DISCLAIMER: Fullmetal Alchemist does not belong to me.



Everybody winced at the sheer volume of Ed's voice from the other side of the obviously not very sound-proof walls. On the other side of the door, Roy just calmly looked at the seventeen year old alchemist. "You have to become a girl. For a mission." He stated, as if it was an everyday occurence for someone to crossdress for a mission. "Have you gone deaf, Hagane?"

Ed seethed. Of all the people, it just had to be him didn't it. Ed was generally fine with other missions and their requirements, but this, this was going too far. Crossdress? He didn't act like a girl, sound like one or even look like one. "No. Never. Why can't you ask someone else, like... Hawkeye-san for example! Yes, Hawkeye-san! Why don't you ask her? She'll be perfect."

"No can do. She's on paid leave. She hadn't had one in ages."

"Well you can go ask someone else, because I'm not doing it." Ed was stubborn.

"You're the only one who can do it. Your hair looks girly enough." Well, Roy was stubborn too.

"No. Means. No." Ed banged the table with his fists so hard that some of the paperwork flew up before landing back on the desk. Roy remained unfazed. And persistent.

"Hagane, this isn't a request. This is an order. So whether you want to or not, you have to do it. Report here tomorrow dressed like a girl. You're dismissed." He smirked. Ed felt like punching the smirk off the Colonel's face but resisted. An order. Stupid Colonel. One day, he'll punch the colonel so hard his ancestors can feel it.

Without saying another word, Ed stomped out of the office and slammed the door behind him. Nobody approached him to find out what happened. Nobody dared to. Ed was scarier than all the seven Homunculus put together. His face was hidden by shadows, ticks could be seen all over his face, his fists were clenched tightly and his aura screamed "approach me and die". Everybody stepped out of his way as he made his way back to his hotel. He was that scary.

After slamming his hotel room door behind him, he started punching the wall, pretending that it was Mustang's face, all the while mumbling angrily to himself.

"Stupid Colonel. Idiot. Bastard." His human hand was starting to bleed when Al got back. "Onii-san!" He cried and hurried to stop Ed from injuring himself further. Al did his best to calm his brother down and as usual, he succeeded. Leading his brother to the chair, he asked, "onii-san, what happened? I thought that Taisa wanted you to see him today?"

At the mention of the son of the devil (in Ed's opinion at least), his temper flared again. "I just saw him, and do you know what he wanted? He wanted me to crossdress! It doesn't matter that it's for a mission, but he wants me to crossdress! That bastard!" Ed bared his teeth and Al would have escaped to the furtest corner if he wasn't used to his brother's temper.

"Well," Al started, "at least it's for a mission and not for his enjoyment," Al reasoned. Ed calmed down somewhat and muttered, "it's just as bad." Nevertheless, he stood up and headed for the door. "I'm going to the store for a while," and walked out.

Al stared at the door and giggled. Let's hope that his brother survives this mission, whatever it is.


A/N: Future chapters will be longer than this.