Disclaimer: I do not own FF, yada yada yada...Just the plot. If you want to give me Reno though, my birthday is coming up!
Summary: I, Yuffie Kisargri WILL learn how to drive, i I have to learn how to from that stupid Turk, Reno.
Notes: The first few paragraphs are just a summary of what happened, so nothing new there besides some thoughts here and there.
Driver's Ed Chapter 1
From the Diary for Yuffie K.
I, Yuffie Kisagari, a ninja, the heir to the throne of Wutai, a materia hunter/thief AVALANCHE member, THE MOST BEAUTIFUL girl anyone has EVER set eyes upon, and a multi talented teenager can not drive. Yesh, I know, I helped saved the world, right? At sixteen too! I mean c'mon! A lot of people can't brag about saving the world at sixteen! I mean, I've done lots of major accomplishments in my seventeen years so far! Yet. I. Can't. Drive. Let me allow some useless background information...
It all started one day, when I was trying to save Wutai. I then ran into the group by the name of AVALANCHE, and boy, I totally thought they where losers. For crying out loud! There was a guy with too spiky hair and huge butcher knife, two girls that where way too cheerful and optimistic for their own good that where BOTH flirting with the spiky haired dude. Seriously, what does everyone like him? I mean based on history, I'd say Tifa had a better chance, but Aeries and Cloud where moving too fast, ya know? But whatever, Tifa likes Cloud and I have a feeling he likes her too, so why don't' they, oh I dunno...GET TOGETHER since Aeries died! Gosh, are they stupid or something? I, of course, would've of course, gone for it! Duh! Cloud. Seriously. Get over it. It's not your fault your girlfriend who thought you where completely her ex boyfriend died. If Tifa doesn't' go for you, I sure will. I was the only one that got to kiss Cloud anyways on that Golden Saucer date!
Then later there was a talking cat riding on a Mog, and let me tell you, his singing SUCKED. Even I could do a better job! And that's saying something! He was also founded out to be created by Reeve, who I seriously think was drunk when he created that annoying thing... The mog can seriously pack a tackle/punch too when you're in it's way. As if the cat wasn't weird enough, there was cat/lion looking thing with a tail that could probably extinguish your hair or something; that almost happened to me a few times actually...it was horrible, but he's so FLUFFY AND CUTE! Then there's a guy with one gun arm that was unstable, according to the talking cat...He's crazy and unstable for sure.
Vincent Valentine, or "Vinnie" as I like to call him is a rather fun to annoy more than anyone else, 'cause he would not kick your ass or anything no matter how bad the taunting got. He is a bit quiet and stuff though, I mean we found the guy in a COFFIN babbling about sinning, it left me cracking up though... He should also get over that Lucrendra chick, she's probably dead anyways. I REALLY hate his shoes and gauntlet, they're' scary and I have to take Vinnie shoe shopping sometime. And lastly there is a ex-space captain, Cid, who is a rather bad mouth and influence, Cloud had actually COVERED MY EARS one time while Cid was cussing up a storm. I mean no one treats me like my age! Cid makes an interesting leader, not to mention he runs kind of funny...
Originally, someone as cool and talented as me wouldn't join them, but they had LOADS of Materia! So what the heck? Why not join them then steal their Materia? Well yeah, that's what I did! AND they forgave me at the end too! Sure, they got pissed and stuff, but they REALLY REALLY care about me and went after me when I got kidnapped! They said it was for the Materia, but I don't think so! nuh uh! Although, Cloud didn't sign that Materia contract...Darn it! Me being the sneaky ninja I am, I did manage to steal a few...
Ok, so what does that have to do with driving you may ask? A lot.
When I first met Cloud, they where walking and of course, me, being me, I tried to steal their Materia. Yes, I admit it, I'm a Materia addict. I just LOVE them! But that's besides
the point. Later however, they got a Buggy, which I did ok in I suppose. Later we got onto a ship in Junon to go to Costa Del Sol, Cloud was nice enough to give me a tranquillizer, same thing happened with the Highwind and Tiny Bronco. I think moving machines hate me...Then later where was the submarine and Highwind...totally made me feel sick...Yes, I have motion sickness.
Of course, Cloud told me to be nervous and just ignore it. Haha. Yeah, being nervous just makes it worse. And it's kind of hard to be preoccupied by something when you're too focused on whether or not you're going to throw up and 'Captain' Cid may start a line of complaints, yells, and never-ending torment on how you ruined his airship. So of course, Tranquilizers would then come in handy! But only for a short while...
One time, I begged Cloud and made him sign a contract saying that he'll teach me how to drive. It started really really well in the beginning, just crashed a few mail boxes here and there, ran over the curb a few times, scared the shit outta Cloud...Yes. It was FUN! But then I got hungry and I guess I stopped by somewhere and had some food. Bad Idea. I ended up throwing up all over Cloud. Yes, I puked on Cloud. It was...awesome.
Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk... I feel like rambling a lot today! Whew! Sorry about that...hey wait! What am I apologizing for? Cloud said that driving will help overcome motion sickness, and that is EXACTLY what I will do! I'm SICK of waiting around until I can drive.
I, Yuffie Kisargi WILL overcome that sickness problem And learn how to drive! And at this point, I seriously don't care who teaches me...
To Be Continued...
Reviews and opinions will be greatly appreciated!