All right, people. Do not take this seriously. I don't even know why I wrote this! I was just sitting in the jeep on the way back home last night when I was struck with this weird idea and I couldn't help but do it!
And if you are going to ask me, yes I hate chat rooms.
A.U-ish… Warnings of EXTREME OOCness…
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.
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Athrun made his way down the long staircase of the Attha Mansion, went straight to the kitchen to grab a glass of juice, and then set off to search for Cagalli, who, much to his displeasure, had been MIA in her room where she was supposed to be to do her usual daily paperwork for the past two hours.
The Justice pilot was seriously thinking the blond-haired princess was trying to squirm out of her obligations, especially when it was "Signing of Useless Crap" day, or so she had dubbed it. But still he did not want to tolerate her this time. He was going to find her, drag her all the way back to her room and even sit on her if he needed to just to get her to stay put and finally get her work done so he can finally take her out to a quiet evening alone with her. Hadn't she been postponing that date for over a week now simply because she couldn't get her work done?
"Cagalli?" he called out after taking a swig of his juice. Making his way though the lobby and peeking into the music room, he frowned when he saw that the house was nearly deserted except for a couple of maids changing the curtains in the living room.
He stopped by the young blown-haired maid who was holding up the old curtains. "Have you seen the Princess?"
She looked up at him and smiled shyly. All of the young maids in the mansion always seemed to blush every time he tried to talk to them. "Yes, sir. I saw her go into her late father's study about an hour ago right after she had finished talking to Ms. Miriallia Haww."
Athrun blinked down at the maid, making the girl blush even more. "What on Earth has she been doing there?"
"I have no idea, sir. But I do believe she hasn't come out since."
Frowning a bit at the thought of Cagalli trying to hide inside her father's study, Athrun sighed. "Thank you. I think I'll go see her now." He smiled down at the girl and handed her his unfinished glass of juice. "Take this to the kitchen for me when you're done, will you?"
He waited for her to acknowledge him but the girl looked like she was going to explode. Shrugging, he turned around and stalked across the living room hastily, after hearing the maid he had talked to squeal silently, blurting out "He talked to me!" in a hushed, excited whisper.
He knew exactly where the study was. Cagalli had shown him to it not a few weeks ago to show him pictures of her father and her when she was still young. He was about to knock on the door when he heard laughter floating in from the inside.
Cagalli? Laughing to herself?
This ought to be good. Not even bothering to knock, hoping to catch her off guard, he opened the door and walked in casually. He was caught off guard by the darkness of the room, except for a small lamp sitting in the middle of the room where Cagalli was. Athrun threw her a puzzled glace.
There, sitting on her father's swivel chair behind the huge oak desk, was Cagalli, face buried on the monitor of those bulky old computers.
What the heck is she doing?
Much to his annoyance – he was expecting an outburst from Cagalli for not knocking – his girlfriend merely glanced over to him, and turned back to what she was doing.
"Don't tell me you've been on that for an hour," he blurted out as he made his way to her.
"Two, actually. Milly and I were chatting."
Athrun gave her a perplexed look as he scooted her over and squeezed next to her on the seat. When she wouldn't budge, he grabbed her around the waist, picked her up and sat on the chair, sitting her on his lap. "I thought you were just on the phone with her. And what the heck is that?" He pointed at the square window thingies on the monitor of her computer. When Cagalli's face flushed and tried to cover the monitor, he pinned her wrists to the side with one hand, then peered closer to the computer screen. "What the…? Strikerouge123?That's your username?"
Cagalli wriggled her right hand free and swatted Athrun fiercely. "How dare you make fun of my e-mail address!"
Athrun laughed. "Couldn't you have made a better one, though?"
She leered at him. "I bet you have a dorky name like I do."
Athrun swallowed hard. Yes, he did have a dorky name. But that was because all the cool names were taken and he didn't like his e-mail address with numbers.
Yes, his username was imalittleteapot …
But he sure as hell won't be telling her that.
Changing the subject, he pointed at the monitor again, at the name DearkaMilly4ever. "Is that Miriallia?"
Cagalli shook her head and turned on the computer again. "Nope. That's Dearka." She clicked and dragged the chat box of DearkaMilly4ever and revealed another chatbox with the name MillyDearka4ever. "That's Miriallia."
Athrun stared at the computer blankly. What is it with people and their names? "So I can talk to Dearka on this?"
Cagalli stared at him weirdly. "Haven't you ever chatted before?"
Athrun scoffed. He had never even dreamed of using his e-mail address for such a thing as chatting!
His girlfriend was not happy with his reaction. "You act as if this is a bad thing. For your information, this is the cheapest form of communication. My phone bills have been running up the wall, and Miriallia told me to just log in to talk to her and Dearka."
Athrun didn't like the look on Cagalli's face and decided to let her be happy with whatever she was doing. "Fine. So can I type something to Dearka and tease him about his username?"
"He and Miriallia are talking right now. We shouldn't disturb them."
"Then what are we doing here? You have some work to do waiting up in your room and – "
Athrun's head shot up and he glared daggers at the computer. A new window had popped up in front of DearkaMilly4ever and MillyDearka4ever, shook a bit before settling down and Athrun's blood pressure rose at the sight of it.
Sexinsantassleigh has just sent you a nudge!
"Sexinsantassleigh? Sexinsantassleigh? Who the heck is that?" He demanded as he gestured wildly at the computer. He didn't want his Cagalli talking to someone who had a username about having sex in Santa's old sleigh!
Cagalli fidgeted on his lap, a bit uncomfortable. "It's just some guy who kept on nudging me when I went into a chat room earlier."
Of course, he had never been in these chat rooms before, but if this was how perverted people were at their names, he didn't trust them to say anything nice at all. "You actually talked to this guy?"
Cagalli was indignant. "Ugh! Of course not! He just kept on nudging me."
"I don't like guys nudging you."
That kept her quiet. After a while, she started being stubborn all over again. "Look, it's utterly harmless. I was just waiting for Miriallia to get on and I didn't have anything to do, so I just went into one of these chat rooms and just watched them fight over stupid stuff. I didn't even talk to any of them."
"I still don't like guys nudging you."
Sexinsantassleigh has just sent you a nudge!
Athrun lunged for the keyboard but Cagalli leaned her back onto him to prevent him from doing anything drastic. "Zala, you are being stupid. Now, I'm gonna log out after I say goodbye to Dearka and Miriallia, all right?"
Athrun looked at her suspiciously. She stared back at him with a frustrated expression. He watched as Cagalli started typing on the chat boxes for both DearkaMilly4ever and MillyDearka4ever before closing their windows, as well as sexinsantassleigh's.
"You know," Cagalli said as she twisted on his seat so that she could look at him. "You are being quite over-protective. I didn't even do anything."
Athrun shook his head. He personally didn't care. Who the heck could ever trust a person with that username? "It's a crazy world out there. And I don't feel too comfortable with you talking to strangers."
"We weren't even talking!" she exclaimed.
"He was nudging you."
Sexinsantassleigh has just sent you a nudge!
The pervert's window popped up again and Athrun narrowed his eyes at the monitor. "What a loser. He won't give up."
Cagalli swatted him again. "Stop being paranoid. For all you know, that could be a girl."
"That would be even creepier. But it's a guy. It just has to be."
Sexinsantassleigh has invited you to view their webcam. Would you like to Accept? Decline?
The couple stared at it for a few seconds before Cagalli finally gestured at the computer casually. "If it bothers you so much, by all means go check it out."
Athrun was silent as his eyes lingered on the question, and his hand glided the cursor over the accept option. He didn't really want to see who the heck the pervert behind the perverted name was, but he supposed curiosity got the better of him.
A new window popped up and after a brief second, the webcam started feeding messages to their computer… and…
Athrun gasped and Cagalli screamed. An image of a slender woman with big breasts jumped out of the monitor at them, and she was in the process of taking off her very thin top.
Athrun's eyes bulged as his hands shook to get the window to close.
"Put it away! Put it away!" Cagalli screeched as her hand dove for the mouse, knocking Athrun's hand off and the cursor hitting the exit button and instead accidentally clicked on the maximize button. The image of the woman stripped down to her bra filled the whole monitor and Cagalli screamed some more.
"How the heck do you shut this thing off?" Athrun shouted. Those stupid old fashioned computers were so complicated! The woman was reaching behind her, obviously ready to snap her bra off, and for the love of him, the image of sexinsantassleigh was screaming at them.
"I can't find the minimize thingie!" Cagalli panicked. "Athrun help me! Do some – what the heck are you doing! Stop looking at her!"
"I'm not looking at her!"
"Yes you are!"
"No I'm not!" Athrun reached forward, finally giving up on the stupid old-fashioned computers as he couldn't see where the resize buttons were. He decided to just turn off the computer. "There! That takes care of that…"
And they were silently panting as they stared at the blank monitor of the computer.
"I am scarred for life… " Athrun murmured.
None of them talked again until Cagalli, who slowly sank back into him, nodded and said, "I told you she was a girl." She eyed him suspiciously. "You were ogling her boobs."
Athrun gasped at the accusation. "I was not! You maximized her image and I was looking for the resize buttons! Besides, if you hadn't started going into chat rooms and talking to strangers, you wouldn't have had this experience to begin with!"
Cagalli pouted, a hurt look crossing her face as she inched away from him a bit. "I was curious. That's all." Then her expression changed back to the hard-faced Cagalli that made Athrun a bit weak in the knees. "Never do that again, Athrun Zala."
"What did I do now?"
"You were ogling her boobies!"
"I told you I was not!" Just then a sly smile crept across Athrun's face. "And besides, if I wanted to ogle someone, it might as well be you." He pulled her closer to him and whispered in her ear. "Come on, strikerouge123… "
Cagalli snickered. "Oh, I don't know… I don't think I would like to take my clothes off for someone whose username is imalittleteapot…."
He didn't even know how she found out about his username, but he just knew he won't be able to live that down…
Shaking his head, he looked at her sternly. "Get back to work… "
Cagalli only laughed.
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Ahh, I hate chat rooms. It would always make you wonder if there are still any people at all who make sense in them. But anyway, if you are asking if this ever happened to me before, yes it did. It was not a good experience either. I have stayed away from chat rooms ever since.
Anyway, for a lighter side of things, I have been relocating my website for the last two days to an even better place. I would appreciate it if you would come and visit me there and drop a note in my guestbook for suggestions. Not that there would be anything you might want to see there, because it's quite bare still, but I would like your expert opinion on it. The link to my website, Cookies, Anyone can be found on my profile and click on the homepage.
Ahh well, so much for this. I love little one-shots that make no sense at all. Expect an update to TIH in the coming week.