Disclaimer - I own nobody.. But I really wish I did...
Characters - Various WWE Characters (too many to name)
Summary - The WWE Superstars and Divas are forced to go to "Camp WWE". Amongst these men and women are rivals, exlovers, and even friends. Some new romances are formed while old one's are started back up…
In their overall opinion, they were on the shittiest bus to ever be made, or used. The bus went up and down as if the tires were all flat.
"Vince Mc-McMahon... That fu-fucking cheap ass-assclowns..." Chris mumbled as the bus went over yet another bump.
"Wh-what else di-did you expect?" Jason asked before the bus came to a halting stop.
Everyone on the bus jerked forward and hit their face on the seat before them.
"Oww! My nose!" Hunter exclaimed as he put a hand to his face.
"Well that's what you get for having a big nose!" Chris sneered.
"Shut it jerky!" Hunter demanded as Chris rolled his eyes.
Stacy leaned back in her seat and glared at the woman she was forced to share a seat with.
"Are you okay?" Stacy asked.
"Why do you care?" Molly snapped.
"Hey, where are we?" Maven asked as he got out of his seat.
"I think one of the tires is flat." The bus driver replied in a redneck tone.
"No, I think it was flat before we even left..." Randy argued.
"Well duh it was flat! It drives better when a few tires are flat..." The bus driver informed him.
"Then what's the deal? Why'd we stop?" Ric asked as he got off the seat he was sharing with Hunter.
"I think we outta gas..." The bus driver stated.
"Is the tire flat or are we out of gas? Which is it?" Adam questioned.
"Girlfriend stealer..." Matt mumbled with a cough.
"Man, are you okay?" Kerwin asked as he patted Matt on the back.
"Get your hands off of me!" Matt ordered as he slapped Kerwin away.
"What he doing?" Tajiri asked William and Eugene.
"He... He... He sick..." Eugene replied before putting his finger in his mouth as if to think.
"No, he's angry at Adam, Eugene..." William corrected.
"For... For what?" Eugene asked.
"I don't know, lad... You ask Matt." William said as he gestured to where Matt was sitting.
Eugene got up and walked up to who he thought was Matt.
"Why... Why are you mad at Adam?" Eugene asked.
"I am not mad at Adam!" Kurt protested.
"Oh... Sorry Kurt... I thought... I thought you were Matt." Eugene replied as Kurt gave him a dirty look.
"How could you say that Eugene? You of all people! Matt has long hair..." Kurt declared before Eugene walked away.
"Why are you mad at... at Adam?" Eugene asked.
"I am Adam..." Adam stated as he looked at Eugene blankly.
"Oh, I thought you were... Ah, Matt." Eugene said.
"NO! Matt has on a black t-shirt." Adam replied.
Once again, Eugene walked up to another superstar.
"Why are... Are you mad at Adam?" Eugene asked.
"Cause he's a pussy..." Austin hissed.
"Oh! OH! Austin! Hey! Remember me? I'm Eugene!" Eugene exclaimed as he pointed to his nametag.
"I can see that..." Austin remarked as Eugene clapped his hands together and jumped up and down. "Are you constipated?"
"NO... I'm just... happy!" Eugene shouted as everyone looked at him.
"Okay... Go express yourself elsewhere..." Austin replied.
"Okay! Bye!" Eugene yelled before running around the bus.
"Hey! Hey! HEY!" The driver called as he got back on the bus. "NO RUNNING ON THE BUS!"
Eugene stopped running and William got up and guided him back to his seat.
"Sorry about that good sir, he's just a little--" William started.
"He's mentally retarded." Hunter finished.
"He is not!" William yelled as he stood up.
"Yeah, sure... Keep telling yourself that..." Hunter mumbled.
"I will!" William declared.
An Hour Later...
"How long does it take to fix a tire?" Chris complained as they watched various guys try to change the tire.
"Why don't you use Show as the jack?" Randy asked as Big Show looked at him in disgust.
"Whatever... As long as we get outta here..." John replied.
"So we're going to use a man for a jack?" Amy questioned.
"If the shoe fits..." Randy mumbled.
"Okay... Whatever..." Amy said as she waved him off.
"Why are you always such a bitch?" Randy asked.
"You're only mad cos' I turned you down, not once, but twice…" Amy snapped as Randy's jaw dropped and John laughed.
"I thought you said that she said yes…" John teased.
"She, ah, said the word yes… Not to me, but she's said it before." Randy replied.
"That was a very stupid reason…" Amy declared as she shook her head.
"Okay everyone… The new tire is on… Thanks for the great idea, Randy!" Kurt called before getting on the bus.
"Where are we going anyway?" Show asked blankly as he stared at Eric.
"Actually I think Vince said it was called, Camp WWE…" Eric replied as he looked down at the clipboard.
"What?" Austin asked as he stopped dead in his tracks.
"Austin, now is not the time to play you're childish games." Hunter sneered as he stuck his head out the window.
"Shut up Big Nose… Now keep your head in the bus at all times…" Jericho snapped.
"Are you serious? Camp WWE? What the fuck is Vince planning?" Austin asked, ignoring Jericho and Hunter.
Benoit shrugged his shoulders before he and the Dudley's boarded the bus.
"I don't know… But I'm just hoping that I'm not going to be anywhere near Eugene…" Molly mumbled.
William quickly put his hands over Eugene's ears.
"You know the lad has feelings too!" William exclaimed as Molly sent him a dirty look.
"Molly… Just get on the bus…" Eric ordered. "EVERYONE ON THE BUS!"
Trish, Torrie and Stacy rushed up to the bus followed by Hurricane and Rosey, who were apparently doing some off duty superhero work. Gail, Jazz and Victoria also hurried to the bus, saying they didn't want to be left behind, for some odd reason.
"Is that everybody?" Eric asked as he glared at everyone who was seated in the bus.
"I don't know… We're in the middle of nowhere… Do you see any people in that desert right next to us?" Jericho replied.
"Funny… I hope you have something to do, cause the camp is still a few hours away." Eric announced as everyone started complaining to the person next to them and anyone near them.
"This is stupid…" Hunter exclaimed as he crossed his arms.
"Don't sweat it champ! At least we've got some entertainment…" Ric stated.
"What entertainment? All we have is Jericho and Austin… I don't think we can live with them making fun of me the entire time." Hunter sneered.
"Well at least we have entertainment." Shelton interrupted.
"Eric, why do we have a seating arrangement? We aren't children you know?" Benoit asked.
"You have more than a seating arrangement…" Eric replied.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Kurt questioned.
"You'll see… In the mean time, just relax… Chat, do whatever, as long as you don't disturb me or the bus driver…" Eric announced.
The busload of superstars started a conversation with the people near them…
"Rosey, looks like we're going to have to be the entertainment." Hurricane declared as Rosey nodded.
"Good idea, Hurricane!" Rosey exclaimed before Hurricane leaped up from his seat and started talking.
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls… Of all ages…" Hurricane started.
"And with all sizes of noses, right H?" Jericho interrupted.
"Fuck you Jericho!" Hunter snapped.
"No thanks, I'm not gay…" Jericho hissed.
"Hurricane, just sit down!" Eric ordered as he turned around.
"Party popper…" Came an unknown male voice along with a cough.
"What was that Jericho?" Eric asked.
"Ch… What makes you think it was me!" Jericho exclaimed.
"Who else would it have been?" Eric snapped.
The bus grew silent for a few moments until side conversations were started again.
To Be Continued…