Know Your Stars: Winx Club

Summary: You know that weird skit on All That where this mystery voice tells you a bunch of untrue facts about a star that's sitting on the stage? This is a parody of it. I'm spoofing the Winx Club characters and you get to watch me do it.

Disclaimer : I'm so broke I can't even pay attention

First Victim: Bloom Princess of Sparx

Bloom walks out on stage muttering. "Techna said she'd help me with my potions homework. Where is she?"

"Sit down!" Commands a mysterious voice. A chair appears out of nowhere and a bright light shines down on it.

"What? Who are you? Where are you?"

"Wouldn't you like to know. Just sit down."

A chorus of 'know your stars' begins as Bloom complies with the voice.

"Bloom, Princess of Sparx."

"Uh, Yeah?"

"Bloom's hair is dyed with orange soda."

"No it's not! This is my natural hair color!" Bloom exclaimed angrily. "And why would I dye it with orange soda?"

"You keep saying that dear. We all know you dye your hair with soda."

"I so do not! You can't dye anything with soda it's ilogical!"

"Yes, you said that." The voice yawns. "Moving, on Bloom princess of Sparx, you have gone after every guy at Red Fountain and a few at Gardenia high school."

"What? That's just a line Riven said when he was under Darcy's spell."

The voice went on as if it didn't hear her. "I'm sure he just made it up. Just because you're boy crazy and crave attention from any guy around."

"Stop it!"

"Doesn't mean you're a desperate boy crazy slut."

"Oh you are so gonna die… Icy."

"I'm not Icy you loony fairy. Bloom you secretly have a crush on… Professor Saladine from Red Fountain."

"What? That's crazy! He's old enough to be my grandfather!"

"So you have a reversed Oviparous complex as well as an uncontrollable need for attention. No biggy."

"Except that I don't have a crush on Professor Saladine!"

"Ah, denial, another sign of hidden passion."

"I don't have a crush on him you stupid head."

"Can you prove it? I have it on good authority that you like older men. Heck even Mr. Knut looks good huh?"

Bloom's face went from confused to utterly disgusted, then her eyes lit up. "You're insane Icy!"

"Huh? Who's Icy?" The voice sounded shocked.

"I'm gonna kick your witchy butt Icy!"

"I'm not Icy you dimwit!"

"Ahh!" Bloom shot a fire ball at the direction of the voice and stomped off.

"Now you know, Bloom Princess of Sparx."

"No you don't!" Bloom called back.


Okay, so that chapter sucked really bad, but hey let me know what you think anyways. And read Nintendo Queen's W.I.T.C.H. Know your Stars because it's better than mine. Oh and give me Ideas since I want to bother either Stella or Sky next. Ooh Sky would be so fun. So vote!