AN: Look, I didn't lie! :) More! So. Yeah. Still not my best writing. But I'm trucking along.

Warnings: Not beta-ed! Lots of commas. Sex scene (whut?).


Numb

Harry tugged at his stiff, formal robe and tried not to fidget. He hardly ever had to wear robes as they weren't conducive for training or physical activities. Plus they made him think of Ministry officials like the former Minster Fudge, his robes had always been over the top. Sirius stood silent and somber next to Harry. Harry figured if anyone would have been uncomfortable in formal robes it would be Sirius, after all, the guy loved to chill in his dog form, but the tall man hadn't fidgeted or tugged on his clothing once. Harry sighed in resignation, if his Godfather could do it, so could he. But maybe it was the occasion that was causing Sirius to conform to societal rules.

On the other side of Sirius stood Remus Lupin. Harry had always liked Remus; whenever Harry saw him he would sneak Harry chocolate frogs. Unfortunately Remus didn't get to visit Harry much. He was constantly looking for work or looking for a safe place to stay for the full moon. Remus' formal robes were in shabby condition, the black was fading to a gray and the edges were frayed. But for once he didn't look guilty while with Sirius, he just looked sad. Sirius kept sniffing and wiping at his eyes.

Harry shifted uncomfortably again. This time it wasn't the robe that was bothering him. It was the fact he wasn't sad. He stared at the two tombstones in front of him and tried to will some sadness on.

"Fifteen years," Sirius' voice cracked as he spoke. "James I'm so sorry things played out like that with-with that rat. I still miss you guys so much."

'It's not like you had anything to take you mind off them over the years,' Harry thought to himself. Sirius had been out of prison for a few years now and he had resumed his Auror career but the guy was still single and lived in a drafty, creepy townhouse all by himself. Harry had also overheard some of the other Aurors mention Sirius' heavy drinking habits.

This was the first visit Harry had to his parents' grave with Sirius, who Harry still wasn't all that comfortable with. Harry had previously visited the graves a couple times with Remus. Harry liked to visit his parents on the anniversary of their deaths and his troupe of trainers always tried to accommodate him. Harry did it to remind him what his training was all about: avenging his parents. The Wizarding World surely liked to think Harry was training to save their world, but Harry was really training to kill Voldemort, a crazed psycho that tried to kill babies. He didn't really care about saving anyone outside of who he considered his family.

Harry turned his thoughts back to the tombstones. He did miss his parents, but more the idea of having parents than missing them specifically. He didn't have a single memory of either his mom or dad that he could recall without the help of Dementors, and that was a memory Harry avoided like the plague. Harry occasionally wondered how his life would have turned out if his parents had never died but then that would mean he wouldn't have grown up with Roger, Tracey, Neville and Mandy. And those thoughts hurt worse than any loss he felt over his parents. If his parents were still alive he wouldn't have spent a month in the Amazon training. On one hand, the trip was awful and he nearly died. On the other hand, how many kids his age got to visit the Amazon? How many people got to tussle with anacondas and live? He had a strong love/hate relationship with his training, but the thought of not being part of the Myrmidons was excruciating. At the end of the day, if he had a choice, he'd pick this life again.


Sirius' body fell unnaturally to the ground and his face was still frozen in triumph. Harry didn't really know what happened next, all he knew was that a white hot rage washed over him. Another person he had failed to protect, but not just any person, his Godfather whom he had finally just started to connect with.

The next thing Harry knew he was on top of Bellatrix's still body, her head was bloody and he had a tight grip on her throat. There were pops of disapparate around him, Tonks at his side and two other death eaters on the ground, the one that Sirius had caught and one that Neville was standing over.

Roger was steps away looking a bit bewildered, and thankfully he spoke first, "What the hell?"

"Yeah, did we miss something?" Neville also looked puzzled.

"What?" Harry asked. He finally loosened his tight grip on Bellatix's throat.

"They all just, disappeared. Mid-battle. Rog, that was weird."

"We need to report this attack." Roger straightened his stance but kept looking around as if he expected the Death Eaters to return.

"All ready did," Tracey's voice filtered over the comm. "It sounds like there was an attack on that Ministry's Halloween Ball too. There's pretty much mass panic."

"Tell them we have prisoners. Three. Get Shacklebolt." Harry finally moved off of Bellatrix, she didn't seem to be dead, just unconscious. Harry was glad since he couldn't seem to remember what exactly he did to her.

Dumbledore, Snape and McGonagall must have been right outside the wards as they came running onto the scene a moment after Harry finished speaking. Moments later Flitwick came wheezing after them. Dumbledore took in the scene with a frown on his face.

"What happened? Is anybody hurt?" McGonagall gasped as she caught sight of Sirius Black. Snape wore a grim expression.

"Professor, there is a tunnel under Honeydukes, Mandy has many of the students down there with her, supposedly it goes to the castle," Roger spoke first.

"Yes, the statue. Flitwick, meet Mandy and the students she has with her at the one-eyed witch statue in the third floor corridor." Dumbledore's voice sounded sad as he took in the scene before him.

Flitwick nodded and disapparted. Dumbledore must have changed Hogwarts' wards temporarily, Harry thought briefly.

"There were ten Death Eaters in all," Harry sounded calm as he approached Dumbledore. Harry's hands were shaking with repressed anger and he crossed his arms to hide them. "They took down the wards and then put up their own. They snatched Luna Lovegood and Auror Williamson." Harry paused as Tracey came walking back from the alley she had disappeared down with a still calm Luna.

"Where are the rest of the students and town residents?" Snape asked.

"We told everyone to hide and stay away from the window and doors," Roger responded.

"Minerva, Severus, will you start gathering students and taking them back to the castle? Get everyone in the Great Hall so we can ensure no one is missing and no one is hurt."

The next hour flew by as students were rounded up, Hermione proved to have a calm head during the chaos and she and two prefects helped Snape and McGonagall. Students were ushered back to the castle, many were shaken up but not a single student had been harmed. Auror Savage took Auror Williamson, still unconscious, to Saint Mungos and returned later to take Sirius' body to the hospital as well. Roger and Tracey took the Death Eater captives to the Ministry's holding cells with a hasty portkey Tracey made out of her shoe. Harry went to get Draco, who true to his word hadn't moved from his hiding spot. Draco was relieved to see Harry and refused to head back to the castle right away. Instead he helped Professor Snape in gathering students from hiding. Shacklebolt arrive not long after with one other Auror, he looked beleaguered but started assessing and taking statements. Mandy had made it back to Hogwarts via the tunnel and reported in over the comm before helping Madame Pomfrey check over returning students in the Great Hall.

"Harry you should get that wound treated," Neville was looking at Harry with a frown during a calm moment after taking Seamus Finnigan's statement. They were both back on High Street and almost all of the students had left Hogsmeade.

"What wound? Oh!" Harry probed with his finger at a jagged, burned patch of skin right under his ribs. He dimly remembered Bellatrix jabbing her wand into his side and screeching some sort of burning hex when he tackled her but Harry's memory was still a whiteout from Sirius' fall. And now that he acknowledged the wound its throbbing pain finally registered in his brain.

"Madame Pomfrey is checking students over in the Great Hall, let's head back to the school." Neville gestured in the vague direction of Hogwarts.

"We still need to process this scene," Harry argued.

"Don't worry Harry. Nev, Tracey and I will stay with Shacklebolt and Savage. Take Tonks with you, she's walking funky and Mungo's is going to be overcrowded with patients from the other attack." Roger frowned as Tonks was still taking statements from Luna, Hermione, and Draco and she seemed off balance.

Draco hadn't even seen any of the fighting but he looked pale and squeamish regardless. Harry frowned as he took in Draco's appearance. Why did he seem so shook up? Normally Harry would have argued with Roger that he should remain at a scene until every piece of evidence had been cataloged but the combination of his throbbing wound and Draco's shaken face he decided not to argue. Just this once.

It wasn't until Harry was in the Great Hall surrounded by the dull roar of hundreds of students talking and Madame Promfrey putting the finishing touches on his burn salve that Sirius' death really registered with him. The Rage had finally died down, his shaking hands were finally still, and his mind finally began to process the information. His Godfather was dead. Shit, why hadn't he gone after Bellatrix first? She was by far the most dangerous person on the scene due to her insanity. When the fuck had she gotten out of Azkaban? Sirius was dead. Why hadn't Harry celebrated the Yule with his Godfather last year? Sirius had practically begged but Harry hadn't wanted to deal with the awkwardness and had ditched his lonely Godfather to eat cheap, greasy Chinese food with his Myrmidons. His Godfather was dead. And he didn't do a single thing to prevent it. Sirius was dead. Why didn't he feel sad? He just felt numb. Like a giant cavern had opened up inside his chest. His Godfather was dead.

"Harry, are you okay?" Mandy frowned at the dark expression on Harry's face.

"What?" Harry turned to face Mandy's worried expression. When had she come over?

"Harry, let's go back to my room," Draco tugged on Harry's hand. He didn't know if Harry realized he had been clenching Draco's hand all night. Harry had taken his hand as they walked back to the castle and hadn't let go of it even for a second.

Harry looked down at their joined hands. He couldn't get Sirius' dead eyes out of his head. His Godfather was dead. That victorious smirk and dead, blank eyes were hanging over him. Why didn't he feel anything? He was so…empty. He needed something to take his mind of this. He needed to feel something. He needed Draco. Harry looked into Draco's silver eyes. Draco also looked worried and on edge. "Okay" Harry responded hoarsely.

"Good," Mandy nodded, "I'll keep an eye on things here with Tonks." Harry nodded in acknowledgment and let Draco lead him from the Hall.

The second Draco closed the bedroom door Harry was on him. He pushed Draco into the door, it wasn't harsh but firm. Draco's breath hitched as he felt Harry press himself against Draco's backside. He could feel Harry's warmth from his shoulders to his knees. "Draco," Harry whispered in his ear, "Draco I need to feel... I need you."

Draco understood what he meant. He had his own terrible thoughts rolling around in his head that he wanted pushed out of his head. "Harry, take me," Draco whispered back.

Harry's hands felt like they were everywhere at once. They were undoing his trousers, his robe, and his shirt's buttons. They were tracing light patterns on his exposed skin, leaving his skin burning in their wake. Draco didn't even know he was moving until his bare back touched the top of his bedding. He ripped into Harry's shirt urgently and tugged his head down for a searing kiss. Harry devoured Draco's mouth. Draco wrapped his arms around Harry's back, who slid into place on top of him. Groping a broad, muscular back and leaving a light red trail from his nails, Draco worked his tongue against Harry's while his body flared with raw need like he had never felt before.

Passion and desire were welling inside of Draco. His body barely remembered it being like this; it had been months since his one and only time with Harry, but his body responded to Harry's like a finely tuned instrument. One of his legs curled to hook around Harry's thigh, a hold that allowed him to writhe against the body between his legs and successfully rub his still clothed length with friction.

Harry gave off a low groan when Draco rubbed against him, brushing his straining cock in a dangerously pleasurable way. He could feel this. Pulling away from Draco's plush, heavenly lips and a skillful tongue, he gazed down at Draco as he hurried out of the rest of his clothes. Draco protested as Harry pushed him away, just for a moment though, so Harry he could pull off the rest of Draco's clothes.

"I need you," Harry spoke, hands sliding along a Draco's smooth side and moving up to touch silver blond hair. "I need you more than anything else."

Tipping his head back slightly, Draco pressed his lips firmly against the Harry's. "I'm right here. I'm yours," he murmured, shivering deliciously as Harry's tongue snaked back into his mouth to silence him. The slick appendage delved deep in sudden fierceness, causing Draco's eyes to flutter shut again as he was overwhelmed with emotion and desire.

Harry started grinding his erection against the pretty boy beneath him. Reaching a hand down, he slipped a finger inside the blonde and began to stretch the tight entrance. He muttered an 'accio' against Draco's lips as lube whizzed into his other hand and he popped the top off with his thumb.

Spreading his legs farther apart, Draco didn't try to hide how much he wanted Harry inside him. He had never wanted anything so much in his life as he did right now. This felt so much more right than their previous time. Draco mewled, a sound devoured by Harry, as he bucked against Harry's thrusting, lubed fingers.

"Ready?" Harry asked, leaning back and shivering at the sight his aroused lover made. Draco's cheeks flushed a pretty pink and kiss bruised lips parted to take in desperate breaths, the blonde was displaying himself beautifully for Harry.

Nodding erratically, Draco ran his hands along Harry's tanned skin, noting the starkness of his pale skin against Harry's dark tan. He gripped Harry's shoulders with the knowledge that it had been a long time since they'd last had sex and Harry's thick cock would feel just as painful going in as it had the first time. Blaise had mentioned a charm for a tingling, soothing lube months ago, Draco wished he could remember how it went.

Snatching the discarded bottle of lube again, Harry poured the clear liquid over his straining erection. Smearing it, he gave himself a couple firm strokes. His mind was quiet and only filled with Draco, and the feelings of desire and lust swirled in him, and it was glorious.

Licking his lips, Draco let out a slight squeak as his legs were hitched over Harry's broad shoulders. He stiffened briefly as the tip of the brunet's large cock breached his entrance. He tried to relax again as he moved his grip to Harry's forearms.

With a squeeze to Draco's slim hips, Harry thrust forward. Forcing his cock in a few inches, he pulled back and quickly repeated. Regardless of Draco's stifled cry of pain, he continued until he was able to bury himself completely and then stilled. Draco felt even more glorious then he remembered. He never wanted to let the blonde go again.

Draco took measured breaths to bear with the pain, wasn't this supposed to get easier after the first time? He vowed this time to not let months pass before he and Harry did this again. Why had he insisted on waiting and having Harry woo him? Sometimes he was such a drama queen.

Gritting his teeth, Harry fought the dark urge to simply fuck the blonde beneath him. He couldn't do that to Draco. Draco wasn't some faceless body, he was Draco. And he had been yearning for this for months. He was not going to screw this up. He leaned down to kiss Draco again.

After several painstaking minutes, a time filled by Harry's tongue in his mouth, the pain was ebbing and it was time for Harry to fuck him until he forgot this horrible day. "Please move," Draco begged.

Harry's heart skipped a beat, though it was hard to tell with the rapid pace it was going. The way Draco clung to him was so desperate, his sadistic desires to just let loose on Draco came rising back. His need and possessiveness were growing and Harry's failure to keep everyone safe came flooding back to him. "No," Harry grunted and started to drive his length deeply into Draco.

"Nahh," Draco moaned. Having Harry inside of him and moving felt so good. Better than good. Amazing. The pleasure that spiked through him as he was stimulated from within was incomparable.

Rolling his hips, Harry picked up the pace and began thrusting even harder. Drawing out a little more, he pushed back in hard. But he wanted more, and harder. "Turn over," he directed, extracting himself from Draco's arms with a smirk at Draco's reluctance.

Turning over, Draco frowned at the feeling of unsatisfied emptiness after being so full and complete moments ago. He spread his legs apart, displaying exactly where he wanted Harry to return to.

"Fuck," Harry cursed. In one fell thrust, he plunged back into Draco's tight heat. The new positioning he had was far more suited for deep penetration he craved. With his length completely buried, he drew out and slammed back in. And again.

Crying out in ecstasy, Draco dropped his arms to the bed and clawed at the bedding below him to keep steady. Arching wildly, he turned his head to the side and gasped unevenly. "So good," he moaned. Over and over, Draco was thrust into, fucked hard and deep. Pain was long forgotten as the bundle of nerves inside him was mercilessly stimulated by Harry's swollen manhood. He couldn't take any more when Harry's calloused hand fisted his arousal. He came, shooting his release onto the bedding below him.

Harry groaned and began thrusting shallowly and unevenly. Building up to that moment, he was soon coming into Draco, filling him. He convulsed in violent shudders of pleasure and gave a final thrust before collapsing gracelessly atop Draco.

Draco's eyes were shut as he shivered and wallowed in the feel of hot release filling him. Thoughts of Death Eaters and that voice were eons away.


"Where's Harry?" Shacklebolt asked as he entered the Great Hall with the remaining Myrmidon's and Headmaster Dumbledore. The hall was almost empty, most of the students had returned to their common rooms. Mandy was right inside the main doors waiting for them. Tonks had left shortly after Madame Pomfrey patched her up to start filing reports at the Ministry. Shacklebolt felt a wave of relief wash over him as he took in Mandy's unharmed appearance. She seemed antsy, but that was probably from being left out of the battle.

"He wasn't doing so well so he went back to Draco's room," Mandy answered.

"Draco's room?" Shacklebolt asked curiously, "as in Draco Malfoy?"

"Uh, yeah, they've been shagging," Mandy shrugged.

Oh. Shacklebolt blinked. He tried to stay out of the kids' love lives. But sometimes it was difficult, especially when one of them tried to pull him in. Mandy's brown eyes stared up at him innocently and he did his best to ignore her allure. "It's been a long day, between this and the Ministry attack… we have all the initial reports, so I want everyone to try and get some rest. We'll reconvene tomorrow morning at oh-six-hundred. Understood?"

The salutes were sloppy but Shacklebolt didn't care. He nodded and turned to head out.

Mandy watched the tall, powerful Auror leave with a wistfully expression on her face.

"Luna would you like me to escort you to Ravenclaw?" Neville asked Luna who now the last student in the Hall, besides Hermione. Neville was worried about the pretty blonde even though she seemed to be the least affected out of everyone today. He found her quirky behavior puzzling yet endearing.

Luna nodded with a serene smile. "That would be very nice," she responded and took Neville's offered arm.

Tracey gave Mandy a tight hug before they both headed off in separate directions.

"C'mon, you have to be exhausted." Roger pulled a pliant Hermione under his arm and began to escort her up the main staircase.

"Roger, will you stay with me tonight? Not, you know, just stay, sleep, I just don't want to be alone—"

"Don't worry," Roger interrupted before Hermione could go on a full apologetic tangent. "And yes, I'll stay with you. No funny business." He grinned. Hermione blushed a deep scarlet in response. Roger found it adorable. He knew Hermione wasn't ready for anything that serious yet. The poor girl was seventeen and had never had a boyfriend before him. Hell, she'd never been kissed before him. He knew not to push her. She was worth the wait.


Promptly at oh-six-hundred hours Sunday morning the Myrmidons and Kingsley Shacklebolt reconvened in Professor McGonagall's office. She had gladly given up her office temporarily to house their meeting. The six of them stood around McGonagall's tidy desk as Roger laid out notes and files. He had spent half the night jittery and jotting notes about his various theories on the attack while Hermione slept beside him unaware.

"I think this was a distraction. Look, they attacked Hogsmeade, they attacked the ministry function, and while both had plenty of muggle-born targets, there were very few casualties and no abductions. I think they staged the two attacks to have all emergency personnel concentrating on the two attacks while they did something else." Roger shared his primary theory.

"What do you think they did?" Shacklebolt frowned as he tried to decipher Roger's scribbly handwriting on the parchment in front of him. Roger's theory made sense.

"Well, I think they were after something in the ministry. With two attacks in two totally different areas the security would have been striped to the bare minimum," Roger pointed out.

"They could of have placed listening spells or booby-trap runes in Scrimgeour or Moody's offices," Neville added.

"Or they could have been after an artifact, over the summer there was a backlog of dark artifacts that the ministry had confiscated on raids," Tracey pointed out.

"Voldemort wasn't seen at Hogsmeade or at the Ball so it's plausible he was there." Mandy agreed.

"I want to know about Bellatrix Lestrange. How did she get out of Azkaban? And who else may have escaped?" Harry brought up. He was feeling much better after last night. But he still didn't feel sad over the loss of his Godfather. He was angry, so he supposed that was part of the grieving process, right?

"Moody wants to question her and the other two Death Eaters himself. Antonin Dolohov was captured at the ball last night, another one who is supposed to be in Azkaban. And good work Roger, I'll start having everyone comb their departments to see if anything is missing or if there are unfamiliar magical energies." Shacklebolt clapped Roger on the shoulder with one hearty clap. "Harry," Shacklebolt turned to his star pupil, Harry dreaded the look on his face, he was going to say something about Sirius and Harry needed to look properly mournful, and Harry wasn't sure he could pull it off. "Remus wanted me to ask you if it's all right if he takes care of the funeral arrangements instead."

Harry blinked in surprise, that was certainly not what he thought was going to be said. "Uh, yeah, of course. I know they were really close." Close before Remus spent a good decade thinking his best friend was a murderer. Remus had never forgiven himself for doubting his friend and Harry knew Sirius was pretty hurt by his friend's lack of faith. They stayed friends but the few interactions Harry had ever seen of them together seemed forced. Remus was probably only doing this out of guilt but it was still a huge relief to Harry.

Shacklebolt nodded before turning to leave the office. "You guys report if you learn anything else."

"Of course," Harry nodded.

"So who do you think they are going to get to replace Black as the DADA professor?" Roger asked as he gathered his notes.

"Dude, Roger, lay off the Sirius talk in front of Harry." Neville whispered harshly.

Harry shook his head, "Nev it's okay. I'm fine."

Nev gave him a 'yeah, right' look before replying, "Hey I know you two weren't close but it's okay to be sad about this. I don't like my Gran most of the time but I'd still miss her if she died."

"Nev your Gran is never going to die, she's somehow found the key to immortality." Mandy joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Harry did think that was funny, "Mandy's right, the old woman is the most stubborn person in existence. I bet Death doesn't even want to deal with her." Nev grinned. "But seriously guys, it's okay to talk about Sirius. It sucks that he died and I wish that I had killed Bellatrix but at least she's been captured and he went down fighting. He'll be remembered as a hero, and I think that's what he would have wanted." Harry didn't mention that he didn't feel any sadness, he didn't really want to bring up the depressing fact of how broken he really was. At least not yet.

The others seemed to believe his words and they finished gathering their materials and headed down to the Great Hall to eat some breakfast.


Draco paced nervously across his bedroom. He was all alone, Harry was meeting with his Myrmidons and Kingsley Shacklebolt about Merlin-Knew-What. And for once Draco wasn't upset he was in the dark. Draco had pretended to be asleep when Harry left the bed, he didn't want Harry to sense he was upset about something. Especially since mind blowing sex usually calmed people down, right? He paused a moment before his floor length mirror and studied his unkempt hair. He was so distraught he didn't even bother to fix it before turning and resuming his pace. Three death eaters had been caught: his aunt Bella, Amycus Carrow and someone he didn't know. But that wasn't what was freaking him out.

He glanced again at the perch where his personal eagle sometimes roosted, his Malfoy eagle was spoiled and didn't like mixing with all the other birds in the school owlery. He had sent an emergency letter to his mother and had put enough charms on it so if anyone intercepted the letter it would burst into flames if anyone but his mother tried to read it.

What if his mother already knew? Draco's panic was rising again. What if she purposely kept this information from him? That didn't seem likely, she had been fighting with the ministry for over a year now about her associations with Death Eaters, if he had suddenly showed up on the doorstep no doubt his mother would have sent him packing and missing a pound of flesh. Right? Draco shuddered. Malfoys always put their family first. Unlike the Blacks, who were notorious for disowning family members, Malfoys always took care of each other even if it meant supporting the disgraced family member and sponsoring a discreet extended trip to India for them. But his mother wasn't a Malfoy by blood, she was a Black, so she would never have taken him back, right? Draco felt dread and nausea swirling within him. Should he tell Harry? But family came first. Harry was just an infatuation, right? Was Draco prepared to betray his family, his own blood, his father for a boyfriend? For Harry Potter?

Lucius Malfoy was supposed to be in jail, rotting away with greasy, limp hair in Azkaban, there had been no word of a break out, or break in, and yet his father had led the attack on Hogsmeade. Draco knew his father's voice, better than he knew anyone else's. How often in his childhood had he strived for his father's affection? Praise? Hell, just plain acknowledgement? Lucius had been a crappy father, yes, but should Draco betray his father for Harry freaking Potter? Draco let out an unseemly yell and fell back onto his bed. His mother couldn't respond soon enough.


AN: SLNS called it! Anywho... more soon! And let me know what you thought of some long awaited sex.

Review?