And It Hits The Fan

Kat Potter

Disclaimer: I do not own anything in the Potter-verse, so ergo; I am not making any money from this.

An: Now Beta'ed!

Chapter 1 – It starts

In a dark room at 4 Privet Drive, at 4 in the morning, there sat a boy on his bed. He had jet-black, all-over-the-place hair, sparkling emerald eyes and a very famous, lightning shaped scar. His name was Harry Potter. This Harry Potter was unusual in several ways. He was an orphan. He lived with his Aunt and Uncle who despised him. He spent 10 years of his life living in a cupboard. And he was a wizard. That's right, a wand-waving wizard. But that wasn't even enough. On no, the fates decided that he should be more unusual. See, even in the wizarding world he's not normal. He's the-boy-who-lived. The one that defeated the Dark Lord at the tender age of one. Of course, that wasn't the last Harry saw of Mr. I'm-an-Evil-Dark-Lord-so-fear-me. Nope, he had met him again, five times. And out of those five times, twice people had died. First Cedric Diggory, then Sirius Black, his Godfather, who was supposed to free him from those wretched Dursley's, just as soon as they caught that stupid rat, Pettigrew. The year after Sirius' death had been horrible. He had been so terribly depressed, that he had barely been able to go on. He had, for the most part, retreated into his shell. Oh, he continued playing Quidditch and studied fairly well, but he seemed to just lose his spark. No joking around with Ron. No horseplay in the dorm with the other guys. He even stopped rising to Malfoy's bait, just ignored him. At first this had outraged Malfoy, that he should be ignored, but when Harry didn't respond to even the most outrageous baiting, he slowly lost interest. Something had to be done, something that would shake him out of his slump. Of course, what else but another round with Old Moldie Voldie.

Harry had decided to go to Hogsmeade alone. It was just after exams and he just wanted to get out and think. That, and Ron and 'Mione had just gotten together and he figured that they'd probably like some alone time together, so he wandered through Hogsmeade, trying to get his mind off things. Things like Voldie, and Sirius and it worked, in a way. His mind was so far off that he didn't notice he'd wandered into a seedy part of Hogsmeade. Didn't notice the Death Eater in front of him until the bright red light caught his eye a second before he was stunned. When he had woken up, he had been in what looked like a torture chamber with the Dark Lord himself. Then the torturing had begun. Harry got to know whips, chains, spikes, red hot pokers, taunts about him and his loved ones, curses about as dark as they could get, just about anything Voldie and his Death Eaters could think of. The days passed in a haze of pain. Not that Harry actually knew how much time had passed. Every now and then, he would pass out from the pain, only to wake up again, either naturally or magically, so to him it felt like an eternity had passed. Later he was told that it had only been about 3 days. During one session, with the bitch, Bellatrix Lestrange, he had been about to pass out, when out of the corner of his eye, he saw something move. He passed out before he could find out what it was, but when he woke up, he found himself to be staring at the white ceiling of the infirmary.

Once again Harry's life changed drastically. To put it bluntly, he had had enough. The stupid fucker had put him through too much, he just wasn't going to take it anymore. He wasn't going to take any shit from anybody. Not Voldie or Dumbledore or his fucking Uncle. He was going to take his life into his own hands. To Harry, this meant it was time to train. Now more time to waste fucking around, so as soon as he got home, he started studying. He completely memorized his old textbooks and by the time his birthday came around, it was time to expand his knowledge into different realms. In fact, that time had just come around about 4 hours ago. He just had some beef to pick with his Uncle and then he could leave.

Now you might be wondering why a 17-year-old boy would be awake in the middle of the night, especially considering that most boys that age enjoy sleeping very much. As usual, it was a dream that woke Harry up. He was used to having dreams. Most of them would rather be classified as a nightmare. Most of those were visions from Voldemort, visions of torture and murder. Those that weren't were usually recurring nightmares revolving around the horrors he'd seen. Cedric's death, Sirius's death, his parent's death, and the torture at the hands of Voldemort only about a month ago. But not tonight. Recently he had been having dreams of an entirely different kind, an erotic kind. Now, he knew that he was a teenage boy and that it was normal for him to have these dreams, but still, did he have to have them about him? The latest dream had been especially intense and it gave him a hard on just thinking about it...

The dream had been full of hands stroking him everywhere and silken ties and blindfolds, his lover touching what felt like every single nerve in his body. The feeling of being so full had been wonderful, if only he could get that feeling in real life. And even though he had been blindfolded, he knew who his lover was, the dark and mysterious man he had, for some reason, developed feelings for. Severus Snape.

Harry had awoken screaming that name, covered in his seed. As he thought about it, his hand slid down his torso and stroked his member. He stroked it harder and harder and was soon pumping furiously with need until finally, he came into his hand, spreading his seed for the second time that night.

This really was ridiculous. For heaven's sake, he was fantasizing over his greasy git, snarky bastard, potions professor. Don't forget dead sexy, a little voice in his head added. All right, the man might be a tad bit sexy, but still, he was his potions professor! There was no way anything could happen between them because, let's face it, the man despised him. Not to mention that fact that it would be a teacher/student relationship, which was highly frowned upon. So Harry just had to get his mind on other things and forget about Snape.

Harry finally pushed away all thoughts of his professor and concentrated on his plans for the day. His Uncle would be up soon and he had to be ready when he was, so he went and got dressed and started changing his appearance since it would obviously be a problem for him to go as Harry Potter. First he changed his hair. He lengthened it by a few inches and changed the color into a dirty blonde. He then changed his eye color to a piercing blue and placed a temporary sight correcting charm on his eyes. He also changed his skin color to a much lighter tone. His own was very tanned from working outside a lot. He tied a black bandanna round his forehead so his scar wouldn't show as no amount of concealment charms would work on it. He then sat on his bed, twirling his wand in a rather threatening way.

So, here he was, waiting for morning to come so he could finally get his revenge on his fucking Uncle for the horrible life he'd had to live here at the Dursleys. And maybe his Aunt and Cousin too. Oh, this had the potential to be very entertaining.

Finally! he thought to himself, as he heard his Uncle getting up and practically thunder down the stairs. The stupid lump is up at last. Now he's walking into the kitchen. And 3...2...1...

"Boy! Get down here and make us our breakfast, you ungrateful piece of shit!"

He could hear his Uncle thundering up the stairs so he could punish his Nephew for not being fast enough. Vernon Dursley tore open the door to Harry's bedroom. A smarter man might have been a bit worried about the grin that was plastered onto Harry's face, but unfortunately, for Vernon that is, he wasn't smart in the least.

"Didn't you hear what I said! Get the fuck into the kitchen and make breakfast before Dudley starves to death!"

Harry mentally snorted before he answered. "No."

For a moment his Uncle stared at him. "What did you say?"

"I said no. I'm not going to make you or your disgustingly fat son breakfast. Or your toothpick wife for that matter, though Merlin knows she could use some fattening. Unlike you two. And there's nothing you can do to make me."

He could see his Uncle turning purple in the face. "How dare you insult me and my family! You little freak. I'll teach you to..." He had just noticed that Harry was still twirling his wand between his fingers. "Get that freakish thing out of my sight! You think you can threaten me! You can't use magic, you said so before. The nuthouse will kick you out!"

Harry chuckled softly. For a reason that Vernon couldn't fathom, the sound sent a shiver up his spine.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, dear Uncle but, no, the 'nuthouse' will not be expelling me anytime soon. First of all, I am too important in this war to be expelled. You remember the bastard that killed my parents?" Vernon inclined his head ever so slightly. "Well, it turns out that I have to kill him. Therefore, they need me to learn everything I can before I meet him or the whole world is doomed. That includes you, by the way." He smirked, in a rather Malfoy-ish way, making his Uncle swallow rather hard. I can't believe I used a Malfoy trick. If he ever finds out, I'll never hear the end of it, he thought. "And second, in the wizarding world, I'm of age, so I can use magic whenever I want. And believe me, I won't hesitate if I feel the need."

"O-on second thought I'd better ask Petty to make breakfast today. Will you be j-joining us?"

"No, I'm going shopping. I don't know when I'll be back." And he walked out of his room, down the stairs, out the door and apparated to Diagon Alley with a loud 'Crack!'

His Uncle harrumphed before muttering, "always knew it was him that made that noise. Freak."


An: Ok, since I got booted off of this site 'cuz the dream scene was too graphic, I toned it down. So, is that good or is it still too much? Plz tell me so I can fix it, I don't want to get deleted again. :(

And as always, Reviews are very much welcome!