I don't own Neon Genesis or any of its characters. NOTES

This is an AU FIC where Shinji has the normal yet dysfunctional family. No EVA or Angels and I've decided to include almost all the characters from the anime. There is no real point to the FIC. It's just some fun and a creative outlet. Hopefully it'll spark some better ideas for my other stories.

"…" Normal speech

'…' Thoughts

(…) Computer / phone / other chat (you will know what I mean…)


The sound of his alarm clock slowly brought out of his slumber. Annoyed by the infuriating sound he lazily reached out and slapped his hand down. The high pitch sound creased and peace was restored. Happy with the result, Shinji returned to the land of slumber.

"You must get up brother if we are to get to school on time."

"Not now…" he replied half asleep and pulled the sheets over his head.

'Hang on… When did Rei get into my room?' Shinji pulled his sheets back down and looked towards his door. There was no one else in his room.

"I must still be dreaming…" He went to rolled over but found he couldn't move. He thought his sheets were still tucked in from the night before and shrugged it off.

"Why must you always be difficult in the morning?" Her voice sounded a lot closer and clearer then before. He looked around the room but still no one. Suddenly a mop of blue hair appeared out from beneath his sheets.

"Did you know you still mumble in your sleep?" It then dawn on him that Rei was in his room and actually in his bed.


Meanwhile in the kitchen downstairs, the matriarch of the Ikari household was busy preparing a health breakfast for her children. She hummed happy tune as she stirred the miso soup.

"It sounds like my precious little Shinji is awake." His early morning shrill didn't worry her in the slightest. It was followed by the thud of someone hitting the floor above her. "Rei hasn't slept in Shinji's bed since they were little…" She amused herself with memories of her two children holding each other while they slept at a young age.

"What's for breakfast?" the guff voice of her husband broke her from pleasant recollections. He sat down at the breakfast table and opened his morning newspaper.

"Oh, good morning dear. I'm a bit busy making breakfast and lunch for the children so could you look after yourself this morning?"

"What! Are you placing the meals of the children ahead of your own husband? This is unacceptable! Don't you know…"


Before he could finish ranting the back side of the wooden spoon collided with his head sending him face first into the table.

"Are you asking me to choose you over my children? I wouldn't think you would do such a thing sine you are such a loving and adoring husband." Gendo looked up from the bloody pool on the table to see a dangerous and unhuman aura emitting from his wife as she stood over the stove.

"Talk about ungrateful…"

"GENDO NO BAKA!" She went strike again but her soup spoon only cut through the after image of her target and made a sizable dent in the table. She stalked out the front door where her husband sat in the car. He desperately tried to get the engine to turn over and make his escape. Her aura had become stronger and almost evil. With each step she took the plants and grass around her wilted and died instantly.

"God damn it! Start!" he began to sweat as the impending doom loomed closer and closer.

"Good morning Yui!" The voice of her long time friend and neighbour Kyoko Sohryu instantly broke her war path. "My… Your front yard could do with some work." She was quick to point out path of dead and dying plant life leading from the front door to where Yui was currently standing.

"Good morning Kyoko! It's a brilliant day isn't it?" she acknowledged her friend and quickly concealed her wooden spoon behind her back like nothing had happen.

"Where's Asuka this morning?"

"Good morning!" there was just a flash of red followed by a gust of wind as the blur entered the house.

"Asuka! Come back here and greet people properly!" her mother yelled. She was constantly trying to get her little girl to act more like a lady.

"That's fine… She must be eager to see Shinji…" Yui giggled. "Ah… To be young and in love again…" Both mothers walked back into the house chatting and gossiping as usual. Gendo stopped trying to start the car as he watched their retreating form. He slowly got out of the driver's side and slumped to the ground. With the immediate danger gone he decided to rest up a bit.

"I guess God is in heaven and all is right in the world."

He wished he could take back those words as he saw a human tornado wielding the dreaded wooden spoon bearing down on him. Human instinct instantly kicked in and he fled down the street.


"How many times have I said that you can't keep doing this?" Shinji desperately searched a pile of clothes in the corner of his room for his school uniform.

"I don't see any issue with me sleeping with you." She sounded annoyed and upset at the same time. "I heard you mumbling in your sleep and thought you were having a nightmare. I was concerned for you well being and this is the thanks I get."

"It's not that! What do you think would happen if someone came walking in and found us like this." His arm flapped towards the door as if it was a queue for someone to enter and the way his luck went someone did.

"Alright Baka Shinji! Time to get up and…" Asuka stopped when she saw Rei wearing an almost see through nightie and sitting in Shinji's bed. Her eyes then scanned over to a half naked Shinji.

"Oh… crap…"


"That girl… she hasn't leant any manners at all…" Kyoko commented to herself as she slipped away on the miso that Yui was preparing. The almost ear deafening German hybrid Japanese abuse continued to fill the morning air but this was considered normal for this household.

"I must apologies for Asuka's behaviour, Yui." She told her friend re entering the kitchen. "I'm afraid she has made it a habit of spoiling our time breakfast."

"Oh no. Don't worry yourself. They have all been friends since babies. I don't think anything bad would really happen." At the same time, something flew by the kitchen window and landed with thud in the bushes. Both women opened the window to investigate and saw Shinji's best impersonation of a crash test dummy lying awkwardly in one of the side shrubs

"SHINJI!" Yui immediate rushed back outside to her son's side.

"Asuka… Langely… Sohryu…" Each time she announce a portion of her daughter's name it hinted at the trouble the young German was installed for. Kyoko looked up from the window to see the perpetrator. Asuka's anger quickly disappeared when she saw the look in her mother's eyes and disappeared back into the bedroom window.


Gendo was still sucking in the air while sitting next to the bench near the vending machines. He held one cold drink to the back of his head and a number of empty cans litter the ground around him. It was amazing how fear can make the human body doing things that it wasn't thought possible; like run the entire way to the office through the peak hour traffic and still make it in early.

"You got her mad again?" Fuyutsuki asked waiting for the machine to finish pouring his coffee into the paper cup.

Gendo just nodded.

"This is what? The second time this week?"

He showed three fingers telling the older man that he was wrong with his number of guesses.

"Don't you ever learn? How long have you been married to her?"

He changed his hand gesture to just one finger. "All is proceeding as planned. The scenario is still on schedule."

"What scenario? What schedule? Will stop talking like you have some grand plan that is going save the world and mankind! This is NERV Heavy Industries. Not some top secret government organisation. I sometimes wonder how you managed to build this corporation into the multi billion conglomerate that it is."


Shinji felt something cold and wet on his forehead. He opened his eyes to find a wet wash cloth covering his brow.

"Shinji! Are you alright! I was so worried!" Yui wiped the tears away as her son showed signs of life again.

"Hey mom… What happen?"

"You remember me. I'm so happy." She grabbed and pulled him a big bear hug.

"Didn't you think you are over doing a bit?" Kyoko asked.

"What! I thought I would never get to see my baby's smile again. I have every right to act like this." She continued to hold onto him like he was really dying.

"I think your baby needs to breathe." She pointed the now blue face of Shinji struggling for air. Yui quickly released her hold and allowed him to breathe once again.

"Ok!" her concern and fear disappeared and was replaced this full of enthusiasm and energy again. "I have to get your school lunches ready." She returned to the kitchen with Kyoko in tow.

When the world stopped spinning and his oxygen level returned to a normal level that his brain and muscles allowed him to move on his on free will, he walked and sat at the breakfast table. Rei and Asuka were already half way through their meals and Kyoko resumed her miso from before. The silence around the table was unusual and punctuated by the occasional elbow from Rei to Asuka's ribs. This was followed up by a subtle kick under the table from Kyoko.

Asuka slammed her hands on the table. "If you two don't stop bothering me…" she didn't finish her threat when it occurred to her what the both of them were trying to do.

"I'm sorry… For smacking you earlier… There I said it." Asuka quickly sat down after her apology and continued eating.

"Isn't that nice Shinji? I guess the both of you can get married now." Yui's comment caused him to spray his breakfast all over the table.

"Married! Just how on earth do you get marriage from an apology!"

"Oh my there is so much to organise… But I do expect that you do the gentlemanly thing and ask Kyoko for her permission."

"Are you even listening to me!" The far away look in his mother's eyes told that there was nothing he could do at this point. He turned to Asuka for support.

"Asuka help me. Tell them that this is insane." The young girl just looked away to hide the massive blush that was appearing.

"I have no problem with you marrying Asuka but I always thought that you would have a lot better taste in women. You deserve someone who can behave more like lady. I could see you with a more mature woman; someone like myself."

"WHAT!" This time it was Asuka and Rei to spray their breakfast across the table.

"Don't be so surprised Asuka dear. I have special needs like any other normal woman and Shinji is quite a handsome young man. I'm sure he has everything in the right places. He's polite and courteous. There's nothing much more a woman really needs."

"I can't believe I'm hearing this! I think I'm going to be sick." Asuka's blush amazingly changed to a green colour.

"I never knew that my little Shinji was such a lady's man." The mother went to give him another hug but only found an empty chair. "Shinji?"

'Damn it! I had one foot out the front door!' this was actually true. Somehow he managed to sneak away from the table and was half way out the front door.

"I think I hear the school bus. See ya!" And just like he was gone like a flash. He wasn't going this opportunity for escape.

"Hey! Wait up!" Asuka and Rei grabbed their school bags and followed him out the door with the same speed.

"But you didn't take your lunches!" Yui followed them to the door with a bento lunch box in each hand but it was too late.

"It's a shame… I had a lot material that could have used on my dear Asuka." Kyoko reflected as she continued drinking her miso.

Shinji's legs took him as far they could go until they felt like jelly. He rested against a random street light and caught his breathe.

"Here baka." Asuka followed up shortly after by shoving his school bag into his mid section. "You forgot this."

"Thanks." He pulled his bag around his shoulders. "How did you catch up to me so quickly?"

"Do you really have to ask? I did represent the school in the cross country last month. Catching up to a slow poke like you wasn't anything special."

"I remember now. Wasn't that the one where you ran in last?" Shinji remembered how Asuka wouldn't stop ranting and carrying on after being selected to represent the school. It came as a huge shock when she finished last and more than a shock for anyone who happened to mention it anytime after that.

"Ouch! Did you have to hit me so hard?" Shinji rubbed the top of his head where he was cobbered.

"Come on. If we keep loafing around here, we'll be late for school." She grabbed his hand and led him towards school. They walked hand in hand down the street and passed a number of other students. As soon as they spotted them the pointing and whispering started.

"Hey, Asuka… Shouldn't we…" his words alerted her to the other student's actions.

"What's wrong? Are you afraid of what other people think about us?" She stopped in her tracks and turned to face him.

"No! I don't care what people think… Hang on, what do you mean when you say us?"

She just rolled her eyes. "You are still dense but I guess that all part of your charm." She smile but it wasn't a normal smile. It made her more beautiful than she already was. It was something that she saved for him ever since they played as children. And ever time she would use it, Shinji couldn't help but smile back.

"You know I can't argue with you when you do that." He admitted his defeat but inside he didn't seem to care.

"That's right! You'll always be my baka Shinji!" She gave him a sexy winked and took his hand again. They continued down the street ignoring the looks and whispers from the other students.



So what do you think? I know that some may be disappointed with OC and other aspects of the story that don't make sense or seem strange. But this isn't to be taken seriously. Hopefully you had fun reading. Don't forget to add a review or a suggestion. Future chapters will see more favourites like Misato and Kaji. So stay tuned.

Thanks, wonga316