Yes, cruddy way to open up my existence on but I've decided that since I've never in my life made a drabble before, I should do a drabble series. I think I can pull off…twenty, twenty-five, maybe? We'll see. The summary said there will be over twenty, did it not? In any case, do enjoy the first of many "Arguing Drabbles". I do not own Naruto. No flames. Good day.

It was a strange outing, running into Ino like that. All Sakura had needed at the supermarket was a few paper towels, some bread (she'd run out that morning and was desperately craving toast), a chicken breast for dinner that night, and some of that raspberry yogurt that she just couldn't get enough of and evidently went through in two days. But there she stood, in the bakery section, a little shopping basket over her arm, suspiciously watching Ino pick out a fresh baguette. It wasn't long before the blonde girl had noticed her.

"Fancy running into you, Forehead Girl," she said, glancing around for only a Sasuke fan girl knew what.

"Sasuke came into this market, didn't he, Ino-pig?" Sakura asked, a might possessively. "That's why you're here. So where is he?"

"Hmph. I was about to ask you the same question."

Sakura scowled. "You think you're hot stuff, don't you? Well, you can't have Sasuke, hear me? So where is he, Ino-pig? I know he's here!"

"Don't you try to act like I followed him in here; and besides, you should back off!"

"No way! Sasuke could never love an ugly, fat thing like you!"

"And Sasuke could never love someone with such an enormous forehead!"

If listening through a stethoscope, one could hear one of Sakura's nerves snapping in half in her brain. A cataclysmic argument erupted in the bakery section, causing several people in the dairy aisle nearby to flee, a couple produce workers to cower behind the lettuce, and a leg of lamb to be dropped unceremoniously out of someone's basket by mistake.

And Sasuke wasn't even in the market at all.

Several shouts of, "Sasuke would think you're ugly!" later, the squabbling females were interrupted by the only person who could ever be loud enough to be able to interrupt them: Naruto Uzumaki.

"Stay out of this Naruto!" Sakura growled. Naruto blinked rather innocently and asked what they were fighting about.

"Maybe I can help resolve it."

"I doubt it!" Ino scoffed. "Unless you can tell Forehead Girl over here that I deserve Sasuke and not her!"

"No way! I deserve Sasuke!"

Naruto frowned at the dilemma a moment. Then he smiled. "Don't worry. You guys can stop fighting about it. Sasuke wouldn't want either of you. He's gay."

A pause. A twitch. An incredulous shout of, "WHAT!" from two people.

"Yep, yep." Naruto nodded in satisfaction. "Well, I'd better be going. I told Sasuke I'd be home a half hour ago. Bye." And he walked away with his shopping basket full of ramen, humming to himself.

Problem resolved.

Well, there you have it. The first of many drabbles like this. In each one, there will be some weird argument that these two have about Sasuke. I hope this wasn't too sucky to open up with. I liked it though, so I guess that's all that matters. I'll update as soon as I get a couple reviews. I've got a million of these scenarios. Ta.