Almost Sucks
by Mashiro

Naruto fandom, series, no spoilers
AU, BOYS LOVE: Naruto x Sasuke, Kakashi x Iruka, Lee x Gaara

first time: July 27th 2008, Sunday
second time: February 15th 2009, Sunday

The End


And here is the end. This has been an absolutely amazing project to work on. The characters have been wonderful, you readers have been amazingly supportive and I have learned so much about the writing process. It's been three years, one month and ten days since I started this. Wow.

To the characters, thank you! It's been such an amazing privilege, getting to work with you and scribbling down this story. You've taught me so much. I wouldn't trade these years with you for anything.

To the readers, thank you so much for reading, and to you guys reviewing, thank you so much for letting me know what you think. I am very grateful to all of you. I'm sorry for taking so long, but I hope that you have enjoyed reading this piece of fan fiction as much as I have enjoyed writing it. I will miss you guys so much!

This is the end of the story. There could be some oneshots in the future as I still have some things I would like to deal with in the Almost Sucks universe, possibly even a sequel, but they will be posted separately.

Take good care of yourselves and have lots of fun! I hope you will enjoy the last epilogue.



DISCLAIMER: I don't own the rights to the Naruto series or characters and I make no money writing this. I'm just a fan. This is fan fiction.


77: Sunday morning


That New Years had been even more fun. The food had been tastier, the fireworks bigger and the company improved beyond words. Last year's company hadn't been bad, it was just that the two extra guests (one of them especially) had made this year's company so incredibly good. Kakashi and Gai had spent the evening competing in strange little games and Sasuke had ignored Gaara's attempts to bother him but not Gaara's siblings' attempts to get to know him. He had been a bit stiff and uncomfortable, but not rude. He had not wanted to kiss Naruto in public to greet the new year, but he had made up for it later.

It was a good thing though, in a way, that they hadn't kissed in public. Naruto hadn't been able to focus on Sasuke's mouth without recalling the feel of those amazing lips wrapped around him that morning and he did not want to the consequences of recalling that if they weren't alone. Oh, and that was another reason why this New Years had been so superior to last year's. What could beat having your boyfriend wake you up after one month of sex ban and give you your very first blowjob ever? And it hadn't just been the blowjob (though it would have certainly been enough), it had also been the fact that Sasuke had taken the time and effort to borrow the book, study and get up before ten just because he had wanted to do something for Naruto.

'I wish we'll be together forever,' Naruto had closed his eyes and whispered his New Year's wish, hoping that the ones in charge of this year's New Year's wishes were as efficient as the ones in charge of last year's had been.


Naruto liked being on the bottom. He hadn't thought he would dislike it, but he liked it more than he had expected to. It wasn't just that it felt good; it felt good, really good sometimes, but that wasn't the biggest nice thing.

The biggest nice thing was that for some reason, even though it was horribly silly that it should make a difference, when Sasuke was on top it felt like he really, really cared about Naruto. When he was nestled between Naruto's legs and his hips were pressed close, close to Naruto's hips, somehow Sasuke's arms and his hands wrapped around and running over Naruto's body felt ten times warmer and ten times more real. He was in charge of things; he was doing where usually he responded to what Naruto did. It shouldn't have made a difference, but it did.

Maybe it could have been their first time that had nagged in Naruto's brain, but one part of him had felt like when he had been on top, Sasuke could have just gone along with it without really wanting too; because Naruto wanted to, because he didn't want to seem boring, or whatever. They had talked about it and Sasuke had said it was bullshit, but the thought had kept nagging. And then when Sasuke was on top it was like he said that he wanted to, really.

The first time they had gone all the way after the sex ban had been Naruto's first time on the bottom. Sasuke had been so careful, so gentle and so caring. His eyes had been filled with nervousness and worry even though he had tried to act all confident and educated. When it was done, Sasuke going soft inside his body, Naruto had started crying and it had been impossible to stop.

Sasuke had half-panicked while trying to seem like he wasn't half-panicking and it had been so endearing that the crying had only gotten worse. His demand for an explanation and refusal to accept Naruto's 'it's fine, I'm happy!' almost incoherent because of all the sniffling and tears and running snot, had had the same effect. Turning the relief and the stupid worry that wasn't supposed to have even really been there into words just made it all the more tangible and overwhelming.

While thinking about Sasuke's reactions to his first time on the bottom had done nothing to stop the tears either (the opposite rather), it had helped to make Naruto feel less like a seriously overreacting girl.

The day after Naruto had felt like he'd been run over by two trucks one carrying physical and the other emotional exhaustion and he had almost scared Iruka with his lethargy. Sasuke had been slightly more careful around him; not so much that everyone else noticed, but enough that Naruto did and that was enough for his eyes to tear up again. Sasuke had been flustered and snarled 'stop that!' and Naruto had sniffled and whined 'I know! I just...!'

It had taken time and convincing before Sasuke let Naruto bottom again, but being on top was great too.


Naruto had always heard people talk about spring being the time of love, but once the turbulent beginning of it had passed, starting with Sasuke's New Year's surprise, winter had been sizzling. Every opportunity had been used to make up for their month away from each other and Naruto's creativity had been thrilled by the hunt for new places and ways to explore their sexuality in. He was sure that was the reason why this winter, once it had gotten cold, had turned out to be one of the coldest in years. Nature had to protect itself somehow, right?

Sasuke had kicked Naruto when he shared that theory on one Wednesday evening in mid February. Iruka had had a meeting with the parents of the students in his class and Kakashi had conveniently realized it was perfect star gazing weather (Naruto had learned to appreciate the man's perverted and accepting mind and ignore the comments afterwards). They had been sprawled on the kitchen floor in Naruto's house next to the stove, panting and half-naked (keeping some clothes on was both exciting and convenient), still grounded from each other's rooms.

'The eco system is really good at balancing things,' Naruto had said and grinned, tracing spirals on Sasuke's stomach with the leftover pleasure on his fingers.

'You think you're horny enough to affect the weather?' Sasuke had raised a brow.

'You think your needy moans during sex aren't sexy enough to...' Naruto had been cut of by his own yelp as Sasuke's heel came flying.

'My moans are not needy,' Sasuke had grumbled, cheeks red.

'Sure they are,' Naruto had been stubborn.

Before Sasuke had a chance to protest again they had both panicked as a car pulled up on the driveway. Yes, they were allowed to have sex now, but that didn't mean they wanted to be caught doing it, or afterglowing. An incredible amount of excellent teamwork had had them both dressed and decent and the floor and nearby furniture spotless when Iruka came in, arms wrapped around groceries, apologizing for being late ('I stopped by the store to get some things'). Naruto had had nightmares after that about the man coming home ten or fifteen minutes earlier and them being so absorbed in their activities that they didn't hear a thing.


They had moved in March. The mother of one of Iruka's co-workers had had enough of the town life and decided to move to the city and sell her house. It lay on the edge of a residential area on the other side of town and was much bigger than the houses they had lived in before, with a big yard and the forest that Lee and Naruto had played in when they were kids right behind it. It was closer to Sasuke and Naruto's school, to Iruka's school, to Lee's house, to Gaara's apartment and, despite its seemingly more secluded location, closer to the town center and bus station. Kakashi's school was a bit further away, unfortunately, but he had said he was fine with it.

It had been sad to leave the house he had grown up and created memories in, but Naruto liked the new house too. It was easier to get to everyone from there and they didn't have to take the bus to school every day. The forest was really close and that was good. Iruka liked picking mushrooms and berries when it was the season for that. It was bigger too, the new house. There were four of them now and bigger families needed bigger houses. For example, the second bathroom in the new house had a shower, making it much more useful in the mornings. In both Naruto and Sasuke's old houses the second bathroom had only had a toilet.

Naruto had also eventually grudgingly agreed that there might be good things about him and Sasuke not sharing a room with a double bed, even if they were very, very few. They were pretty different when it came to how they wanted their rooms, after all. Naruto liked his relaxed and natural (no, a few shirts and boxers on the floor did not make a room messy) and Sasuke was more like Iruka. Besides, having his boyfriend one corridor away was still a huge improvement from before. 'Think of it as anticipation building,' Kakashi had said, smiling, earning a glare from Sasuke and a slap on the arm from Iruka.

One of the first things they had done when they had moved in was repaint the walls, ceiling and floor in Naruto and Sasuke's rooms. The old wallpaper had been really boring and worn. It had been great, picking colors, and Naruto had gone for a bold three walls orange and one blue (Iruka had agreed only when Naruto agreed to let the ceiling and floor be white). Sasuke had chosen colors similar to what had been in his old room. They had also built a new CD bookcase in Sasuke's room. He had been upset enough about leaving behind the one in his old room to actually voice his displeasure. 'Can't we take it apart and put it back together again there?' he had asked, forehead wrinkled in angry frustration. Iruka had said it would be much easier to just build a new one and once the idea was there, he had been excited about the opportunity to dust off his tools and see if his skills were still intact. Apparently (Naruto had been as surprised as Sasuke and Kakashi) Iruka had spent a couple of years as a carpentry apprentice.


It was Sunday, morning, the end of April and the last day of Easter holiday. They sat gathered by the table, Naruto and Sasuke and Iruka and Kakashi. Naruto sat by the window and the sun shone in and warmed his back.

Two toasts shot out of the toaster and landed on the table. Naruto grabbed one of them and Kakashi the other one. Iruka frowned and swept together some crumbs that had strayed in the action. Kakashi had been bored one evening when Iruka was out and tampered with the appliance, giving it extra power as it ejected the finished slices of toast. The first time they used it afterwards Iruka had been so startled that he spilled his morning tea, even luring a smile out of Sasuke. But it had only been funny for about two seconds, until Iruka snapped out of his surprise. Naruto hadn't thought it was possible to scold grown ups, but apparently it was. He had wondered if one day when they were grown up Sasuke would scold him for something funny he had done. It seemed quite likely.

The morning reminded Naruto of the very first time they had sat together around a table, exactly two hundred and sixty five days ago (he had counted the days on a calendar the evening before). That had been a Sunday too, and Sasuke had been surly just like he was now. He ate Iruka's homemade toast slowly and in tiny bites, looking like it was the most awful thing he had eaten. He had different reasons this day though; instead of being upset because he had been forced to move without wanting to, today Sasuke was just upset because it was too early and he had been forced to have breakfast. The scowl would be gone by noon, Naruto was sure of it; especially if Iruka and Kakashi went through with what they were in the middle of planning.

"We could stop by Life on our way there and look at that kitchen table set," Iruka said. "They're open until one today. Are you two sure you don't want to come?"

"We're sure!" Naruto hurried to say. Kakashi and Iruka were going on a daytrip drive to a green house garden because Iruka wanted some inspiration for their backyard. Naruto had liked going on daytrips, as it made the weeks a little less the same all the time, but these days, with a boyfriend around, getting some alone time was much more interesting.

Iruka narrowed his eyes slightly.

"Just... don't get carried away," he mumbled.

Naruto felt his cheeks warm and saw Sasuke straighten and stiffen in his chair, looking even surlier as he blushed too. Kakashi got extra cheerful.

"I... Iruka!" Naruto whined.

"It's just... It's... unhygienic," the man muttered and looked a bit flustered himself.

"Stop!" Naruto demanded, slapping hands over his ears.

It had been the single most embarrassing moment in Naruto's life, even worse than those nightmares he'd had. They had been in the kitchen again and too distracted to hear the car when Iruka came home early from work. The horror had sent Naruto falling off the counter and he had hit his head on the old decorative stove that Iruka loved so much about their new kitchen. Lots of blood, a hundred times more embarrassment and three stitches. In the hospital Iruka had blurted that it was a riding accident, only realizing when he'd already said it what a bad fake accident he had picked. Naruto's ears had been burning, having to answer questions about the nonexistent horse, being told that he shouldn't be afraid to get back up again and 'how refreshing with guys riding!'. Iruka's ears had been burning too. Fortunately Sasuke had been outside in the waiting room. For weeks after that they had been much less adventurous in their experimenting.

"Right," Iruka cleared his throat. "Just... right."

Sasuke slammed his cup of coffee back down on the table, Naruto drank more milk and Kakashi was still smiling.

Sasuke went back to his room right after breakfast and warned Naruto against waking him again before eleven. 'But you get up at ten!' Naruto protested, horrified at the waste of alone time, but Sasuke was unyielding. Unwilling to express the real source of his frustration Naruto grumbled instead over being the only one helping with the dishes; naturally Iruka promising that Sasuke would do his share after dinner didn't help much.

The parents left around ten. Naruto sighed as the door closed and glared in the direction of Sasuke's door. That guy could be such a bore sometimes. Sleep over sex? You'd think he wasn't a sexually active hormonal teenager.

Naruto spent the first ten minutes or so sorting the condoms they had left and agonizing over the fact that they would eventually run out. It was Naruto's turn to buy and shopping for condoms was not fun. Last time, when preparing for their very first time, Naruto had been hiding behind the magazine rack for ages before he dared to make a move, because of all the guys from school. He had run to the counter and panicked after only a few seconds of browsing and grabbed everything he could, losing over a month's allowance in the process. He had known there were a lot of different kinds of condoms but it had never been a problem before. And of course he had ended up with the slow cashier.

It would be easier now, as the combination of experience and Sasuke's sex book studies had made sure that they knew good condoms from bad ones, but it was still embarrassing.

Lube was even more embarrassing but fortunately they didn't have to worry about that for a while. A week before Christmas a truck had arrived at Gaara's apartment and the driver had unloaded a whole crate full of Easy Slide. Apparently Gaara (with the help of Shikamaru's computer wizard friend) had convinced the manufacturers that his apartment was a pharmacy in desperate need of lube. The internet was a truly amazing thing. Gaara had handed out half the crate as Christmas gifts to his friends and his friends' parents (Iruka had been quite speechless) and Sasuke had thrown a fit when he heard that Shikamaru had been given his share too.

'He's not even gay!' he had yelled.

Gaara had frowned and looked surprised.

'You didn't know?'

'He's not!'

It had been messy, but at least they had lube now.

After the condoms had been sorted and he had decided which one they should use once he could wake Sasuke up, Naruto went downstairs and spent twenty minutes with the Playstation. He had planned to spend all remaining forty minutes, but after twenty he gave up because he kept getting his ass kicked because he couldn't concentrate. He kept thinking about Sasuke sleeping in his bed and how adorable he had to look (he always looked adorable when he slept when he was grumpy) and what they could have been doing if the guy had been more of a morning person.

The last thirty minutes Naruto sat on the floor in the hall leaning against Sasuke's door and tried to study for the geography test they had next week; not because he expected to remember anything, he was distracted after all, but because he could tell Iruka he had studied.

At exactly eleven Naruto opened the door to Sasuke's room and quietly snuck inside. Curtains covered the windows and it was dark. The room smelled of Sasuke and Naruto's skin tingled. In the middle of the bed lay a dark comforter larva with a black tousle of hair. Sasuke looked so much younger and more innocent and cuter when only his hair showed, and part of Naruto wanted to just 'aww...' and watch him until he woke up on his own. The rest of Naruto knew what was hiding underneath that thick cover though and knew better than to waste their alone time just watching.

He didn't go for the bed immediately however, he went for the CD bookcase. The third CD from the left in the middle shelf was Sasuke's horny CD. Naruto had thought it was just messy, like all the others, but Sasuke had said one evening that it almost always got him in the mood. Why Sasuke would have hidden such wonderfully useful information for so long, Naruto couldn't understand, but he was glad he knew now. The CD had been so good for helping Sasuke get over the cranky moods he could get into sometimes, that it had turned into Naruto's horny CD too.

He carefully pried open the CD case and turned on the stereo with an elbow. There came a whirr from the machine as it opened and Naruto replaced one of the CDs already in there with the one in his hand. He set the volume on low first, as that was better to wake up to. They could turn it up later. Sasuke kept the remote control close to his bed.

The music started and Naruto undressed as he walked toward the bed; T-shirt, pants, underwear and socks fell to Sasuke's floor. Naruto sat down on the edge, leaned over and brushed the hair away from Sasuke's neck before pressing a kiss to him.

"Hey," he said softly and smiled as the boyfriend groaned, shifted and buried his head deeper in his pillow. "It's eleven."

Naruto let one of his hands trail Sasuke's form through the comforter and nuzzled his nose into the dark hair and inhaled the wonderful smell of him.

"What have you been dreaming?" Naruto asked. "Can I come in?"

Sasuke grunted and shifted an arm around to his back to untuck the edge of the comforter from under him. Naruto was quick to slip under the cover and his eyes fell shut as his naked skin met Sasuke's. He wrapped his arms around Sasuke and moved as close as he could.

"I missed you," he breathed against the beautiful smooth skin that was Sasuke's throat. "I couldn't even concentrate on the Playstation."

A throaty, tired and amused huff came from Sasuke at that and Naruto smiled. His hands wandered over too obvious hipbones, thighs, ribs and stomach, and between-legs. It was hardening, waking up faster than Sasuke did. Naruto hummed the music streaming softly from the speakers.

"Who gets to be on top today?" he asked, nuzzled under Sasuke's hair again and nibbled on his neck. Then he suddenly smiled against the skin as he remembered how breakfast had reminded him of the first time their family of four had been gathered around a table. This mood now was nothing like the mood the first time he and Sasuke had been in the same room together, but Naruto couldn't help but think of it anyway.

"Can I spear you with my robot?" he grinned against Sasuke's neck.

Sasuke's naked body shook as he snorted his laughter into his pillow. A hand reached around, grabbed Naruto by the neck and squeezed hard but soft.

"Oww..." Naruto made a face but he smiled.

"Idiot," Sasuke grumbled his first real word since he had dumped Naruto for more sleep and then turned to show one dark, half-opened eye. Naruto pulled back just enough that he could look at him.

Two hundred and sixty five days.

It felt like no time at all, and like a century. It felt like the most amazing days ever and a miracle and a dream. Two hundred and sixty five days and Sasuke was here.

"So can I?" Naruto let the fingers of one hand trail down Sasuke's spine and the other wrap around his hardening flesh. Sasuke's eyes closed and he pushed back slightly, slightly against Naruto. Naruto tingled too and pushed forward. When Sasuke's eyes opened again they were narrowed, beautiful and finally awake.

He turned around in Naruto's arms; then his hands were on the move. He grabbed Naruto's hip and his neck and invaded his mouth with his tongue. Naruto invaded back. He slipped a leg between Sasuke's and the boyfriend's warm, naked limbs trapped and squeezed it as he thrust his hips forward. The slippery friction between them drew moans from both their throats.

"Sure," Sasuke murmured when their mouths slipped apart.

Naruto smiled and kissed him again.