Disclaimer: I own neither gundam wing, any of its characters :sniff:?
Hi again, it occurs to me that this won't be up for a while. Reviews inspire me to write, even if it's just a short sentence. I even like getting flames if you think my writing sucks, constructive though, so I can improve. I'm basing the characters on what I've seen of the Japanese version (they were originally different and cooler)
Not Allowing Forever part II
Tenshi laid on his cot, staring at the ceiling's many water bubbles and paint chips. One of the springs was poking through the cheap, lumpy, cotton cot into his lower back. That was easily fixable later. For right now he just toyed with this thought in his mind:
What does a soldier do when there's no war?
He had truly believed and convinced himself that he had no purpose outside of being a soldier. He thought mankind would always find something to war over. He thought he would never be free.
After the war though he realized that he didn't want to fight, he was tired of killing.
That left the question: Without war, who am I?
That was what he was trying to figure out. After the war he had searched for his family mostly, some ties that he could go back to… but they didn't exist, he had few memories other than being trained (and raised) by Dr. J. When it became apparent Earth was not affirmed in their decision of peace he called up Duo, who had been doing who knows what, and they kinda moved in together, looking out for trouble. Then trouble came. But that's another story…
There was some one who believed in him as a person; a kind person worth the time and effort of caring for, and boy did he make it hard for her. Not even Duo would go as far as to think of him as 'kind', Heero didn't help there either. Duo understood him, as a guy and as a Gundam pilot. But she… she was always there.
He couldn't do it though, he couldn't stay around. She cared for him, and he finally accepted that he cared for her but she had her own life without him. His life couldn't revolve around her like it would have because he had nothing else; it was too much of a bother. She couldn't help him find himself… only he could do that.
Standing there, looking at her deliver her new proposal for peace. He always saw strength in her, he stood there admiring her. She used to be a spoiled brat. Over sentimental and easily manipulated, through the war he saw her develop strength, courage and determination. Sometimes he saw things in her that he himself lacked. It became a goal to surpass her, to better himself. It didn't work though, nor was it healthy, that's why he needed to better himself on his own.
She had found her true identity, she was her own now. He had also seen how she hid behind her name and used it to give her strength. It was the Mariemaya incident that he noticed the change. She found her own strength; she wasn't just a Peacecraft, she was herself, Relena. She had a self.
He, did not. He might have joined the Preventers with Wufei except he had sworn never to kill again. Killing was meaningless, and it had nothing to offer him. He realized that if you built yourself around killing, as he had, it hollowed you, as he was. He couldn't be a soldier anymore; or at least not if he had nothing to fight for. But then:
What do I have to live for?
Killing himself would have been the easy way out. But he just couldn't do it. He owed so much, he still needed to do right in the world; it was impossible for him to forgive himself for everything but perhaps he could earn the forgiveness of that little girl, Noventa and his family. He would have been abandoning a universe that could use his help.
Who, then, to help? He would not fight meaninglessly, however, he could still help the colonies. So he chose a colony that he could relate to. A part of it was mostly Japanese and a third of that was quarantined. Where he was heading was in pretty bad shape, each colony had its share. Where there are the very rich, there are the very poor, and a large gap in between.
What better place to find himself and help people in need?
When he arrived, he simply blended in with the rest of the nameless poor. He helped when he could by stopping muggings, got money to those who needed it and also, more and more frequently it seemed, he got the sick to hospitals.
This gave him a lot of time to think, sure; but it wasn't enough. Honest work was infrequent in his section of the colony. When everyone was as poor as they were there, SM thrived.
The only other job one could get was a political one, SM stayed away from politics, they didn't get sucked into the war either and they avoided most of all Romafeller, even though most higher members were also rich.
SM controlled most of the business, when the opportunity came for a no strings job… people generally took it. He was no different.
Perhaps he was. He wouldn't have taken the job from some one who needed it, but this one was special. It was more of a volunteer program; initiated and run by the people, funded by the government. He wasn't paid money, in exchange for doing the work, which included everything from physical labor to baby-sitting, he was given a home, three meals a day and unbeknownst to most, redemption.
This brought thoughts to his current situation. He lie in a two bedroom apartment, ground floor, with an old Japanese lady and her three grandchildren. The old woman's name was Seiko but she was called 'baa-chan or in his case, 'baa-san.
The three children were all younger than he. The oldest was ten, he had either very dark brown or black hair and mahogany eyes. His two little twin sisters, both five had similar traits: round young faces, straight hair and similar voices. One could tell the trio was related. Touji, the boy, had a playfully suave personality. He didn't like to, "Play with baby girls." And he happened to like wrestling.
The two younger girls were much more… hyper. Both were very friendly and clung to Tenshi everywhere calling him 'Onii-chan!'. At first it was rather bothersome, he would come out of his room and all of a sudden the two girls collided into him; each holding an arm. Then they would fight over who loved him more although he had done nothing to deserve their affection.
He never had the experience of being around small children before. He would immediately tense up, ready for battle and catch himself ready to hurt them. Primarily Dr. J had raised him since he was small. He even had a few memories of his parents but he had never really had to socialize with children.
Of course, he learned, he had to, it was part of his job. One of the programs in the rebuilding project was a nursery and a new education system. That was… fun… Not really. It became tolerable, enjoyable… maybe. Whatever.
And then there was Yuuki. Her name, like her personality, meant courage and snow. Not ice, snow. Yuuki. Yuuki was. Yuuki was so hard to understand. Tenshi supposed all women were. But she was so complicated, happy one moment, determined the next and, so to speak, playful?
Yuuki lived in the floor above him, alone in what wasn't really an apartment so much as a room. She came downstairs to shower, cook, eat, watch TV and use the bathroom. She was an orphan so she was also very lonely, he saw her quite often. Baa-san said that when Tenshi moved in she started spending even more time downstairs.
Yuuki was the one that had seen him on the streets. She was one of the first to join in the project, she was very active in the community and most people knew her. When she saw a face she didn't know she offered him the job. She said it was because, "You looked like an honest, hard-worker, you were in shape and relatively well fed. And," she winked, "I know under all that grime and hair, you're cute." She was extremely friendly and, like Duo or Relena, his glares couldn't stop her from advancing. Also like Duo or Relena, she would not give up.
This however, was a whole different type of friendly. She made flirtatious jokes without sarcasm or modesty. She didn't show much serious attraction but he was confused none the less. Everyone used to look to him for his opinion, like he knew all the answers. But he always tried not to socialize, don't get attached to people, don't feel emotions; there were few people in his life that wouldn't give up on him until he was their 'friend'. He practically lived with Yuuki and although he could shut her out, why would he want to?
Tenshi admitted he felt something for her; but sometimes he shut her out because she confused him. But she was also so hard to stay mad at. Arg! It was frustrating. Tenshi sat up in bed in one swift motion and yawned. He glanced at a clock next to Touji's bed. No wonder he was hungry.
He stood up, crossed the room and opened the door, then he braced himself…
Nothing happened. He poked his head out and looked around for Mariko or Rei, they were nowhere to be seen. He was surprised to find that that disappointed him a little. "Baa-san?" He stepped out. "Oi! Baa-san?" Now he was a bit worried.
"Yes? Oh, Tenshi, how are you, done with your nap?" He heard her from in the kitchen. Tenshi turned a corner and saw her making soup, he smiled.
"Ah, I'm done. Where is everyone?" He leaned over the short woman shoulder and sniffed the soup. He became even more hungry and tried to steal a slice of carrot. She swatted his hand.
"Ah! T-t-t. Don't touch. They're at school. Or at least Touji and the twins are. Yuuki should be down any minute. Sit, you make me nervous with your hovering." Seiko indicated a chair at the small table less than a meter away.
Tenshi sat and heard the door open and close as well as light footsteps coming down the stairs. "I think Yuuki should cook more often, she eats it too," as an after thought he added, mumbling, "And she lets me snack."
The old lady's hearing failed her and she didn't hear his remark, "In that case , why don't you cook? Ne?"
"I can cook," Both Tenshi and Yuuki said. Yuuki smiled and Tenshi turned to face her. "Then why don't you?" they both asked, "Because Baa-sama's a better cook. Kiss up," they said in unison. Yuuki cracked up and sat down in her chair backwards.
"So… why are you home today?" she asked, secretly grateful.
"There was no school. They quarantined that section, the new school is being built a little farther away," Tenshi replied.
"K'so, another outbreak? Now I'm gonna have to start walking the children to school again, make sure they don't touch the bodies…" she shivered and Tenshi silently shared her remorse.
After a moment of silence Tenshi spoke up, "So why aren't you in school?"
"Ne, Yuuki, do tell," Baa-san added.
Yuuki narrowed her eyes and frowned at Tenshi, "I, um, failed biology, so I stopped going. Who needs school if you're stupid?"
A large, heavy pot full of hot soup landed heavily on the table with a loud clang. Not a drop spilled, Baa-san was graceful like that, as infuriated as she was. She started yelling in rapid Japanese right in Yuuki's face. She winced with every word. Tenshi was glad he didn't catch it all, but he got the gist. "You are bright! I see you, working so easily with so little time, too much work for you? I'll talk to the sensei and then we'll see who's failing what! You know more about curing disease and where to hit some one in a fight then sensei himself. But this is not his fault, oh no. You don't just give up on school because you didn't try to convince your teacher you were worthy. You will start attending school again, even if you fail every course. I know you're learning, you ARE NOT STUPID!"
"Hai, Seiko-san," Yuuki answered, looking Baa-san in the eye, then looked down.
Baa-san cleared her throat, "Eat."
Yuuki "Ikatakimasu," she said unenthusiastically and began to eat in silence while Baa-san calmly sat down and started on her soup as well.
san: respectful add on to a person, like Mr, or Mrs.
sama: very respectful, like lord, king, refered to with kami(god)
ikatakimasu: lets eat, ready to begin
Took me a while and it's not where I wanted to leave off, but whatever. Hopefully I'll get some more inspiration, and time, to write and more will bve out soon, what do you think?