I do not own any of these characters, and I do not make any profit. Please don't sue, I have nothing.
In the Rain
By In Articulo Mortis
The rain was beating down hard, it was the early hours of the morning and the sun had not yet risen to flood the quad with light. The garden was asleep, quite sensibly, and seifer would have been too if he hadn't been woken yet again by his dreams. Night after night, he wandered the corridors of garden in search of nothing. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He was searching for, seeking, hoping to catch a glimpse of the boy who filled his nightly thoughts. In the day, they were easier to suppress but in the dark on his own, they ran wild. He had kept this date with the empty corridors every night he had spent in garden, hoping in vain that one night, the object of his desire would revert back to his childhood habits and come running in the dark to seek out the comfort of his strong arms. Back in the orphanage Zell had often suffered with bad dreams and always sort out seifer's comfort. His little, smooth arms wrapping around Seifers neck, it was the only place he had felt safe.
And as if by magic, there he was. The man who had, yet again, invaded Seifers dreams and woken him. His divine body curled, childlike, into a ball barely fitting on the wooden bench. Seifer stopped still. After all these years of wanting this moment, suddenly it scared him. He wanted to run to him, and from him. The bench was sheltered from the most of the downpour by an over hanging branch, but when the wind picked up his small frame was splattered with little droplets.
In the moon light he looked pale, ice like. His tattooed side of his face was visible, and lips were slowly turning blue. He had been there a wile. It hurt, somehow, that Zell was asleep, and not tortured by love as Seifer himself was but he put that to the back of his mind.
Advancing slowly towards the boy he realised he had been standing there a wile and he was soaked. His hair flattened to his head and little droplets of water clinging to the end of his nose. Ducking under the branch, careful not to wake the sleeping Zell, he knelt down by his head. Timidly he reached out his hand, he traced the tattoo with his index finger. Zell nuzzled into his touch, at the movement Seifer pulled away quickly. He was so afraid of this going wrong after so long waiting for it to happen. Zell's eyes flicked open to see who it was who had touched him so tenderly. Who he saw was not who he was expecting. Sitting bolt upright he tried to clear his sleepy head.
"Fuck, Seifer, does the disciplinary committee work all night too?"
"Okay, I'm sorry, I like the rain, I came out to listen to it. Why the hell do you have to be so god damn... " He trailed of when he saw the confusion in Seifers eyes. "But why the are you out here, you cant get me into trouble, how would you say you saw me?"
Seifer got up of his knees and sat next to Zell on the bench. Feeling completely unmasked. His walls were down, they hadn't had time to build themselves up. He put his head in his hands.
"I'm not going to rat on you Zell. I'm not here as part of the disciplinary committee."
On remembering the touch that woke him, Zell gave Seifer a weird look.
"What are you doing out here then?"
Zell scoffed. The sound was alien to this...intimate situation. It seemed to echo of the walls of the quad.
"Seifer, are you...okay? You look ill."
Seifer sighed, and laughed. It was just a small laugh, but it was genuine. The new sound made Zell feel safe, like there was no threat. Like back in the orphanage. Stopping that thought, Zell looked away from his company, his memories of seifer were painful ones. His mind travelled over the memory he had of last time he was alone with seifer in the rain.
"yep" and he chuckled to himself, he was freezing.
Seifer, his mind reeling, swallowed hard and began to take of his coat. He shifted the long grey signature from his back and nervously put it round Zell's shoulders. Catching his breath as Seifers arm brushed his back, Zell was screaming inside.
Seifer leaned back on the bench. He wasn't sitting in his usual arrogant pose, he had his hands folded in his lap, his knees weren't spread wide and his smirk was absent.
He pulled the coat around him, revelling in Seifers warmth and his intoxicating smell. He tilted his head slightly, and looked directly into the other mans eyes.
"I miss you".
It was simple, and sudden but they both new of what time it was referring to. Both new the other was thinking about the time in the rain, the last time they were friends.
Zell waited for Seifers answer but none came, he turned his head away but as he did so he heard a faint chocked sob.
"I miss you too Zell"
Zell glanced at the man sitting next to him, he had hunched himself forward, his head in his hands. He looked as though all the strength holding him up has suddenly left him. Shuffling over on the bench, Zell pressed his side against the bigger man, draped the grey trench coat so it covered both there shoulders. He timidly snaked one arm around Seifers back, partly to hold the coat in place, partly desperate for some bodily contact. Seifer sniffed his face ever so slightly peered at Zell through his fingers, something equally close to fear as it was relief cross his features.
Lowering his hands, he rested his elbows on his knees and continued to stare at the gravel under foot. He felt Zell rest his head gently on his shoulder.
"I didn't mean it to go like this" he mummered. And smiled gently at the smaller blond. His eyes were ever so slightly reddened but the path his tears had made was hidden by the rain. "I've played this out in my head more times than I can remember. Every night since…" he looked back at the floor. "I have been waiting to tell you I'm sorry".
"You have no reason to b…."
"Just shush will you? I want this of my chest" His tone was playful but sad. Zell closed his lips. "I never meant to do what I did. It just happened and I couldn't take it back. I wanted so badly to take it back that looking at you began to hurt."
"But you d..."
"Hush! I couldn't stand the thought of you hating me"
"Hating you? Seifer I don't, never did hate you. I was just scared. What are you sorry for? It was my stupid mistake".
"But under that tree, I…and then you ran. That look you gave me"
"But Seifer, I kissed you. You took my hand and I mistook it fo…."
"You kissed me? But I… and then you broke it and looked at me with such fear. You were afraid of me".
"We were holding hands under that huge tree in the rain, both of us soaked through. And I was the happiest I can remember ever being. We had spent the hole day together, playing hi…"
"Hide and seek. With Selphie, and we kept hiding together. She said it ruined the game". He smiled.
"Then we ran off, and we were holding hands, and I couldn't stop myself. I leaned over and kissed you. And when I realised what I had done I pulled away and I couldn't bear to look you in the face. So I ran".
Zell looked at Seifer. It felt so good to be able to say that to him, to explain that he hadn't meant to do it. That it was an accident. One that he deeply regretted.
"But Zell, I kissed you. You just looked so cute, soaked through, happy. I kissed you and then you pulled away, and you left me under the tree. On my own and with nothing but regret left in me".
Zell turned to face him, confusion playing on his wet brow.
"And then when I came back to the house you wouldn't look at me. I was so angry with myself, with you for reacting like you did. It hurt, it still hurts".
"Seifer I thought you hated me. You picked on me from that day on".
"I didn't, Oh I didn't Zell".
Both men looked blankly, dazed across the courtyard. The silence was only broken but a shiver from Zell. Seifer leaned over and wrapped both arms around the smaller man.
"Why did you kiss me?". Zell whispered into the strong shoulder.
"Why did you kiss me?" He returned, reluctant to make the jump. Still unsure of the situation.
"Because I was, I guess, in love with you. I wanted to be more than just your friend. I managed to looses both in one foul swoop".
"Is that all in the past for you?" Seifer whispered, barely audible. He didn't really want to know.
Moving away from Zell very slowly, trying to not cause the same confusion a second time around, but desperate to look into the younger mans eyes. He wasn't disappointed. The blue shone through the darkness, the hope and fear in them obvious. He simply leaned forward again, very slowly, and pressed his lips to Zell's softly. Zell lifted his hand moving them to Seifer's back and neck, he kissed back. He opened his mouth ever so slightly, just enough that if it was wanted it could be taken.
Seifer dipped his tongue into the bliss that he had wanted so badly since a night very similar to this too long ago.
Getting the reassurance he needed Zell deepened the kiss. Pushing against Seifer's lips. There teeth clashed, and there tongues entwined and it was only broken by the need to breath. Between them there breaths created a mist in the cold night air.
Seifer made a move to stand up, but was stopped by the sudden panic in Zell's eyes.
"I'm not going anywhere. But you are cold and so am I. Lets get dry and warm?".
Pulling Zell up by his hand and not letting go of it, there fingers intertwined as the walk back towards the dark halls of Garden.
In total, but comforting silence they made there way back to Seifer's dorm. Zell smiled gently at the familiar but assumed -lost feeling that filled him. He wanted to be warm and to sleep and be with the tall blond who was gripping his hand so tightly.
As the door swished closed behind him, Zell became aware of how cold and wet he was. Shivering uncontrollably he stood dripping onto the carpet.
Leading him into the bathroom Seifer turned on the shower, it steamed into life.
Peeling the soaking t-shirt of Zell, his nipples small and hard. Undoing the belt and sliding the jeans down his well formed calves.
Seifer taking care of his own clothes watched as Zell removed his boxers and stepped into the heat. He followed, squeezing the soap into his hands and beginning to rub Zell down.
The water felt so good on his back. He was numb, but in bliss. His mind was fuzzy with sleep and warmth and the safety of his best friend beside him. Squeezing some soap of his own into his palms he shared in washing Seifer's larger, broader body.
The dorm showers were made for a single person and so they were forced into each other, Zell pushed up against Seifers chest.
When Zell stretched up onto his tiptoes and put a hand around the back for the taller mans neck they began a slow, lazy kiss that lasted well out of the shower. Through the wrapping in towels and steering Zell backwards towards the bed. It only broke as Zell's knees hit the bed and he dropped backwards.
Hope you liked it.