Disclaimer: The characters, items, places etc of Final Fantasy VII are property of Squaresoft Ltd

Disclaimer: The characters, items, places etc of Final Fantasy VII are property of Squaresoft Ltd. These objects are used without permission for entertainment only, not for making money. No infringement is intended.

In Space Only They Can Hear You Scream

By Jade Tatsu
Inspired by and for Sylv-chan
Encouraged by and also for Smee-gee-san
(The last two are the people you blame folks ^_^ I'm just the one who wrote them.) You'll understand this comment by the end…. This is only the beginning.

"...you haven't won yet, Sephiroth..."

Sephiroth dismissed the final whisper of the Planet as he floated, suspended in space. The last tattered remains of the Planet flew around him, large chunks of rock he had no difficulty in destroying. Peace... At last... The final explosion of Meteor had been loud. He hadn't realised exactly how loud it was going to be or how much he had been looking forward to the absolute silence of space. He sighed in contentment. This is what it meant to be God. Peaceful forever... There was nothing better. He closed his eyes, just listening to the silence.

After a few minutes Sephiroth frowned, blinking in confusion. He could hear something. That wasn't supposed to be possible. Nothing could have survived Meteor. The Planet hadn't survived but the Lifestream itself had and now was under his control. But he wasn't hearing something from that, he was hearing something with his still very physical ears. What could it be? He fluttered his wings slightly, moving himself around as he tried to pin point the source of the noise.

"...k... ...rk... ...ark..." It came softly but it was getting closer and was definitely there. It wasn't an echo from the Lifestream. He closed his eyes, concentrating only on sound. There was nothing that could attack him so he needn't watch for danger.

"Yeowch!" Sephiroth screamed as something pulled his hair!

"Wark, wark?!"

He flew around, drawing energy into his hand to attack. His feathered arm, he drew back, angling its feathers to be blades. Could this be some cosmic alien, some threat Jenova didn't know about?


Bright blue eyes looked at him, over a wicked beak from which a strand of white hair hung.

Sephiroth's eyes opened wide and the energy he had gathered dissipated entirely. A chocobo? A chocobo had survived Meteor and the destruction of the Planet and was now calmly floating in space, regarding him with mild curiosity now that it had established that his hair wasn't edible. A chocobo?

"Wark, wark?" It cocked it's head, obviously expecting an answer.

A chocobo..? Sephiroth fought the insane smile which was forming on his features. A chocobo had survived everything he could throw at the Planet. One fairly large bird that was customarily used as transportation. It wasn't possible was it? It was almost enough to drive him to despair.


Sephiroth didn't think his eyes could open any wider but he slowly turned himself at the new 'voice'.

"...no..." In the absolute silence of space his voice seemed very small. He couldn't be seeing this.

He couldn't.

Meteor was supposed to have obliterated everything, so this couldn't be.

Behind him, as far as he could see were chocobos and chicobos. It looked like every bird on the Planet had survived and was now gathered into one enormous flock. Blue, green, black, gold, white, yellow, red, purple, every colour imaginable was there making one huge patch of colour that was obscuring the stars. And the noise! The constant "Warks!" of the chocobos and the unformed "Arks" of the chicobos. Space was supposed to be silent. The destruction of the world was supposed to have brought him peace. There were hundreds, thousands of beady eyes watching him. This couldn't be happening to him.

"NO!!!" His scream trailed off as insanity over took him completely and he began laughing. His peaceful eternity had just been destroyed and there was nothing, he had nothing he could do about it. He had used everything, absolutely everything he had to destroy the Planet but it had just exacted it's revenge.

"Hahahahahahahahahaha!~" The laugh was in no way sane if anyone had been around to hear it. That old saying was true after all. The Planet did have more ways to strike back at you than you could defend.

"Hahahahahahahahaha!~" There was nothing he could do, nothing, except seek oblivion himself. He began drawing his energy in again, focusing all it's destructive power inwards this time.

In the end, the Planet had won. As it had always said it would.

To be Continued….

Well… there are a couple more parody's to come! ^_^

Review Please!