Warnings: Mocking of pairings, angry Titans, insulting of Speedy.
Pairings: Many, many implied
Summary: Pairings aside, the Titans will always be friends.
"Robin! That woman is here again!" Raven stalked past her flustered leader, her eyes flashing dangerously. The masked boy sighed and walked towards the main room, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
"Robin, darling! So glad to see you! Your anti-social princess just walked out in a huff; hope I didn't say anything to offend the dear." A prim, redheaded woman stood up, smiling sweetly, "So, can I get a comment? Statement? Anything? I hear your 'friendship' with that sweety Starfire is heating up. Any chance we might see a romance developing here?"
"Ma'am…" Robin edged away from her, obviously scared, "Please, we've asked you before. We don't want to be in the tabloids!"
"But darling! The Teen Titans are celebrities! Don't you think the public deserves to know about you?" She purred and pulled him down next to her on the couch, "Come now! All of your little friends are visiting...14 teenagers living together. You must have some interesting stories."
"Aren't you listening? He doesn't want to answer." A dark eyed boy glanced over from the kitchen area, scowling. The woman spun around and smiled.
"Aqualad! The heart throb himself!" She jumped to her feet, pulling out her notebook, "Aqualad, is it true? Are you dating Speedy? Or did you go for the dark beauty? I'd say Starfire, but I think Robin would have issues with that!"
The atlantian pressed back against the counter, eyes wide, "Speedy? You people think I'm dating Speedy?"
"Oh, so it's not true? What about Bumblebee?" She pressed closer, eyes shining.
"Me and him? Yeah right." The girl in question appeared in the room, obviously miffed.
"Bumblebee! The fighting female of Steel City!"
"I have a title?" She backed away from the overly hyper reporter, "What are you doing here? I thought Robin kicked you out a few days ago."
"So, how about you and Cyborg? Or Speedy! I heard that archer had the hots for you." The redhead didn't even pause for breath as she pressed them for answers, completely ignoring their comments.
"Woah! Me an' Sparky? Me and Speedy? Where the hell are you getting these ideas?" Bumblebee glared, crossing her arms and backing away from her.
"Dude! Lunch time!" Beast Boy ran into the room, leading Kole, Gnarrk, Speedy, Mas y Menos, Hot Spot, Wildebeast, Starfire, Cyborg, and even a reluctant Raven. He stopped short, watching the reporter warily, "Who are you?"
"Oh, I'm Cynthia." She smiled, "Beast Boy, didn't I see you on a date with Raven? Give me all the juicy details!"
"Me and Rae? No way. She hates people." He glanced at the empath nervously.
"All people? I doubt that. How do you feel about Aqualad? Speedy? Robin? Cyborg?" She got closer and closer to Raven, not noticing the way the vein in the girl's forehead was throbbing.
"I don't want to date anyone." Raven said calmly, eye narrowed.
"But what about a fling? Jinx, Starfire, Bumblebee, Terra, AHHH-" Raven watched the woman fly out towards the sea, being carried by a small rope of black aura.
"When will that women learn that we're friends first, and that anything else is no business but our own?" The teens watched Cynthia landed in the water, and even the ones with the best of intentions couldn't help but smile.