I don't have a fanfic account as I don't submit stories so can't login but I think this story is greatly lacking in grammar, and I have to re-read many parts of it to make basic sense of it. I wanted to give up on this story but I hate to walk away leaving it half finished.
Having worked with abused women who come from various backgrounds of this kind, I feel much of this doesn't ring true and although I'm not prepared to call you a liar, I do however think you need to reassess why you are doing this. It's a little unhealthy and mentally disturbing if you are lying, just to tug on people's heartstrings in the name of getting reviews.
And writing this and putting other people's names and faces in place to play out your story isn'thealthy as you have kind of distanced yourself and put it all in what we call a third dimension and made it not real.
And finally...I read this story elsewhere, exactly the same scenario with scenes very similar by an older, more experienced writer who has way more reviews for her superb writing skills.
I think it's a little too unreal here. Rape victims don't define themselves as rape victims, its one of the last things they reveal about themselves.
I think you've got some thinking to do.
Lorin – I have a few grammatical errors to point out to you. I have copied your review and I'm going to put everything I fixed grammatically in italics, bold, and underlined [including incorrect spellings.] First I would like to address what you have said to me which I find extremely insulting.
- I would never lie about something so serious or tragic.
- If you read this story elsewhere I have tried writing it before on a different account name it was hotstuff9807. That was also a long time ago. Maybe whoever you've read the story that has striking resemblances to my own was ripped from me by someone who has more writing experience.
- Keep in mind that it has been nearly six years since I was raped and I've been to group counseling and therapy for four years. My therapist is in fact the one who encouraged me to write this. I don't think you have a doctorate degree in therapy or psychology.
- Are you a rape victim that you know anything that goes on in our minds? Have you ever been forcefully held down and raped? I don't think so and I hope you never will be, but until you have you'd never understand me or any other victims that you think you do. It's different for everyone.
- And hey maybe you could send me the link to that story and hey why don't you take a look at the publish dates before you send it.