Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan or Magic Kaito. Or the song, which is called "I Do" and sung by Bi (Rain); originally in Korean.
- Somewhere, 1:13 A.M. -
"You're friggin suicidal."
"Not 'suicidal', Shin-chan, just... creative."
"No, no. Suicidal."
A frown. "You're so pessimistic."
A shrug. "Hey. When you get killed, at least I won't have to chase after you anymore."
A positively sinister grin. "You're going to be helping me with this."
A gagging noise. "Gods, no. I don't have a death wish, unlike you."
"But, but, but!" Happy, manic, giggle. "Kazuha-san will love me so much after this."
"You're forgetting," came the reply, "that you'll be dead."
- Heiji's house, 10:30 A.M. -
Heiji should have realized that something was wrong when he saw a flash of white blur past his window. His detective instincts going off, he stood up warily and opened his window.
There was a plain white envelope on the windowsill.
Electricity ran up and down his spine, warning him that something - bad - was about to happen.
He picked up the envelope.
A few miles away, a masculine figure clad in a white cape and hat cackled.
- Shinichi's house, 2:00 P.M. -
"It's going perfectly."
"It usually does," came a mild voice, "until the end."
Blink. "Neh, Shin-chaaaan, don't jinx me before it's even happened!"
- Kazuha's house, 6:15 P.M. -
"What's wrong with you?" she asked him indignantly, secretly admiring how good he looked in a tux. It was a special celebration honoring the police force, and being the children of police officers, they were attending.
She was wearing a light pink, off-the-shoulder dress, and Heiji wouldn't stop staring at her, which was seriously creeping her out.
"Nothing," Heiji replied, a light pink flush gracing his features as he crossed his arms and turned away. She frowned at him.
"Well," she said, "we'd better go then, right? We'll be late."
"Yeah." He scowled. "Hang on, I'm thirsty. Could I get a drink of water?"
Kazuha rolled her eyes. "Get it yourself. You know how." And it was true - they spent so much time at each other's houses that Heiji's mother had actually considered giving Kazuha a spare key; same with Kazuha's father for Heiji.
Heiji stuck his tongue out at her and stalked off towards the kitchen. Kazuha watched him leave, heart fluttering.
- Osaka Police Station, 8:45 P.M. -
Heiji poured himself some punch in a plastic cup. He was about to drink it when she called for him, "Heiji!"
An annoyed look danced across his features. "What?"
A horrifed look settled itself on her face, "Our parents brought our baby pictures."
Heiji swore and put his cup back on the table, stalking towards the adults.
Completely missing the fact that a seemingly innocent-looking police officer poured something in his cup.
Heiji returned later on and downed the cup.
- Somewhere, 8:52 P.M. -
"I'm not your accomplice in any way, you got that?"
"I think it's a little late for that. You did pick up the phone, you know."
"Because it wouldn't stop ringing!"
A cackle. "Anyways, I got him here through the pictures of them that I took last year. He almost didn't even show up! And now - all that's left to do is to sit back and relax. I even bugged him, too, so that you can watch the whole thing."
"...you've never actually seen him with a katana before, have you?"
Shinichi smirked on the other end.
- Osaka Police Station, 8:59 P.M. -
Heiji was beginning to feel funny. Exhilarating, almost. Like - like he could do anything he wanted in the world, and there would be no consequences to pay afterwards. None whatsoever.
"Heiji?" Kazuha tilted her head to the side, looking curiously at him. "Are you all right? You've been acting strange all night.."
"I'm fine." He stared at her, a strange feeling welling up in his chest. "You know what?" He got an idea, and a hazy feeling spread throughout his body. "I am better than fine." He took her by the shoulders, for some reason enjoying the blush that slithered over her cheeks. "Hang on, 'zuha." And he stomped over to the stage.
Everyone was silent.
He grabbed the microphone and thumped on it a few times - loudly - to make sure that it was on. He cleared his throat and glanced out over the sea of faces. Gee. Everything sure was blurry...
"Thish," he said, words slurred, "is for... for... you!" And pointed at Kazuha, who made a small eep! sound in the back of her throat and turned pink.
A police officer, lingering in the back of the crowd, subtly snapped his fingers, and music began to play.
"Dear god," Kazuha murmured, feeling faint.
Heiji, to put it simply, was a mess. He couldn't even stand on his own feet, and was constantly tripping over the microphone wire. Nonetheless, he recognized his cue, and began to sing.
"We feel the same and slowly learn about each other
Someday we may possibly hear "I do"
In front of our friends we stay as just friends
But we know we'll be together forever, I do.."
Kazuha's eyes were wide with shock. Heiji's mother was snickering at the entire thing, for crying out loud! And her dad wouldn't stop grinning. Did they find this funny?
Well - she thought, it was rather sweet, and all, but - but - he was drunk, for crying out loud! This could hardly count as being romantic!
Heiji's next verse came in loud and clear over the microphone: "I do, I do, wanna spend my life with you..."
And then began to cry.
Heiji squinted out at the audience. He was pretty sure that that was Kazuha, right in the middle, because she was the only one wearing pink. An idea formed itself in his mind, and he hopped off the stage deftly and strode over to her, dropping the microphone behind him, the music still playing loudly over the speakers.
His mind wasn't working properly right now - but he could see, very clearly, that Kazuha was crying. He hated to see Kazuha cry, even though it was usually because of him, so... so, well, obviously, he had to make her stop crying! Make her feel better!
What should he do, then?
He paused, stopping to think.
He swayed dangerously.
And then, nodded to himself. Yes. Yes, that was what he would do.
He paused, directly in front of her, and put his hands on her shoulders.
He leaned forward -
...and placed a loud, wet kiss, right on her lips.
Then he fell asleep, right on the floor.
Everyone was too preoccupied with the unconscious boy to notice a police officer on the floor, laughing insanely.
- Heiji's house, the next morning, 8:34 A.M. -
There was a small, portable television hanging from the ceiling that greeted him as soon as he opened his eyes. God, his head hurt. He felt nauseous, too.
"Good morning, Hei-chan!"
His left eye twitched. That voice..
"Let me guess." A boy about his age, clad in a white suit, hat, cape, and monocle appeared on screen, grinning craftily. "You don't remember anything at all that happened last night, do you?"
Heiji blinked. He was right..
"Well." Heiji shivered at the smirk on the Phantom Thief's face. "I can help you with that." The screen faded to black, and then shifted to a scene from last night's party, with Heiji on the stage, completely unbalanced.
Heiji's eyes widened.
Dear god, he was singing to Kazuha!
A voice came in, narrating the scene. "I bet you think that's pretty embarrassing, right? Keep watching."
Heiji's mouth dropped open -
On the screen, it showed him stumbling forward drunkenly and - and -
"I personally thought that it was a rather sweet kiss," the voice narrated. "Not so romantic, but it'll make a great story to tell your kids and grandkids, right?"
Heiji roared. "KUROBA!"
- A week later, at the next KID heist, 11:12 P.M. -
Kaito had just been successful at nabbing the jewel from its spot in the center of the museum. He grinned widely. Gosh, his luck was really looking up, wasn't it? The thing with Heiji a week before, and then, now - Absolutely perfect.
He ran up to the rooftop, quickly making sure that no one was there. Yes, they were probably still preoccupied with the identical Kaitou KID doll he'd snuck in..
He double-checked his hang-glider, his form of escape.
And his eyes widened.
There were two, large slashes, right down the middle of it.
Slashes - Kaito pondered this, struggling to keep his poker face in check - slashes, as in, from a... katana?
"Darn it, Shin-chan, I hate it when you're right," he said, slightly put-off that he'd have to take a longer form of escape this time.
It was then that he heard the helicopter hovering over him.
The last thing he remembered before he completely panicked was having cold water dumped over him...
- Headlines at the front page of the newspaper the next day -
"The Kaitou KID certainly flopped at his heist last night!" the papers declared, "He didn't take his usual form of escape with his hang-glider. No, instead, he was last seen running madly away from the scene, tossing the jewel back into Inspector Nakamori's hands, as a helicopter - yes, a helicopter - hovered over him the whole time, drenching him in what appeared to be ice-cold water, with grocery-store-bought fish falling all over him! The Phantom Thief still got away, however, and an irate Inspector Nakamori declined any comments -"
Shinichi put down the paper and bit his lip, trying to refrain from laughing.
"I told you so," he said.
- Heiji's house, 10:00 A.M. -
Heiji picked up the newspaper, scanning the front page for the news.
And then cackled.
His happy mood soon dissipated as his mother called up the stairs, "Heiji! Kazuha-chan's here!"
- Heiji's house, 10:20 A.M. -
"So I was drunk, okay?" he explained to her, glancing warily at her face. "And - it - it was an accident."
Kazuha scowled at him. "Okay. Okay. I get it. It was just an accident."
Heiji blinked at her, considering something. Then before Kazuha had any chance to react, he was directly in front of her, their gazes locked.
"Heiji?" Kazuha blinked, face turning red, "what are you - mmph!"
Her words died off as she found her mouth being claimed by his.
He pulled away sooner than she would have liked, a cross between a soft smile and a smirk on his lips.
"That," he said, "wasn't."
- end -
Random Notes: Let's see, was it sapphirestars who commented on me "singlehandedly bringing the H/K fandom" to the site? Yes, I think so. xD Hey, somebody's got to, neh? And here's another H/K one, with some Kaito silliness thrown in the background, just for kicks.
I know I should be working on "In the Blink of an Eye" ...haha, but my muse has died out for that one. I promise I'll keep working on it, though. x.x AU fics are hard. (whines) Haha, this entire thing was inspired by an H/K music video that I made (by the way, anybody know where I could host those? I mean, I'd love to share 'em with the rest of the H/K fandom, but I can't find anywhere to put it! o.o Ish like... 8, 9 MB?) annnnd, Lyn Jarewo Wors-chan... fwee, thank you, dear! I don't know what I'd do without you!