Shoujo-ai, (girl x girl) so if no like, no read – tis as simple as that.

More about it on myDA page. And sorry guys I havn't updated any of my other fics -hides with guilt-

Disclaimer: I don't own Teentitans, its characters or anything. Also 'my cuts are healing, learning to love' is taken from I Caught Fire by The Used, and 'looking for a reason to believe' or something similar is from Jessica Riddle.


The blade was cool against her pale skin, but Raven was careful not to let it pierce through.

"My cuts… are healing…" she whispered to herself, "learning to love…"

It had been a month since she'd confessed her feelings to Starfire, and finally had some insight back from the other alien. But Raven was confused, and tired. Tired of thinking, of hurting, of loving, of living.

Because loving means hurting, and living means thinking.

She wasn't sure what to do, what to feel. She didn't know if she was happy, though she believed she ought to be. Robin was happy for her, so was Cyborg. Of course, Beastboy didn't know yet.

But Raven was still uncertain. And she still wondered if there was any point being together with Star…

"Raaaven! Where are you? Someone's here to seeeee you!" There was a certain high tone to Cyborg's voice that made Raven grimace. He just couldn't help teasing her at every opportunity.

Footsteps pounded up the stairs. Raven swiftly tucked her pocket-knife away under her cape, but not before glancing at her own reflection in the shining metal.

An unrevealing face looked back up at her. Not a trace of what she felt showed through this mask.

"Rae!" a delighted squeal met Raven in the corridor. She bit her lip, looking briefly towards the grinning red-head. She's as beautiful as ever, she thought, turning away. Maybe it was from not having seen Star for some time. Maybe not.

Starefire linked arms with Raven, pulling her away from an interested Cyborg and blinking Robin and making their way outside to the rooftop.

The two sat side by side, under a blanket of darkness. A sliver of a crescent moon high above watched over them.

"Look at all the pretty Christmas lights," Starfire observed, gesturing out towards the town where a scattering of colored lights illuminated the small city.

Raven just looked up, staring nostalgically at the numerous twinkling stars that were likes jewels upon the dark velvet sky. "I think… these 'lights' are much prettier… Not as many colors, but more meaning and wonder to them."

"That is true, my friend," Star smiled, lifting her gaze up too.

"But," Raven turned to fix her eyes upon the girl, "the prettiest, the most beautiful, is the Star sitting next to me."

Starfire looked at Raven, blinking. She blushed slightly, laughing modestly. "Oh, that is not so! I am not worthy to be called beautiful in your presence."

This was Raven's turn to blush. She hung her head, falling silent.

"But that is not what is on your mind… you are sad, are you not?"

Raven refused to look at Starfire. Too many thoughts were racing through her mind, so many unanswered questions left hanging. But she would not – could not – reveal these to one she loved. She could not burden the other, and anyway she knew she should not be doubting Starfire.

"I… it's nothing."

"It can not be nothing if it troubles you so."

The two sat in an awkward silence.

I'm just looking for a reason to believe… Raven tried to tell herself. A reason to believe in this – in her.

Star suddenly turned, lifting Raven's head with a hand. Green and purple orbs locked, and for just a moment, each saw something behind the other's eyes, a deep emotion that reached out for…

Before Raven could pull away, Starfire kissed her.

Their lips met in a gentle embrace. There was no urgency, no lust. Only a soft radiance of warmth, shared in this magical moment of bonding.

All of a sudden, the sky lit up in an array of dazzling colors.

The two stopped, turning to the fireworks that showered above them. Raven smiled, genuinely, leaning against her lover.

"Happy New Year, Star," she whispered, "I love you."

Starfire clasped her hands with Raven's, planting a kiss on the girl's head.

"Happy New Year. I… Love you too, Rae." The sincerity and feeling in her words were not lost on the other girl.

"I know," Raven said in a barely audible voice, more to herself than in reply, "I know now."

The two sat together, not speaking a word.

Here, now, in this silence, this mutual understanding, Raven and Starfire were closer than they had ever been before.

For they shared something beautiful…

And it was called Love.