A Misfit Christmas
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Red Witch, L1701E, Sunbow Entertainment, Marvel Comics, and others
Author's Note: This fic contains spoilers to a couple of my other fics. Also, since not many people have read the story Titan's Song by Lord Belgarion, here's a bio on our favorite cowboy half-demon:
Real name: Jonothon Hudson
Powers: Mystical control of elements via singing
Biography: Bard, as he prefers to be called, is a former member of the Teen Titans, like his half-sister, Raven. As a result, Bard is half-human, half-demon. He and Raven both are children of the demon Trigon. His powers aren't as strong as Raven's, so he can express emotion more freely than she can. A lot of people jokingly compare him to country music legend Johnny Cash because he is a cowboy that likes to wear black. Usually he ends up playing mediator when Raven and Terra are arguing. He has a girlfriend named Amber, who has not been featured in any of my stories, but has appeared in the story Titan's Song, in which Bard was first introduced.
I think that's enough info, and now…on to the story! Hope you like!
The Misfit Manor, the Pit
The Pit, a secret advanced military base, was the headquarters of the elite military anti-terrorist unit known as GI Joe, as well as their wards, the team of young mutants known as the Misfits. Misfit Manor was where the majority of the Misfit team lived, with a few exceptions. It was also the epicenter of a lot of the insanity in the Pit. And it was insane as usual in the house, with the team having a food fight.
"Attention, all Misfits!" Roadblock, the bald African-American heavy machine gunner yelled out over the ruckus…Not surprisingly, the mutants ignored him, probably because they were too engrossed in the fight.
"Here, allow me." Low Light, the blond red-goggled Joe sniper waved a hand. He took a deep breath. "EVERYONE, LISTEN UP NOW!" He yelled out at the top of his voice. The food fight immediately stopped, and there was a thud of an invisible Xi hitting the ground.
"Thanks." Roadblock muttered. "Okay, for those of you who aren't going anywhere for Christmas, Professor Xavier has invited us over to celebrate the holidays."
"Uhm, Roadblock?" Todd Tolensky, the amphibious mutant codenamed Toad, raised his hand. "Most of us don't really have anywhere else to go."
"Oh, right." Roadblock nodded.
"Christmas with the X-Geeks. Oh, joy." Pietro Maximoff, the silver haired speedster codenamed Quicksilver, drawled sarcastically. "That'll be a whole load of fun."
"Oh, grow up!" Wanda Maximoff, the hexcaster codenamed Scarlet Witch, snapped as she smacked her twin brother upside the head.
"Ow!" Pietro exclaimed, holding his head. "That really hurt!"
"Knock it off, you two." Roadblock ordered. "Now there a few rules we have to abide if we want the party to stay alive."
"Yeah." Low Light agreed. "Rule number one: Rapture, I know those friends of yours and their kid are in town. I know you'll want to bring that vampire you date as well. They can come, but tell them to behave themselves this time. And make sure Saya behaves herself also."
"Yes, sir. I'll make sure of it." Rapture nodded.
"Rule number two: Raven, no séances this time! We do not want a repeat of Thanksgiving when you summoned Elvis."
"Oh, dear God…" Lance Alvers, the geokinetic codenamed Avalanche, groaned. "Now that was a screwed-up holiday."
"I thought it was kind of cool." Lila Cheney, the interstellar teleporter codenamed Starway, shrugged. "I never thought I'd get to meet Elvis himself."
"I only did it because my Yu-Gi-Oh cards were confiscated." Raven, the empathic ex-Titan, muttered in her own defense.
"You kept bringing the monsters to life the last time you were hopped up on BA's coffee!" Terra, another ex-Teen Titan with geokinetic powers, grunted while crossing her arms.
"And whose fault was it that my tea was switched with it?" Raven growled at Terra.
"Pietro offered me money!" Terra scowled.
"Oh, no! Don't drag me into this!" Pietro snapped.
The Xavier Institute
A little while later, the group arrived at the X-Mansion. The team was standing in front of the front gate.
"Why am I here?" Saya muttered at Rapture. "I mean, I like spending time with you and all, but I feel old here."
"You didn't have anywhere else to go for Christmas." Rapture pointed out with a smirk. Saya sighed.
"…I hate it when you're right sometimes." Saya grumbled, making Rapture laugh.
"Are we still even allowed here?" Michiru, a Japanese girl with sea green hair, inquired. "They weren't exactly happy when they caught me and Haruka in the closet."
"Relax." Terra reassured. "We have people doing that all the time. Usually, it's either Todd and Althea, or Aja and that Phillips guy. And I'm sure the X-Men have had their share of catching Logan and Jinx in the closet."
"One time they caught Bard and his girlfriend in there, too." Lila snickered.
"Oh, very funny." Bard grunted. They noticed the young brown-haired New Mutant codenamed Multiple walk up to the front gate.
"Hi!" Jamie greeted sweetly with a wave.
"Aw, he looks so cute with a Santa hat." Aja whispered to Lila. Jamie didn't hear the compliment.
"Come on in." The multiplier opened the gate for them. Aja patted Jamie's head. "Ha ha." The group started walking towards the Mansion.
"So who's here?" Raven asked the multiplier.
"Well, so far…" Jamie started counting on his fingers. "Rose, Kitty, Jean and Scott are gone. Oh, and Sam, Tabitha and Megan. They're all with family and stuff."
"Awk! No party with the ponies." Polly squawked sadly as the green parrot flew by.
"I take it that Polly misses his drinking buddies." Lance grunted. "And if Kitty's gone, then that means she probably took her dragon with her." I wish she could be able to take that stupid Coyote with her.
"Oh, I hope we have fun tonight." Angelica Jones, the microwave-generating mutant codenamed Firestar, grinned happily. Some time later…
"Blast it, Terra! I'm telling you, the Crow is better than Friday the 13th!" Raven growled.
"Oh, whoopee." Terra rolled her eyes, sarcasm evident in her voice. "A guy that comes back from the dead seeking revenge. Oh, how scary and original."
"Hey, it's better than a homicidal maniac finding creative ways to dismember the living! And the worst part is, he's the only homicidal maniac who actually has a reason for doing it!"
"Is not!" Terra snapped.
"Is too!" Raven snapped back.
"Is not!" Terra shoved Raven.
"Is too!" Raven shoved Terra back.
"Knock it off, you two!" Althea ordered, separating them. She then felt the ground shake, which was accentuated by yelling. And she noticed a wild cherry red car race by outside, dragging a screaming Cyclops beside it. "Great. What else can happen?" Just then, a portal opened up, and a blonde-haired teenage girl stepped through it.
"Greetings, mortals!" Illyana Rasputin greeted as she stepped into the living room. The younger sister of Colossus then noticed Raven and Bard. "And half-breeds! Happy Holidays from Limbo." As the portal closed, one could hear a drunken reverie, including a belching contest.
"Hello again." Raven groaned.
"You two…know each other?" Wanda asked, pointing at Raven and Illyana.
"I met her when I was coming to Earth from Azarath the first time." Raven explained. "I kind of got stuck in between, and ended up in limbo. I ended up causing some trouble."
"I'll say." Illyana snickered. "You sent Belasco running for the hills!" She burst out laughing. "He came back a few days later."
"Sue me, Illyana." Raven groused, crossing her arms. "He got on my nerves. I warned him not to push me too far."
"I wasn't exactly complaining." Illyana smirked.
"Hi guys!" Rose Wilson waved in greeting as she came into the Mansion with her brother Joey. Joey was a blond boy with curly hair in a small afro-like style and mutton chops. "Things got crazy at home. Mind if we hang out here?"
"Why not?" Logan muttered. "We have enough weirdoes here."
"Hey! I said I was sorry for getting into that fight with Beast." Setsuna, a woman with long green hair, groaned.
"I still don't believe you were around during the 1700s." Beast grumbled with crossed arms as Haruka (A tomboyish woman with short blonde hair), Michiru, and Hotaru (a black-haired girl) started laughing. "What? What did I say?"
"Nothing" Hotaru snickered. "Inside joke."
"You know Rapture, I can never figure your friends out." Lance groaned.
"Don't bother trying, Avalanche." Rapture told the rocktumbler. A woman appeared in the room in a flash of light. She was dressed in white robes, and had long purple hair. She also had a resemblance to Raven.
"Excuse me…" Arella Roth piped up. "…Is Raven here?" Raven turned and smiled.
"Hello, mother." The empath greeted in her trademark deadpan voice. Arella smiled at her daughter.
"Hello Raven, Jonothon. It's nice to see you all again. I wish I could have been there when I found out about the Titans."
"There was nothing you could've done." Bard shook his head. "And Arella, can you please just call me Bard?"
"Sorry, force of habit." Arella apologized. "I also brought someone that wanted to see you. I ran into her on the way here." Another figure appeared in a flash of light. It was a tall girl with red hair and orange skin, dressed in a purple top, miniskirt, and boots, with silver fingerless gauntlets, and bands around her upper arms.
"Hello, friends!" Starfire, the Tamaranian princess born Koriand'r, greeted happily as she started hugging all three of her fellow ex-Titans at the same time "It's joyous to see you all again!"
"We're glad to see you too, Star." Bard wheezed.
"Um…we kind of need to breathe." Terra gasped.
"Oh sorry, friend Terra." Starfire released her friends. "I kind of forget my own strength at times."
"No problem." Terra wheezed. "It's great to see you again."
"So…" Starfire started to ask. "How is it living with the Misfits?"
"DIE, YOU LITTLE PUNK!" Rose screamed as she chased after Pietro.
"Very interesting…and never dull." Raven muttered dryly.
"Hey, we are missing people." Storm noticed. She then turned to the other teachers. "Has any one seen Rapture, Saya, or Haruka and Michiru?"
"Oh, I think I have an idea where two of them are." Hotaru groaned as a disturbance was heard in the closet.
"Gah!" A certain winged man's voice yelled out.
"Hey do you mind?" Rapture grumbled as she and Saya came out of the closet.
"You know, I'm tired of opening this closet and finding people making out in it." Warren groaned. "If you two are here than where's the other two?"
"Geez! Get a room!" Logan groaned loudly. "They're in the laundry room."
"How do you know?" Ororo blinked.
"Because Jinx and I tried to go in there after Fang and Sorceress here commandeered the closet."
"Sorry." Michiru apologized sheepishly as she and Haruka walked by, blushes on their faces. "We kind of got carried away."
"Okay, it's carol time!" Jubilee exclaimed happily, clapping her hands.
"Logan, I thought you hid the song books." Hank shot a look at the feral.
"I did, Beast." Logan grunted.
"Well, she found them." Warren pointed out. "Well, actually…X-23 found them."
"Okay, first up is 'Jingle Bells'." Jubilee started waving her hands at the New Mutants and some of the Misfits like a composer. The group had started singing in their own... unique way.
"Jingle Bells, Trigon Smells, Sladey laid an egg, the X-Mobile lost a wheel, and we all got away, hey!"
"Very funny Raven, Bard and Rose." Jubilee sighed.
"We aim to please." The assassin's daughter and two half-demons joked. A little while later, the group was busy chatting and enjoying the party.
"Thank you for the new cloak, Mother." Raven smiled as she pulled out a dark blue cloak from a wrapped-up box Arella gave her.
"It was no trouble. I knew you would be very pleased with it." Arella smiled back at her daughter. "I hope your brother liked the hat."
"I do." Bard grinned, trying on his new hat. "How did you know black was my favorite color?"
"Family trait." Arella and Raven answered at the same time.
"I'm sorry Bard and I don't have any presents for you, Mother." Raven apologized. "Bard and I had no idea you were even still alive."
"It's alright." Arella hugged Raven. "I already have what I wanted for Christmas." Raven blushed.
"So…having fun?" Raven asked.
"Yes…except for that sailor." Arella sighed, pointing at Shipwreck. "Is he always like this?"
"Unfortunately." Raven sighed.
"You should see him when he's drunk." Bard groaned.
"So, what's your sign?" Shipwreck grinned as he tried to flirt with Arella.
"I got a sign for you, Pops." Althea quipped, crossing her arms, and dragging Shipwreck away. "Do not cross."
"Ha ha, very funny!" Shipwreck complimented sarcastically.
"Well, we are making it through another holiday with the usual insanity." Professor Xavier sighed as he and Logan hid in Xavier's office, knocking back brandy.
"God, Haruka!" Michiru yelled as she dragged Haruka away by the ear. "You just can't stay out of trouble, can you?"
"Will you two get out of the closet already?" The voice of Warren yelled out.
"Why?" The voice of Saya answered.
"I'm tired of walking in on couples in here when I'm hanging the coats everyone leaves everywhere!"
"Die, you loon!" Arella screamed as she and Storm chased after Shipwreck.
"Leave some for me!" Storm added loudly as she pitched ball lightning
"Crazy relationships…" Xavier sighed.
"Well that answers where Raven got the temper from." Bard commented, right before Raven started hitting him. "Ow! Raven! I said I was sorry about the diary!"
"I'll give you sorry!" Raven growled.
"What do you mean I don't act my age?" Terra yelled as she argued with Lance while Pietro was getting strangled by Wanda
"Siblings fighting…" Xavier knocked back a shot of brandy.
"I tell you the renaissance lasted longer, you blue-furred oaf!" Setsuna argued, shoving Beast.
"Where's your proof?" Beast demanded, shoving the green-haired girl back lightly.
"Rose, do you have any threes?" Hotaru asked as she and Rose sat at a table playing cards.
"Go fish." Rose nodded.
"…and some I don't know what to classify as with this bunch." Xavier sighed.
"Look on the bright side, Chuck." Logan shrugged. "364 days till the next Christmas."
"Logan, do me a favor." Xavier groaned. "Don't remind me."