A Harry Potter slightly crossed insanity fan fiction

Started 24 January 2005
Completed - pending

Last revised 5 October 2007
Reason – minor correction and new chapter

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all associated characters are the property Ms. Rowling's and are used without permission. This fan-fiction isn't intended for commercial use but is rather a tribute to the Harry Potter universe. This fan fiction imports the active and concluding elements (but not the characters or storylines) of the (Japanese Anime) Ranma ½ and Tenchi crossover fan fiction 'The Virus' by Chris Jones (www (dot) Furinkan (dot) net (slash) fanfic (slash) virus.txtor FF-net story ID 93246.

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Wandless Magic By Cloud Dreamer

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Prologue - A Virus

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Hermione stared at the television in shock as the frantic news reporter explained the unusual aspects of the airborne pandemic that had spread from Japan and was evidently making its way across the world. She was in shock because a muggle was describing an apparently magical malady.

She was distracted as her mother sneezed violently several times. "Mum, you ok?"

"Yes, honey," Jane Granger replied, "we must have picked up a cold or something from the dental conference we just got back from. One of the Japanese representatives seemed to become ill at the end there."

"Japanese?" squeaked Hermione as she worriedly glanced back at the TV.

Her mother's answer was lost in a series of increasingly violent sneezes that ended when brunette Jane abruptly transformed into a taller blond male.

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Chapter One - A meeting of minds or a mindless meeting?

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Dumbledore laid his glasses on the table and wearily massaged his temples as he sought to relieve his aching head. Tiredly he glanced around the large horseshoe shaped table set up in the great hall of Hogwarts. He sat at the head of the table and various members of his staff were sitting to his immediate left while on the far left side of the large table were gathered the Minister of Magic and a dozen of his senior aides. On the Headmaster's right side were assembled various leaders of the magical community, many of whom just happened to also be members of the Order of the Phoenix as well. Next to them were seated various representatives of several non-human magical folk.

He sighed and then flared his magical aura in an effort to start the meeting. The noise abated as everyone's attention focused on the Headmaster. Albus smiled, the twinkle in his blue eyes dancing madly as he asked the medi-witch standing at the podium in the open arch of the horseshoe table, "Madame Pomfrey, can you please summarize the history and effects of this new virus if you would?"

"Of course Headmaster," she paused then began in a somewhat lecturing mode; "The wizarding world has few magical maladies, Lycanthropy being the most widely known though most children do experience wizards flu at one time or another. The magical element for this newly discovered virus originated at Jusenkyo . . ."

She was cut off as Minister of Magic Fudge stood up and yelled, "Rubbish! Everyone knows that that is nothing more than a myth. This has to be something that 'he-who-must-not-be-named' has done."

Her lips white with a repressed scorn, Pomfrey hissed, "My word Minister, I did not realize that you were an expert in medicine as well as everything else."

Fudge flushed in rage at the verbal slap but before he could continue, a young ministerial aide by the name of Percy reminded his boss, "Sir, ah, it is policy that 'he-who-must-not-be-named' isn't mentioned."

A scattering of chuckles around the table prompted Fudge to sit again after a brief glare at the pompous aide.

"As I was saying before being so rudely interrupted, Jusenkyo magic is inherent to this new virus. For those who are unfamiliar with this somewhat rare magical element I will provide a brief description. It is the residue of a large magical battle that occurred about four thousand years ago. The battle was a five sided one with goblin warlocks contesting a mythril mine against dwarven mages while vampires using blood magic and the now extinct magical metallic dragons were against everybody. Unfortunately the mine was beneath one of the ancient towns of the elder elves before they left this realm. As if the mixture of these five dissimilar magics was not bad enough, the battle site was over a nexus of planetary Ley-lines." She paused to take a brief sip of water and to allow her words to be assimilated.

"Continuing," she stated, "the merging of this strange mixture of magics enchanted the mythril ore to produce an unusual curse. Unfortunately the battle shattered the mines and caused them to become permanently flooded as sources for enchanted springs; an enchantment that has been maintained ever since by the power of the Ley-lines." She sighed and added, "The enchantment created hundreds of small springs, each is uniquely cursed to cause anyone or any being who is immersed in the waters of that spring to become transformed into the physical form of the last being to have drowned in that spring. The curse is activated by cold water and temporarily negated by hot water. Every hundred years or so an effort is made to mask the springs from the muggle world but the magic of the springs is so chaotic that all wards fail within days of being cast. Unfortunately the very chaotic nature of this mixed magic also makes the curse incurable and immune to all known magic."

She sighed and explained, "That is the history of the magic source. Normally its effects are only local to the area of the springs and those who fall into them, but somehow an alien virus was mutated with this magic and is now being spread world wide. The alien part of the virus unfortunately renders muggle medicine ineffective while the chaotic nature of the curse magic prevents magical warding against the now magical virus." She looked around and explained, "The initial symptoms are mildly flu like, usually including a slight fever and sniffles. Unfortunately, by the time these symptoms appear, the person has been contagious to those around him for at least 12 hours. Eventually, usually several days to a week later, the victim will begin to sneeze with progressing violence. The sneezes will end only after the first gender transformation has occurred. Initially the change will be locked for a period of several days or weeks depending on several factors including the age of the patient. It should be noted that the younger the patient, the faster the virus effects proceed. Once the virus has run its course, the change in most cases is controlled by the application of hot or cold water. There are rare cases where the gender change is random - being set for the day upon wakening each morning and even rarer, the change is controlled solely by the will of the person."

She paused a moment and then added with a wry grin, "There were literally hundreds of potential transformation curses at Jusenkyo. The virus could be causing those affected to transform into pigs, cats, pandas, ducks . . . well, you get the idea. Fortunately, the virus-curse is limited to only a gender transformation." She looked out into the shocked faces facing her, "In summary, if you get the virus, it will cause you to change sex with cold water. It cannot be cured, it's being spread worldwide and I do not know of any wards that can prevent its spread."

The excited babble of fearful and angry voices died off as a soft chuckle seemed to cut across it.

"Remus?" questioned Albus, "Is there something funny about this situation?"

"Yep!" the graying werewolf snickered, "It seems that the virus is a partial cure for Lycanthropy." Seeing the astounded faces glaring at him he explained, "There are were-folk in Japan and it was soon noted that the transformed person, though a different gender was no longer a werewolf either." He added, "Were-folk are actively doing all they can to spread the virus among themselves."

"TREASON!" yelled several ministerial representatives simultaneously.

"Bull!" Remus replied, "You forbid us from holding jobs, marrying or having children but you sure as hell are not going to prevent us from being cured!" He grinned widely, fangs showing, "Besides, our new forms are no longer bound to those legal limitations either."

A sinister laugh drew their attention to another 'dark' creature. Demitri, a well known elder vampire reputed to be a hunter of vampire hunters softly observed, "While this virus has no affect on my peoples, we are amused by its affects. I confess that some of the 'unruly' elements of my peoples have assisted in its spread."

A gaily dressed and somewhat foppish man stood up. Seeing as he had their attention he lisped, "Nor are they the only ones. While most of the world sees this virus as a curse, those of the transgender, gay and lesbian communities see this as a blessing of unimaginable proportions." He sat down to a shocked silence.

Alastor Moody stood with a heavy clump of his wooden leg drawing attention to himself. "There are worse problems," he grumped. He rocked over to where Madame Pomfrey had stood and began to explain. "This damned magic can't be hidden from the muggles and our whole world is on the verge of being exposed."

"Preposterous!" snarled Fudge, "If you weren't already retired, I'd fire you for that incompetent comment."

Moody smiled, a sight not for the faint of heart considering his scars. He mused aloud, "I wonder if you will be a squib when the virus hits you?" Fudge sat down, shock freezing his tongue. "I was in contact with some of the unspeakables from the Japanese MoM. They have discovered that a person's magical inheritance and powers are governed by genes that just happen to be on the X and Y chromosomes." Seeing their confusion, he snickered, "Your magical genes are sex linked!"

"Ah shit!" Everyone's eyes swiveled in disbelief to Madame Pomfrey. She blushed brightly but explained, "If what Alastor is saying is true, then that means your magical signature could dramatically change when you do."

"Gets worse," the old warrior gruffly added. "There's been enough Japanese folk affected that significant trends can be mapped. In the normal magical population, almost 10 percent will become squibs; purebloods get off a bit easier at half that or 5 percent. Of course the reverse is true in the muggle population. Muggles that have a magical kin such as a child or cousin have a 10 percent chance of gaining magical powers. Squibs have almost a 50-50 chance of that as well. The general muggle population though has only about seven in ten-thousand chance of being affected magically which means there could be about four million new untrained muggle-born witches and wizards if the so called Nerima virus continues to spread." He sighed and added, "The very worse effect though is magical. It seems that in the same way the curse removes the magical affect of were-wolves, it also erases past magic affects if they are lingering in nature." Seeing that most of them didn't understand he explained, "When someone undergoes the gender transformation, it removes all previous lingering magic. That means it cancels out an Imperio curse, or a memory charm or a love potion or a healing spell as well." He added, "Well, only if the healing spell is recent. Only the lingering magic effects are negated."

"Muggles?" whispered McGonagall. "Does that mean that all the memory charms that have been done over the years will become undone?"

"Yep," Moody grunted, "and it's already causing havoc. Let's say that some less than honorable magical folk have been stealthy executed by armed neighbors that have suddenly remembered raped daughters and other such things." He sneered at the minister, "It suddenly seems the magical government is being called on the carpet for how poorly it has policed itself recently."

Fudge blanched at the idea of millions of irate armed muggles after his head. His attention was caught by a widely grinning goblin. "What the hell are you grinning at?" he snarled.

"Oh, I was just thinking of some of the more, ah, 'pureblood' edicts that you have recently forced on the British wizarding world," the goblin sneered.

Fudge started to snarl a reply when his face lost all color. "NO, I won't allow that. I am my family heir."

"Not when you become female you won't be," the goblin sing-songed with almost a hint of glee. "By the way, just for information, goblins are not affected by the virus."

"Nor are centaurs," interjected Frenize.

Dumbledore noticed the puzzled look on Hagrid's face, "Hagrid, do you have something to add?"

"No sar," the half-giant muttered. He scratched his head and muttered loudly, "Was just thinking 'bot tha centaurs. Makes sense da aft end woun't be changed by ta virus since tis a horse, but I'hm shor glad ta front end ain't either. Might be strange to see ah stallion with a woman's bit's up front ya know?"

Frenize's was not the only face to turn greenish at that thought.


Dumbledore turned to his left and arched an eyebrow in question to the head of the Ravenclaw house, "Yes Filius? You have a question?"

"Not really," the short man replied, "It just occurred to me that Luna's father had port-keyed from Japan to Hogwarts when he was notified that she had been part of that fiasco at the Department of mysteries last week. He left for home a bit early because of illness and as she was entering the Hogwarts express to go home yesterday, I noticed that Luna was starting to sniffle. If she was ill with this virus, then I suspect that the whole train would likely be exposed by now." He paused, "You know, I don't feel all that well myself." He then sneezed and in moments the hall was empty except for himself and the various non-human folk.

Remus walked over and held out a hand to the height impaired professor who was now sitting on the floor, "What say we go get a few butter-beers while you sneeze my way a few times?"

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Author's note: The Jusenkyo creation explanation is total fabrication on my part as an exercise of my imagination since it isn't explained in the Ranma sources.

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