A/N: I kept hearing that stupid saying 'If you love something let it go…" (blah, blah you know the one) So I thought I'd put it too the test with Inu+kag and see how it worked out. This is also my first attempt at a real kissing scene so be nice. Ok?
CHAPTER 1 : Fading Sunlight
Kagome stood next to the well and closed her eyes. Her hand came up to enclose the completed Shikon no tama that hung from a thin chain around her neck. Looking down at it she marvelled that such a small thing could cause so much trouble, so much pain. Turning it in her hand, her thumb moved over the smooth surface; it was all going to be ok now though.
Everything was working out the way it should. Naraku had been defeated, Miroku's hand restored. Sango had her little brother Kohaku back safe and sound and soon she and Miroku would marry and leave to make a new life for themselves. InuYasha and Sesshomaru had even come to a truce of sorts. Kagome smiled; well they ignored each other but at least they didn't try to kill each other. Even Koga was settled. Eventually he had given up on her seeing that she would never love him and soon he was to be married to Ayame. There was only one thing left undone as far as she was concerned.
She closed her eyes at the pain inside her that even just the thought of that name caused. Kikyo was still around, her presence dominated everything, and still InuYasha said nothing. He seemed content to let things go on as they had been but Kagome felt as if it was slowly killing her. Every time he rushed off when he caught Kikyo's scent, every time his face was shrouded in the pain that these encounters caused him, and every time she had to see him deep in thought over that bitch. It hurt.
Kagome's hand clenched over the jewel, but what hurt most was when he looked at her, his eyes tender or when he touched her when no one was looking, his fingers caressing her. It hurt even just to look at him sometimes, to know that he might care for her but he would choose another. And she didn't know if she would be able to take it. She could never stand there and make him choose. Never. Whatever he did, he would end up hurting someone he cared for and she wouldn't be able to stand and watch him go through that kind of pain. So she'd make the choice for him. She had no reason to stay here every thing was finished. It was time for her to leave
An afternoon breeze rustled the trees, bringing with it a tantalizingly familiar scent. InuYasha. She might not have his delicate sense of smell but she would recognize his particular scent anywhere. It would haunt her the rest of her days. She heard the whisper of his hair against his clothes as he moved behind her.
"Kagome?" his voice was unsure.
Slowly she turned around and opened her eyes to look at him. Her eyes clashed with his and she quickly turned her head away. 'I can't do this, I can't,' she told herself.
'You have to,' a little voice responded, 'What you feel now will be nothing compared to the pain you'll feel later if you let this continue'.
Taking a deep breath she slowly let it out again and turned to look at him but her eyes dropped to his chest unable bear the tender concern she could see there. Slowly she reached up and unhooked the necklace from around her neck. Holding it in front of her, she watched as it twinkled in the fading sunlight, beams of light piercing it and shooting off into different directions.
"What is it Kagome? Why are you ---," he stopped as she quickly took the last three steps separating them, feeling him tense as her breasts came up against his chest. He stood still arms by his side. Raising her arms she wrapped them around his neck and rested her head against his chest. I want to tell you now… tell you the things I could never say to you before. I want to tell you… tell you how much I…Kagome bit down hard on her lip as tears filled her eyes. But I can't tell you… I can't… so I'll show you…please let me show you.
Lifting her head Kagome raised her eyes to his trying to make him hear her thoughts, trying to tell him. Her eyes slid slowly to his lips and she felt him tense again.
NO! Her brain screamed. Pulling his head down she stood on tiptoes and brushed her lips against his, silencing him. Don't talk. I don't want to talk, not yet. Just give me one moment, that's all I want, just one moment to show you…show you how I feel. One moment that's just ours.
His hands came to her shoulder's holding her there as he raised his head and looked down at her, his face unreadable.
Please! Her heart cried, please just one moment, one moment before it ends. She dropped her eyes to hide the fear she felt, fear that the end would come all too soon. She felt his hands leave her shoulders and drop. No special moment, she thought as she made a move to step back only to have his arms move around her and pull her to him, his mouth crashing down on hers. Kagome stiffened for a moment in shock, then relaxed moving herself closer into his embrace, her arms tightening around his neck again.
His lips moved over hers, gently he touched his tongue to her lips, coaxing them to part. She moaned and her lips parted allowing his tongue to slide between them, as he did, a jolt shot through Kagome's body, a shiver of pleasure running down her spine. Timidly she touched her own tongue to his and her world exploded at the ferocity of his response.
His arms crushed her closer; his hands sliding down her hips, moulding her closer to his thighs. His mouth slanted fiercely over hers, his tongue plunging deep into her mouth, caressing her own. Kagome groaned softly kissing him back, her hands moving up to spread through his thick hair, losing herself in the kiss, neither of them thinking.
An eon later he slowly lifted his mouth from hers, his breathing heavy. Still holding her close he buried his face in her hair, his lips touching her neck.
"Kagome," his voice was barely recognizable. "We have to stop,"
Kagome shivered as his lips moved against the sensitive skin of her neck. Pulling back she looked at him with her heart in her eyes " Just one more moment ," she whispered, "I want to show you," she lent up and traced his lips with her tongue. With a groan of surrender he covered her mouth again kissing her, his tongue entwining with hers.
Kagome's hands clenched in his hair for a second before sliding to his shoulders, pushing away his clothes to touch bare skin. She felt his chest muscles leap reflexively then draw tight as her hand touched him. Her own knees threatened to buckle as he slipped his hand up under her loose shirt to rest on her ribcage, his fingers brushing the underside of her breasts.
Kagome's hands tightened over his shoulders afraid she might fall but his arm came up from her hips to the small of her back, holding her tightly to him. Realizing she wasn't going to fall, she let her hands continue their exploration, smoothing across the muscles of his chest. Slowly her hand slid down his body, reaching his waist and she played with the fabric of his hakama before her fingers hesitantly slid inside.
Groaning, InuYasha pulled his mouth from hers and captured her wandering hand, holding it in his own as he buried his face back in her neck, biting her gently in frustration.
"Kagome. We can't do this," he breathed raggedly, his lips moving against her skin, his warm breath tickling her ear. His arms slid around her waist and hugged her to him.
Kagome's hand tightened on him for a moment, not wanting to let go. Sighing she relaxed her grip and leaned into him and looked up at the sky, trying to blink back the sudden tears that were clouding her vision. It was time to go. This was her only moment she would have no others. He belonged to Kikyo.
Slowly she slid her arms back up around his neck, her hands gently moving under the beads he hated so much. Placing her lips against his ear, her mouth moved silently telling what she had longed to but now never would. I love you InuYasha. Pulling her head back she reached up and pressed her lips to his one last time.
Stepping back out of his arms, she raised her trembling hands bringing the Kotodama beads with her. The tears were falling silently down her cheeks and onto the necklace she now held close to her chest. Looking up she tried to smile. She failed miserably. Pain was tearing across her chest making it hard for her to breath, taking a deep breath she tried to calm herself and speak.
"You're free, InuYasha," she whispered holding out the beads in her hand as if to prove it to him.
He stood there, a bewildered expression on his face, his hands laying empty at his sides, seemingly waiting for something to hold. Kagome resisted the urge to beg him to hold her and never let her go.
"The jewel is yours," she nodded toward the necklace she had placed around his neck. "Just like you always wanted," He looked down at the jewel as if stunned it was there.
"You can do what you want now," she said thinking bitterly that what he probably wants is to find Kikyo. Her hand grasped her chest at the pain the thought caused her.
InuYasha reached out a hand as if to help her but she cringed away and stepped back coming up against the well.
"No, don't touch me," her voice caught on a sob and she could barely get the words out. "I can't…I can't bear…" she bit her lip trying to swallow the sob that rose to her throat.
"Kagome, what the hell are you talking about? What's going on?" he moved to step forward but she held her hand out to stop at him. He looked at it then her in confusion.
"Kagome what---," he stopped as she shook her head and stepped up onto the edge of the well never taking her eyes off him.
"I have to go InuYasha," she sobbed, the pain eating away at her insides. "I have to. Please…Please tell everyone …I'm sorry. I can't bear to say… good bye to them," she stuttered.
"Tell them yourself," he growled, angry now.
"Goodbye InuYasha," she whispered tears pouring from her eyes.
"Don't you dare Kagome! I'll come and drag you back!" he yelled, lunging forward to grab her but missing as she stepped back and disappeared into the well. He growled. Stupid girl, didn't she know he would just come after her like he had every time before? He touched the jewel around his neck. What the hell kind of game was she playing? He smiled grimly; she was going to pay when he caught her. Kissing him like that and then just going back to her own time. What the hell was she thinking? He had a good mind to finish what she had started. Jumping over the wood into the well he landed with a heavy thud on the bottom, dust flying up around him.
"What the hell?" looking up he saw darkening sky and trees not the dirty old roof he'd expected. Leaping back up, he tried again jumping down only to land on the bottom again. No blue light, no cosmic space, nothing.
He couldn't get through the well! What had she done?
"What the hell did you do Kagome! He yelled at the stone walls. How could she seal the well? Did she even know how? Had someone shown her how? His mind seared for answers. He dismissed the idea of her grandfather, he was useless, and her mother and brother wouldn't have been any help. No, there were only two people she could have asked, Kaede and Miroku. And all his bets were on the stupid interfering monk. Anger roared to life inside him fuelled by the pain he felt. He was going to beat Miroku until he unsealed the well. Yeah, that's exactly what he'd do, first he'd pummel Miroku then he'd go bring Kagome back, whether she liked it or not.
Jumping back out of the well he stalked in the direction of the village only to stop as he spotted his prey standing at the edge of the clearing, Shippo at his side. With one leap he landed in front of Miroku his fangs bared and lifted him by the front of his robes, causing him to drop his staff.
"What did you do monk?" he snarled
Miroku looked down at him calmly.
"I did only what she asked me to do," he replied not even trying to pretend he did not know what they were talking about. InuYasha shook him, that was not the answer he wanted.
"WHAT DID YOU DO!" he yelled.
Miroku looked down at the angry half demon and regretted the fact he had something to do with the pain he saw in those angry golden eyes. "I gave her everything she needed to properly seal the well. Forever," his voice was low and calm as if he sensed how close to the edge InuYasha was. "It can't be undone,"
"NO!" InuYasha screamed as he threw the monk against a tree, watching him slide down to the ground.
"InuYasha!" Shippo cried in shock. He ran to Miroku's side "You're in trouble now," he said looking back at InuYasha "I'm going to tell Kagome when she ---,"
"Kagome's gone," InuYasha bit out as he stalked toward where Miroku lay, winded.
"She'll be back though and when she does I'll---,"
"She's never coming back," InuYasha cut him off cruelly.
"No!" Shippo cried, "That's not true!"
InuYasha ignored him and reached down and grabbed Miroku by the throat, lifting him in the air again.
"Shippo," Miroku rasped "Go to the village," It was better if InuYasha and himself sorted this out now, without interference.
Shippo looked at both of them not sure what to do, then without another word, ran intent on getting Sango before InuYasha did something he regretted.
"You know she'll never forgive you if you kill me," Miroku managed to get out.
"I'm not going to kill you, only beat you to a bloody pulp," InuYasha's grin was pure malice.
"She won't like that either," Miroku rasped. InuYasha dropped him to the ground.
"What does it matter if she's never coming back?" his voice was thick with anger and pain.
Miroku sat rubbing his throat "It was her choice InuYasha,"
InuYasha turned his back and clenched his fists by his side.
" She didn't do this lightly. She wanted you to be free to continue your life… whatever you chose," he added InuYasha spun around to face him.
"And what if SHE was my choice!" he yelled
"Was she?" Miroku asked quietly
InuYasha spun back around and stalked off toward the well without answering.
Miroku sighed sadly and lay down on the grass looking up at the sky as the first stars began to appear. "I hope you can live with your choice Kagome," he whispered, "because I don't think InuYasha can,"
InuYasha stood by the well where only a short time ago he had stood with Kagome in his arms. How could she leave him? He jumped in and once again landed on the bottom. Ripping the Shikon jewel from around his neck he dug a hole in the dirt and placing the jewel in the bottom he buried it. It'll work, he told himself. It worked once before. She'll sense the jewel and she'll come back. She had to.
He sat and waited… and waited… and waited.
"Damn it! Get back here Kagome!" he yelled in frustration. His fist hit the stone wall at his side, shattering the stone and cracking the ones around it.
"Come back here! You can't leave me!" he slammed his fists in the ground
As she sank into the light Kagome immediately began to move her lips, silently saying the words to seal the well closed behind her. She didn't stop until her feet touched the ground once more. With shaking hands she pulled out five slips of paper from her pocket and stepped to each side of the well, placing a piece of the paper on each. Holding the last piece she sat in the centre of the well, tears still streaming from her eyes. Slowly she dug a small hole, her hands shaking so much she kept dropping the dirt, having to start again. When the hole was dug she reached back into her pocket and pulled out a shiny black stone. Placing the paper around it she lowered it to the small hole and covered it with dirt, her tears wetting the soil.
She sat there, InuYasha's beads still clutched in her hand, watching as her tears fell on there surface making them glisten like precious stones. Only one thing left to do, she thought and then the well would seal forever. She traced her finger over the sharp point of one of the bones on the necklace.
Suddenly a noise came from the wall in front of her, making her look up. Stunned she watched as one of the stones in the wall crumbled and others around it cracked, the chips of stone turning to dust before her eyes. A sob racked her body.
"InuYasha," she cried. It could only be him. A familiar sensation made her nerves tingle. The Jewel.
"Kagome!" her body jerked. She couldn't have heard that. She couldn't have. It was only her imagination, she told herself. It was over. There was no going back. Slowly she drew the bone across her palm, cutting into her flesh. She watched as the blood ran down her wrist but she barely felt pain. Physical pain was fleeting but the pain in her heart would last her a lifetime. She placed her hand face down on the soil, letting her blood seep into it.
A light started to spread from under her hand travelling outward until it covered the bottom of the well. The papers on the walls glowed and slowly writing appeared on them, the black ink, stark against the white paper. Slowly the light faded and Kagome sat back slowly, shaking uncontrollably. Crawling over to the broken stone she placed her hand over it as if trying to somehow connect to him. She sobbed and her hand slid away. She was never going to see him again.
Crumpling over she wrapped her arms around herself and rocked back and forth trying to overcome the hollow empty feeling inside her but it would not go away and neither would a voice that kept calling her name.
A/N: There's more of this story but I don't know whether to add it or leave her sitting in the well forever, crying her eyes out. Oh well, I guess I'll put the next chapter up, can't have her crying forever.