A Purrfect Relationship

Chapter 3

The Squid and the Spider

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters, or locations. Harry Potter is copyrighted © J. K Rowling and Warner Brothers. All rights reserved.

In the end, I was Stupefied and was unable to continue my fierce defending of my love. Fortunately, she still roams the corridors, which leads me to believe she was not brutally murdered by my aggressor, who, as she tells me now, is her pet, Argus Filch.

I think she might like me now – but she doesn't let me go out rat hunting with her. My preferred time is in the night, but she refuses, as that is when she must patrol for students out of beds too late. I suggest she just sneaks away, but she's too much like my owner. A rule would sooner break her than she'd break one.

Though, she might still remember what happened last time she snuck away and went mousing with me. Let me tell you.

Her pet was asleep, so we snuck off together, purring as we went. We leapt up to a window, and quietly edged out it. Then a horrible sound met our ears.

Trees in the forest were falling down every second, and water was splashing all over from the black lake. I thought it was the end of the world, and I was scar – but because of my noble family line, I would never be scared, and stood bravely to protect my love.

As seven trees near the edge of the forest fell, the water splashing was multlipied, and a huge abomination came out of the Forbidden Forest.

It was the size of a small elephant – and it had too many legs to be allowed. It tromped slowly toward the black lake, crashing into things as it went. The splashing water increased more and more.

And then it stopped. For a moment, I hoped whatever was making it had died. But a horrible sound met our ears.



Ms. Norris, as I have learned as the name of my love, meowed quietly to me, that the giant squid was performing its mating dance. We immediately jumped back up to the window in absolute shoc – but I was brave! – and lay quiver – um, wait, that was what Ms. Norris did! Yeah! She quivered, I was just petrified in shoc – this, um, is all. Um, a joke, you know! I'm really brave. Sort of. A little. Okay, not really.

That was a terrible occasion. But right now, I'm dining on rooster with my love. I killed one belonging to that ugly gamekeeper – he won't miss it.

Really, our relationship is just that. It's purrfect. It's a purrfect relationship.

But maybe I'll ask her if she wants to have kittens someday…

So that's my story. I am Crookshanks. King of charming nice little lady cats.


(Random Sort Of Author's Note A Little Sort Of Maybe Only A Little I Promise Well Maybe Not Really: I guess that's it. Sort of short, eh? Well, I didn't really have much in mind. It's just a nice little happy relationship. A purrfect one.)