"Are you guys positive this is the hotel we're supposed to be staying in?" Dave Batista asked his co-workers and friends, as he pulled their 16-passenger van to a stop in front of a creepy-looking hotel called Blackshore Manor. They all got out of the van to stretch their legs.
"Well, it has the same name as the one Vince gave us, Blackshore Manor," Eddie Guerrero said, pointing to the old, faded sign in front of them as evidence. "That's not a common name, so yeah, ese, I'm thinking this is it."
"There's no way in hell that I'm staying in there," Stephanie McMahon screeched.
"Just chill out, babe. I'm sure it'll be ok," Triple H told his wife.
"Look at it. Sorry, no way!" Stephanie shrieked.
Everyone looked at the hotel. It looked like it came straight out of a horror movie. It had the custom hanging shingles, broken windows, and high weeds. It basically had a dreary, sad appearance. It was huge, seemingly unoccupied, and it looked like it could contain the portal to hell somewhere deep inside. No light touched it, and so everything was covered in dark shadows.
"That hotel is not meant for a princess of my caliber," Stephanie said in a snobby voice.
"Oh, but it's high class for a slut like you," Chris Jericho muttered, just loud enough for her to hear. Next to him, fellow Canadian Edge giggled.
Stephanie gasped. "Hunter, did you hear what he just said to me?"
"I'll take care of it. Stay here!" Triple H walked over to Jericho. "You will not call my wife names anymore, understand? Good!" he exclaimed in a voice loud enough for Stephanie to hear. In a lower voice, he added, "Good one, Chris. Keep it up." Then he smiled and walked back over to his bitch...er...his wife. "All taken care of."
Shawn Michaels watched Triple H and Stephanie and shook his head. He wondered why Stephanie was so blind to the real reason why Triple H was with her. He was an ass and he didn't deserve her. She could do a hell of a lot better, starting with Shawn! Why did she put up with Triple H's shit when she could have a life without it? Why-
"Shawn, didn't you feel that?" John Cena asked in a worried voice.
Shawn shook his head and looked up, wondering why the whole group of wrestlers were gathered around him in a circle, looking down at him. "What the fuck is everyone looking at?" he asked, rubbing his jaw because for some reason it was starting to hurt. "And why am I on the ground?"
"Some weird assclown just ran by and hit you in the jaw with this," Jericho said, pointing at an old, crusty toilet seat lying right next to Shawn.
"Yeah, ese, and whoever it was knocked you the fuck out!" Eddie laughed.
"I'm glad you think my misfortunes are funny," Shawn said, sitting up and glaring at Eddie. "Thanks for your concern, chica," he added sarcastically.
"Hey, I'm not a chica! Soy un hombre! I'm your papi!" Eddie yelled.
"Wow, Eddie, I never knew you were old enough to have a kid Shawn's age," Stacy Keibler commented, and Torrie Wilson nodded her head in agreement.
"Yeah," Torrie agreed. "I always thought you were, like, totally young!"
Ashley, the 2005 Diva Search winner, shook her head. "Dumb bitches," she mumbled.
"Oh, I am young," Eddie said, smiling an evil smile. He put an arm around Stacy and an arm around Torrie. "Let me show you how young I am, mamacitas!" He started to lead the two women off but was intercepted by The Undertaker.
"We don't know our surroundings yet. We have to stick together, at least for now," Taker told him.
"Oh come on, ese, the three of us were about to stick together, if you know what I mean," Eddie said, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Too damn bad. Now you're not going anywhere," Taker said, giving him a dark look, daring him to argue with him.
"And who appointed you boss?" Eddie wanted to know. "You're not el cangri."
"It's a known fact that he's the boss," Ashley said, walking up to join the conversation. "I mean, look at him with his awesome body, all these tattoos, those kissable lips..."
"Sounds like someone has a little crush on the Deadman," Batista observed. (A/N: He's always the observant one.)
"The married Deadman," Taker pointed out, but he winked at Ashley. She beamed. Then he looked at everyone else. "Now I don't know what the hell the psycho Vince McMahon thinks he's pulling by making us come here, but for sure he's up to something wicked."
"Hey, don't talk about my father!" Stephanie exclaimed. "He's the one who cuts your checks, you know. You should be grateful."
"He's the one who should be grateful that we all don't kick his ass," Taker said.
"My dad is a man of high moral standing. He is possibly one of the best men in the history of...of, well, everything!" Stephanie said proudly.
"And probably one of the only men you've never slept with," Jericho piped up. He put a finger to his chin and a thoughtful look appeared on his face. "Or have you?"
"Loser!" Stephanie shouted.
"What'd I tell you, man?" Triple H called over to Jericho, but when Stephanie wasn't looking, he gave Jericho a thumbs up and mouthed, "Nice!"
Shawn stood up. "Let's just explore the place and see whether or not we should stay here," he said. "Because I really want to find the assclown that hit me in the face with a toiletseat."
"Hey, assclown is my word!" Jericho complained.
"Because that's what you are," Stephanie muttered, but he ignored her.
"Calm down, people," Taker said. They all got quiet. "Now we're wrestlers, right? We're brave people, stronger than many. There's nothing here that could possibly scare us or hurt us much, right?" They all nodded in agreement. "So I say, let's split into two groups of six and explore this place."
"You know in horror movies whenever they split up they almost always get killed, right?" Batista pointed out.
"This isn't a horror movie, ese," Eddie said, rolling his eyes. "Go on, Taker."
"Group one will consist of Shawn, Hunter, Stephanie, Jericho, Edge, and Stacy. I'm appointing Shawn leader of the group," Taker said. There was immediate protesting, but he went on. "Group two will consist of me, Batista, Eddie, Ashley, Torrie, and John. And I'm appointing myself as leader of this group. Any questions?" He gave them all an ominous look.
"Do I have to be in the same group as Chris Jericho, Taker?" Stephanie asked. "I mean, can't I be in your group?"
"Only if Torrie Wilson wants to trade places with you," Taker replied.
Everyone looked at Torrie. Ashley crossed her fingers.
"No," Torrie said, smiling sweetly at Ashley. "I want to stay in this group."
"Damn," Ashley muttered, glaring at Torrie. "The bitch just won't leave!"
Stephanie frowned, but didn't protest. She knew better than to argue with The Undertaker.
"Well then it's all set. We can meet back here in..." Taker looked at his watch and realized it wasn't working. "Yeah, my watch isn't working, but in about an hour."
Everyone looked at their watches and realized they weren't working. They pulled out their cell phones but had no signal.
"I have a bad feeling about this place," Edge said, speaking for the first time since they'd arrived. They all looked at him. "A very bad feeling..."
Who should die or "disappear" first? I have someone in mind but your opinion counts! FYI, The Undertaker can't die so don't vote for him. I won't kill him. LOL! Here are all the people you can choose from: Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, Chris Jericho, Edge, Stacy Keibler, Dave Batista, Eddie Guerrero, Ashley, Torrie Wilson, and John Cena. Hurry up and vote:-)