Okay, I wrote this in a day...I knew I had to write it. It's something different, something fun, and something I quite enjoyed! So I hope you enjoy it too...now, onto the other stories! And this story took quite a bit of working out...you know, maths wise! I finally figured that, seeing Chandler was born in 1969 (well, that was never confirmed, but I go by how old Matty Perry is, because that seems right...plus he was meant to be 9 in the Thanksgiving flashback...soo) so Elana was born in around 1926, judging from certain things and...oh you guys don't care! Please read and review and I love you!
I do not own friends/actors/characters but I do own a sore throat...WAH!
There are times in your life when you just stop.
I know that simply because I have experienced it; both through me and so many others that have come and gone.
By stop, I mean many different things because it has many different meanings.
It could mean stop, and smell the roses.
Stop, and look up at the stars, imagining you could get away from the place that you hate.
Stop, and realise everything has gone horribly wrong.
Stop, and suddenly recognise the woman or man in front of you as the love of your life.
Stop, and smile because everything was falling into place.
The last one means to move on, or as the living like to call it, die. I have never liked that word very much; it sounds too depressing and too final, when it is obvious to me that its not.
Stop can mean so many more things than the ones I have mentioned, but I will only mention the ones said because those are the ones that I have personally experienced.
I stopped and smelt the roses the day after my father stopped. He had always done that and I had found it silly until he left this Earth. When I lost him I decided to see what all the fuss was about and it payed off. To smell the roses means so much more then inhaling a nice scent. It means to take a moment and simply bask.
I stopped and looked up at the stars the day my mother stopped, because she had never had an odd quirk like my father had, so I had nothing to try out. I wanted to get away from the place I suddenly hated because I was so alone.
The day I looked up at the stars was the day I stopped to realise that everything had gone horribly wrong.
Soon enough I was forced to stop in the park when a handsome man stepped in front of me. He was the love of my life.
On our wedding day, I stopped and smiled, because everything was falling into place.
Then I just stopped.
It was too soon for me; much too soon. Twenty one I had been, and on my way to tell my husband that we would be having a baby in six months. I had been too elated to realise that I should have been more careful walking on the ice, especially with my less than practical shoes. I slipped, hit my head on the curb and then I stopped. That was eighty two years ago.
My name is Elena and this is my story.
It is a confusing thing to move on, and when it first happened to me, I felt like screaming. I didn't feel pain, only in my heart.
Heaven is what you can make it, whatever you can think of. My heaven was the park where I first met my Daniel, simply because to me, that was heaven. It wasn't until I created it that I realised that park was heaven simply because of one thing: Daniel.
But it was too late to change it, because you only get one choice. So I got the park, my father got the chapel where he was married and my mother joined him. I visit them from time to time, but like most children feel about their parents, there is only so much you can take of them.
So I was stuck alone in my park, with the trees and the benches and everything that was perfection, but not Daniel.
I had never been more upset, until I was given the job that I now hold, the job of guardian angel. Yes, it's true, they do exist. And thankfully, I was Daniel's guardian angel.
It was both heaven and hell taking care of him; watching him first grieve over me and then after a very long time, finally moving on. I was overjoyed that I could watch him, but it devastated me that I couldn't touch him, talk to him, kiss him, feel him. And as much as I wanted him to be happy, I hated seeing him with other women.
My Daniel stopped when he was thirty two, victim of a car accident. I tried to save him, but I couldn't. In a way, I wasn't sure if I really wanted to. He had never fallen in love after me and I knew that he would join me if he moved on.
Which he did, and now my park is the heaven I picked out.
But my love life is not what this story is about.
This is about what happened after. Well, not straight after.
Straight after Daniel joined me and I was happier then ever, I was given another person to look after, little Johnny Wilhelm. I watched him from birth, keeping him from trouble and loving him like he was my own, even if I couldn't reach out to him.
Johnny stopped when he was twelve, and I don't want to tell you how, because it still pains me to think about it. I visit him from time to time and it is wonderful, but that is still not what this story is about.
No, this is about my next charge, another tiny little person that was more precious then Johnny had ever been.
When baby Chandler Bing first opened his blue eyes, I knew I was lost in them.
I tried to fight it, I really did. The pain of watching both Daniel and then Johnny die – two people I cared about so much – still lingered and I didn't want to get that attached to Chandler; didn't want to feel that much pain when he stopped.
But it was impossible not to fall in love with Chandler, and I finally stopped fighting it when he took his first step. I still remember the place he took it, right in the middle of his kitchen, two feet away from the refrigerator. Watching him take that step made my heart swell, and I once again found myself smitten.
His parents had been happy back then, watching Chandler and grinning, Charles taking photographs while Nora laughed and cried in happiness. They had been happy.
By the time Chandler was four, things had changed and he knew it. I could see the look in his eye as he watched his parents bicker; even at four he had known that something was amiss.
At age seven, after falling off his skateboard and skinning his knee, he had rushed to find his dad to help him. I hadn't been able to stop him from hurting his knee because I had caused it. Better he have a sore knee then have been hit by the car that had been racing down the road, which was what would have happened had I not placed a rock in the skateboards way.
Too busy with protecting Chandler from the car, I hadn't had time to check what his father was doing. Chandler found him in the pool house and I knew he would never be the same after that; not after seeing his father and the house boy.
I wanted to cry and yell at Chandler's parents for exposing him to things like that, but I couldn't. So I didn't do anything as his parents became more and more outrageous, exposing Chandler to things that no child should ever have seen.
In a way I was glad when Nora told Chandler over the Thanksgiving table that she and Charles would be getting a divorce, although I took the news much better then Chandler did.
I was glad because, although I knew that little Chandler wouldn't exactly be normal for the rest of his life, I was sure that things would improve once he got away from both his parents in the same room.
I was mostly right.
His situation did improve, no longer seeing tequila shots being done off a man by his father, but he did have to put up with his mother. She was never a normal mother, although I could tell she wanted the best for her son, because she loved him.
But Chandler didn't need a mother who slept with men who had barely turned 20, nor did he need a mother who wrote erotic novels, things that his friends would later pass around as pornography.
Nor did it help him when his father, now in drag, tried desperately to connect with his son, and ended up embarrassing him constantly.
Add that to all the therapy he received, and the smoking and he did not have a good situation.
My heart went out to Chandler, and I was glad when Charles moved to Las Vegas, although I wished Chandler could have had a good male role model in his life, not Nora's desperate attempts at husbands.
Chandler going to boarding school was the best thing for him, although I knew he didn't think so. He wanted girls, and he made his argument quite vocal each time he spoke with Nora. But she never once relented and he was stuck there, getting his girls only when he went home, or to camp.
I still remember his first kiss, and it makes me laugh each time the thought pops into my head. He had been eight years old and little Sally Butler had sat next to him in school. Her blonde hair had trailed down her back in perfect ringlets and her blue eyes had been surrounded by long lashes. To Chandler, she had been the prettiest thing he had ever seen and he had turned red each time she batted those eyelashes at him.
He had liked her for months, but hadn't said anything, both because he was too shy and because he and his friends had been in the 'girls are gross' stage.
But there had been a day when he and Sally had ended up sitting together alone in the playground and Chandler, on a sudden impulse, had leaned over and kissed her. Sally's already huge blue eyes had widened even more and she had leapt to her feet. Chandler had done the same, panic showing clearly on his face. As Sally considered what she should do, Chandler did the same thing.
I could tell by the look on Sally's face that she had decided the kiss was more than alright, but Chandler hadn't picked up on that. So as Sally had leaned in for another kiss, Chandler had pushed her into a puddle of mud and ran off, trying to save his image of hating girls. Sally had been devastated and Chandler had been mortified.
Needless to say, the next time the two had seen one another, Chandler had ended up on the ground with a sore eye, not realising that Sally had been learning karate.
Watching Chandler grow from an adorable child to an adorable teenager was a wonderful thing, because even though he hadn't had the best upbringing, he was still an amazing kid. And I laughed at every one of his jokes, even if others didn't. Chandler was funnier then anyone I had ever encountered, but maybe I thought that because I was a girl of the 40's.
I didn't only laugh at his jokes, I laughed at his style. What was considered 'cool' back then was never what I would have considered to be stylish. The flock of seagull's hair made me laugh so hard the first time he wore it that way that I cried. But the girls had liked it, and Chandler knew it.
Chandler graduating from high school made me cry as I realised that my boy was all grown up. I felt like a mother, and that Chandler was the child that I had only briefly known about. That was impossible, but it was how I felt. So I cried.
While I was dealing with Chandler and his wacky way of living, Daniel had been dealing with another boy, Ross Gellar. Thankfully, Daniel had been fascinated by dinosaurs, otherwise I think he would have had a boring time.
When it came to Chandler going to collage, both Daniel and I were overjoyed when we realised that his roommate was Ross. Now we could watch together and see the two interact.
Ross and Chandler didn't have a very good start, needless to say. Chandler had gotten there first, claimed the better bed and kicked off his shoes, which had landed on the opposite bed. He had left his things unpacked on the floor, lay back on his bed and lit a cigarette. Ross had walked in and I could have sworn I had seen him pale.
Chandler, with his 'cool' haircut and clothes, smoking a cigarette and regarding him with cool blue eyes hadn't been the thing that Ross had expected, obviously. He had glanced down at himself, wearing his geeky clothes and then back up at Chandler, muttering his name. Chandler had breathed out a long stream of smoke, then muttered his name back. It had been like something out of those action movies that Chandler liked so much, and the tension had been high. Ross had looked at Chandler's muddy shoes; still sitting on his bed, then had picked them up and tossed them to the ground. Chandler had risen, still looking at Ross coolly and asked if there was a problem. Ross had shaken his head and Chandler had nodded, leaning back once more.
Thinking about how Chandler had been back then makes me laugh. He was completely different then to how he was five years later and Ross can be credited with that.
Two months after living together, Ross and Chandler had still been tense, with Chandler still tossing his huge loafers wherever, caked in mud, and Ross setting up his air purifier. They obviously had problems but I knew a secret. Chandler had quietly been in awe of Ross, it was clear on his face. He was amazed by how smart Ross was and how dedicated Ross was.
Ross too was obviously in awe with Chandler. He was the guy that Ross had dreamed of being when he grew up, cool, funny and still managing to be smart. But they hadn't let that slip.
I still remember the day they became friends. It was such a simple thing but it was effective. Ross had been walking down the halls, minding his own business when David Griffin had casually stuck his foot out and tripped Ross. Books had gone everywhere and David and his ridiculous posse had stood there laughing like idiots. Ross had quickly started to gather his things but David had stepped on a paper, stopping him from lifting it.
It was then that Chandler had intervened. Never being a physical fighter, Chandler had done the only thing he could think of. He had walked up, given David what the kids called a wedgie and then proceeded to yank his pants down to his ankles. David had let out a shrill cry, his underwear pulled up too tight and exposing quite a bit.
Chandler had turned to him and I still remember his words.
You humiliate my friend and I'll humiliate you…and believe me, I know things a lot worse then this…you don't grow up the way I did and not know. Do we understand each other, Ole Davo?
David had blushed, pulled up his pants and nodded. Chandler had done his trademark smirk, turned and helped Ross to his feet. And that moment had been a moment to make me proud.
That night, Ross had shown Chandler a picture of Rachel and Chandler had commented that she was pretty, but I knew he was thinking about how huge her nose was. I hadn't watched Chandler for over eighteen years for nothing; I knew what he was thinking. Ross had looked at Chandler, his eyes widening and exclaimed that Rachel wasn't just pretty, she was a goddess. Chandler had raised his hands in defence and agreed. Ross had then glared at him and Chandler had learnt that he wasn't allowed to say that about Rachel. Ross was an odd one, but they bonded quickly, so much that Ross invited Chandler to Thanksgiving that year.
It was there that I like to think that history was made, even if it was only to me. It was there that Chandler met both Monica – Ross' baby sister - and Rachel, who would play a very important part in his life, as would Ross.
Monica was a girl that I instantly adored, and although she was chubby, I could tell she would have been stunning if she lost some weight. Daniel hadn't agreed. Needless to say, I had won that bet.
Chandler hadn't payed much attention to Monica that night –instead discreetly checking Rachel out, despite the nose - but it was clear that Monica would have followed him to the end of the Earth, she was that smitten. Later that night came the first time I can ever recall wanting to take Chandler and shake him. Of course, he couldn't have known that Monica was standing behind him when he called her fat, but the fact that he had said it anyway made me mad. But that was Chandler, never thinking about what he was saying. And in a way, that comment was a good thing, as it was the reason why Monica lost all her weight, and not only was her heart out of danger, but she was, in fact stunning.
Chandler obviously agreed, because the next Thanksgiving, he couldn't keep his eyes off of her, even though Rachel and her fixed nose was also there. That night ended interestingly, I'll say that. Monica cutting off Chandler's toe was something I'll never forget and even though Chandler had been upset and obviously in pain, I couldn't help but laugh. Poor Monica, she was so stressed out about it and suddenly realised that she wasn't that mad at Chandler anymore. They were even and Chandler was missing his toe. Daniel found the situation funny too, so I didn't feel that bad.
By then, Chandler was no longer the cool guy in collage; that hadn't lasted all that long, since he had started hanging around Ross. I was proud of the fact that Chandler didn't care, he would rather hang with Ross then be cool, and get the girls.
Daniel told me the day before Chandler and Ross graduated that Ross had started a rumour about his roommate. I had shaken my head and laughed. Poor Chandler. No wonder everyone thought he was gay. It was Ross' doing.
Them graduating from collage had been a wonderful day and I had smiled as Ross had kissed his girlfriend Carol, and Chandler had decided to kiss her too. Carol had been surprised and Ross hadn't been happy, and Chandler had once again learned never to follow his impulses when it came to randomly kissing girls.
I cried the day Ross and Carol got married and I'm sure that Daniel cried too, although he claimed that there was something in his eye. I didn't believe that, but I let it slide.
Chandler also seemed to have something in his eye that day and just like Daniel, he denied it. But he was incredibly happy and proud of his best friend. Monica had looked beautiful that day, although I knew that she was upset that she and Rachel had drifted apart.
Chandler had found both a job and a home by then, although he was adamant that they were both temporary. He had gotten the apartment thanks to Monica, who lived across the hall. I thought it was a nice set up, mainly because I was hoping that the two would finally realise that they were perfect for one another. That didn't happen any time soon, because Monica started dating Chandler's roommate Kip.
It was around that time that both Chandler and I met Phoebe. She instantly became my favourite out of the group, excluding Chandler of course. There was something about her that made me smile. She was amazing, wonderful and so funny, and she instantly kicked Monica off of second place on my favourites list. Daniel agreed.
I remember the night that Kip and Monica broke up. I didn't witness it because I was watching Chandler of course, but when he got home, Monica was sitting on her couch, looking desolate. Chandler had watched her for a second then walked over and hugged her, not even asking what was wrong. My heart had leapt in joy and I had hoped that they would get together then, but I didn't get my wish.
Kip moved out not long after and I knew that Chandler was happy to see him go. Things had been awkward between the two since the break-up and Chandler obviously resented him for hurting Monica.
But there were other things to worry about besides Kip. Ross was depressed because Carol had been distant, Phoebe was depressed because she had fallen in love with a gay ice dancer, Monica was depressed because she was certain she was going to die alone and Chandler was depressed for the same reason. It wasn't a very happy time, that's for sure.
They had all seemed to stop and realise that everything had gone horribly wrong and my heart had gone out to them. I knew that feeling too well.
Then, as if they had been jumpstarted, they all began to move again, although not in the happiest way for some. Phoebe found her grandmother and decided to move out, but had a hard time telling Monica. Ross found out his wife was a lesbian and Daniel rolled his eyes, glad that Ross had finally figured out what he had suspected for a while. And Chandler had gotten a new roommate.
Joey. I love Joey so much and if there was ever a person I could have handpicked to be Chandler's best friend, it would have been Joey. He was so wonderful and adorable and I wanted to hug him, but I couldn't. Instead, I sat back and watched the two as they watched Baywatch, drank beers and had a great time, despite the fact that Chandler hated his job and Joey had no job.
Time passed quickly once Joey was there, although when Rachel came, it was a cause for me to sit up. Her bursting into the coffee house in her wedding dress was a shock, needless to say. I remember Daniel cheering, thinking that Ross and Rachel would finally get together. He would have to wait a while.
Rachel had changed a bit since the last time I had seen her, but not that much. She was still a bit of a princess, but there was something about her that was loveable, and she fit into the group quickly. Chandler liked her, I knew that much. He thought she was cool. Joey thought she was hot, and Chandler simply shook his head at that. He knew that Rachel was for Ross only.
I soon became obsessed with Ross and Rachel, waiting for them to get together. There were complications naturally, because what love story doesn't have complications? Carol ending up pregnant was a big one and when I asked Daniel how that had happened, he had simply smiled and turned away. Paulo had been another complication and then there had been Julie. But in time, the two finally started dating, and I credit Chandler for that, in a way. He had been the one to tell Rachel how Ross felt, and God knows that Ross would never have told her.
So time went on and I got comfortable; never bored, but simply content with the scene splayed out in front of me. Chandler going out with Janice made me raise my eyebrow more than once, but he had been happy so I had been happy. I couldn't even hate her for kissing her ex husband because it had been a difficult situation. And besides, I liked Janice…Daniel didn't, but he had never spent as much time with her as I had. He didn't see her late at night, when it was only she and Chandler in the room, talking. He didn't know all her amazing qualities, all he knew were her annoying ones, because that was all Ross knew.
But Janice came and went – naturally destined to come along once more, because it was inevitable – and Chandler was alone, but not complaining as much as usual. Rachel and Ross broke up and I felt the need to smack Joey and Chandler on the back of the head, because of the bad advice they had given Ross. But Monica had taken care of it, so I felt relieved.
Things were awkward for a while but I still felt comfortable, simply because I knew things were going to be right in the end. And besides, I wasn't watching over the guy who had slept with the girl from the copy place, Daniel had that job.
Time passed, with a few excitements – the boys being robbed the big one - and then Kathy came along and I felt sad. Chandler was in love and it was with the worst person possible. I felt so sorry for my boy and wished I could make him feel better about it, but I couldn't. So I sat there, watching as Chandler suffered through Joey and Kathy's relationship, and I sat there as Kathy obviously fell in love with Chandler, and I sat there as the two had their forbidden kiss.
I watched Chandler panic, buy new things for their empty apartment and then tell Joey. I worried for a while then, thinking that things wouldn't be right between my two favourite boys again. But they made up and I was happy, because Chandler was happy. Then Kathy slept with Nick and I felt such anger towards both her and Nick, with his giant man nipples. It was around that time that I realised I had started to talk like Chandler, not that it was a bad thing.
So Kathy left and then suddenly things began to happen. Ross met Emily, Rachel met Joshua, the apartments got switched between the boys and the girls – something I never liked because the boys belonged together in Apartment 19 and the girls in Apartment 20 – and then back again and Ross got engaged.
And then I finally got my wish in London, as Chandler and Monica finally got together. Daniel had to calm me down when I started dancing in the middle of the park. I mean, I was slightly upset that Ross became a bit crazy and depressed, but that was Daniel's problem, not mine.
I was proud of Chandler as he moved past his commitment phobias with time, and confessed his love for Monica with the other three in the room. And when came the time for Chandler to propose, I waited with bated breath, only for Richard to interrupt. Things got complicated and I was so close to going down and haunting Richard, when he stepped up and became the nice guy I knew he was. The night ended so wonderfully and I cried so hard watching the two propose to one another. Chandler's words moved me like nothing I had ever felt and I had never been more proud, even though he wasn't mine.
The wedding was beautiful, with Chandler having a small problem with his commitment fear before finally saying 'I do'. That didn't surprise me one bit because I had been waiting for it. But the wedding wasn't my favourite part of that time. No, that was Chandler and Monica flying to Las Vegas and confronting Charles. I thought that I couldn't be more proud of Chandler then I had been, but watching him talk to his dad and inviting him to the wedding was amazing and I realised I had been wrong. I could be more proud of Chandler then I had been and I felt my heart swell watching that scene.
Emma was conceived, born and beautiful, but I knew she was nothing compared to the babies that Chandler and Monica would have. They tried and I got impatient, feeling like a woman desperate to become a grandmother. I guess I was, in a way, going to be a grandmother. That's how it felt to me, obviously not to Chandler. He didn't even know I existed.
They couldn't have children and I was devastated, wanting to do anything I could to fix it. But they fixed it themselves and after nine gruelling months, Jack and Erica were born. Call me crazy, but I could see Chandler in both their faces, even though that was impossible. Watching Chandler hold his son for the first time was possibly the happiest moment of my life ad I wept. Then he held his daughter and I wept some more. They had their babies and they were happy.
It was then that everything changed. Monica and Chandler moved into their new house, Rachel and Ross got back together, Phoebe and Mike started trying for babies and Joey left.
I got quite emotional when Chandler hugged Joey goodbye at the airport, both holding back tears. Although no one was happier about Monica and Chandler being together then me, I still hated the fact that Chandler and Joey had been separated.
But they had been, and it was time to move on.
Chandler watched Joey's plane take off, headed for L.A and the group all sighed in unison, knowing that everything was different.
The twins started to grow and I just knew that Erica would be a clone of her father when she grew up. She was showing the same characteristics Chandler had at that age, and I couldn't wait for her to grow older and start spurting out sarcastic jokes. Jack was a mystery though; he was incredibly quiet and I couldn't figure him out. He was a daddy's boy though, just as Erica was a daddy's girl. I think Monica was slightly jealous of that fact, but was happy when Erica's first words were 'Mommy'. Jack, on the other hand, chose 'dada' as his first word, which pleased Chandler to no end.
Time passed, and everything was wonderful. Chandler talked to Joey regularly and visited every now and then, and I was so proud when Joey started to get good parts. He was living the dream he had longed for.
Rachel and Ross got married – again – when the twins had just started walking, so Monica panicked when Erica wandered off at the wedding reception. Chandler was surprisingly level headed and went searching for his daughter, finding her in the back room, looking like she was entertaining a group of people with baby talk. Chandler had grinned, picked his daughter up and told the crowd that she would be doing stand up by the time she was in preschool. Erica had laughed happily, and I had wondered if she knew what her father was talking about. No, she was too young though.
Rachel had another child, and Daniel was delighted when she chose the name Daniel.
It's like they know me
I had smiled; humouring my husband, all the while secretly wondering if that was true. Did they subconsciously know of our existence?
I think Phoebe did, but she had always been more aware of things then the others. Her and Mike had ended up having triplets, something that amazed both me and everyone that Phoebe knew. What were the odds?
Michael Jr, Joey, and Lily were beautiful and I had adored the names, secretly wishing that she had chosen Chandler. But that name had been chosen for Frank and Alices child, even if it was a girl.
Janice popped up every now and then, like a disease that refused to go away. I'm not sure if it even came as a surprise to Chandler anymore, but he still raised his eyes skyward and muttered each time the woman showed up. It struck me that he might have been trying to talk to me, but that was ridiculous.
Nora moved on when the twins were seven and Chandler had been crestfallen, not knowing what to do without his mother embarrassing him at any given moment. He had put on a brave face, but I knew he was hurting. Joey came back for the funeral and Chandler had been thankful.
I met Nora three days after she stopped, and I couldn't prevent myself from telling her who I was. She had stared at me for a moment, smiled and thanked me for looking after her son. I had told her it was my pleasure and Nora had hugged me.
The twins grew and it was clear who they took after. Like I had suspected, Erica was all Chandler, except without the twisted side he had gotten from his odd childhood. Jack had surprised everyone by taking after his Uncle Ross, and Monica had been annoyed that none of her children were like her. Chandler had pointed out that Jack could be quite obsessive and he had received the glare that he had become accustomed too. I simply laughed each time Monica used that glare, because I knew that Chandler could kiss her and make it go away. He did that this time too.
Chandler began to age once more, something I had forgotten about, having him look the same for many years. The signs appeared first at his temples, with grey beginning to show ever so slowly. He tried to hide it for a while, but gave up dying it soon enough, because Monica found it sexy. Besides, Ross had started to go grey two years beforehand, so he had still beaten him.
The others had aged too, but that didn't concern me. I was watching the boy I had come to know as mine age and it had saddened me. I was still in the body of a twenty one year old. I still looked young.
That's what Joey told me.
He passed when the grey had started to streak other parts of Chandler's head, and I knew that he had stopped before Chandler knew.
Taking my daily walk, I had spotted him from afar and my heart had sunk.
I watched as Chandler answered the phone and found out that his best friend had died in a freak accident on set. I still don't know what sort of accident, all I know is that Chandler had calmly hung up the phone, stared at it for a moment and then broken down in tears. I had done the same.
I talked to Joey a week after he had stopped, taking that long to get the courage up. It pained me to see him because I had loved him like a son as well as Chandler. But I did see him and when I introduced myself he had looked at me, frowned and shook his head. I still remember his words.
But you're so young!
I may be young in appearance, but I am so old in mentality. I told Joey that and he frowned again. Apparently stopping hadn't improved his capability of processing things. I had shaken my head and pulled him into a hug, telling him that I had been watching him for years too. He had smiled at me but I'm not sure if he really understood what I meant. He saw me as a twenty one year old, not the wise old woman that lived behind my hazel eyes.
Chandler moved on from Joey's passing and slowly got back into the swing of things, as did his friends. Phoebe had another child and called it Alice, after her sister in law. I smiled as I thought of her and Mike handling those four kids. Neither Ross and Rachel nor Chandler and Monica wanted any more children; they all thought that two was enough, even though Chandler had wanted three long ago. Things change.
The twins were in high school now and Erica was beautiful and so much like her father I wanted to cry each time I saw her, picturing Chandler that age. Jack had become quite the handsome boy and he had turned out to be more like Monica then anyone had expected, making her a very happy mother indeed.
Emma looked so much like Rachel had when she was younger, and she thankfully hadn't inherited her mother's nose. She was stunning and all the boys were after her. The triplets were growing quickly and were adorable.
Chandler had gone all grey by that time and he looked very distinguished; not old. He actually quite liked his hair that way and so did I, although I missed the young adult I had loved to watch.
Jack met Sarah when he was sixteen and from the moment I first saw her, I knew it was love. She was perfect, and Jack was happy. Chandler liked her too, although Monica seemed a bit wary, not wanting any girl to take her son away any time soon.
The young couple were engaged by the time they were eighteen and were married when they were twenty. It was a beautiful wedding, made all the more beautiful by the fact that Sarah revealed she was pregnant. Monica had been shocked by the news but Chandler had clapped his son on the back and picked Sarah up, dancing around the room with her, wearing suitable shoes at this wedding, unlike his own.
Erica had suddenly come to the conclusion at the wedding that Jack's best friend Matt was quite the charmer and she went after him eagerly. They were dating less than a week after the wedding, Matt unable to resist her charm.
Everything was perfect.
Chandler stopped the day before Jack and Sarah's daughter was born.
It was a shock to everyone Daniel told me. A brain aneurism. I didn't know how the other's reacted, I couldn't watch them anymore. All I knew was what Daniel told me. Monica had broken down in tears, while Erica and Jack had been in shock. Sarah had gone into labour, although it wasn't the happy thing that it should have.
And I had collapsed in tears, unable to believe that my Chandler had moved on.
I saw him that day and I knew that I couldn't wait to speak to him. He had been talking to Joey and I had walked up. Joey had smiled and stepped aside and Chandler had looked at me with an expression that I couldn't place. I had smiled and introduced myself and Chandler's face had broken into his trademark smirk.
I knew someone was watching me.
His words had caused me to break down once more and I had cried in his arms; cried in my son's arms, even if I only looked twenty one. I was so much older, stuck in immortality.
Sarah's daughter had been named Elena and I had wondered if it was subconsciously named after me. I didn't know.
All I knew was that I had a new person to watch over. It seemed fitting, Elena watching Elena. Watching Chandler's grand daughter.
He was upset that he wasn't allowed to watch, but he soon was able to watch Erica's son Billy and he cried the day the baby was born.
Elena is five years old now and I watch her with Chandler at my side, Daniel on the other. Joey and Nora visit often and we love their visits. Johnny comes too and he and Chandler get along wonderfully. My two boys.
Elena is beautiful and I just know that she will have so many stories in her lifetime. If she is anything like her grandfather she will.
And I hope, from time to time that she stops and smells the roses. I hope that when she does, she will realise what a gift life is and think of those passed. I hope that she will simply bask.
And when she joins us, I know that my park will be full with the people I love, and I will move on to my next subject.
As I watch I come to a conclusion.
You don't have to be alive to stop, because up here it can mean a lot more different things. I stop and look at the man I love.
I stop and watch the son that was never mine.
I stop and cry when the people I love cry.
And I stop and simply bask.