I look at the metal, Then at the flesh

One simple strike, And it all washes away

In a world damned to hell there is no escape

Except this…

But do I dare? Do I dare take this drastic step?

To end it all! To take the ending blow?

The coward in me emerges as I cast the knife upon the floor. No! I dare not! I can't do it. No matter how much I would want to! The loneliness inside me must still see some hope.

I take the steel in my shaking hand once again.

I must! All the people I ever hurt.

All the things I've done. I can never give that back.

I place the weapon at the base of my arm near my elbow. I can't… No matter how many lives I've taken. I know this wouldn't do much.

Even taking one more life…

Though it's my own…

Killing myself would atone for all those I've taken

I could never repay my debt…

So it must be done…

I slid the knife across my arm. The skin barely breaking. I stuck again in the same place before. This time blood spilled down. I went up closer to my wrist. Cutting once again. If another man could see my eyes, he would know I was un-human. I couldn't be of this would.

A third cut graced my arm as a sadistic smile dance upon my face.

Yes! Just as before! When I saw their blood…

I lost control…

Didn't even know what I was doing…

I cut them countless times. Feeding off their screams…

Off their pain… And their blood…

The slayer Sango… And the Monk Miroku..

Yes I did it!

It fueled me to go on until their bodies lay motionless…

The ground & river stained with the fluid gold…

A laugh erupted from my dry throat as I sank down. I cut up my forearm and now I made it to the veins. I gazed at them long and hard. I swiftly drew the knife across. I smiled as the vital life flowed from me freely.

If you could have seen the demon I had become…

Yes I ogt as I wished, but at a price…

The families I destroyed, the children I took no mercy upon…

And the one I love…

How you would have hated me…

And yet the very thing I lived for…

Drove me to insanity…