Know Your Stars
Ame: Yay!!! New reviewers!! ((Iz happeh)) Anyhoo, I started writing this chapter more than a year ago, probably. So the second half may seem to be written in a different style and some of the things may not make sense. To you guys or me. ((Sweatdrop)) Anyhoo. I suppose you guys want to read the chapter now, don't you. Well, in that case, here's Mr. DD with the disclaimer. And I have now decided that his first name is Malvolio like from Twelfth Night by Shakespeare.
Mr. DD: Ame doesn't own the YYH characters or Care Bears but somehow she does own a lock of Kurama's hair.
Kurama: HEY!!! How on earth did she get my hair???
Ame: Uhh…. Internet?
Bucket: ENJOY THE FIC!!! ((Is dragged of by the frantic authoress because Kurama is now chasing her demanding his hair back))
--Chapter some-odd: Botan--
"Hello, and welcome to Cooking With Death! I'm your host, Botan! Let's get started!" Everyone's favorite… Or least favorite blue haired ditz was standing on the stage with only a stool to accompany her. It seems she had not yet noticed that there was no Kitchen, much less food to cook. The audience sat confused while some laughed.
"There's no counter, much less food up there!"
"Hey!!! I just said that!"
"Shut up you Narrator!"
It seems someone couldn't hold their peace.
Botan seemed to not be fazed by the outburst, and continued to dice the imaginary apple with her imaginary knife.
"Uhh… Hello?" The Voice of Doom boomed out across the stage and audience, "Anyone know what on earth Botan is doing?"
Mutters were heard, some in agreement some in confusion. The audience was lost in itself, no ones attention on Botan or the Voice.
"Man this is gunna be a long day," the Voice Muttered "Anyway, let's get this show on the road! Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars….. Botan Something…. In her free time she visits the llama farm…"
"Huh? Who's interrupting my show?" Botan looked up from the imaginary rolling pin and pie crust the apple and knife had turned into. Yummy…. Pie….
"Excuse me? This is my show!"
"Then why did I get a note telling me to come here to film my all new cooking show?"
"To get you here without any problems! Now sit on the stool!"
"But I'm making pie!"
"There's no food up there," yelled the audience, authoress, Kurama, Capitan Jack Sparrow, Robin Hood and the looming Voice.
Botan paused as she looked down at the hands of hers that held nothing. She paused. "You got me there." She sighed and walked over to the stool and sat down. "You were saying?"
"Yes." The voice cleared his throat "Botan something…. "
"Hey! I have a last name!" Botan interrupted
"Then what is it?" The voice challenged.
"Uhh…. Just get on with it."
"Thank you. As I was saying. Botan something… In her free time she visits the Llama farm…"
"Llama farm? Do those exist?"
"Sensui had a llama farm, but that's another story."
"For the record, other than llama farms being rare, I HATE LLAMAS!!!!"
"Aww," the voice sobbed "Why you have to be a llama hater, Botan? What did they do to you?"
"They're… They're… They're llamas."
"Ooh, good reason to hate the llamas. But let's continue. Botan the llama hater…"
"I DON'T HATE LLAMAS!!!!"
"But you just said that you did!"
The voice snickered. "Botan the lying llama hater,"
"GRR!!!! What is it with you????"
"She's cheating on Koenma…."
"Cheating???? WHY WOULD I CHEAT? Wait… KOENMA???!??!?!!! He's barely out of diapers!!"
"She's cheating on Konema with Kaito."
"Kaito??? Ugg…. HE SCARES ME!!!!"
"Then why are you cheating on Koenmea with him? That just seems to make no sense."
"Yeah, well, you make no sense," Botan shook her fist at the ceiling, very frustrated with the voice.
The voice would have smiled if anyone could have seen him. "If I had a nickel for every time I heard that."
"Yeah, how often do you hear it?"
The voice paused before responding. "I'm not sure."
Botan sat their confused. The voice stayed quiet. The audience joined Botan in the land of confusion, awaiting more torments for the blue-haired reaper. Five minutes passed before an inpatient audience member yelled "get on with it, will ya?!"
The voice snickered. "Botan Hoosie-whatsit. She's not really the grim reaper. She's actually a Care Bear in disguise!"
Botan cocked her head to the side in confusion. "A Care Bear?" Botan paused in confusion then testily asked "what Care Bear am I?"
The voice grinned cheerfully, not that it mattered since anyone could see him anyway. "You're Death Bear!"
"How on earth does that one work out," Botan angrily yelled back before going off on a tangent about how she helps souls get to the afterlife, she doesn't kill them, etc.
"And now you know Botan, Death Bear in disguise so that she can secretly visit the llama farms!"
Ame: How was that? I even got it up before Thanksgiving, too!
Bucket: Yeah, fantastic.
Ame: Yeah, well, no one likes you. Ever wonder why no one mentions you in their reviews?
Bucket: Yeah, well… Well… YOUR MOM!
Ame: What about my mother?
Bucket: … I dunno.
Ame: Exactly. Now, everyone! Read and review, please! Oh, and if you want to see me do a certain character, feel free to suggest someone! And I have a fantastic torture for Itsuki… MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, and cookies to those who review! LOVES!