Disclaimer: Lemony Snicket rocks, but unfortunately, I don't own anything of his. I hope this is a Very Funny Dialogue!
I Have Good News!
K,S,V,I,D, and Q are sitting at the Police Chief's desk.
Klaus: We've been on the run from Count Olaf for quite some time.
Violet: My brother's right. That horrible man has followed us everywhere! He's really dangerous!
Police Chief: I know.
(subtitle says: Duh, he's tried to kill us!)
Isadora: He kidnapped my brother and me when we were still at school.
Police Chief: (looking in a confused way at Duncan and Quigley) Uh, which brother was it again?
Quigley: (speaking simultaneously with Duncan) Not me.
Police Chief: So it was you? (points to Quigley)
Duncan and Quigley in unison: No.
Police Chief: It was neither of you?
Duncan: No, actually—
Isadora: (interrupting Duncan in an annoyed tone) Never mind that! We just came here to ask you if you've caught him yet.
Police Chief: Who?
Sunny: Count Olaf!
Violet: Have you?
Klaus: PLEASE say you have! Please, please, please…
(all orphans begin to plead with Klaus)
Police Chief: (holding up his hand and smiling) Okay, okay, calm down. I have good news!
All orphans in unison: So you've caught him!
Police Chief: No. I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico!