Title: Afraid to Love
Summary: A poem describing how Ennis feels about Jack, including his fears.
"Afraid to Love"
I'm afraid of what I feel
Afraid to admit that this is real
Afraid of letting anyone see
How much a man could mean to me.
I hate to be afraid
Always wishing it was easy
Never wishing we'd never met
Because your touch is my salvation and my death.
I want to stay
But it's a fear too powerful
I want to look away
But you're something too beautiful.
Your eyes are like the stars
Your touch is like the sun
I always want to feel you
But my fear makes my heart come undone.
I keep thinking that it's wrong
I love you, but it's hard to hold on
For you I long when we're apart
Why is it so hard to love with this heart?
I want to run but never leave
I want to forget but never can
And while in my heart you'll always be
I can't seem to give you all I am.
Ignoring the pain makes me forget the world
But I cannot be a fool
This is somewhere I cannot stay
But I always feel its pull.
It's the only place I want to be
But only when I cannot see
This crazy world of people glancing 'cross the street
Peering deep inside me.
I'm safe when I'm not thinking
Because all the people disappear
I hate to think of what they're thinking
Is it all just an irrational fear?
I don't want to run
I don't want to hide
I just want to love you
And be always by your side.
The nights are hard without you
The days are ever long
Each passing happy face reminds me
That I'm not in your arms.
You have to know how much I want you
You have to know how much I care
Please don't doubt that my heart is yours
And forgive me that I can't be there.
Lies have to be told
And truths have to be kept
Feelings have to stay inside
I won't let our secret be our death.