in Head & Heart


NOTE: This is set before 'normal is the watchword' - perhaps intended as a flash-back scene for that episode. I dont own any of the characters etc, etc - they are all Rob Thomas's.


A particularly hefty and pointed sigh escaped his lips as he approached the petite blonde sitting on the water fountain edge at the top of his driveway. If he'd known she was here he would have hopped right back into his yellow beast and gone to crash at Dick and Cassidy's, but she had craftily parked down an adjoining street he never ventured along…. And since she'd already spotted him there was no turning back and running away; especially since she was the one who should be leaving.

His brow creased as he tried to recall whether or not he'd changed the gate's security code password, but then he nodded as a reality check hit him; whether he'd changed it or not, Veronica Mars would have found a way in.

As he came closer she turned and lifted the top off a thermos that was sitting beside her, pouring dark coffee into the lid, she slowly stood and lifted her head warily to watch as his face became darker and darker as he approached.

"Good morning" he murmured, looking straight ahead and not stopping - he walked briskly past her, heading for his front door.

Veronica sighed and shook her head slightly, turning on her heel to follow him.

"Its one thirty in the afternoon" she mumbled after him.

He heard her remark but chose not to respond. She'd become somewhat used to his routine of staying out late and arriving home mid-afternoon while they were dating. He just hated that even though they weren't together anymore, she'd still reserved the right to give him that holier-than-thou, "I'm really disappointed in you" look.

As he reached the door and pushed a key in the lock, she wondered just how regular this routine had become. Was he doing this every day, or just once a fortnight like during the summer?

She stood behind him, careful to leave a few meters of space between them. Lamely still holding the cup of coffee in her hand she took a deep breath, closed her eyes and said his name.

"Logan?"

She heard the keys jangle and knew that he had turned around and was looking at her now.

"I just need to talk" she said quickly.

"Yeah well that doesn't work for me, so if you don't mind getting the hell off my property…." He began.

"This is important" she interrupted.

He rolled his eyes. Did she think he hadn't guessed that? Ever since her dad pinned him against the wall 4 months ago she hadn't said a word to him and avoided him like the plague. Now, suddenly out of the blue she turns up on his doorstep? Yeah, he knew this was something important, to her anyway. Why else would she have come out of hiding?

She opened her eyes, looked down at the black coffee in her hands and then back up to him, his eyes cold and tired just stared back at her, waiting.

"Five minutes", she breathed.

A smirk crossed his face, "are you offering me a quickie, Veronica?"

She shook her head slightly, and despite the fact that it was telling her to just walk away and forget about it, her heart had her feet pinned.

"Logan, please?" she stepped forward and he continued to stare at her. She reciprocated; except that where his eyes were hard and menacing, hers were pleading.

He didn't say anything, only let out another annoyed sigh and turned around, rotating the key and pushing his front door open, he stridently walked inside; but didn't close the door behind him. She gave a small nod and followed him inside, closing the door and placing the coffee on a table, she walked through the main entrance peeking into the adjoining rooms, searching for him.

"Five minutes" he called, from the kitchen – she walked quickly to the end of the entrance.

He was leaning against the counter pouring himself a cup of black coffee, just the way he liked it.

"Speak" he said as he poured.

Veronica took a moment to notice the spotless kitchen, and to think of the spotless, un-lived in quality of the other rooms. She guessed he hadn't been staying home a lot lately – understandable.

"How are you Logan?" she asked sincerely – he could hear it in her voice, that softness of honesty that made his heart hurt a little and his palms sweaty. He didn't like that feeling anymore, not when Veronica Mars initiated it.

His eyes looked up, "Well I feel better than you look" putting the jug of coffee away and turning to lean against the counter he stared her down; "you've really let yourself go since we broke up", he felt his heart ease and palms dry as a quick look of hurt flashed across her face – to most it would have been unnoticeable, but he knew her too well, and reveled now in noticing it.

She swallowed, and tried to ignore her head as it told her to run again. She could have wise-cracked right back at him, but considering the bombshell she was about to drop, she decided against any sort of verbal abuse.

He saw her struggling with her thoughts and rolled his eyes, "cut the Oprah crap and get on with using up those 5 minutes".

"I wanted you to hear this from me" she quickly spat out, deciding the only way she could say this was if she wasn't looking into his eyes. Her head dropped and her heart raced, "Duncan and I are together now…"

Had Veronica been looking up at him, she would have been privy to a very rare look of true anguish that came and went in Logan Echolls's eyes.

After an expanse of silence had engulfed them, Veronica lifter her head to see Logan staring back at her, his eyes unchanged, still cold and tired and showing no signs of caring or even recognizing the information she had just blurted out.

"I thought I would…." She began.

"That's great" Logan interrupted in a slightly menacing up-beat tone, placing his coffee cup on the table-top.

"Logan, we didn't…" she started, but he interrupted her again.

"I always knew you crazy kids would work things out and reignite the flame…." He smiled, menacingly.

"Don't do this, please…"

"Do what Veronica!" he yelled so loudly into the silence that Veronica jumped slightly.

He shook his head and stared at her again, "What? Did you want me to break-down?"

"N-n-no…" she stammered, caught off guard.

"Did you want me to beg you to choose me over him? Or maybe call Duncan right now and demand that we duel for you're affections?" he laughed maliciously at her stunned and slightly frightened expression.

"Well then what, Veronica? What do you want me to do?"

She didn't say anything.

"What?"

"I-I don't know!" she yelled back, feeling her eyes swell with tears.

He smiled again and lightly chuckled, "cause, to tell you the truth, I could care less…"

"I wanted to tell you because…"

"…Because you thought I would give a damn and I don't, sorry to disappoint". He cut in.

"No" she said lamely.

"Then what?" he yelled, slamming his hands on the table-top, causing Veronica to look up just as Logan shook his head and turned away from her.

"I told you because contrary to what you believe…" she started, hoping he would look at her for this part, but he didn't, so she went on; "…I did care about you, that wasn't the reason we broke up"

He started to laugh again, but she wasn't about to let him wreck this, it was too important. "….I cared about you and still do…" at that he fell silent, but still didn't turn to look at her. "…And you can believe whatever you want, but I wanted to tell you about Duncan and me because I care about you too much to let you hear it through the grapevine and risk hurting you more than I know I already have…." She turned on her heel and started storming for the front door.

Logan let her go, even though his heart had started to ache and his palms had become clammy when he listened to her words, laced with that soft honesty. He wanted to go after her, maybe to beg her to choose him over Duncan, maybe just to say thank-you…. But he didn't, because despite what his heart was telling him to do, his head had his feet firmly planted….

THE END


NOTE: This is my first ever 'Veronica Mars' fanfic as I have only just discovered (and consequently become addicted) to this wonderful TV show. I would really appreciate any reviews, even if they are criticisms. Thank's.