So, I know I am not supposed to put Author's Notes as chapters, but it doesn't really matter with this story anyways.
I received a review the other day that I felt was all too true to what I believe. My sole decision to re-write this story was based on these faults alone. I know that the author of this review will never see this post, but I felt that it needed to be addressed so that I can clarify my plans for the re-write. You have to keep in mind that I wrote this story while I was in high school and crafted it mostly during class. My writing has improved drastically over the six year period since this story began. Anyways, here is the review that I received.
"Leyla: Thanks for sharing your story, though I don't think I can read any more. Michael and Selene are WAY too off-character, there are too many original characters that no only have too much room for my like, they're constanly surpassing Selene or Michael in one way or another. A classic Mary Sue fanfiction, I'm sorry to say. A pity really, you make an interesting story otherwise, grammatical mistakes notwithstanding (such as "starring" instead of "staring", very often) and the number of unnecesary dialogs. Laconic nature is a trait that both Selene and Michael share, something that's not reflected here, unfortunately."
Normally I would shrug something like this off, but it has been plaguing my thoughts since I received the e-mail while I was at work. I feel the need to address this and further explain my concepts for the re-write. The first point I want to get to is the out of character representations of Selene and Michael. I do admit, that this is entirely true. I did not portray them very well in my original script. Reading back on the story as I am editing and scraping certain parts, I find myself shaking my head and scolding myself repeatedly for it. This is a problem that I have gotten increasingly better at over the years. I also think that now that I have re-watched all three movies and read the books that I have a better grasp of their mannerisms and personalities. I will make an extreme effort to rectify this mistake and I apologize wholeheartedly for it. There is no excuse for this.
On the original character front, I don't think one can have too many. If you stick to just Selene and Michael, it only leaves you with a bare minimum to work with. However, I do agree that my OC's overshadowed the couple. This is also something that I have been working on. I've been finding places to add scenes with private moments between Selene and Michael, interactions with the other characters, or simply just inserting them into a place where they were not before. It seems to be working so far. Although, I do not see how that falls into a Mary Sue. That statement makes no sense to me, but I digress, Selene and Michael will have more standing in this story than they did before. Another issue with my original characters that I realized is that they were not very well developed. They had no past, not much personality and felt very one dimensional. Especially Tynan and Tyris. This is also something I have been working steadily on. I want them to be well-rounded as they both play key roles later on in the two, that's right, TWO sequels. In truth, I had only quickly put together Tyris originally and hadn't made up much of him when I took on this story, and Tynan was added into the mix blindly. My original plan was for him to be the comic relief, and I believe on that aspect, he worked well. Now however, I find that his speech is impossible to work with and I just can't get into his head anymore. There is no excuse for such an offense and I also apologize for that. Regardless, I have grown to love the scruffy werewolf and he WILL remain in the story.
Now on the subject of grammar and spelling, all water under the bridge. Back then, I was too lazy to re-read my work and failed to catch my errors. This was a fault on my part and I intend to pay more attention this time around. I also believe that I was using a program that didn't have a spell checker. But I consider this complaint null and void. It's an easy fix to a superficial problem.
Unnecessary dialogue. Yeah, there was a lot of that. Anything that I find irrelevant, has been either removed or replaced. I have a better handle on speech now that I have matured as an adult. Expect better scripted dialogue from here on out.
Now that I have addressed those issues, it is time to some-what explain my plans. First off, I want to say thank you to all of you that have taken the time to read the story and have taken an interest. It means a lot to me that you're enjoying reading this as much as I enjoy writing it.
On the character front, NO ONE will be removed. I have rolled this around my head for a long time and found it impossible to part with anyone. I have grown way too attached to all of them. Even Viktor haha. He is just too good of a bad guy. Well, except maybe Kahn, because he died and I am quite happy with him staying dead. However, there will be a few new characters. Some with just cameo appearances, and one with an enormous role that had not originally been planned. This is an idea that I am extremely excited about.
Tynan and Tyris' back stories are somewhat explained and you will get more information about them. I think that it's about time if you know what I mean.
The story will be a few chapters longer, and certain events may change or be removed depending on the flow of the story and what I deem absolutely necessary. The addition of new characters also gives me something more to work with and also more back story to explain. Already, it is ahead two extra chapters and I am only editing chapter eight at this point. I still have a long way to go unfortunately for all you guys. Thank you so much for your patience with me! I know I can be such a dive when writing sometimes.
When I reach the end of my re-write, I will be removing this story. I will then re-upload it under the same title and update twice a week until all chapters are back up. To keep up with this, you will either have to check back regularly, send me a message, or add me to your author alert list. Once all the new chapters are posted, I will start posting the second story in the same fashion.
If you have any questions what so ever, do not hesitate to message me. I would love to hear from you guys and get your opinions and maybe fuel your curiosities about the re-write.
Now that was a load off of my mind, and I bid you guys a good day.