Chapter 5, now! No intro, gogogogogogogogogogogogo!
Chapter 5: The Remedy
Angry Naru immediately charged Anti-Naru, and throw a punch at each other at the same time, connecting. Both lose their mouthpieces.
Kanako: (still holding off a brain-washed Motoko) Alright, enough with the Tomorrow Joe references. Excel Saga slammed that into the ground.
Easygoing Naru (still sleeping): …fourth wall..zzzzzz…
Sexy Naru: Could someone make her stop that? She isn't Snoozer from Hamtaro.
Naru: NO MORE REFERENCES! JUST GET ON WITH IT!
Kanako: Alright then. SHORYUKEN! (uses said move on Motoko, knocking her unconscious)
Naru: What did I say? NO. MORE. REFERENCES. I'm sick of this! I just want this fight to be over so Keitaro and I can consummate our relationship!
That comment had everybody stop in their tracks. Angry Naru and Anti-Naru were frozen in position, about to punch each other again, and staring at Naru.
Anti-Naru: Well. I say, it's about time you tell everyone what you really wanted.
Anti-Naru lights a cigarette.
Keitaro: Huh? Since when did Naru smoke? Oh, right. You're the evil Naru. I guess that makes sense.
Anti-Naru: No, Keitaro. I'm not Naru.
She reaches under her neck, and pulls off her face, revealing...
Keitaro: Aunt Haruka!
Haruka, once again, knocks Keitaro upside the head for calling her "Aunt".
Haruka: Apparently, Seta's plan worked. Motoko, you can stop that now.
Motoko got up and rubbed her neck.
Motoko: Haruka-san, you could've warned me before the last minute that we were doing this.
Kanako: Admit it, you enjoyed it.
Motoko: (blushes a tiny bit) No!
Keitaro: Wait a minute. WHAT'S GOING ON!
Su: Silly, it was all a test! A test to see if you both cared for each other!
Naru: Wait. Then, what about my other selves? Don't tell me that they're pretending to be me.
Su: Naw, they're real. Like I said before, they're just facets of your full personality. And they all like Keitaro too, so in conclusion, you must like him as well. (grins a bit)
Keitaro: For some reason, I feel like Shinji Ikari at the end of the Evangelion anime series. "Congrats Shinji, you destroyed humanity! You pass!"
Haruka: Well, not everything is solved. We need to come up with a solution as to what to do with these other six Naru(e?)s. We can't keep them around here, since the repair bill and living expenses will be sky high.
Smart Naru: …we were just part of some test?
Kanako: Uh, yes. Did your brain go on auto-pilot after hearing that?
Smart Naru stood there, not saying anything, as did Angry Naru. Then, both entered a furious state not seen by any of the Hinata Housers.
Smart Naru: BULLSHIT! I THOUGHT THIS PLACE WAS IN DANGER OF BEING RIPPED APART BY A TEMPORAL DISTORTION! AND NOW-
Angry Naru: AFTER ALL THAT, AFTER GOING INTO A HUGE BRAWL WITH HARUKA COS-PLAYING AS AN EVIL VERSION OF ME, AND ACTUALLY THINKING YOU ALL WERE SERIOUS, NOW IT'S JUST A PRANK! BULLSHIT! EVERYBODY DIES!
Naru: …oh god, they're both royally pissed…
Keitaro: Stop! You don't have to do this! Naru and I had no clue about this until now!
Smart Naru: Why should we believe you! You could be acting right now, just like the others did this entire time!
Motoko: ..I didn't think they would take it like this, Su.
Sexy Naru: Well, you did lie to them. Although I understand why.
Crybaby Naru: uwaaaaa! Why did you all lie! I trusted you!
Dynamic Naru: Calm down. It's not like we never existed. In retrospect, we actually got to understand each other a lot better, as well as strengthening our bonds of friendship. This was never a prank! (cheery smile)
Kanako: …you have no idea how corny you just sounded right now.
Angry Naru: I don't care! I don't want to hear it!
Angry Naru hunches over, covering her ears with her palms, and begins crying.
Angry Naru: Dammit. …I swore to myself I'd never cry…and look at me…I'm an idiot…snff …all this time I trusted you guys…
Keitaro: (walks over to Angry Naru) Angry Naru…listen. I'm sorry. I realize right now you all must be questioning your existence since you feel like you only came to be through an experiment. But, that's not true. You guys have always existed. Remember what Su said? The six of you make up what Naru really is. From what Su said, this test was never about seeing what your individual selves are like, but whether you all love me. I realize that is kind of a selfish way to put it, but…you six had always existed. You guys still exist as Naru herself. Regardless of what temperament you represent, I still love you all as Naru.
Angry Naru looks up at Keitaro, and for the first time smiles.
Angry Naru: snf God you're an idiot. But I guess it's that simplicity that got me to fall in love with you. I'm sorry for being so violent. I guess my real self has realized that already, and you had this discussion with her.
Naru walks up next to Keitaro, and embraces Angry Naru.
Naru: I had no clue how to accurately describe what I felt. But you did it. I thank you.
Angry Naru began to glow softly, and the other five soon glowed as well.
Smart Naru: …it's quite strange how these sort of things can end up. I'm still irritated with you all, but I guess if Angry Naru, Naru's rage incarnate, can forgive you all, then I can too.
They began disappearing one by one, with Sexy Naru staying behind to say something to Naru and Keitaro.
Sexy Naru: When you two get in the mood tonight, Naru, I'd recommend wearing that negligee you've been holding on to for awhile.
Naru and Keitaro got beet red as a response.
Sexy Naru: See you all next time! (gives the peace sign before disappearing)
Everyone was still standing around when Shinobu woke up.
Shinobu: uhhhghhh…my head is killing me…
Motoko: Ano… Shinobu, are you alright?
Shinobu: Except for this massive headache, I think I'm okay. (she surveys herself) Wait. What's this red stuff on my shirt?
Motoko: …I think that's lipstick.
Shinobu's brain took about three seconds to register that information before she realized she last remembered dragging Easygoing Naru into a bar to splash water on her face.
Shinobu: …oh god…I didn't do what I thought I did, did I?
Su: You and Easygoing Naru were groping each other!
Keitaro immediately got a nosebleed and ran the other direction.
Keitaro: I'M SORRY NARU! IT'S JUST A REACTION!
Shinobu: Kyaaaahhh! Oh god, I didn't! Nooo! No one will want to marry me now!
Su: I've got it recorded in case you do get married! (sly cat grin)
Shinobu: GIVE ME THAT! MY SHAME MUST NEVER BE MADE PUBLIC!
Su runs ahead of Shinobu, just out of her reach.
Su: Nyahaha! Even if you get this one, I've got dozens of other copies!
That night at a miraculously restored Hinata House…
Keitaro: Well… even though what happened was messed up, at least I finally know how serious Naru is about our relationship. It'll be great when we get married.
Keitaro begins to have fantasies of marrying Naru on the steps of Tokyo-U, and then imagines her in her wedding veil and her undergarments.
Keitaro: Nononononono! It's still too soon to be thinking of that!
Naru: Thinking of what, Keitaro?
Keitaro turns around, about to apologize profusely to Naru, but then goes slack-jawed at what she's wearing. Naru comes down on him wearing see-through white silk underwear…and I'll leave the rest up to your imaginations. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!
I realize it's been a while since I've last updated. Once again, the chapter starts out not to my liking, but then it finishes up to my satisfaction (yes, even before the scene with Naru and Keitaro in bed. Lol). Probably the main reason behind me updating right now, though, is the fact that at this moment, it's 12:30 am on September 11, 2006. Yes. It's been five years since that tragedy, and regardless of your political, religious, or cultural views, I feel it is important to remember that day. As you all remember, over three thousand people, innocent, unknowing, and unrelated to whatever conflicts this world was preparing for them, met an abrupt end. The fact of the matter is, I don't really give a damn what nationality or what country anyone is from. However, when anyone openly wishes for the death of entire religions and nations, and say that they will do everything in their power to kill you; well… race, religion, ethnic background, and any insignificant difference you can come up with doesn't matter anymore. Homicidal is homicidal, evil is evil. There are firefighters, policemen, and construction workers that aided in the recovery and rescue at the World Trade Center that are actually dying right now from the amount of debris they inhaled while trying to save as many people as possible. I am not trying to put up a political message, and I am in no way trying to stir up controversy. I simply ask that you take a moment of silence for those who are gone, those who continue to suffer from that day, and for their families. That day is still burned vividly into my memory, and it is the kind of event you could never forget. I know very well I won't be able to. If you are offended in any way by my above statements, then you are in great denial of what reality we are in. Any flames made about said comments will be deleted as well. All that I really ask is that we remember the tragedy that befell the U.S., and the sense of camaraderie and fellowship that came to be for a month after that event. Feel free to report me to the moderators if you want, since I have said nothing offensive at all. And if they should suspend my account, I'll go elsewhere. For my readers, I thank you generously, and I know I would be going nowhere without your support. I will continue to improve, both as a writer and as a human being. I hope for your continued support, so until next time, happy reading/writing!