Warning : This story is unbeta-ed.
Harry Potter: Frienship and Love
Guardian of Jupiter
He had always been a fool. He didn't need Malfoy's scathing words to know that. He didn't need Fred and George's teasing jokes to realize that. He was a fool. He was a fool ever since Harry had saved him from the second task in Triwizard Tournament. He was a fool to try to find the deeper meaning of him being the thing that Harry would miss the most. He was a fool to even think there was even a meaning behind the whole thing.
And to make the whole thing seemed even more foolish, he was a fool to stop himself from finding the deeper meaning when he realized there was none.
Tell him, was being in love made someone lost whatever little sense left in him? Or was only being in love with the great, undefeatable Harry Potter made him the way he was? He kept hurting himself; he couldn't stop himself. He knew Harry would never see him more than just a friend that would always be there to protect him, to cheer him and to love him. A friend… just a friend.
And it hurt. It hurt so much. It hurt when Harry talked with such adoration about Cho Chang during fifth year. It hurt when Harry developed admiration and love to Ginny during their sixth year. It hurt when Harry started going out with Hermione on the final year. And it never stop hurting even when Harry stopped seeing anybody else.
His heart hurt. And he had wanted to stop the hurting. So he threw himself completely into his Auror job. Literally. Danger and pain meant nothing to him. And if it was to protect Harry, he would do it without a moment of hesitation.
No one knew. No one would ever know. It was a time of chaos. And he was insignificant. He lived to protect the man he loved until Harry could kill Lord Voldemort himself.
He loved Harry unselfishly. He loved Harry unconditionally. He would keep on giving whatever little happiness of his to Harry. He would keep on giving whatever little spark of life of his to Harry. No matter how many times Harry had hurt him he would keep on giving until he was drained and dry. Even then, he would not stop.
He couldn't stop.
Because being in love with Harry Potter had made him foolish.
It was a mission by the Ministry. Harry needed to be in this one and the number of people was restricted to two. So naturally, he volunteered to go with Harry. He saw Harry flashed a smile of gratitude to him. A familiar feeling of pain squeezed inside of him. This wasn't the last time he wished the smile was more than just gratitude or friendly affectionate. Sometimes he wondered why the pain never numbed down; it was only getting worse.
And whether the increasing pain could kill him one day.
But he returned the smile with one of his silly smiles. No one knew. No one would ever know. The pain was his to bear. He was the foolish one, remember?
So, they went and unthinkable happened. The mission given by the Minister was actually a trap, set up by the Death Eater and right now they were cornered.
He and Harry were hiding behind a thick wooden old wardrobe. He had cast an invisibility spell around the wardrobe, trying to buy some time to conjure up any plan to save both of their life. Right now, they were sitting facing each other, sharing the limited space; knees brushing.
"What a mess we got ourselves into, Harry…" He muttered with that same silly smile lingered the corner of his lips. His now-long red hair had long lost its band and the wavy hair run away wildly. Bruises and small cuts were here and there and the smile still lingered.
"Yeah," he watched Harry sighed and leaned against the wall of the wardrobe. Beautiful… He thought so many times and still the awe was as if he just noticed of Harry dark beauty. The shadow was perfect for Harry as silhouette strangely highlighted his strong jaws and high cheekbones. So beautiful…
Ache spread slowly. Every time he thought just how beautiful Harry was, the same ache grew. Stop it… stop torturing yourself…
"I thought Ministry has stopped sending us to suicide missions after Fudge resigned for the second time," Harry continued as a ghost of smirk curved on his lips.
He forced himself to look away. After all these years; after all those missions they were together, why didn't the feeling get easier? He was 23, the feeling should be fading. But nothing changed. Nothing would ever change. "The mission was a brilliant trap, Harry." He adjusted his seating. "No one could see this coming."
Harry put out his hands and grabbed both of his hands. "Ron."
And he had to look into Harry glittering emerald eyes when he said his name like that. "Yeah, Harry?"
"This is bad… I mean very bad." Harry's voice was solemn and deadly serious. "I don't think…" His words stopped just like that, meaning was hanging and unfinished.
His smile was there, ready and reassuring. He squeezed back his hands, holding back the enormity of his love from flowing so freely like always did ever since he opened his eyes and saw Harry looked down at him worried; both of them were drenched from the Second Task. "I know."
And he did.
Their position was the most vulnerable spot, leaving them no way to run. The invisibility spell he cast was temporary before the wandering, searching Death Eaters found them. And in this situation, there was only way for survival.
"It is either both of us or one of us can be the bait to let the other run." He said softly, his grip was never weakened for even a second.
He watched Harry's shining green eyes went wide with understanding. Harry understood his gravity words. And from the way his lips moved, he knew Harry would protest… violently.
"No." Harry's word was uttered quietly but he could feel the steel-strong determination to make him accept the meaning.
"Would you rather both of us die here?" His tone sounded incredulous.
"Yes." Harry was being stubborn. Again.
"For nothing? For a mission that isn't a mission but a well-planned trap?"
"No, I will not die for nothing or for the mission," Harry whispered urgently, pulling himself closer to him. Their knees were no longer brushing; they were entwined. Harry was torturing him; there was no way he could stop the ache from killing him.
Love, sometimes, was a terrible thing to be found.
"I will die with you."
Harry's words stilled him. Something burst inside of him and he was choking. Harry should never say something like that. Harry should never act like that! Because he would start looking for deeper meaning that was nothing. And he would hurt some more. And he would fall deeper in love. And he would…
His next words were choked out. "I don't want you to die with me."
"Ron!" Harry pulled his hand, bringing his body into his embrace. Harry's embrace was strong and sure… a friend's embrace. And it would always be a friend's embrace. He had never dreamed of asking Harry for more. Taking was never his nature… always giving and giving and giving… "You are my… my best friend, Ron. My whole life was always defined by you. I couldn't imagine what my life would be without you…"
Again those kinds of words. How could he stop himself for hoping that someday… How could he stop himself for thinking that there were deeper meaning… How could he stop himself from being a stupid, foolish… Harry didn't know. His words were for the strong, long friendship that they had. Harry didn't know that his best friend kept misinterpreting his words.
He put his arms willingly around Harry, resting his forehead against the curve of Harry's neck, even though it was the very person that caused so much, too much pain to him. Like a moth drawn to fire. The heat would never burn hot enough for it to fly away; only death could pull it apart. "Yes, I know."
"But you're the one to stop Voldemort, Harry." The name no longer scared him. Ever since he had fallen in love with Harry, no threat of pain could compare the suffering of being with Harry but never close enough. He was now fearless; but only for Harry. "Not me, not others."
"I hate that prophecy!" Harry whispered vehemently. "I'm nobody's savior, I'm just Harry. Why can't you see that?"
He had to smile at Harry's words. Harry kept on saying those words ever since the incident in Department of Mystery but yet, he kept on saving people again and again. "You know I do see that you want to be just Harry."
And his answer had always been the same. Harry rolled his eyes.
"The answer is still no, Ron."
Stubborn. Sometimes, he wondered whether Harry only allowed himself to sacrifice to others. "There's no other way, Harry." He insisted. "After all, you know that you'd have much better chance of escaping than me. I'm not that very good in offensive spells and you know my luck is always rotten."
"Stop saying things like that." Harry frowned.
He chuckled softly. "But you don't deny it."
"I am now."
Then he stopped chuckling. Somberly, he straightened his back and raised his eyes to look at Harry's eyes. "My spell will be found by the Death Eaters soon. We can't hide until the Order come to find us. It would be too late, then, for any plan."
"Ron… you know whatever your argument is, I will not leave you." Harry said, leaving no room for him to say anything.
"Then, what do you proposed us do?" He challenged.
Harry just shrugged and smiled. "We can always run out like crazy and hope that Death Eaters will not kill us."
He wanted to argue. He really wanted to argue. But he had been with Harry for so long that he knew when Harry's expression was fixed like that, no amount of argument could sway him from his decision. And their time was running out.
"Are you sure about this, Harry?" He asked.
"At least I'm surer than the proposition to leave you alone." Harry grinned.
He had to sigh. "Well, if you say so…"
And that was they did. They burst out from the wardrobe, casting protection spells like crazy as Death Eaters shot out deadly lights at them. Lights of different colors flew around the area and Ron used his wand to cast protection spell, mostly to protect Harry than himself. He ran slightly behind Harry because he knew that was where mostly Death Eaters were.
They ran and ran until he felt Harry pulled his arm into a direction unknown. He was busy looking back, using every protection spell he had ever known. Trust him when he said he knew a lot of them. He studied protection spells more then offensive spells, merely because his foolish mind thought he could protect everyone he loved.
"Ron! In here!" Harry yelled; to be heard above the sound of debris.
"Do you know where we are going!" Ron yelled back. Impulsively he cast another defensive spell in the doorway which they had just gone through. From inside, Ron looked with grim satisfaction when his spell bounced back the outside Death Eaters' spells.
"I think so!" Harry kept on running and dragging Ron with him. His grip on Ron's wrist tightened like he knew something bad was going to happen.
And something bad did happen. As they took a turn, they came into an area. Ron wished they could put an adjective 'empty' before the word 'area' because the area was not empty. Four Death Eaters were there, pointing their wands at them.
"Crucio!" Four of them shouted out the forbidden spell at the same time.
"No!" Ron acted out twelve-year-worth-of-habit of protecting Harry as he pushed Harry down and immediately swung his wand in front of him. One by one Crucio cast by the Death Eaters reflected by Ron until the last one that he didn't see. The spell hit him shockingly and Ron could feel the familiar twisting and clawing pain of the forbidden spell.
It wasn't the first time Ron tasted Crucio but it didn't mean the pain was any lesser.
"Ron!" Harry's eyes went wide at the sight of Ron lying and writhing in pain. But he recovered quickly, cast an Expelliarmus to unwand the offender and pulled back the still–shock and panting redhead back behind the corner from where they came in earlier.
"Damn it! Are you alright!" Harry demanded, his eyes raking his friend's whole body.
Ron groaned as he tried to quickly sit up. His nerves insisted a few more minutes of lying back; the shock from Crucio spell still vibrated painfully. "I'm fine… We've got to hurry…" Ron answered, catching a breath; his face pale from the shock and pain.
He saw Harry's green eyes narrowed angrily at the Death Eaters. "Not yet. We've got to get rid the damn Eaters off our back."
Ron's blue eyes went wide at Harry's tone. "…Harry…?"
"I said not yet." Then, to Ron's utterly surprise, Harry cast out a spell that he rarely used. Conjuring up a snake, Harry hissed out his commands and together; Harry and his snake, stepped out from their hiding spot. Ron didn't quite catch the next spell that Harry used but the light's color was brilliant yellow and it hit directly at the Death Eater that cast Crucio at him earlier.
And the Eater just died, instantly.
He was shocked. It certainly didn't look like Avada Kedavra. Avada was green. But what else could it be? When another Death Eater screamed in pain as the snake that Harry's conjured up earlier wrung around his neck and an audible crack was heard loudly, Ron shook out from his stupor and ran forward to cast protection spell to cover both him and Harry from the flying spells.
A few minutes later, they had four Death Eater around them; all of them dead. Harry only killed one with the yellow-colored spell and the other three's necks were broken.
"What was that all about?" Ron asked, looking at Harry. "At most we just petrify them and leave the Minister to deal with them."
He saw Harry looked at him at such intensity. It was the look that he had never saw Harry used to him before. And he noticed the way Harry gripped his wand tightly.
But Harry just took his hand again and dragged Ron to the exit direction. After a few minutes of silence, Ron spoke up again. It was the kind of silence that choked him up and Ron didn't like that. Especially if it came from Harry.
"Harry…?" Ron frowned. "Harry, talk to me…"
"It could have been Avada Kedavra…" Harry muttered.
At that Harry stopped at look at his friend. Again that look. Ron felt a shiver ran up his spine from both the look and the hand that cupped his jaw powerfully. With Harry hand grasped his face, Ron looked at his best friend in wonder. "The damn Crucio. It could have been Avada Kedavra!"
And then Ron understood.
"What the hell were you thinking?" Harry's eyes were glittering with such anger. "Pushing me down so you could take the spell that was meant for me!"
"…Harry…" Ron spoke up hopelessly, wanting to tell the man in from of him that he didn't matter. He never did matter. Harry was. So what if he took the spell for him? He would use his body as a shield for as long as it takes if that would keep Harry safe. But he couldn't tell Harry all that. He somehow knew that Harry would not understand the enormity of love and desperation inside of him.
"No!" Harry cut in harshly. "No! Don't you dare say about the damn prophecy! I don't care what the whole world think but I would not and could not let you die for me!"
"You know that whatever I do, it is never about the prophecy," Ron said back, his hand reached up to soften Harry's steel grip at his jaw. "You are my whole… my best friend."
Harry frowned. "And what do you think you are to me?"
Ron tried to look away but Harry's grip was too strong.
"Ron…?" The frowned carved deeper. "You are the only thing that connects me to this world. I fit in nowhere but beside you. You know I could not take it if it is you who die because of me."
"Death is inevitable, Harry," Ron whispered.
"Don't you think I don't notice? You were killing yourself these past few years and you still are. You are the one who asking for death." Harry's tone filled with sadness. "Why? Is it because of me?"
It is always because of you. Ron thought helplessly. The ache inside of him was clawing from inside but he had no more tears left to shed. He was drain and dry… I connect you to this world, but Harry, I really wish I have the courage to tell you that you are my whole world.
"I wish to see you alive after each mission," Ron said instead, his voice was hoarse. "I wish to see my… my best friend has the chance of all the happiness that he has been denied."
And then, Harry pulled Ron close in an embrace so tight that Ron nearly choked; mostly from the feeling that he could not contain. And the tears that he thought he could no longer shed slipped out. It was amazing how much Harry could bring out of him even when he thought he was long drain and dry.
Even when they were this close, Ron marveled how much it hurt.
"Ron, I love you." Harry whispered harshly, pulling the leaner man closer.
Ron could hear the word perfectly. He could feel the breaths that warmed his cheek. He could almost taste the bitterness of such words. You love me as a best friend… But I love you as a lover… And to hear you speak out such words as if you love me the way I wanted you to… "I know, Harry…" Ron whispered back, as more tears slid down. He was glad that Harry could not see his tears.
"I don't know what I would do without you."
Please stop… Ron begged silently. Stop torturing me with words like that… His heart was breaking so loud, surely Harry could hear it.
And they stayed like that for few minutes, savoring each precious moment of togetherness that came so rare between them lately. They were like lovers dancing but the music had stopped and they had stopped too, only they didn't realize that the dance was no longer there.
Harry inhaled the bittersweet scent on Ron's neck, which he had unconsciously bent his head to smell. Ron smelled of the only happiness he had during his childhood. Ron smelled of loyalty that never ceased to amaze him. Ron smelled of unconditional love that he knew Ron would never ask anything from him in return. Ron smelled of generosity, laughter and everything that was beautiful.
Ron might not know this, but every morning Harry woke up; alive and happy, he gave thanks for giving Ron in his life. When he saw Ron that later day, he gave thanks for the chance to see his friend that day. And when he saw Ron laughed and his freckled face flushed with laughter, he gave thanks for giving Ron happiness.
Ron was everything that Harry gave thanks to. Everyday and every moment.
And Harry did love him. More than he could love anybody else. More than he could love Cho, Ginny or Hermione. More than he could love himself.
The realization hit him like bolts of lightning.
The moments melted away like they always did. The danger was still around them. Harry breathed in Ron's scent one last time and brushed his lips against the spot under his ear before pulling away.
And he saw the traces of tears on Ron's cheeks no matter how hard the redhead tried to hide them. Harry caught a glimpse of heart-breaking sadness that squeezed his heart painfully before the emotion was completely wiped out. Ron gave a brittle smile as he looked away.
"Let's go." Harry said, promising to himself that he would get Ron to tell him the reason of such sadness that he saw.
Ron nodded wordlessly and together they ran.
It was before then, their luck ran out as they stumbled into a dead-end and when they retraced their steps back, Death Eaters, too many for them to handle, blocked their way. Both of them retreated quickly. Harry conjured up snakes, hissing commands and Ron pulled Harry closer to him as he used his wand to draw three circles on the ground around them, like layers. He stood a little in front Harry and mumbled out three different defensive spells, each one for each layer.
Then, when Harry found one of the many Death Eaters within their sight, he shouted Expelliarmus and Accio-ing the wand toward them as Ron petrified the particular Eater.
"One down, many to go." Ron grinned.
"Yeah, you'd think Voldemort is afraid of us by sending this many Eaters." Harry said back, returning the grin.
They bantered lightly, each knowing that their end was drawing near and yet refused to let the last few moments of their life being afraid. Eaters flung out spells from far, apparently was afraid of the most outer layer of Ron's defensive circle. It increased their survival time because they could avoid the attacks much more easily at this range.
The snakes slithered around the Death Eaters and screamed could be heard here and there. Harry cast many spells but much to Ron's observation, not once did Harry used the yellow-colored spell that he saw earlier when Harry avenging the Crucio-caster.
Time went on and both of them had their own share of Crucio, burns and cuts; attacks that they couldn't avoid. Their energy was draining out and Ron's protection spells were weakening as a result of tiring wizard that cast them.
"Stop struggling, you fools!" Ron heard the shout behind him and skillfully conjured up a Protego to thwart the burning spells in time. "You are outnumbered! Give yourself up!"
"You can all go straight to hell!" Harry shouted with such anger. "In fact, I will be the one to send you there, no charge at all!"
Ron quirked a twisted smile at Harry's word. Even at this rate of magic usage, Harry still had energy to exchange shouts with one of the Eaters while he could barely raised his arm to cast another spell. "Good words, Harry," Ron said softly.
Eventually, they were pushed backward and backward until Ron drew the last new protection circles and hit his back hard at the wall behind him, magically drained. "…That's it Harry… I'm done…"
Harry panted when he shot out another snake at the Dead Eaters and looked back to see Ron barely had the energy to stand up properly. It didn't surprise him because Harry knew how much a defensive circle consumed the wizard's energy. And Ron conjured up three defensive circles at a time and renewed them four times already. Without Ron's spells, Harry knew none of them could make this far.
"I was waiting for you to be done." Harry joked, wiping sweat that tickled down. "That was one hell of magic usage…"
Ron smiled as he blearily looked up at Harry. "You think so? Personally… I think I… drained too quickly…" Ron panted.
"Tell that Mad-Eye…" Harry muttered.
Looking out at the swarming Death Eaters, though their numbers had been reduced noticeably, Ron said, "This is really, really sucked…"
Harry laughed as his hand reached out to grasp his friend's. Ron reached out back instinctively. And their hands found each other, sharing the last of their courage together.
Even at this moment, Harry gave another thank for allowing him to spend his last moments together with the person that mattered to him the most. Harry was thankfully to have Ron's warm hand wrapped around him.
And with Ron with him, Harry thought that death didn't feel so scary anymore.
"Ready, Harry?" Ron whispered as he watched Death Eaters advancing to them.
Harry brought their entwined hands to his lips, kissing the back of Ron's hand and smiled softly. "Always, Ron… always"
At that time, a blinding light shot out between them and the Death Eaters and they felt something cold touched their necks. Before either of them could say anything, they felt a sucking feeling and their body were lifted up.
Then, both Harry and Ron passed out.
"You're awake, Ron?" He could hear a voice from far, pulling him closer to the surface of consciousness. "…Ron…?"
It was a laborious task just to open his eyes and when the pair of blue eyes peaked out from the heavy lids, his world blurred before coming into focus. And the first thing he saw was Harry's worried face looking down at him.
"Yeah…" His voice was husky. "…What happened…?"
Harry took his own sweet time answering his question as the darker man looked down at him, eyes were intensely watching the redhead. Cuts and bruises were there and Ron's face was too pale for his liking. Even when he was told the paleness was due to overexertion in magical usage, it didn't soothe Harry very much. Not to mention that he woke up much, much earlier than Ron.
Ron frowned at Harry's expression. "Help me up…"
"Perhaps I should call someone…" Harry said instead.
"Harry, I'm fine. I'm not feeling nauseous. I'm not suffering any pain. I'm just tired and that is very much expected from someone who was using his magic like there is no tomorrow," Ron said firmly, though a part of him didn't want to be left alone. Embarrassing really, for a 23 year old man, who knew defensive and protection spells more than anyone else to be afraid of being left alone.
But he just did. And he was so glad to see Harry when he opened his eyes after the near-death experience like that.
Harry quirked a smile and he helped his friend to lean heavily against the pillows.
"So, what happened?" Ron asked as his hand instinctively reached up to smooth the tangles in his long red hair.
Harry watched the vibrant hair fall onto Ron's pale face, thinking how strikingly they contrasted. "Oliver and Seamus came to our rescue using portkey when the Order realized the inconsistency in the mission."
Ron raised his eyebrow in disbelief. "It took them two damnable days to find the inconsistency!"
Harry laughed. "At least they did find it and did come to our rescue on time."
Ron huffed as he said sarcastically "Yeah, their timing was so perfect."
"At least they didn't stay and continue the futile fight, like the Order usually to do." Harry remarked. "They just came to put another portkey, a necklace, on each of us and that was why we are here."
"Oh, so that was why I felt something cold before I passed out." Ron said thoughtfully.
Then, Harry's expression turned fierce that Ron's eyes went a little bit wide. "They should have never used portkey on you. You were completely drained out. It could be fatal!"
Sometimes, it was an expression like this and a moment like that that made all the heartache and pain worth it. And Ron knew he lived on the moments like these. Smiling, Ron joked, "Come one, Harry. Either way, we'd still be dead. I'd rather died at home rather than that awfully stinking place like that."
Harry grinned. Leaning forward, he touched Ron's hand – the same hand that he reached out at the time he thought they were going to die. "You've always know what to say."
Ron swallowed hardly.
They nearly died back there and Ron had been so ready, so willing to die. But back then, Harry did many unexpected things, said misleading words and left Ron so high with emotions that he thought he was numbed of. Harry had shown enough anger to kill a Death Eater for Crucio-ing him. They had shared embraces and the embraces were never like the usual hugs they had before. Ron had felt the fire in Harry's arms and saw the intensity in Harry's looks.
And then, they met Death Eaters and death looked at them in the eyes. Ron had reached out for Harry's hand and felt Harry's hand gripped his so tight. Ron couldn't be sure but there was a line that had been crossed during the mission. Something had changed. Ron felt it.
Harry felt it too, Ron thought.
Ron knew that because right now Harry was leaning close to him and was holding his hand. There was something in Harry's eyes that showed new-found emotions and Ron felt his heart hurt so bad; he was suffocating and breaking at the soaring hopes.
Harry kept looking at Ron's face. It was the face that he had known so well. Harry could tell each scar from what battle, touch each freckle without looking and trace each line for every expression. He could describe each moment that changes Ron's boyish look into more mature and more beautiful.
And Harry had always loved him. It was only now he realized just what kind of love he had always harbored to Ron.
It was that kind of love.
It was all consuming, heart-breaking and a-lifetime-bliss love.
Looking back, Harry wondered how he managed to be with Ron for nearly twelve years without loving Ron right…
"Move aside…"Harry whispered.
"You are taking my space," Without waiting for Ron to move, Harry climbed on the bed. He reached for the frozen redhead and contented his heart when Ron's head rolled toward him and rested against the contour of his neck. They sat like that for a few minutes.
For Ron, he didn't know why Harry's acts brought such a surprise; he had after all felt something different and saw the unknown emotions in Harry's eyes. But for a heart that had been longing for Harry's love for as long as it had, Harry's slightest affection made it ached and hurt. It was reflexes that Ron had built from years of unrequited love.
Ron couldn't help it; no more than he could help his heart from falling deeper in love. He couldn't afford being hurt more than he was now. His bravery and courage were failing him and just one more hurt… just a little more …
"Harry…? What's changing…?" Ron asked softly.
Harry closed his eyes at Ron's words. "I am."
"I changed, Ron. I watched you fought against Death Eaters so bravely… so generously… so…" Harry looked down at Ron's uplifted face and his bright green eyes turned dark with so much passion. "…so beautifully… and something awakened in me…"
"What are you saying?" Ron asked quietly, afraid of Harry's answer. He could feel his heart braced itself from anything.
"A revelation if you want to call it." Harry continued and his hand released Ron's clammy hand, raising it to Ron's jaws. Harry's fingertips traced a small, almost invisible scar on Ron's jaw, remembering exactly which battle caused it.
"I always have known that you are important to me. But I almost lost you yesterday; it was then, I realized just where you are in my life… Ron…" Harry's voiced dropped a notch, desperation, love and everything between them filled in his words. "You are… you… you are above me. You are more important than me. I said before that I don't know what I'd do without you. Now I do… I'd be so lost… No one would find me because I'd follow you…"
The blue eyes widened and Ron's heart expanded so fast that it had almost hurt. Blood rushed into his pale face and Ron had to grab Harry's front shirt for support. He braced himself for the next words that surely would come.
"…Ron, I love you…"
Those were the same words Ron had heard Harry said to him for so many times. It was the same 'I love you' but Harry had said it differently this time. The last time Harry said it, the words rolled out with affection and gratitude but now, Ron could almost taste the passion… the depth… the love…
Please, please don't let it be just another dream… Ron prayed fervently. Tears filled the blue eyes and Ron could not, even if he wanted to, close his eyes to stop them from falling. Love was written all over Harry's face and he couldn't deny his heart at such sight.
Even if it is… don't ever let me wake up…
"Ron…?" Harry whispered worriedly. Could he misread the love he saw in Ron? Could he misunderstand the sacrifice he saw in Ron?
Ron breathed in the sound of his name being called. As the tears slid down his cheeks, his heart finally let go the initial panic and disbelief. His heart began to feel the joy and thankfulness for finally giving him a chance to really, really love Harry.
He had loved Harry for as long as he did. And he would go on love Harry, giving and sharing everything he had.
Thank you… Thank you so much… Ron closed his eyes as such happiness clawed his throat. Tears kept falling down, washing away all the previous hurt and pain. …Thank you for Harry's love… thank you for this chance… thank you…
"Ron…" Harry began helplessly. "I'm sorry… I'd never…"
"Don't be sorry, Harry…" Ron whispered. "…because God knows I have never been sorry…"
"What…?" Such sacred whisper could only be reply with a soft word.
"I have never been sorry for loving you…" Ron raised his arms to slip them around Harry's neck loosely. "No matter how much it had hurt me, drained me in the past… no matter how much it felt like killing me… I had never been sorry…"
Harry's throat caught at the look of Ron's face and Ron's words. Suddenly, he understood. "…god, Ron …how long…?"
"…since I know that I was the thing you would miss the most…"
A pair of strong arms wrapped around Ron and pulled him closed to Harry with such force. "You do know that you are still the person I miss the most… even if I had still go on being a fool and don't love you like I am now, you would still know how important you are to me right?"
Ron rested his temple against Harry's ear, smiling and loving the passion he heard in Harry's voice. "…I know that… I'd always known that… but sometimes, when we are in love, we cannot help feeling that it is not enough…"
"Ron…" Harry uttered his best friend's name worshipfully. "Ron... thank you… thank you for staying with me even when you're hurting. Thank you for waiting for me…"
"No," Ron closed his eyes. "I couldn't leave you even if I could… Because I love you so much and leaving you will only kill me faster…"
"Don't say that…" Harry pulled himself away… "You've found me… we've found each other. Let's not lose that… ever…"
Ron smiled. It was the most beautiful smile Harry had ever seen Ron gave to him. It was not a goofy smile… nor was it a smirk, sneer or grin… Ron smiled like he had found what he had been searching for so long… and perhaps Ron did.
And it was only fitting Harry leaned down to kiss the beautiful smiling lips. Nothing could prepare him the feeling of kissing Ron. It surpassed any kiss he had tasted… and Harry knew it was because no one had ever made him feel the way Ron did.
The kiss went on… Harry pushed Ron down the mattress… Ron tightened his arms in return… Harry deepened the kiss… Ron opened his mouth… every inch of their body touched in the most intimate way… It was wild…then gentle… then rough… then soft… Years of surpassing the love, hiding it behind the wall of friendship, was pouring in the single kiss.
The kiss left them breathless and yet wanting for more. But it didn't matter to them because they had found each other.
They had all the time in the world for love…
A/N: I really adore Harry/Ron. Their friendship and all the hints JKR put in her books are an intriguing aspects to be written. And I am in a firm belief that each love must start with friendship. It is when we know him/her then love can bloom. And I really believe that love is more than just lust. It is about generosity, sacrifice, friendship and much more.
I watched VH1: 40 most awesomely bad love songs. And it pisses me off.
There's one person comment about Michael Bolton's song that sings… 'How can we be lover if we can't be friend…' or something like that. This person says that love needs no friendship… all love need is sex! (That's why the song is such an awesomely bad song - yeah right) Well, that's the gist of it. In fact, all the commentators are all in agreement that love equals to sex (or is it the other way around? Who cares, all we need is sex, sex and sex!) Have we stooped so low that we define human's love to sex like animals?
And when there's a lyric (It's Boys II Men's I'll make love to you) 'I'll hold you through the night…' This guy has a nerve saying that when we finish make love, we would want our own space and "go that side, honey, this my side… and I'm tired" Can you believe it! All they did was spurting bullshit for the whole two hours!
Sorry for the rant. I am angry to hear them degrading human's love into nothing but pure, animal sex…. And I wrote this in response to their ridiculous comments…
Thank you for reading my notes… ( )