Episode One: Riley's Demise
Rating: PG (The word damn once or twice.. that's 'bout it)
Disclaim & Intro: Are you kidding? Me own Buffy? Nope, don't own it! I also do not own Burger King..
I only know about the series because my sister is an obsessed Buffy fan. She influenced me to write a Buffy fan fic one day when I was bored.. so I thought, what the heck. But where was I supposed to start? Why not include my favorite character (WILLOW!) and find a way to get rid of my least favorite character (RILEY: ICK!).
So that led to my little Willow series.. yes, a series. I'll be writing a few more episodes when I get some more ideas. Until then, enjoy Episode One of Willow's Witchcraft: Riley's Demise.
PS- Some of the character's personalities have changed. Willow might not like frogs on the show, but she likes them in the fic ^_^
One day, Willow and Buffy were.. well, what else? Looking for trouble. [What else are they ever doing?] In the graveyard, at the school, at the local Burger King dumpster : they checked out the usual hangouts. Still, no demons to be slayed. Or vampires to be staked. Whatever. You get the idea.
"I'm bored, Buffy! Come on: Looking for demons and vampires and stuff in the middle of the night? Inviting near and/or sudden death? Your job sucks!" Willow complained. She turned her head to make a face at Buffy, but screamed as something moved in some nearby bushes.
Buffy walked over to the bushes and calmly picked up the puppy that was cowering in there. [Aww!] "Willow! I'm a Slayer! This is my, like, job and all.." but even Buffy felt that she needed a promotion. Finding lost puppies didn't fit her job description. Buffy left it there.
"I don't like all this killing. It's depressing." Willow put on her sad face. Even Buffy couldn't say no.
"All right, let's take a break. What do you suggest?"
"How about a séance?"
"You want to summon demons in the safety of your home instead of staying out here and having much better chances?" Buffy was aghast. What was Willow thinking? [When does Willow ever think things out?]
"No, no, we could summon.. friendly ghosts or happy ghouls or something.. nothing that thirsts for blood, promise! Please?" Willow begged. Her eyes were lined with near tears. [Emotional girl, that Willow!]
Buffy considered. "How can I turn down friendly ghosts and happy ghouls?"
"Great!" Willow smiled. She picked up the lost puppy, looked him in the eyes, and he disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"Umm.. Willow.. don't do that in public anymore, okay?"
"Huh? Oh, sure!"
~At the Séance~
Buffy, Willow, and Xander [I am DYING to type Zander] sat down. Xander looked uneasy. After all, this was stake-happy Buffy and magic-spelly Willow he was hanging out with. He looked over at the various magical objects Willow was setting down: spell book, candles, twinkies.
Twinkies? Xander hesitated. "Are you sure you now what you're doing?"
Buffy looked up. "Where did you come from, Xander?"
Xander blinked. "You invited me.. remember?"
"Oh yeah." [All those hits she takes are finally showing results.]
Willow rolled her eyes. "I'm ready, you two."
"But why.. Twinkies?"
Willow grinned. "Even witches get hungry. Now let's start."
Xander stopped her from beginning the séance. "Why did you invite me here again? I don't want to be here while you guys summon dead guys."
Willow glared. "You'll be a dead guy if you don't participate."
Xander decided to join in after all. Everyone prepared to hold hands. But he looked questionably over at Buffy.
"We wanted you here in case we summoned something bad.. you're a good distraction," she whispered.
"Umm.. Okay.. Fine with me.. eh heh," Xander reluctantly held out his hands. Buffy and Willow held out theirs and soon everyone was concentrating very hard. Willow chanted:
We would like to form a connection.
Send us a guide,
Show us a sign,
Show us.. SOMETHING.. dammit.. " Willow's voice trailed off.
"So?" Xander whispered.
"I think I've got somebody-" Willow closed her eyes and continued chanting. "Yep, I found something.. Hold on..
I've found a guide,
Let us speak to him--" Willow was interrupted when a big cloud of grey smoke filled the air. A scary demon glowered at all of them. [There are so many damn demons on the show.. just pick one, alright??"]
~The New Spell~
"Ah!" Willow snapped out of the trance.
"I'll get it!" Buffy shouted. She grabbed a pen from Xander's breast pocket and ran after the demon.
"Umm... Buffy? Give me that pen when you're done with it. I have a test tomorrow.."
"No, Buffy! That's our guide! Metaprophomise!" she called out. The scary demon turned into a kitten.
The kitty/demon looked up, confused. "Me.. Meow?"
"How cute!" Xander picked it up and cuddled it. "Can I keep it?"
"Xander!" Willow whacked him on the head with her magic wand. [She has one now, okay?!]
"What did I do?" he whined.
"I've never used that spell before! I read about it in one of Giles's books yesterday, but I never had a chance to use it on anything. I usually only make animals disappear-"
"I know," Buffy nodded. "Just like that puppy."
"That's right, Buffy! And.." Willow grinned. "I summoned the demon and turned him into a cat.. I wanna keep him!"
"No way! Get your own kitty/demon thing!" Xander held the cat tightly.
"What?!" Willow's patience had been tested.. and Willow doesn't have much patience. She called out "Metaprophomise!" and ..
"Ribbit!" Xander was a little green poison dart frog. He glared at Willow with his beady froggy eyes.
"How cute!" Willow smiled. "He can keep my kitty/demon company!"
"Turn him back, Will. We're not going to turn all of our friends into animals just because they're so much cooler that way."
"Riiiibbit!" the Xander frog said growled with his froggy vocal cords.
"But he's so much cuter now!" Willow put on her sad face.
"No, now," Buffy shook her head. She wouldn't give in to Willow's sad face right now. "I don't mind if you turn demons into kitties.. Just leave our friends out of it."
"Alright, alright," Willow called out the magic word, and Xander was human again.
"That was SO not cool!" he glared at Willow.
"Sorry!" but Willow couldn't stop the grin.
An goofy voice came out of nowhere and filled the room. "Aww, lookit that adorable kitty!"
"Oh.. look. It's Riley.." Buffy said unenthusiastically.
Willow made a face behind Riley's back, making Xander giggle. [I'm going to play around with Riley before finishing him off ^_~]
"So who's cat is this?" Riley asked? He picked up the kitten/demon.
Willow grinned at the opportunity to hurt Riley. "Metaprophomise!" she muttered under her breath.
The kitten turned back into the demon. Back into a heavy demon. Poor Riley was squished under the demon's weight.
"B-Buffy?" Riley choked out. "A little help here?"
"Sure.. Riley.. Just hold on.." Buffy groaned silently. What had she ever seen in this guy? She looked over at Willow. She and Xander were having a riot over this. Xander was clutching his chest, aching with laughter. Willow was in no better state.
"Willow!" Buffy hissed. "I do not appreciate having a demon in my living room!"
"Alright, alright," Willow sighed. "Dispartose," she called out, and the demon disappeared. [Count on Buffy to ruin Willow's fun! I'll get her in the next episode ^_~]
Riley gagged and tried to sit up. "A little help, please, Buffy?"
"Oh.. sure," Buffy grabbed him by the arm and hastily pulled him up.
"Where'd that demon come from?" Riley wore his best fishy face.
"Well, Riley," Willow smiled innocently. [Yay, Willow's planning some more fun!] "He's a distant relative of the Easter Bunny. He was paying Buffy a visit because she hasn't paid her income taxes."
"I knew there was something suspicious of that Easter Bunny! Figures his relatives would be demons!" Riley exclaimed, totally believing Willow's story.
Buffy rolled her eyes. "Me too, Riley... So what are you here for?"
Riley gave her a fishy grin. [Everyone calls him fish boy, so I gave him fish features] "Well, I have the night off.. it looks like you do too. Why don't we go off to a nice quiet place and-"
Buffy gave a look of pure disgust. "Willow, do something!"
[What else?] "Metaprophomise!"
A fish flopped around Buffy's living room.
"Eww, he's gonna make a mess!" Buffy exclaimed. "Mom will kill me if he ruins the carpet!"
Xander grinned. "How'd you choose a fish, Willow?"
Willow grinned back. "Somebody with such a goofy fish grin deserves a fish fate."
Buffy cringed. "He's even worse this way!" [Is that possible?]
Xander nodded. "Turn him back."
Buffy winced. "On second thought.. I like him better as a fish."
"Aww, look! He's trying to escape!" Willow smiled at the Riley fish's attempt to flop towards the door.
"What if his loser military friends find him?" Buffy was uneasy.
"Hopefully, he'll shrivel up and die before anybody notices anything," Xander pointed out.
"Nevermind, just turn him back into Riley, then transport him back to those loser friends," Buffy decided. [Dear god, no!]
"Fine, fine," Willow got ready to say the spell.
Suddenly, the door swung open. A loud squish filled the air, followed by a thick British accent.
"Eww, what in bloody hell was that?" Spike looked at the fish stain on the ground.
Buffy, Xander, and Willow grinned. [Count on Spike to save the day!]
"I knew he was a great guy, deep inside," Willow said matter-of-factly.
So Riley died in his true form.. and by Spike stepping on him.. I love that spike ^_^
And if you happened to ab-so-lut-ely HATE this fan fic.. well, geez! This 'ere's my first Buffy one O_o Alright?! ~Aelice