed to silence his conscience, but he still could not the images of his father's body writhing and bleeding under the Sectumsempra Curse: he still could not block out the memory of his father's screams for mercy, for forgiveness, for… death.
'You killed him simply because he was a muggle, didn't you.' That damned voice again.
"Yes, I did."
'Why did you kill him for that?'
"The muggles are evil."
'Don't kid yourself, Severus. You know that they're not evil, well not most of them anyway, just like with wizards. But you, no, Severus, you are the evil one, not your father.'
"He killed my mother."
'Eileen Snape hung herself; your Father, Tobias, had nothing to do with it. She was a manic-depressive, you know that.'
"He was a muggle: he deserved to die; all muggles deserve to die."
'Then kill yourself, you goddamned hypocrite! Your 'Master' will not care in the slightest. You are nobody, aren't you? You are not 'Severus', you are not 'Snape'; you are simply nobody.'
"I am", Severus muttered. "I should be dead. I am the evil one. I am the coward who killed his own father simply to save his own skin."
'You are right, for once. Just get it over with, do it now.'
"I can't betray my master."
'Well if that's how you wish to think, you will be nobody for the rest of your pitiful existence.'
And then his conscience completely faded away, and Severus Snape was left totally alone. The night was black: black as the Lethifold, and the air seemed colder than a Dementor's breath before it strikes to kill. Rain fell down from the sable sky in such a way that it would make many think that the Gods themselves were weeping. And in this obsidian night, a young man called Severus Snape stood in a deserted street and wept for a loss that he had inflicted upon himself. But then again, he wasn't Severus Snape anymore, was he? No; he was nobody… and he would remain nobody until his dying day.
Yes, Severus Snape was dead… the man who stood and cried in that deserted street had no name, not anymore. There was no more 'Snivellus', no more 'Severus', no more 'Half-Blood Prince'. Had no name, no sense of truth or honour anymore… he was a murderer…a mudblood…a nobody… and that's all he ever would be; nobody.