Full Summary: When Kagome is tricked into going to a party at her worst enemy's mansion, things go terribly wrong on her part and she finds herself tied to him in the worst way possible. Will she be able to escape this situation of lust and heartache?
Kagome Higurashi: 17;Black hair; blue eyes. Assistant at a downtown daycare in Kyoto.
Inuyasha Takahashi: 18; Silver hair; golden eyes. Kyoto's heart throb.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Hello, all. This is officially the last chapter of Drunken Seduction before the epilogue, I'm sorry to say. Beautifully edited and disgustingly late, I apologize for the wait. No excuses, people. The first scene of this may be a little confusing for some, so feel free to ask if you have an questions. And remember to review people, or there just might not be an epilogue. And otherwise that, please enjoy. :-)
Note: A scene below might look familiar to all you Trigun fans. ;-)
"Oh…Inuyasha…"His hot lips soon rewarded her loud gasp of ecstasy as they trailed over her blushing body, while his own physical thrill for her pushed heatedly onto her inner thigh. She gasped under his tongue's scrutiny as her nails clutched and ripped at the surface of his tight back, the muscles beneath his skin rippling and contracting in pleasure to her heated touch. She could feel his warm kisses slowly trek their way from her bare belly to her mouth as she moaned against his lips, sending his body into another state of torturous fire that could not–would not–be denied. He ground his hips against hers, and his drunken eyes lost focus as she responded heatedly against his member. Her tiny hands held him there, stroking and probing like a curious child and he soon felt his body convulse from the torrents of pleasure and desire bubbling inside of him.
Golden eyes nearly disappeared in the back of his head as her hands worked harder against him, as if she were slowly catching on and aimed to please him with the torment she was giving him. She peered down at him mockingly through ocean blue eyes as his hands suddenly enveloped her own, stopping their movement at once with a plea of mercy. Her world swam dizzily in a mass of colors for a moment before feeling the feather light kisses he was giving her palm, causing small fires of desire to ignite her entire body. She looked up to see that he was progressively making his way up her arm and down to her bare chest, kneading and sucking on his destination as if his life depended on the way her nipples rivaled stone and the way her moans echoed across her own ears.
"God…"He continued his revenge, unaware of the word that unintentionally tumbled clumsily from his lips.
Her reaction was instantaneous. He could feel her body go rigid, her hands stopping all movement as her cerulean eyes met cloudy amber composed of swirling regret. The heat in her body slowed into an angry, rhythmic pounding against her wet chest, and her vision was now pulsating with a dim crimson.
He watched helplessly as she ripped herself from him, his only defenses were the apologies and excuses spilling like oxygen from his mouth. Her blows were relentless as she struck him repeatedly across his crestfallen face. Through his shameful eyes, he could see crystal like tears spill from her cerulean eyes as her naked body clamored out of his bed clumsily and she gave her back to him in response to his cries and pleas of forgiveness. It was only now that he could feel the warm wind from outside brush his bruised cheek, but he took no notice, for the overwhelming sense of dread, which engulfed his body, nearly made him completely oblivious.
"Kagome, I'm sorry! Kagome!"
Her back suddenly straightened and as she turned and faced him, her posture rigid with callousness, pitiful brown eyes bore into his, a frown fixated upon her pale face. Her straight brunette hair gleamed mockingly in the moonlight and he could feel his hand lower as his voice hoarsely whispered, "You're...not Kagome…"
She shook her head in a ghostly eerie manner, giving him another look of disappointment, her chocolate brown eyes glinting angrily in the moon's light. A cold chill ran up his spine at the contemptuous glare her brown eyes held for him as she spoke.
"You really can't decipher the two, can you, boy?" Her voice was that of a phantom's, haunting and heavy with burden as it drifted to his ears.
His body failed to comply with his demands of movement as she turned her back to him once again, her feet taking graceful, feather-like steps toward the balcony that seemed to have conjured right before them. Her dainty foot hovered on the edge, and he felt his body move with a familiar panic as he toppled out of bed and toward her.
"Wait, Kikyou!It was a mistake!" He cried desperately, groping for her but he failed to reach her slender form. The familiar pang of guilt in his heart seemed a little less than overwhelming as his body seemed to move in slow motion.
That was when she half turned to him, her nowblueeyes gleaming with glossy tears of angry malice and regret. "Wrong again, Inuyasha."
She seemed to float as she fell forward, her ebony hair billowing behind her as her body rushed toward the ground. That time, no ledge or movements of heroic intent could stop her body from unmercifully meeting the concrete pavement below.
Silvery hair plastered to a forehead filmed with sweat as ragged pants filled the air surrounding him, his own cries vividly echoing in his ears. Inuyasha looked around in bewilderment at the small room he was in, straightened himself from his slumped state, and cleared his throat as he sat up from his slumber. The afternoon sun filtered through the window in the far corner, giving the room an old incandescence that, along with the painful migraine he felt creeping upon him, made him feel even more worn out. He looked over to see Kagome slumbering peacefully under the comforters of her bed, and his heart lurched painfully before he looked away guiltily. As far as he was concerned, he didn't even have the right to look at her.
"That must have been one hell of a dream." Came from the unexpected voice of his best friend.
Inuyasha looked over to see Miroku leaning tiredly against the wall opposite him, grey smoke bleeding from his mouth and out the window beside him as he exhaled the fumes of his cigarette.
"Huh?" He replied automatically, cursing himself openly at his response. This would give Miroku room to pry, and remembering the blurry visions of his latest dream wasn't one of the things he wanted to do at that moment, especially not with the imagery still so vivid in his mind.
"Kagome, Kikyou! Kikyou, Kagome!" He chided childishly, although his face displayed in all seriousness, "What is that?"
Inuyasha looked away from him and out the window distractedly. "Nothing."
However, Miroku seemed far from finished. After all that had happened and not being able to talk to Inuyasha through any of the ordeal had him absolutely livid.
"Don't nothing me. Are you out of your fucking mind?" Tossing his fag out the window, he was across the room in three long strides, angrily knocking on the side of Inuyasha's head for emphasis.
Although surprised at Miroku's blatant approach, Inuyasha couldn't find it in himself to give a damn about his friend's anger. It wasn't as if he could do anything about it anyway.
Taking a lazy swing at him, he scowled and tried to bat his friend's hands away, "Fuck off, Roku. I don't need this right now."
However, what he didn't expect was the fist that connected with the side of his face, which sent him sprawling out on the floor with a painfully pulsating jaw to accompany him.
"You don't need this right now?! Well then, by all means, tell me when you do need it, because all I need is a reason, Inuyasha! A reason why you shouldn't be hurting as much as her!"
He looked up to a fuming Miroku in utter shock, wiping the blood of the side of his mouth as he followed his accusing finger to the still sleeping Kagome, whose full lips were sporting a small frown at the disturbance.
Soon enough, his shock merged into a full-blown guilt before a merciless anger swept over him. He had no reason to arouse such feelings in him, the bastard! He had no reason to be telling him the truth he already knew!
Jumping up to come his own defense, Inuyasha sent his fist into Miroku's jaw and watched in little satisfaction as he stumbled back from the blow. "I said fuck off! You don't know anything, you bastard! I don't have to answer to you, or anyone!" He shouted, and was willing to spout more curses, but Miroku cut him off as he tackled his tired form, and pinned him against the ground as unmerciful punches swept his face."That's the problem, you idiot! I know everything! Everything!" His punches were getting softer by the minute, but gods did they still hurt like hell. "You shot a man! Three bullets into his back, Inuyasha! What will people say now? Huh?"
Inuyasha's vision swam as Miroku continued to break down the walls of security he had placed around himself, releasing the torrents of self-contempt he had tried so hard to escape.
"It was fucking self defense…He shot me and Kagome… What else was I supposed to do?" He murmured weakly through his busted lip as the punches ceased.
Miroku, still pinning him, scoffed in disgust down at his best friend. "And Kagome? What of her? Was driving her off a building self defense too?"
Inuyasha's world spun horrifically fast before it slowed to a stop, mimicking the pained heart in his chest. At that moment, shame overwhelmed him, seeping into the dark recesses of his subconscious making it the only thing he saw, knew and breathed. His body shook with shuddering breaths as he knocked Miroku from atop him and scrambled away, only to be cornered by the wall behind him.
She fell…She could have died...
He did that. He was so consumed and engulfed in his infinite furor that all was lost to him whilst everything he knew and loved prior to that one, blood-boiling moment didn't matter when white-hot rage devoured his world.
He didn't even notice as his body gave way to a heavy tremor, his hands buried in his silvery hair. He hadn't really thought of it before, completely evading the subject in his mind until now.
Through his oblivious evasion, he hadn't noticed it until that point but now that he looked into the passed days' occurrences, he realized that Kagome's death could have been his absolute anguish.
The mere possibility was the cue for the scissors to cut the binds which held him to his world, and the thought shook him harder than anything else did. When had he become so dependent on her? Since when did he wait on her smile to brighten up his day, or for her tinkling laugh to ease his troubled mind? He now realized that he had come to rely on at least seeing her every day, or else his day would turn out wrong, and the thought of never having her–her presence– made the back of his eyes sting and his throat clog up with despair as he tried to voice his denial.
He needed to say something at that very moment as his nails raked over the wooden floor, leaving scraggly marks of his pain on the surface. Whether it was to the furious Miroku that stood over him, looking down on him, or to the unconscious woman a few feet from him, he needed to fuse his voice to words so that he could lie and deny to his callous mind that he hadn't...
"...almost killed her..." His voice cracked and wavered, which seemed to bring him from his stupor. He looked around in a daze before jumping to his feet and fleeing, unaware of the crystal blue eyes that followed him as he ran.
Kagome had been awake throughout the whole ordeal. Sleep had loosened its grip on her mind the moment Miroku's fist first met Inuyasha's jaw. Her body went into numb shock as she watched them fight, their fists colliding painfully with the other's faces. It was a horrid sight, watching two close friends fight in such a manner, but for some reason, she could not force her body to move from its spot and stop them before things got completely out of hand.Once Inuyasha's pained golden eyes flew to her, she forced her eyes shut and waited for their argument to resume. Once it did, she couldn't help but frown ruefully at the absolute contempt boiling inside of her at the memories Miroku dug up with his words. She remembered everything from that point on and even went so far as to reluctantly relive the past week's events.
She couldn't help but sit there and watch as Miroku graced Inuyasha's face with merciless blows that she wished she could–but couldn't–give him herself. She hated Inuyasha so much at that moment that when he scrambled into the corner and withdrew from himself, his body shuddering uncontrollably for reasons unknown, the satisfied smile that quirked her lips pleased her.
It was all she could do not to let out a haughty laugh of contempt once she fled from the room. Bile bubbled in her stomach as she fed off this hatred, but she ignored it. She bathed herself in this disdain for a while; relishing the fact, that maybe–just maybe–Inuyasha was finally perhaps feeling half the pain, the disorientation, the heart tearing, and soul consuming loneliness she felt when she had found out about his encounter with Kikyou.
She knew, damn her, that she had no right to relish in this contemptuous distaste for him when in rightful terms; he wasn't really hers to begin with. However, she despised him for so many more reasons at that point and the fact almost scared her. She hated the fact that whenever she closed her eyes, she would see the golden of his playfully mocking eyes staring back at her. She hated him so much for making her love him, when usually she would bask greedily in the ambiance of the thought.
But most of all, she hated the way she knew, deep down in the recesses of her soul, that he was still in love with Kikyou, and nothing could ever change that. And that was the reason why she couldn't help the sadistic looking smile that ghosted its way onto her face at the thought of him hurting at her expense. She deserved that much didn't she? To be actually be given a second thought by the one she loved, when she had sacrificed so much for him?
Hearing a faint rustle of movement from the far side of the room, Kagome looked over to see Miroku rise from his place on the floor and stand, his back facing her. She studied his rigid posture wearily for a few minutes before deciding that he had indeed calmed down and turned her eyes out to the window uninterestingly.
She could tell by the suffocating shroud of discomfort lingering around them that he knew she was awake, but until he acknowledged it, Kagome decided to feign disinterest as she gazed out the window towards a wilting sakura tree that was shadowed by the clouds outside. After all, the pervert he may be, Miroku had always had a way with words. Waiting patiently for him to gather himself, Kagome twiddled with her fingernails under the covers while simultaneously watching the once pink petals on the tree tremble weakly in the wind before breaking off the branch and slowly fluttering to the ground.
Her eyes seemed to fixate on it as more brown leaves near the bottom of the tree flittered before breaking off and falling to the ground. It was like watching someone weep helplessly, the sunburned leaves like tears of sorrow as they rained steadily from the tree to the ground.
Her heart clenched at this thought and she felt her own tears prick at the back of her eyeballs. Her fists clenched the comforter until the pinnacle of her knuckles bleached themselves stark white, her bottom lip caught in the grip of her teeth as she willed herself not to shed any more tears. She was so in love it hurt. Every beat of her heart seemed to be like a painful drum, relentlessly beating at her rib cage as the emotions he caused welled up inside of her. Never in a million years would she think love would be this hurtful, this unmerciful and at the same time, she knew that her still lingering contempt for him would be her undoing. If in the beginning she knew that falling in love with this man would hurt so much, she would have never given him the chance to trip her in the first place.
A bitter laugh escaped her lips. Oh, the irony…
She used the word as if it just as simple as air and water. It was ridiculous really, seeing as her past so called 'love' was now locked away in a jail cell, never to see the light of day again and all she could focus on was the way this boy, with eyes of glistening gold and hair of sparkling silver that entranced her so deeply. A sour look sprang to her face. Funny, she was actually starting to feel guilty just then.
Her hands wrung themselves ragged as she noticed the air around them getting thicker and thicker with a tension that now almost seemed suffocating. Kagome was growing weary of it as Miroku only stood there, mimicking a statue as he stared at the door Inuyasha had fled through only moments before.
"Miroku?" She coaxed hoarsely.
A scowl found its way to her mouth at his stubbornness. Why couldn't he just come out with it already? Was he afraid? Kagome's eyebrows knitted together as her frown tugged insistently at her face. Well, for what ever reason why he was standing there so quietly, be it that he was afraid, unsure of what to say, or that he just wanted to watch the paint chip away on the walls, she couldn't take the tension any longer. Suddenly the idea of crying her heart out onto Sango's shoulder sounded tempting…
Slowly sliding from her covers with small grunt of pain, she started to make her way out of her bed. That was when he said it. His voice was barely above a whisper and slightly shaken, but she heard just as clear as if he had shouted it and her body froze all the same.
"You hate him, don't you?"
Her face paled a little shade lighter than what its sickly hue took on, so when she slowly eased her way back on the bed, she looked as if any moment she could take her last breath, and she didn't doubt that she might. Not giving herself enough time to contemplate his answer, being that her mind was set on its overwhelming contempt, the words slipped from her lips almost unintentionally.
"Yeah. I do."
Miroku let out a pained chuckle, one that sounded defeated and exhausted from being tossed around so unmercifully by the taunting hands of irony. Kagome's mouth fumbled with something else to say, something to justify why her thoughts had become her words, because up until she had said anything, her hate spoken aloud hadn't sounded quite so...harsh inside her head.
"Still love him, don't you?" His tone was skittish and unwavering, almost as if he already knew the answer.
Kagome, too, knew the answer and with a rueful, almost lamenting smile playing at her lips, she stared at Miroku's back. He never turned around, but it seemed just by being near her he knew all the answers to the maelstrom of thoughts that jumbled in her head a few minutes prior.
"Damn you Miroku," She said as a cough escaped her lips before she spoke again, "Who taught you how to be so fucking perceptive?"
She could practically see the smile that tugged at his face from staring at the back of his head. He shrugged in a nonchalant way, even though the conversation in itself seemed to be the most uncomfortable thing for him right then.
"It's written all over your face, kid."
Kagome on the other hand didn't appreciate his smugness when it came to things so precious to her such as her inner thoughts and feelings, so with a very unladylike snort, she turned away from him stubbornly.
"Yeah. So? What do you know, anyway?" Her voice was a little sharper than intended, reminding her of a certain silver haired teen who lost his temper way too often.
"Nothing, really." He shrugged again, bothering her to no end. "You love him, you hate him. What can you really do?"
Kagome winced at his use of the 'L' word so openly, but brushed it off as she pointed her nose into the air snobbily. "Forget him, I say."
Miroku chuckled again, this time without any underlying sense of smug knowledge lacing his tone, causing a small pout to form on Kagome's face.
"Hey, what's so funny?" She demanded sourly.
"Nothing, nothing!" He protested, holding his hands up in the air defensively, "I see where you're coming from. Really, I do!"
Kagome tilted her head to the side in mild curiosity. "You do?"
"Oh, of course!" He answered, nodding. "Who would want to be with such a jerk as Inuyasha?" Kagome winced. "I mean, he's loud, obnoxious, overbearing, and let's not even start on his manners!"
Although his words stuck a guilty thorn in her side, she had to agree. Inuyasha was a bit too loud and rude at times that didn't even call for it. She lowered her eyes as she verbally agreed with Miroku, however, that was what made him...him.
"And what girl would want a guy as jealous as him?" Miroku continued, finally turning around to face her, "I mean, come on! Who would care that much to go on a raging pout about a hug?"
Kagome faltered. "He's not that jealous. He just worries about me…" She protested, but she knew her defense was weak. Miroku didn't know, but she kind of liked it when Inuyasha got jealous from time to time. It sort of showed her that he still cared.
However, Miroku didn't seem to hear her, too caught up in his own rants and ravings. "And since you're so intent on forgetting him, it'll be heaven to forget about the way he holds you when you cry, won't it? I mean, who wants their space invaded like that when you're in such a vulnerable state?" He stated matter of factly, giving a pointed look as if he expected her to agree.
Although she didn't know how in the world he would possibly know such a thing, she let the thought slip. "Well, I don't really mind when he holds me, you know." A small blush rose to her cheeks, "He smells kind of nice...For a jerk, I mean."
Kagome looked down the comforters of her bed, seeming to not remember why she was so angry with him in the first place. Was it just that simple, to just let her anger slip from her memory like it had? 'No, no…' She thought, 'I'm just making excuses for myself. I really don't want to forgive him, do I?'
"And another thing!" he continued, "The way he talks about you all the time!"
"He…he talks about me?" Kagome stuttered, disbelief lacing her words.
"Oh yeah!" He exclaimed, nodding, "'Kagome this!', 'Kagome that!' The guys get kind of sick of it, you know. And I'm sure you wouldn't want to be talked so highly of all the time, would you? Seems kind of obsessive, if you ask me."
Kagome's head suddenly felt light. Now that she thought about it, the things Inuyasha did weren't so bad. She kind of liked the way he acted. They were the things that made up the character she grew to love. In fact, before the incident at the hospital, she didn't really remember having a problem with the way he acted, excluding the constant arguments they had.
Her thoughts jumbled on as Miroku continued to rant. Maybe it was all selfish of her to feel the way she did? 'No!You have every right to be angry!' Her mind chastised, fighting with the guilt that rose within her stomach.
She bit her lower lip as she struggled internally with her thoughts. Did she really have the right to be mad and try to deny him his last moments to his past love? Even if jealousy arose in her that extended to no end, what made her think she had the right to deny him something so special? Her heart dropped into stomach.
She was monster! So consumed in how she felt about the whole ordeal that she never once stopped to remember that he too was a human with feelings, probably much like her own. She was pretty sure he was hurting, by the way he had treated his best friend and caught up in her own self pity and contempt, she had completely disregarded his feelings! She felt horrible.
By the time it had taken her to come to this revelation, Miroku must have noticed that she wasn't listening because when she brought herself from her thoughts, he stood waving his hand in her face to catch her attention.
"Hellooo, Kagome! You agree with me, don't you?"
"Um…Yeah. Whatever you say, Miroku." She said, feigning her answer as if she had really been listening while she eased herself from the bed. However, by the surprised look that covered his face she wondered if that had been the right thing to say.
"Why, Kagome! I never thought you were that type of lady!" He exclaimed, clearly appalled.
She frowned. 'Glad I wasn't paying much attention to the pervert. I might have actually had to hit him if I'd heard him…' She shook her head and stood from the bed, the pain searing throughout her entire body was apparent. 'Damn this…God, the pain I go through for that bastard.'
"Kagome, you seem to be in pain," Miroku inquired, noticing the scowl on her face, "Shouldn't you rest more?"
Although the idea seemed very tempting to her, she had to shake her head and grit her teeth. If she wanted to make some kind of amends, it wouldn't be done lying down. "I'm just going to go for a walk.." Then, an idea sprang to her head, "Mind if I borrow your car?"
Miroku pulled a puzzled look as he reluctantly pulled his keys from his pocket. "Sure...but wouldn't that kinda defeat the purpose of a 'walk'?"
Kagome would have surely giggled, if she were sure her body wouldn't have exploded in pain at the effort. She mustered a smile instead as she swiped his keys before he could change his mind.
"Ah, ever the perceptive one, aren't you Roku?" She said, tweaking his nose playfully, "Keep that up. Might do something for you one day." She smiled again. Funny what a paradigm shift could do to one's attitude.
As she limped her way to the door, she could hear his reminder as she left. "Don't forget what I told you, Kagome!"
A smiled drifted to her face. 'I won't, Miroku, I won't.'
A teenage boy with eyes of gold sat staring at the angry, crashing waves of the sea as they unrelentingly rammed against the rocky shores below the pier on which he stood. Said golden eyes looked–to the trained eye–like murky puddles of liquid on the front of his face. Their depths were tainted with a grueling pain that stretched across his usually handsome features, the effects of his turmoil seeming infinite with the way his shoulders slumped forward and his throat clogged up with God knows what.
However, he seemed grateful for that God knew that, seeing as it was the only thing keeping the unshed tears in his eyes from spilling over. His hands grasped the wooden railing angrily for the umpteenth time as his thoughts drifted back down the same road…about her.
"Inuyasha, do you always have to make that face?" Kagome's shrill voice scolded him, as she tugged him towards the perfume store, "Try to be nice one in a while, please? Not everyone bites, you know."
Then she smiled. Not mischievous or flirtatious smile, but a simple one, used merely to coax him into relaxing so that his behavior was presentable in front of others. However, at that moment, he saw it as so much more. That simple smile was dazzling and beautiful and it had nothing to do with the way her white teeth sparkled. Things of that sort were beginning to be trivial to him. No, they were those things because it was her.
It was Kagome.
Inuyasha thought back to that day and realized that was when she began to influence changes within him, with her kind gestures and sweet smiles. Why had it taken all those years for him to notice how wonderful a person she is?
'Because I was too busy being an asshole, that's why.' He thought sourly. It had taken him so long to warm up to her kindness; he was surprised she had put up with him for so long. But Kagome was perfect, and she would do anything for him not to tarnish that perfection. For that reason, he felt ashamed.
It was a quiet afternoon after school when Inuyasha and Kagome were walking through the many outside hallways of their high school on their way to the school parking lot, neither wanting to say anything to the other for fear of starting another argument. Kagome seemed in a particular happy mood for some reason that day, something that easily annoyed Inuyasha, so she kept quiet for the time being.
As she bounced along, she looked up to catch eye of a spider web that seemed to glisten in the sun's light. She then gasped, causing both teens to stop, as a butterfly fluttered unknowingly into the beautiful entanglement.
"What?" Inuyasha inquired, clearly uninterested." It's just a stupid butterfly."
"But…it's stuck." She watched it writhe helplessly, trying to free itself as the owner of the web peaked out from some crevice and began to slowly make its way to it's prey. Inuyasha gave a gruff sigh of annoyance as he watched her approach the web and lift her hand, in an attempt to save the poor victim.
"Leave it alone, Kagome." Came Inuyasha's solemn tone. "Just let it die."
Kagome turned to him and made a face. "No! It'll be eaten! I'm not gonna just sit back and watch this poor creature die!"
Inuyasha rolled his eyes again. He couldn't believe he was having this conversation with her, let alone arguing with her about it. He could see that she had a bit of a childish mind, with childish antics to suit it, but they were just some stupid bugs, doing what bugs did all the time; eat and get eaten. Why couldn't she see that?
"It's the way the world works, Kagome." He said approaching her, and gently pulling her hand down from the web, "Something has to die in order for another to live."
Kagome looked surprised that he had come up with that himself, and actually looked back to make sure he wasn't reciting it from a book or something. He couldn't blame her, however, he couldn't believe he had said it, either. The gentleness in his tone also surprised him.
She then looked into his eyes with a sad, forlorn look across her face. A mood that was in complete contrast to just five minutes prior. "But…I don't think it's time for it to die, do you?" She sounded like a curious child asking her parent why the sky was blue.
Inuyasha shook his head, fed up with the conversation. Frankly, he was just not much into her innocent, juvenile act. "I don't really care. If you save the stupid thing, the spider will die of starvation. You want that?"
Kagome looked back up to the web and then down to her feet before shaking her head. "I didn't think so. Now, come on."
Inuyasha didn't know why he chose that particular memory to relive, but as he looked back on it, he could now smile at the kind heart she possessed that he once mistook for a naive idiocy about the world around her.
He had been wrong, once he walked away that day, thinking about just how petty the girl following him could be. And if his memory served him right, the way she lost the bounce in her step and pep in her voice pleased him. He had never been one for pleasant, happy things back then.
Now, he didn't think that he could live without her bright personality and kindness beside him. He barely remembered what life was like before he was exposed to her light. And the thought that he had almost put out that light permanently caused his eyes to sting even more, a lone tear escaping them and slipping down his face. He wiped the wetness from his face angrily before leaning against the railing once again. But despite being the brightest illumine in his life, she wasn't always the only one...
"Inuyasha, what does the sun look like to you?"
Golden eyes shifted to the girl–no, woman–he cradled so dearly in his lap to see her staring intently at the orange and red sky that hovered over their heads caused by the receding sun. The clouds appeared to be a bright orange while the sun itself looked to be a deep crimson circle in the middle of the sky.
A muscle twitched in his lips as he shrugged. They had been sitting atop an old warehouse for hours now, Kikyo nestled comfortably in between his legs, her head resting in the crook of his neck as he looked to the sky.
"I don't know…The sun?" He replied, lacking the imagination to come up with a better response. His lips quirked in a smile at her chuckle.
"Ever the creative one, aren't you, Inuyasha?" She teased.
"Yeah, yeah Picasso. What does it look like to you then?" He asked gently, reaching down to lace his fingers with hers. She released a sigh and buried herself closer to him.
"It looks like…" She bit her lip in contemplation. "Like a jewel that was once beautiful and vibrant."
Inuyasha decided to play along. "So…what happened to the jewel?"
Kikyo continued to look up at the sun that was steadily descending farther and farther into the sky in thought. "It's tainted," She finally answered, "With something wicked; blood, maybe. What do you think?"
Inuyasha untangled his hand from her grasp to wipe his bangs from his eyes before returning them to hers. He shrugged, figuring it was an odd thought and maybe a little morbid, but as long as he had known her, Kikyou had always seemed to be that way.
They sat in silence for another long hour and watched as the sun was swallowed up by the horizon, engulfing Tokyo in darkness. They were now staring at the stars and the silence stretched on comfortably before Inuyasha spoke.
"Kikyou, how long do you want us to be together?" It sounded like an odd question out loud, but he felt comfortable asking her since he knew she would tell him the truth. Her grip on his hand tightened.
"A long while, I suppose. Why do you ask?" She questioned softly.
"Oh, I dunno. Just a thought. What ever happened to forever?" He asked, somewhat amused and pleased by her answer. She reached up to touch his cheek softly before laughing in a sort of ironic way.
"There's no such thing as a forever, Inuyasha."
A callous laugh tore through his lips. Forever, what an insolent and perfect word. There was really no way to describe what 'forever' meant, but it was a word he shared for both women. He expected forever from Kikyou, and needed it from Kagome. He closed his eyes for moment and sighed as the self-contempt rose up in his throat. He was in love with sisters.
How pathetic was that?
It was twisted the way the world had become, when a man had to choose to be with one girl or her sister, however, Inuyasha couldn't help it. Kikyou was his strength, his weakness, and his reality. For so long she had been his everything, that he just couldn't–he wouldn't–ever imagine her being nothing.
Kagome, on the other hand, was his new love. His true love. She was his brightness in the dark and the shining hope in his pain. She was his reason to smile and be happy, even though he knew he deserved to do neither.
Both women meant so much to him, yet he couldn't protect either one from their almost untimely...he refused to think it. If Inuyasha had not focused on the revenge he wanted so bad from Kouga, he would have recognized the screams back at the warehouse and probably had a chance at helping Kikyou.
And Kagome...the memory was too fresh in his head to even think of. The thought of reliving something so horrible caused his eyes to burn. He damned himself for being so weak, so pathetic and unworthy.
He loved both women, but deserved neither.
He was too consumed in his self-pity to notice the small pitter of steps as they grew closer to him. So enthralled in an all-consuming hatred that when they stopped next to him he hadn't even noticed she was there until she muttered one word, "Hey."
His eyes flickered to her azure orbs staring kindly up at him and his heart skipped a beat. As if to make up for that skipped beat, it began to thunder painfully against his chest and unconsciously, he stepped away from her. No pain flickered across her face from his action, nor did she step closer. She just stood there, that dazzling smile on her face as she looked at him. Her skin seemed to be a little pale, but her body glowed with a radiance he didn't know a person who had just brushed death could possess.
"K-Kagome?" He choked out, his voice sounding hoarse and weak to his own ears.
She giggled behind her hand, a tinkling, childish sound that seemed to make him wake up from a long time nightmare, "The one and only!"
He looked away, not able to stare into a face that held so much happiness and love for him. He didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve the happiness, the love, nothing! He deserved none of it! His face hardened as he returned to his position of staring at the ocean below, trying his hardest to believe that she wasn't there. "Go away."
He saw the perplexed look cross her face mingled with the mild sting of pain he knew she felt at his words, but he didn't care. Leaving him would be for her own damn good. Even if it meant his own demise. He tensed as he felt her light touch on his arm and swallowed his tongue as the appendage tingled delightfully from the contact. He clenched his teeth in blissful agony before ripping his arm from her grasp as if she burned. "I said go away!"
She stumbled back and fell onto her bottom with a surprised look, the tears automatically springing to her wide eyes. Inuyasha could only hate himself even more as he stared down at her prone form. She didn't deserve this. She deserved better. Even though he who could buy her wildest dreams of cars, houses, and jewelry, he was so wrong for her, couldn't she see that?
"Leave, you stupid girl!" He shouted, noticing that she had opened her mouth to speak. He wouldn't let her. He wasn't worthy of her words. "What don't you get!?"
She bit her lip as she came slowly to her feet. Inuyasha noticed the way her fragile body moved and wanted so desperately to reach out and assist her, but against his better judgment, he held his resolve.
"You want what?" He seethed, his heart tearing into pieces as he spoke. The pain was something akin to excruciating, but he needed to do this. "To be with me?"
A look of recognition passed over her face, causing a cruel laugh to spill from his lips, "Get in line, wench. You ain't the only one."
Her face fell, and it seemed as what little color she had on her drained at that very moment. Her knees began to wobble, and she gripped the railing to keep her balance as tortured blue eyes bared into his soul. His arms itched to hold and comfort her, but his mind screamed not to for the sake of her future well-being. They needed this.
"Inuyasha, what's wrong with you?" She asked meekly, tucking a wisp of hair away from her face. Her bottom lip trembled as she tried desperately not to let unshed tears fall. She looked so weak and fragile; Inuyasha could only hope that she would find someone to make her happy after she left him.
"I'm tired of you, that's what!" A deeper sadness printed itself on her face.
"I'm tired of looking at your face!," 'Because it makes me smile.' "I'm tired of you smiling about any and everything!," 'cuz it makes my day when you do.' "And most of all, I'm tired of being with you!," 'Even though you complete me.'
The tears that leaked down her face in a steady flow didn't hinder him from shouting his next words, "It would be better for us both if you just got lost!"
Up until that moment, Inuyasha hadn't even noticed the tears caused by self hatred clouding his eyes until her hand connected painfully with the side of his face, causing them to spill and fall onto the ground.
"Shut up! Just shut up!" He looked back to her in what he believed was complete awe as she clenched her eyes shut and screamed lividly, her whole face red from the exertion, "Don't tell me what's good or better for me! I know what I want! And that's you, idiot!"
She stepped closer, her voice rising to an impossible volume as she continued her tirade, "I know what you're trying to do, and it won't work! Have you at least stopped to think about what I want at all?!"
His eyes widened at the realization that he hadn't. But so what? What she wanted was something that not even his endless expanse of money and wealth could give her. She wanted–deserved–undivided love and attention, and even though he loved her with all his being, that was just something he couldn't give her. Why couldn't the stupid girl get that?
"Pull your head out of your ass, Kagome!" He shouted as guilt quickly mingled with anger. "What you want is trivial! It doesn't matter! You and me are two different people! It can't be the way you want it to be! This isn't some fucking fairytale, okay?!"
Kagome choked on her sobs as her furious eyes danced across his face, searching for something he didn't quite understand. "Idiot," she growled, "What makes you think I want a fairytale, huh?"
He opened his mouth to retort, when she cut him off. "Well, I don't want one! I like our relationship, dammit! I like the twisted way you make me feel and the way we argue about any and everything! It's you that I love, stupid! " She screamed as if he didn't get the point, "You, you, you! Why can't you get that?! "
Inuyasha visibly seethed. His anger boiled into rage. He exploded.
"Because, you stupid girl, I'm in love with your fucking sister!"
The world stopped. The birds that endured the loud noise they were making prior to that moment fluttered away and with the way no cars or people littered the nearby streets, it gave a chance to hear how the sea had calmed up to that point, almost as if everything came to a stop to listen to Kagome's response.
His heart froze.
Her heart broke.
Then, she let out an ironic chuckle, a foreign sound that made chills run up his spine. It wasn't a Kagome-like laugh. It was cold and void of emotion. Why was she laughing anyway? She reached forward and Inuyasha, too shocked to register what she was doing, didn't even pull away as she laced her fingers with his.
She raised her eyes to look at him and if weren't for the way his throat closed up, he would have gasped at how her eyes gleamed against the afternoon sunlight as a smile adorned her face. He took notice when she stepped closer to him, that the dried tears under her eyes did nothing to take away from her beauty at that moment. If anything, it added to it because it made her all the more realistic to him. Up until this point, his mind had been telling him that it all was just some twisted nightmare that he had yet to wake up from.
"I love you, Inuyasha, you know that don't you?" She asked, her voice barely a whisper. They were so close that her breath wisped against his lips, causing a longing to bubble up within him.
He didn't respond and she seemed not to care. "It took me a while to realize what this felling I've been having is, and when I figured it out, I was mad." She laughed a little.
"Beyond mad, actually. I hated you, more then I've hated anyone in my entire life. More than you hate me right now." He winced. "I wanted you out of my life. I wanted you gone, dead, anything that came to mind that would rid me of you was fine with me."
His heart clenched painfully in his chest as he looked down at their entwined hands. Her words were cutting deeper into him than he'd ever admit. But this is what he wanted, right? Her hate and despite towards him? He just never thought he would hurt this much. Death had nothing on this feeling.
"But then I realized it was kind of weird, just all of a sudden that I came to this realization. I really can't imagine me without you by my side, yelling and telling me how stupid I am half the time." She laughed again and he gulped, his heart thundering so loudly against his chest he was surprised she didn't hear it. Hell, she probably did.
"But its things like that that made me realize I'm just so in love with you. It took me forever to sort these feelings out, and it was kind of confusing when I did it by myself." She squeezed his hand gently, and smiled a little more when it unconsciously wrapped around hers.
"So what I'm asking is this," She took a deep breath, "Will you let me stay with you? Can I help you get through this?"
Inuyasha bit his bottom lip as he looked down to her. "Kagome, I…" '…love you, too.'
"And once you're done, if you want me gone, I won't hesitate to hop on the next airplane to China. All you have to do is say the word."
He couldn't bare it anymore. His voice had long ago died in his throat, but he didn't need it. No, words were never enough to him. He pulled her to him, crushing her body against his and burying his face in the crook of her neck. He could feel her tears wet his chest as she clung to him desperately, crying softly into his chest. "I'm not saying fall in love with me or anything. Just let me be with you for right now. Is that too much to ask?"
He shook his head, as he pressed her small body closer to his, as if that were possible. He cared for her so much at that moment, that he wasn't sure that love was an extensive enough word to cover it all. As mentioned before, she was his light, his happiness. She was the sun that kissed his skin and the breath that danced on his lips.
He didn't know what he was thinking before, but now was a moment that would stay with him forever, and he hoped just like this moment, that Kagome would do the same. He just couldn't imagine her gone, and he was glad she was just too damn stubborn to heed his earlier words, because he still hated himself for them. And that's why she was there. To help him live, and make him feel alive again.
However, one thing she didn't truly realize was that she was his life, and nothing could ever change that. "Stupid girl," He muttered, tangling his fingers in her hair as he pulled her face back so that she could stare at her, "You never listen, do you?"
His lips brushed her swollen ones in a sweet kiss before he took her hand in his, entwining their fingers. For once, he would be selfish. And despite the consequences, just this once, he would do something that made him happy, without thoughts of anyone else.