Well, well, well…back for more, eh? I guess one dip in the pond wasn't good enough for you, so I guess I have to start Season 2 for you childrens. Well, I'm a senior, almost 18, so anything can happen this time around! I promise, Jason's Pond is still in full-swing (probably even over-flowing), so let's start the show!
Disclaimer-so-I-don't-get-my-ass-sued: The people (besides the Titans) do exist and I do know them personally. I have their permission to use their names. The situations in this story have actually happened (most anyway).
Jason's Pond: Season 2
Fool Some in Folsom
(start theme song "Californication" by the Chili Peppers)
(shot of the whole cast looking dramatic with wavy hair)
(shot of the multiple "fan techs" aiming portable fans at cast)
I feel like I've lived a life of craziness for so long. I believe my last year in high school should be totally-
"So I see the therapy didn't help?" my friend Katie said, smacking me in the face. "Ow, my face!" I screamed, rubbing it. "Gosh, you're so mean, Katie!"
"It's my job," she said simply, shrugging. Just then, Scott and Mike walked up. "What's up guys? First week of school was awesome!" Scott said a big smile on his face.
"Yeah, it was alright. Especially when Guarienti saw me again…"
"Hi guys, my name is Mrs. Guarienti and-" my Chemistry teacher started to say, when I walked into the classroom. "Hey Mrs. G, I'm in your class again! Isn't it great?" I said, cackling evilly.
The woman began to sob and bang her head against the desk. "Why God? Why me!" she screamed. The other kids looked at her, and then to me. "Don't worry, she was like this at the end of the year last year," I said, reassuring the rest of the class…
"What a cruel twist of fate," Mike said in a Shakespearean tone of voice. I looked at him in disbelief, shaking my head. "I know you're sad about leaving Gibson's class, but we have to move on."
Minutes later, Beast Boy and Raven walked up, making out like usual. "When you guys get VD, I have a great "I'm-sorry-you-got-VD" greeting card for you two," I said, warning them. The two just shrugged and broke up their kiss. "Dude, look what I got!" Beast Boy said, pulling out an iPod. "I finally got my own!"
"Whoopdie-doo," I said, rolling my eyes. "So, how'd you get it?"
"Vit mein ass harder, Beastie Boy!" the German prostitute screamed, waving a paddle covered in tofu…
"Uh, you know, I'd rather not talk about it," Beast Boy said, shuffling his feet and looking down. Just then, we heard moaning and crying. To our dismay, Cyborg and Robin walked up, dressed in gray, wearing Pink Converse. Their skin was painted ghost-white and their lips were painted black, along with the sags under their eyes.
"Oh…my…God," I laughed, unable to control myself. The two emo children were crying and hugging each other. "I'm like, so depressed!" Cyborg sobbed, moaning. "Yeah, my Happy Meal didn't have a toy in it!" Robin screamed, cutting himself with a disposable razor.
"It's so sad," Raven said, adding, "even for me." The two idiots sat there carving happy faces in their skin and I had had enough. I grabbed the razors from their hands and threw them into the nearest bush. "I am really getting pissed at your little ego changes," I said, slapping them both. "Get up and go wash your arms!" They ran away crying like little bitches.
A few moments later, when the coast was clear, we ripped off our clothes to reveal…clothing, that was black. We magically got umbrellas and started waving them in the air synchronized, singing "Helena" by My Chemical Romance.
"So long and good nighttt…"
Sad, isn't it? More coming soon. xD