AN: I did this little dialogue piece months ago anddecided to post it! It's just a shameless little piece of Rendall fluff and Ihope you like! Remember, read and review or I'll be sad and weepy!

Pipes

"Kendall?"

"What?"

"Is this… gum?"

"I thought it might work… did it?"

"No, Kendall, gum did not stop the leak on this pipe."

"Oh… sorry."

"…"

"What did you just say?"

"Nothing… nothing… nothing at all."

"So… what are you doing right now?"

"I'm trying to get the gum off the pipe."

"Want your tool belt?"

"Kendall… I don't need to use the stupid tool belt."

"…"

"Kendall… I don't need it."

"But… I like the tool belt…"

"Go get the tool belt…

"Here you go!"

"Kendall… why were you sitting on it?"

"I thought you might need it."

"…"

"What was that?"

"Nothing… nothing at all…"

"Here, let me take that icky shirt off you."

"Kendall…"

"There you go! Ah, much better right? Good… good, good… now put the tool belt on."

"Kendall…"

"Put the goddamn tool belt on, Ryan."

"Okay."

"It looks very nice."

"Uh-huh."

"What are you doing now?"

"I'm still pulling the gum off the pipes… is this special super-gum or something?"

"Nope, it's the stuff David made special for the Fusion parties… you know, the one Greenlee gave me some of."

"Oh for… I need a knife or something."

"Oh… hold on… here!"

"Aaaah!"

"What? What!"

"Don't do that!"

"Don't do what!"

"Don't lunge at somebody helpless under a sink with a glittering blade at hand! And, also, don't do that while you're grinning like a female psychopath!"

"Oh… sorry."

"…"

"Okay, I heard it that time and that was very rude."

"…"

"Butt-head."

"Butt-monkey."

"Butt-brain."

"Beautiful."

"Would you stop that? You're making me blush."

"I love it when you blush."

"…"

"What was that, Kendall?"

"Nothing… nothing at all."

"Kendall?"

"Huh?"

"How much of this goddamn gum did you put on here?"

"Well, gee, Ryan, I wasn't exactly calm! It was crazy! Water was going everywhere and Simone was screaming that a shark was gonna get her and I just couldn't think of anything else!"

"…"

"Ryan."

"…"

"Ryan!"

"…"

"Stop laughing, damn it!"

"I'm— I'm trying— Simone thought a shark was gonna eat her?"

"She was really terrified, Ryan; she kept hitting the sink with her shoes."

"How— how many drinks—"

"You're still laughing!"

"Can you blame me!"

"… well… no…"

"…"

"Actually, she had mostly Tequila… but she really enjoyed the Screaming Orgasm I brought her…"

"…"

"Ryan… are you having a seizure?"

"No— I'm— I'm fine… really… did you give her that Screaming Orgasm?"

"Moron…"

"…"

"Oh… god… now you're giggling!"

"… uh-oh…"

"What? What?"

"Watch out!"

"Aaaah!"

"You told me you shut off the water, Kendall!"

"Pick me up, pick me up, pick me up!"

"You're already soaked!"

"Pick me up, pick me up, pick me— Thank you."

"…"

"Are you mad at me?"

"The entire kitchen is completely soaked… we're both soaked and, on top of that, I have some kind of demonic gum stuck under my fingernails!"

"You're butt looks very nice from where I'm hanging."

"Excuse me?"

"Your butt… you know, your ass. It looks very nice from here!"

"You are seriously warped, you know that?"

"No, really, Ryan, it looks absolutely incredible!"

"Well… that's very… whoa!"

"Sorry… did I pinch you too hard?"

"Uh… yes."

"Uh… sorry."

"That is definitely going to bruise, Kendall."

"I said I'm sorry!"

"Who said you should be sorry?"

"You're very bad."

"And you love it."

"Yes… I really, really do."

"As much as you love me?"

"…"

"Why are you giggling again?"

"You pinched my ass and I liked it."

"So?"

"Shouldn't there be something wrong with that?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"Well, see, Ryan, I've always loved having a nice pinch on my butt… as long as it's someone I trust."

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course… Ooh!"

"That was kind of fun."

"Really? Why?"

"I don't know… really… I can't quite figure that out… yet."

"Why don't we just go to your place?"

"Gave up on the pipes so easily?"

"I was thinking more along the lines of my pipes…"

"Do you have any idea of incredibly…?"

"Dorky that sounded? Oh, yeah, I do!"

"So why do I like that dorky line so much?"

"Because you love me?"

"Oh… well... that explains it… so… my place?"

"Yep."

"Good… let's go have some fun with my pipes."

"That is such a dorky line Kendall… whoa!"

"Sorry… couldn't resist."

Finis