Title: Wisps
Author: Ebony
Summary: Yagami Raito does not believe in ghosts. Sinners go to Hell. God is always right. A character study
Rating: T (since religion is brought into it, sort of)



Yagami Raito does not believe in ghosts.

Sometimes, he will think that he sees wisps of something darting in and out of his peripheral vision, something in the mirror behind him, dark and faint. Watching him. Shapes on his eyelids, afterthoughts. It's been happening more and more often lately.

He knows, though, he knows that there is nothing there (besides Ryuuku of course, because Ryuuku is always there). It's impossible and improbable. Besides, he has much more important things to worry about than things that don't even exist haunting the corners of his eyes.

He blames it on his lack of sleep as of late, and that is that.

Even so, it has begun to plague his mind lately, and he curses himself for it. His hands will shake a little when writing (but just a little). His eyes will flicker rapidly around a room, checking for shadows that aren't there. He's beginning to wonder, and he's beginning to get a little bit more paranoid, a little more careful, a little more unsure…

Maybe, whispers something in his mind one night (morning, really; the clock sitting on his desk reads 3:23 am and 50 seconds) when he can't sleep at all, Maybe they are ghosts. Maybe I'm wrong.

"I'm not wrong," he says loudly, fingers gripping the pillow so tightly his knuckles seem like mountains rising from his hands.

Ryuuku, who had been lingering by the desk across the room, gives him a look. Raito rolls over and pretends to go back to sleep. And that is that.

He is not wrong. How could be wrong? He is Yagami Raito, and he is brilliant; he has the highest marks in all of his classes, and he is a saviour. He is ridding the world of evil. With the powers of a Death God, yes, but Death Gods and ghosts are very different things, and the existence of one does not prove the existence of the other. Not at all.


In an offbeat conversation, L (or Ryuuzaki or whatever) once mentioned that he believed in ghosts. Raito raised an eyebrow, and stated quite plainly he didn't. L had smiled then, in that childish way he did (that smile, that often lingered in Raito's mind's eye quite clearly), and said nothing more. Not verbally, anyways.

Yagami Raito does not believe in ghosts.

He also believed that he was right. He believed he was saving the world. The people he killed deserved to die. They had sinned; did God not say all sinners would go to Hell?

'Yes, that's right… sinners go to Hell…'

Sinners do not stay around to haunt those who pass judgement on them. Sinners are wrong. Sinners deserve to die…

Raito's feet were cold; he pulled his legs up, closer to his flesh-blood-bone (mortal and human) body beneath the sheets. It was 2:40 and five seconds, and he had a class in eight hours. A shiver ran all the way through him, thoughts in his mind whirling on and on, rapidly. He kept his eyes closed, but sleep was far from near to him with all those flashes and words and hairline fractures of doubt slowly creeping into his mind, those pictures and words and faces…

(L raised an eyebrow, dropping another sugar cube into his tea. It dissolved quickly, but the particles were still visible floating in the liquid. His spoon clinked against the side as he stirred (with a flesh-bone-blood mortal hand, just the same as Raito), then looked up at the man beside him and smiled.

"Is that so, Raito-kun?")

God is never wrong.

Sinners go to Hell.

Yagami Raito does not believe in ghosts…


(notes: My first Death Note fic! If there is anything in here that contradicts the series, I apologize, I'm only on chapter 35 or so. Shameless amounts of symbolism was slipped in, as usual. Review are always appreciated. Thanks so much for reading!

- Ebony)