Setting: post Buffy season 7, Ultimates Year 2
Dear old Dad…
The men's locker room was a scene of utter chaos: two of the newly appointed Giant Men where lying through one wall, having been caught mid-way through a height multiplication. Hawkeye was curled up in a ball on the floor, whimpering as he clutched a rather intimate part of his anatomy. Captain America was trying, unsuccessfully, to extract his head from the locker it had been jammed into, while Quicksilver was hanging from a light fitting, apparently out cold.
"What the hell happened in here?" Asked an amazed General Fury, "Did Thor get out or something?"
"He still in lockup." Black Widow advanced, dressed in her suit of armor, "Where's Tony?"
"Next room." Scarlet Witch pointed at an open doorway as she tried to find something to stand on so she could get her brother down.
The S.H.E.I.L.D. Assault team advanced slowly, weapons held at the ready. One of them pulled a stun-grenade from his belt and prepaired to pull the pin.
"BASTARD!" A young and defiantly female voice yelled.
Fury ducked in time to avoid being hit by Tony Stark as the multibillionaire businessman flew through the air, landing in a heap next to Hawkeye. He groaned slightly, making no attempted to get up.
"What the $#?" Fury blinked.
"Get back here, you son of a bitch!" A short, burnet haired woman appeared in the doorway, holding what could only be described as a scythe in one hand, "I've not finished with you yet!"
One of the solders made the mistake of putting a hand on the young woman's shoulder, only to have it broken in two places faster than anyone could follow.
"Ok, playtimes over!" Fury drew his sidearm and pointed it at the young woman, "You got a name, Miss?"
"Faith, Faith Lehane." The woman didn't take her eyes off of Stark, "A friend of mine did some hacking, and found out that that sack of shit down there is my farther."
"Your what?" Black Widow looked up from her fiancé.
"My father." Faith pulled a computer printout from her pocket and tossed it at Fury, "It took a long time and a lot of effort to crack the layers of encryption, but she's very, very good."
"This is a S.H.E.I.L.D. internal memo!" Fury blinked, "This is a Top Secret Document! How did you get this?"
"You have your ways, I have mine." Faith looked down at Stark, "I'd advise against him trying to press charges: I have a friend who runs a major law firm in L.A."
Faith pushed past Fury and started off down the corridor.
"Wait!" Fury ran to catch up with her, "Did you do all that in there on your own?"
"Yeah, well, your Toy Solders didn't want me to talk to dad." Faith put her hands on her hips, "You got a problem with that?"
"A problem? Hell no!" Fury laughed, "How would you like a job?"
"Would I been on the same team as my farther?"
"If you wanted."
"General, this could be the start of a beautiful friendship…"
It's late, I'm somewhat drunk, and I'll probably not remember writing this come tomorrow morning. Hope you enjoyed it.