Muggle Shopping

Rating: M for a little sex scene (nothing descriptive). Um, it's my first one so I'm kinda nervous.

Pairing: Harry/Draco

A/N: I can't think of anything to say (which is weird) except review please! I'll hand out Hershey bars!

Disclaimer: If I owned them the books would be so smutty. : )

"We're going muggle shopping," Draco stated as he grabbed his black designer coat from the closet hanger.

"What?" Harry asked scandalized.

Draco looked at him as if his boyfriend had grown an extra head. "Muggle shopping, you twit."

"That's barbaric!"

"I know. It's not like me but Blaise and Pansy were going on about how good it is so I decided to try." He grabbed Harry's coat and tossed it at him. "Here."

"But-but" Harry spluttered.

"What's wrong with you? You're acting like muggle shopping is a crime or something."

"You mean it's not?" he asked incredustlesly.

"Uh, no. Why would it be?"

"You're sick!"

Draco, by now, was very irritated. There was no reason for Harry to make such a big deal out of muggle shopping. "What the hell are you going on about?"

"Muggle shopping?" Harry asked.

Draco shook his head. If Harry couldn't even comprehend that sentence then how would he even get out of the door?

"Are they, like, at a shop you go into to buy them?"

"Duh," Draco said even though it was very undignified. He was too irritated to care.

Harry looked at him in disgust. "Well, I'm not going. And neither are you!"

"And who are you to tell me what I can or can't do?" He walked up and poked the taller boy in the chest.

"Harry. And that's not the point! The point is that it's disgusting!" He in turn poked Draco in the chest.

He swatted his finger away and glared at him is dismay. "Disgusting? You do it all the time!"

"What? I-I do not!"

"Yeah. Yeah, you do."

Harry dropped his coat on the floor in a huff. "I don't have any slaves and I never even heard of muggle shopping. I mean in the past people did that with black people but that was how long ago. Geeze! How far behind in time are wizards? Or is this some twisted pure blood thing?" He narrowed his eyes at the blond, accusingly.

"Pure blood thing?" Draco roared. "What's that supposed to mean? Are you mocking my heritage again? I told you-"

"Well, it's sick!"

"What are you talking about?" Draco choose to ignore the blatant bashing of his heritage for the time being. Truth be told, he was utterly confused at Harry's outburst. "Slaves? Who said anything about slaves?"

"It's like the whole house elf thing isn't it. It's the same as that only sicker. They're people too, you know. You shouldn't treat them like that just because they're not magical!" He rarely ever felt such sympathy for Hermione's association, S.P.E.W., than right now.

"What the bloody hell are you going on about?" He was, if even possible, more confused.

"Muggle shopping! You said you're shopping for muggle's and you're going to make them your slave! I'm moving out if you're doing that!" He snatched his coat from the floor and stalked over to the large door.

Draco burst out in laughter and Harry stopped short to shoot a smoldering look at him.

"What's so damn funny? That fact that you're torturing muggles or-"

"You're so fucking funny, Potter."

Harry gapped in anger then thrust the door open and stormed out. Draco just stood there bent over laughing. When it became apparent that Harry wasn't returning he went out in search for him, his good mood turning sour.

"Potter you arse, get back here! I'm not tracking you down! I swear I won't!" He cursed as he walked down the street, amid many stares. "Potter!" He ran ahead at the sight of messy black hair and grabbed his arm to pull him around.

"What!" Harry yelled, clearly hurt by Draco's laughter.

Despite his anger Draco felt himself softening. "Look Harry. I wasn't talking about buying muggle's and using them as slaves," he chuckled a bit. "Where you come up with these things, I don't know."

Harry scrunched his face up in anger.

"Look, I meant go clothes shopping at muggle stores. You know for muggle clothes." He looked at Harry, thinking of ways where Harry could take that the wrong way to mean something totally different.

"Well, you should have said so," he said after a short pause.

"I did!" Draco wailed.

"No you didn't."

"Grrr!" He grabbed Harry's arm harshly and pulled him along.

"Stop it!" He pounded on Draco's arm but the boy didn't relinquish his grip.

"Look. We're going shopping. For muggle clothes." He pulled the pouting boy along till he stopping struggling and walked along side him.

"I'm cold." Harry stated.

"Where's your coat?"

Harry looked at the sidewalk. "I dropped it."

Draco looked sympathetically and reached up to his coat. He smoothed the collar down and said, "Too bad. That's your own fault."

"Err! Just pick a bloody store!"

"Fine, fine. Don't rush me." Draco smirked and picked a store with a name he couldn't pronounce. Since he couldn't pronounce it he figured it was expensive.

"Walmart? Draco, I thought you had more taste," Harry scoffed and rushed ahead to the doors. He ran inside and smiled at the warmth.

"Walmart? I could have pronounced that." Draco muttered. Now that it was spoken aloud it didn't sound so expensive. He pulled the cold metal handle and walked over to Harry. The store was a galore of color with a person dressed up as Santa on a red chair. Draco frowned. Near Christmas was not a good time to go clothes shopping.

"Let's go look at coats!" Harry grasped his hand and pulled him along the familiar store. Unbeknownst to Draco, Harry often came here to purchase clothes and gifts. Gifts that Draco thought were expensively bought.

"Hey, that looks exactly like the watch you got me for our two year anniversary!" Draco said suspiciously.

Harry tugged him along faster. "Err, really? Those copycats! And would you look at that, it's way cheaper here!"

"It's the same box, Harry."

"Ahh, coats!" He grabbed the biggest and puffiest of all and put it on. Draco looked scandalized.

"No way. That's so….erg." He dug around till he found one more suitable and handed it to Harry.

"This one isn't as warm," he pouted.

"I don't care. It matches your eyes and you don't look like a snowman in it." He pulled Harry over to the clothes section and started piling stuff into Harry's arms.

"Great," Harry muttered dryly. "I'm a clothes hanger." The next fifteen minutes were spent with Draco looking around and grabbing stuff for Harry to hold. There were about twenty things weighing Harry down by the time Draco announced himself finished.

"Where do we try this on?"

"Follow," Harry grumbled as he carried the heavy load, Draco walking behind him with nothing. Some people glanced over at them with amused looks.

"Oh, mommy! I want a butler, too! Can I, mommy?" a little girl called while looking at Harry and Draco.

He shot a glare at Draco, who didn't notice.

They arrived at a small changing room and walked over.

"How may I help you?" a young teen asked in a bored voice as he picked at his fingernails without looking up.

"One changing room." Draco looked in disgust away from the kid.

"Kay. How much stuff you got?" He shuffled over to the numbered door hangers on the wall.

Draco looked pointedly at Harry who sighed and counted everything, managing to drop many in the process. Draco groaned in displeasure.

"Erm, twenty?" Harry said.

The kid stared then counted out three door hangers with the number six on and a number two hanger. He walked over to one of the bigger ones and unlocked it, putting the hangers on the handle. "There." He stepped back to allow Harry in the room.

Harry walked in with Draco trailing behind him. He tossed the clothes on the bench and darted out in relief.

"Harry!" Draco called before the pimply teen could shut the door. "Where are you going? I've got clothes here for you too."

Harry groaned but walked in. The door hesitated then shut. They clearly heard the boy mutter, "Fags" under his breath.

"At least I don't have acne all over my face," Draco called through the door. Harry flopped on the clothes. He hated shopping, especially with Draco. Draco was worse than any girl he'd ever shopped with. Ginny was pretty bad but Draco could out shop her any day. "Get up! You're wrinkling the clothes."

"What's it matter. Other people have worn and wrinkled them," Harry muttered but he got up.

Draco's face showed great disgust. "Other people have worn them? That's so gross!"

Harry laughed. "Well yeah. What else would they do?"

"Clean them after each try on."

"Draco, they are muggles. They can't just wave their wand and, wala, clean clothes."


"We done?" Harry got up and started collecting the clothes while Draco wiped his fingers on his pants.

"No. You always wear clothes like that. You can still try it on."

For the next ten minutes Harry found himself wearing many different tops, itchy, tight, loose, fluffy, and pink. Not to mention so many different pants.

"Suck in your butt Harry," Draco commanded as he tried to shove a pair of too small jeans up his boyfriends arse.

"What? Suck in my butt?" He twisted around to stare at Draco.

"Yeah. They won't fit over your large bottom." For an added measure he pulled and Harry winced.

"Maybe cause they are too small, Draco. Ever think off that?"

Draco threw his hands up in agitation. "Fine! We're done. New store."

Harry smiled and tugged at the pants. He tugged and tugged but they wouldn't come off.

"They're stuck," he informed Draco.

"Pull harder."

"I'm trying." Harry grunted.

"Come here." Draco pulled but he couldn't get them off either.

"Mmm." Harry moaned when Draco's hand grasped at his thigh and tugged at the jeans. He was fully turned on by Draco pulling at the jeans.

"Merlin, Potter. Now it will never come off." Draco indicated to Harry's crouch.

"Sorry," he moaned.

"Horny bastard," Draco said fondly.

Five minutes later Harry was able to extract the pants from his skin. He gathered all the clothes and they walked out of the dressing room. The pimply teen was standing there with a look of disgust and there were two other people staring at them. One of the girls staring looked surprised and the other licked her lips wantonly.

"What?" Draco sneered. "Never heard two hot guys get it on in a dressing room?"

The boy gagged. The one girl swooned and the other gaped.

"Draco," Harry hissed. He quickly put the clothes on a spare shopping cart and pulled Draco away with a red face. That was the last time he would ever go there.

"Oh come on, Harry. It was fun," Draco said after listening to ten minutes of Harry complaining about how he would never be able to go there again.

"No. It was embarrassing."

"Look, stop complaining and I'll give you a present later," Draco bargained.

Harry hesitated. "…Will I like it?"

"You will just have to wait and see."

They headed down the street in the biting wind. Soft snowflakes started to fall and Draco sneered at them while Harry smiled. Children ran down the sidewalk trying to catch the snowflakes on their tongue and Harry looked wistfully at them.

Three stores, sixty topes, three irritated sales clerks, five bags, thirty pants, four dressing rooms, and three hours later Harry was dead tired.

"Can we go home now?" he wined.

"No," Draco called over his shoulder to the rapidly disappearing Harry. "Stop slugging behind."

Harry walked even slower. Many people on the sidewalk passed him in concern. In a race with a slug the slug would win, Draco thought.

"I'm too tired. I'm going to die."

"Fine. I'll come back for you." And he walked away.

"Draco!" Harry yelled indignity.

"Fine. Two more stores," the blond compromised.


"Fine. One."

"…OK. But if I fall over you're carrying me. Oh and I'm not going to be your coat hanger. Deal?"

Draco thought it through. "Deal." Draco snorted as Harry ran up and walked in perfect condition. The little faker.

They walked into a large department store called Sears and Draco looked around. "This looks like the kind of store you would shop in," he said scornfully.

"Erm, no it's not. It's dreadfully expensive," Harry lied. It was a good thing that Draco didn't know muggle money; therefore, he didn't know if the clothes were expensive or not.


This time Draco stole a rusty shopping cart from a little old lady that had her back turned. He tossed her clothes and purse to the floor soundlessly and wheeled it over to a disappointed Harry.

"What? You said you didn't want to carry the clothes."

Harry shook his head and went off in search of another shopping cart while the little old lady looked around in confusion for her cart. He came back with an equally rusty cart and went over to the lady.

"Here." He picked up her purse and clothes and put them back in the cart.

"Why thank you, boy. I can't figure out where my cart had gone," she said.

"Oh, erm, I think it rolled away," Harry replied lamely. She nodded her thanks and he walked back over to Draco.

"Bloody hero," he muttered.

They walked over to the men's section and Draco piled stuff into the cart. Harry followed in his wake groggily. When they finally got into a dressing room Draco picked the biggest and Harry plopped on the white bench.

Draco tried on many outfits and modeled them all to Harry, who fell asleep two minutes into the modeling, although he did recall liking the leather pants very much. It wasn't till Draco was done with his pile that he noticed Harry was asleep.

Rolling his eyes he walked out to put the clothes on the rack, leaving the few he wanted on the hanger in the dressing room.

"Attention all customers. Sears will be closing in ten minutes. Please wrap up your shopping and pay as soon as possible. Thank you." The loudspeaker clicked off and Draco shut the door to the changing room, locking it.

"Harry…" he whispered.

"Wa?" Harry gargled sleepily.

"Get up you twit. I can't very well give you your present when you're sleeping." He seemed to think about it a bit. "Well, I could but I'm not into that type of thing."

Harry sat up. Draco had caught his attention.

"What is it?"

"Care for a little dressing room shag?" Draco walked closer and stood in front of Harry, looking down his nose at him.

"That's the present," Harry said disappointedly. "I thought it would be something like a quidditch stadium."

"Shut up and let me fuck you."

"Hmm….fine," he grumbled good naturally.

Draco grabbed the front of Harry's shirt and pulled him up to his level. Crushing his lips upon the other boy's, he unzipped the green-eyed boy's pants. Harry's lips parted with a moan and Draco's tongue darted in to taste familiar territory.

Both boys' pants fell to the floor in a hurry. Draco roughly shoved Harry against the wall and kissed down his neck. He reached his adam's apple and bit lightly. Harry moaned and dug his fingers in Draco's sinfully silky hair.

"We got to hurry," Draco muttered in between searing kisses.

Harry took the incentive and dropped to the floor on all fours. Draco licked his lips and pulled out his wand. "Lubricus."

One slender finger entered and Harry's back arched in pain. Two entered and more fast, getting him ready. Moaning in lust, Harry urged Draco faster.

Replacing his finger with his bursting member Draco pushed in and out fast and hard, Harry withering beneath him, till they both reached their climax. Releasing, Draco left a lingering kiss on Harry's back.

"Mmm. Best dressing room shag I ever had," Harry said while dressing.

"Probably the only."


They got dressed and opened the door to find a women standing there with her hand over her mouth, wide eyes.

"Heh," Harry murmured embarrassed.

"You can lock up now. We're done." Draco ushered the messier than usual haired Harry out of the store with a smile on his lips.

"Well, that's another store I can never go to again." Harry said solemnly.

Draco slipped his hand into Harry's back pocket. "Want me to add more to your list?"