Lord Cynic: "Yeah, crappy pun, I know. Cut me some slack. Anyways, I think I'm on a Mudshipper rampage right now, which means you poor people are gonna be seeing a lot of this crap in the next few weeks. And in comparison to other people's work ("Triad Onion", "Princess Viv", "Midnight C", to name a bare few), it still does seem amateurish to me. But hey, practice makes perfect… right? Right? WHY DON'T YOU ANSWER ME?

Anyways, enough of that. TheOneAndOnlyT recommended that I take more care with my dialogue (see his review for "Night watch" if you're confused), so I tried to do better this time around. Oh, and dude, whenever you do get to writing Golden Sun, I'll be skulking around somewhere to read it post-haste. But back to the story. It will get confusing at times… and it's a little random now that I think about it… but this story does remind me of one thing: I can't do short fluff if my life depended on it. And that's so depressing I think I'm gonna cry… nah, stuff it. Let's just get this thing going. Just don't hurt me after reading it… too brutally."

Lord Cynic: "I don't own Golden Sun. If I did, more people would have blue hair!" (People stare at him) "What? I think natural blue hair rocks!"

Inn-describable love

"Mia, I need to tell you something. I can't keep it a secret any longer… I love you. No, that won't do… Mia, I love you and I don't care if you feel the same way, I always will. That's even worse… Mia, ever since… no, that won't work either…"

Poor Isaac. For all the courage and confidence he possessed in battle, he couldn't say four simple, yet potentially devastating words to the girl of his dreams. He could face the toughest monster that ever existed in Weyard, but when it came to confessing his feelings, he was as timid as a vermin. Especially when it came to the gentle healer from Imil…

He closed his eyes and concentrated on the perfect approach. He'd even tried to comb his hair for once, albeit in vain. Garet and Ivan had snickered while he'd attempted futilely to tame the wild mat of blonde hair sitting smugly atop his head, making his efforts all the more useless. Eventually, he'd given up on the worthless task, hoping that Mia wouldn't care. Then again, she always saw him with the exact same unruly hairstyle, so why he fretted about it, nobody knew or could comprehend.

Nonetheless, there he was, outside Mia's room, trying desperately to rehearse a love confession that didn't sound corny coming from him. After all, Mia was a girl of grace and beauty, and he needed just the right words to compliment her. The problem was, due to the lack of prolonged contact around girls (somehow, Jenna didn't count), he was inexperienced with talking intimately with members of the opposite gender. He was already shy and withdrawn in nature, so that made the task oh so much more difficult for the blonde teenager.

Suddenly, a loud smashing sound startled Isaac from his thoughts, followed by the familiar ear-piercing scream of a certain auburn-haired girl. He didn't even realise his clenched hand was inches from knocking on Mia's door, and with a yelp yanked it back hurriedly. His face flushing from anxiety, he directed his attention to the source of the noise.

His eyes travelled down the stairs leading to the barroom, and he sweatdropped when he spotted a panicking Garet running as fast as possible from an irate Jenna. The latter was clutching her Phaeton's Blade grasped venomously in one of her hands as she pursued her prey, who had undoubtedly done something stupid – again. However, Isaac could tell she didn't intend to kill him this time, just maim him severely. How, you might ask? Well, she hadn't gone out of her way to nab Ivan's Kikuichimonji to deliver double the torment, otherwise Garet would've been begging for mercy much louder and more frantically than he was. Nope, she just wanted to make him suffer, for whatever it was he'd done.

Once Garet's strangely high-pitched screaming had faded, Isaac scanned around the rest of the environment from his position at the top of the stairs. The owner of the Kikuichimonji, and his unofficial twin, Sheba, were at the bar counter. They appeared to be conversing with the bartender, and Isaac had to wonder what it was they were discussing. However, when the pair of Jupiter Adepts was given glasses of ale, the sweatdrop on the rear of Isaac's head grew a few sizes. To avoid getting confused in the traumas of mid-teen drinking, he directed his attention to Felix, Jenna's brother and the other Venus Adept in the party. The usually stoic but stern older male was polishing his Sol Blade (Isaac had insisted he keep it after some well-placed blackmail – Venus knows where or how he obtained it), ostensibly concentrating on every detail of the sword. However, Isaac could detect the bulging vein in his temple, signalling that Felix was trying very hard to not corner Garet next time they were alone and threaten to slit his throat for what he'd done to upset Jenna. The twenty-year old male was very protective of his younger sister, and for some reason he didn't like Garet to begin with. Isaac didn't feel like getting into the details of that intense dislike, so he diverted his gaze to the last visible member of the group. That person was the mysterious Lemurian Mercury adept, Piers. No one knew his true age (although he appeared the same age as Felix, apparently Lemurian years were different to the rest of the world), and he wasn't intending to reveal the truth anytime soon. However, he was very wise, and knew a great many tales about the sears of Weyard. Such tales were being narrated to a group of strangers at his table, all whom seemed strangely entranced by his 'captivating chronicles', as he liked to call them. Isaac sometimes doubted whether anything Piers said was true or simply ancient folktale, but at present, he had nothing but the serene, blue-haired man's advice to go on.

Earlier that night, Isaac had resolved to confess his feelings to Mia. However, before he could proceed with his mission, he needed to obtain some guidance from some hopefully more experienced members of the group. He didn't dare ask Ivan and Sheba, because he was certain that they'd give him an extreme headache before they even got to the point. Garet and Jenna were also definitely not on the list of most helpful advisors. They couldn't even admit they had the hots for each other, which Isaac knew they did but also that they'd never say it out loud if their lives depended on it. That left Piers and Felix, but Isaac was still very apprehensive. After all, one was likely to splurge out some sentimental, soppy idea like sitting outside Mia's window at night like a bird of prey (Isaac was sure he'd fall out of the tree as soon as Mia spotted him), while the other was more silent than he was. However, Piers' advice was very down-to-earth and plausible (if not bleeding obvious).

"Just tell her how you feel face-to-face," he had said. "Girls don't like it when boys beat around the bush. They prefer the direct approach. Oh, and flowers wouldn't lose you points, either. I'm sure Mia would be thrilled."

Felix had grunted beside the Mercury adept following the latter's suggestion, which roughly translated to "He's right." At least, Isaac hoped it had. Nonetheless, at least he had something to go on. The only difficulty would then be the exact method of spilling his heart…

The memory jolted Isaac back to his present situation, and he gulped nervously as he turned back to face Mia's door. Well, it was now or never. He was unlikely to have another perfect opportunity quite like this, mainly because it was doubtful that they could ever afford separate rooms ever again. Therefore, his mission was crucial, and the objective was clear, albeit terrifying. Yes, he would do it. He would confess to Mia and tell her how he felt!

Why, then, was his hand trembling? He had raised it to knock on her door, and was astounded and petrified to find it quaking – and he was not using his Venus Psynergy. Was he really a wuss? No, he wasn't. It was just… this was Mia, here. This was a girl of utter radiance with a heart and soul that would melt Prox and Imil simultaneously, with plenty left spare to melt his heart as well. No wonder he felt so nervous. But he would suck it up and do what he had to. He wasn't the leader of the group for nothing.

Steeling his nerves, he gently rapped on Mia's wooden door. As he waited, he released a gasp of oxygen that he realised he'd been holding for several minutes. And Mia wasn't even in front of him to take the rest of his breath away. This would be tougher than any boss battle he'd ever encountered. And the silence was killing him. It had been at least three seconds since he'd knocked. Was she already asleep? No! She couldn't be! Not when this chance was dangling right in front of his face! Man, his luck really sucked! Now he was scre –

"Coming!" a muffled feminine voice called from behind the door.

Isaac's heart skipped a beat, not only from the shock of hearing her unexpected reply, but because her voice was soft and velvety, just like (he imagined) her long, silky cerulean hair. Amidst the heavy beating of his heart against his chest, he heard soft footsteps approaching the door from the other side. Summoning all his courage, he forcefully slowed the beating of his heart, although the sweat pouring from his forehead had a mind of its own. Gah, it was soaking his clothes! Oh no, and the doorknob was turning! What should he do? What should he –

"Hello?" The door opened, and Mia was revealed in…


Isaac could've sworn he heard his jaw hit the floor when he witnessed the female Mercury adept in all her glory. It looked as if she had just had a bath, because a simple but stunning pale blue dress was draped over her graceful body. For such a simple piece of clothing, it accentuated her curves to perfection. And her hair… did his nose (as opposed to his ears, but that was just a figment of his imagination) deceive him, or was it lightly scented? All in all, she looked spectacular.

"My God she's hot," he muttered before he could stop himself. Slowly reality began to set in again, and when he realised what he just said, his stomach plummeted six feet under. "Er, that is, I mean… oh crap…"

"T-That's okay," Mia stammered nervously, fidgeting with the hem of her nightgown. Isaac stared at her incredulously. Why the hell was she nervous? He'd just said the crudest thing in the world and… oh crap, did he even apologise?

"I-I'm sorry," he uttered pitifully, looking at the floor. "I didn't mean to say that."

Yes you did, a voice in his head suddenly remarked. He frowned at it.

"Isaac? Is… Is there something wrong?" Mia suddenly asked. Isaac started, and realised that she was looking at him with her head tilted in confusion.

"That dress doesn't make your butt look big!" he blurted out suddenly. Mia positively gawked at him, and his eyes widened. "I-I-I…"

"Thank… thank you," Mia replied, rescuing Isaac from making a bigger ass of himself. "Um, did you need to see me about something?"

"O-Oh, right!" Isaac said. "I… er… that is…" Oh great, now I'm stuck, he thought irritated. "What I wanted to say is… well…"

"Yes?" Mia pressed, tilting her head again.

Oh God, Isaac thought, she looks so adorable when she does that… well, here goes…

"I lo -" he began, but Garet suddenly bumped into him in his haste to escape from the rampaging Jenna. As a result, the blonde teenager fell right into Mia, and they landed rather painfully on the floor. When he recovered, the first thing he was conscious of was that he had a face full… of Mia's chest. Please don't let her wake up. Please don't let her wake up, he thought desperately as he struggled to rise from his compromising position.

Thankfully, he managed to extract himself from Mia's upper body and rearrange himself in a sitting position by the time her eyes opened. He stared intensely at the floor, trying in vain to ignore the dark scarlet mask he wore on his face. Only when she spoke did he raise his head.

"Oh… oh dear," she mumbled. "That was… quite embarrassing."

Isaac nodded numbly and flashed a weak smile, racking his brain for an escape route out of this awkward situation. Suddenly, Piers' words returned to him.

"Oh, and flowers wouldn't lose you points, either. I'm sure Mia would be thrilled…."

When Mia wasn't looking, he whispered to Flower, the Venus Djinn he borrowed from Felix. The petite, earth-brown creature blinked up at him, and then nodded and bounced onto his hand. It glowed briefly, and then produced a wreath of rose petals. Isaac silently thanked the little Djinni, and it vanished into thin air. He turned back to Mia, who was diverting her eyes to the floor, and carefully draped the wreath over her head. He watched her eyes widen with surprise as she touched it tenderly.

"I-Isaac? Is this for me?" she asked, eyes shining with hope.

"Er, yeah," Isaac replied, rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. "Do… Do you like it?"

He watched as Mia touched the wreath again, contemplating her answer. Suddenly, in a flash she had pecked him on the cheek, leaving him stunned and his face burning red. He stared at her dumbly, and she smiled at him, her face an identical huge of crimson. For a while, they stared at each other, unconsciously lost in the one another's thoughts.

Suddenly, a familiar voice boomed from the foot of the stairs, snapping them back to the cruelty of reality.

"C'mon, you lovebirds! Give your audience a real kiss!"

His face drained of its previous red, and of its original colour altogether, Isaac turned around to the source of the voice. Garet was giving him the thumbs up, while his free arm was wrapped around a cheekily grinning Jenna. At the counter, Ivan and Sheba had devious grins on their faces as they clutched their half-full glasses of ale; and from his table, Piers had his characteristic smile on his face. Only Felix wasn't gazing his way – he was busily polishing his sword, while glaring at Garet out of the corner of his eye.

When he managed to pull his eyes away from his 'audience', Isaac gaped at Mia, who was facing the floor again. The colour was flushed out of his face again, but returned almost as quickly when Mia kissed him on the cheek, gave him a discreet smile and, before he knew it, dragged him the rest of the way into her room and slammed the door quickly.

Yet, when everyone regathered the next morning, the pair were still virgins. So shush.

The End

Lord Cynic: "That is such a bad ending, I know… but I tried to think of a suitable closing line for five full minutes, to no avail. Gah…"