Title: Uninvited
Author: michmak
Characters: Jayne, River, Inara, Mal, Kaylee, Zoe, Simon
Pairing: River / Jayne,
Disclaimers: If they were mine, I'd never let 'em outta the house.

Summary: Doc runs a hand through his hair, before he sits in the chair across from River's bunk. "What happened?" he asks again.

"Nothin' good," Jayne replies.

A/N: Not betaed yet, so if you see anything awful please let me know. I think my email is futzing up again, which means my computer is going in today to get looked at. It's sending but not receiving, so bugchicklv, if you sent it back – sorry, I ain't got it yet. can't wait for new IMAC to arrive

All prior installments can be found here at at rayne(underscore)shippers at Livejournal(dot)com, or at my brand spanking new Live Journal writwritewrote, where I will be posting all my new stuff and archiving all my older stories as well.

This story follows Lessons.


Jayne was never steppin' foot on a core planet again. He din't care how good the job was, he din't care what the money was like, he weren't doin' it and that was that.

Not that the last job had gone badly. It was what happened after the job that had him turned all inside out. Sighin', he looks at Simon before turnin' his gaze back to the girl nestled in his arms. Her face is streaked with tears and snot and even though she's finally fallen asleep, she ain't restin'. He can tell by the way she twitches and moans that she's dreamin' 'a bad things.

"So, can you tell me what happened?" Doc asks softly.

Jayne shrugs. His hands are strokin' gently up and down her back, sometimes catchin' in her hair as he murmurs soothin' nonsense to her.

"Mal got us off-world yet?"

"Yes," Simon replies. "Are we in danger of being followed?"

"Don' know. Mayhap."

Doc runs a hand through his hair, before he sits in the chair across from River's bunk. "What happened?" he asks again.

"Nothin' good," Jayne replies.

Jayne feels like a turkey trussed up for the slaughter. He ain't never weared a neck-tie 'afore and the gorram thing felt like it was chokin' him. The shirt Inara had given him was a tad too small, snug across his shoulders. He was afraid if he took too deep a breath it would split at the seams. Even the pants wasn't comfortable. They was made of fine black wool, but they itched somethin' fierce. Weren't no pockets in them neither, where for he could hide a small weapon or five.

He din't even recognize hi'self when he looked in the small mirror hangin' in his bunk.

'Might as well get this over with,' he sighs as he heads for the cargo bay. He knows Inara pulled a lot of strings to get this to happen, and he apurciates it but - ta ma de! – he's more nervous than a cat in a room full 'a rockin' chairs.


Inara smiles at him when he steps inta the cargo bay, walkin' over to him and smoothin' out the jacket he's got on. "My, my," she murmurs, "don't you look shiny."

"I feel like a fool," he grits out. "Are ya sure I can do this proper?"

"Just remember, outside in."


Doc is standin' off to the side with Kaylee. "I don't believe I've ever seen you in a suit before. It seems wrong somehow." Kaylee elbows him hard in the stomach. "I mean, you look very nice Jayne."

"Thank you," the Merc grits out. "Where's Crazy?"

"Wants to make an entrance," Kaylee smiles. "Wait 'til you see her! 'Nara found her this dress and…well, wait until ya see it!"

"I know I've asked you this before," Mal inserts, "but who are you and what have you done with my mercenary? You almost look respectable in that monkey-suit, Jayne. Almost."

Jayne fiddles with the tie, "Yeah, well, I don't aim to be in it for long." He stops when he realizes what that musta sounded like and glances at Simon apologetically, "Don't go getting' no wrong ideas. I meant, as soon as I get this over with and get back to this gorram ship, I'm puttin' on my own pants and gettin' a shirt that don't have no buttons or collars."

"I can understand why you want to take River out to dinner," Simon retorts dryly, "seeing as you're so excited about the opportunity. You sound like you're going somewhere to be tortured."

"Knock it off you two," Zoë states calmly. "Jayne, try to be gracious. Simon, don't tease."

Before Jayne can reply, Mal clears his throat loudly and jerks his head towards the stairs comin' down from the catwalk. His girl is glidin' down them all graceful-like. Don't look like her feet even touch the floor, she moves so lightly. She's wearing a dress made 'a some shimmery material that floats around her, and every time she moves it seems the color changes from a deep pink to a darker purple. Her hair is flowing down her back like chocolate silk. She takes his breath away.

When she reaches the bottom of the stairs, she moves towards him and spins slowly, her face glowing. "She's a butterfly again."

"Ya sure are, little Crazy. Ya look mighty nice."

"She's ready to fly."

Jayne holds out his arm to her, the way Inara had taught him and swallows when she puts her hand in the crook 'a his elbow. "Let's get goin' than, bao-bei. We got reservations."


Jayne thinks things are goin' pretty smoothly, all things told. So far, he ain't made any serious mistakes with all them little forks and knives, the food is good and the most beautiful girl in the whole ruttin' establishment is sittin' across the table from him.

They ain't said a lot, just little things here and there, but it don't matter none. Jayne don't have to talk to her to enjoy havin' her near. He thinks she feels the same way.

"Peaceful," she agrees, "no words, just thoughts. She is happy."

Some of the other people, sittin' at various tables around them, look at them oddly every now and then but Jayne don't care. His elbows ain't on the table, he ain't spilled any food on hi'self and he still has a fork left. He conjures he's doin' purt'well.

"What'd ya like for desert?" he asks her. "Inara tol' me they have delicious chocolate mousse cake here. And I ain't talkin' about moose, like'n the animal. That'd just be disgustin'."

Crazy smiles at him, "Chocolate endorphins satisfy almost like sex."

Jayne chokes and blushes slightly, "Hey, girl, none 'a that talk here. There ain't nothin' that satisfies like a good tumble and I ain't even kissed ya yet, so don't start puttin' thoughts in my head."

"She wants thoughts in your head," River replies. "She wants kisses. Jayne-bird is too slow; thinks she needs more time but she doesn't. She's been waiting her whole life and now she's ready."

The big Merc blinks at her, slowly. "Say again?"

"She's tired of dreaming, wants to feel. Wants to taste. Wants to kiss your scars away."

Jayne looks around nervously, loosenin' his suddenly too-tight tie. "Your brother…"

"Is a boob," she interrupts. "This girl is ready to live again. She wants Jayne-bird to teach her how to fly. Her wings were broken, but they feel better now."

"Ah…." Jayne don't know how to reply to that. Her soft voice and serious eyes are puttin' all kindsa pictures in his head – pictures 'a him, kissin' her and strokin' her buttermilk skin. His palms are itchin' to feel the suppleness of her thighs.

Someone is standin' at their table, and he's so far gone it takes him a few seconds to notice that River has frozen in shock. Her eyes are wide and frightened lookin' and her face is suddenly broken. He turns to glare at the man.

"Whaddaya want?"

"River?" the man asks, ignorin' him. "River?"

His girl don't say nothin', just stares at the man looking shattered. Jayne is getting' mad.

"Whaddaya want?" he demands again, loudly. The man looks at him like he's a piece of gou-shi stuck to the bottom 'a his shoe.

"Who are you and what are you doing with my daughter? Where is Simon?"

Jayne is on his feet in an instant, his anger suddenly uncontrollable. "You're River's Pa?"

He has moved to River's side, his big hands comin' down and grippin' her shoulders gently, even though he feels like snappin' somethin' in half.

"Crazy-girl, you gonna be okay?" he whispers.

Mr. Tam steps closer. "Where is my son? River -" his voice snaps, "where is your brother?"

"Simon ain't here," Jayne replies for her. He's tuggin' at her now, helpin' her to her feet. She turns inta him when she's standin' and he can feel the way she's shakin' right to his bones. "C'mon, darlin', let's get goin'."

"You aren't going anywhere with my daughter until I get some answers," Tam says aggressively. "Do you know who I am? I can have you arrested for kidnapping."

"Like to see you try," Jayne growls dangerously. "And I know who you are – you're the gou cao de hun dan that let those Alliance bastards torture my girl here for kicks. You're the filthy niao shi de du-gui that let 'em cut into her brain and hurt her while you went to dinner parties and tried to pretend ya didn't have a daughter. You're the qiang-bao hou-zi de qing-wa tian-sha de e-mo who disowned his son when he tried to rescue his sister. You threw them both away like they was garbage. I know who ya are all right!"

The older man grits out, "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't I?" Jayne grits back. "I still hear her screams echoin' in my head, from all those times she was so crazy with fear ain't none 'a us could sleep. I still remember what it's like to hold her still so your son can give her somethin' to calm her down 'afore she hurts herself. I don't understand how anyone can abandon their children the way y'abandoned yours. She ain't your girl anymore."

"River…" Tam reaches out to touch her, but Jayne grabs his wrist tightly in his hand and squeezes it. The feel of the bones grinding together and snapping don't give him near enough satisfaction. He wants to kill this arrogant, spineless hun dan.

"Don't touch her," River turns to face her father. "She's not yours anymore." Buryin' her face back inta his chest, she wraps her arms around him tighter. "Take her home, Jayne-bird. Please take her home."

Jayne drops the elder Tam's wrist, throws his money on the table and carefully lifts his broken butterfly inta his arms. She's shakin' so hard he don't think she can walk and he wants to keep her close to him.

"River Tam!" the older man hollers at them, finally losing his air of hostile civility as he cradles his broken wrist against his chest, "You come back here right now and tell me where your brother is!"

"Not River Tam," Crazy whispers against his chest, so softly he don't think anyone can hear her but hi'self, "River Cobb."


She don't really start cryin' until they're back on Serenity and then she starts sobbin' so hard Jayne's afeared her brain is gonna rattle right outta her head. When she sees Simon, she starts cryin' even harder than 'afore.

"S-s-s-s-simon..." she wails, "J-j-j-j-j-jayne…"

"Get us outta here," he bellows when Mal comes to see what's goin' on. "Get us the hell offa this shithole Core planet before I go back and kill him!"

Doc wants him to take her to the med bay but Jayne heads for her bunk instead, sinkin' down inta it and holdin' her on his lap like he ain't ever gonna let her go.

Simon trails behind him in confusion. "What happened?" he keeps askin', "why is River so upset?"

Jayne just ignores him and strokes her back and hair. "Shh, bao-bei, shh, little darlin'. It's alright, I gotcha. I gotcha, little Crazy-girl." She don't start relaxin' though, until she hears the hum of the engine startin'.

"Don't let him take her back," she moans, "she isn't his anymore."

"I know, darlin'. It's okay, I know. I won't let him near ya. Ya belong to me."

When she finally falls asleep, he looks at the Doc wearily. The younger man is standin' there, just wringin' his hands. Jayne sighs and adjusts his girl so that she's nestled further inta him. He ain't plannin' on lettin' her go anytime soon. He can tell by the way she twitches and moans that she's dreamin' 'a bad things.

"So, can you tell me what happened?" Simon asks softly.

Jayne shrugs. His hands are still strokin' gently up and down her back, sometimes catchin' in her hair as he murmurs soothin' nonsense to her.

"Mal got us off-world yet?"

"Yes," Simon replies. "Are we in danger of being followed?"

"Don' know. Mayhap."

Doc runs a hand through his hair, before he sits in the chair across from River's bunk. "What happened?" he asks again.

"Nothin' good," Jayne replies.

Ta ma de! – fuck me blind

Bao-bei – darling

gou-shi – crap

gou cao de hun dan – dog-humping bastard

niao shi de du-gui – pissed soaked piker

qiang-bao hou-zi de qing-wa tian-sha de e-mo – monkey raping, frog humping Goddamn monster

hun dan – bastard