--- Disclaimer: I sadly don't own anything or this would be how the movie ended. ---

--- Summary: Ennis recalls how he found Jack almost dead, they share a few special moments together and Jack makes some realizations of his own about his lover.

--- Also, if you've already read this chapter but got an email saying it was changed, all I did was break up the big text blocks so don't worry, nothing actually changed ---

Tell Me How Much You Love Me

It was early morning when Ennis Del Mar opened his hazel eyes sleepily and smiled at the scene in front of him. Staring at his lover lying peacefully curled in his arms brought back rushes of memories that now seemed so far distant from where they were now. It had been almost a year now since he had received the postcard from Jack that was stamped with big red letters reading 'Deceased'. Immediately he had called Jack's wife Laureen to find out what had happened but as he listened to her story with tears of anger and grief building in his eyes, he hadn't believed a word coming out of her. "The tire blew up..." She had said. "The rim hit him in the face and he drowned in his own blood..." No. Jack was smarter then that. He wouldn't blow up a tire past its limits and Ennis knew that. Instead of saying that to Laureen however, he'd simply thanked her for telling him and hung up his phone, immediately packing up what little he had and abandoning his trailer to head to Texas where Jack had lived.

The journey had been horrible due to weather and the crappiness of the truck in general but it had been well worth it because after a whole day of searching he'd found his love lying practically dead by the side of a rarely used dirt road, his face bloody and his lean body mangled and bruised. Fearing the worst, he had jumped from his truck and cradled the man in his arms, thanking whatever god would listen that Jack was still alive. After a few moments of much needed relief, he'd carried the unconscious man to his truck and set him gingerly into the seat, wrapping him in a coat so the bumpy road wouldn't hurt him any further. From there he'd driven straight through the night, not bothering even to sleep and traveled all the way up to Brokeback Mountain where he'd picked the lock on the cabin and gone inside to lay Jack on the bed.

For two days straight he'd kept watch over him, barely even daring to sleep out of fear he would suddenly die on him but the third day proved a miracle as Jack opened his hazy blue eyes and squinted into the sunlight.

"E...Ennis..."

He'd muttered and Ennis had all but run to his side.

"I'm here rodeo... I'm here. Jus' be still now... I don' wan' you hurtin' yourself mor'n you already are..."

He remembered whispering that to him as he stared down at him, barely able to watch as his love had shifted to get more comfortable and looked up at him as if he was going to cry in pain. He'd shushed him quietly, fighting to keep his voice from cracking as he placed a cold rag over Jack's eyes and diverted his eyes to check over his injuries again. The many cuts and bruises covering his body were healing nicely and he'd found no broken bones when he'd checked him earlier, causing him to once again thank any listening god for sparing the life of the one he had pulled so close to his heart...

A small movement next to him brought Ennis out of his daydream and he smiled at the man next to him again, watching as he opened his eyes a little, still half asleep.

"Wha time izit..?"

He asked and Ennis reached over to brush a strand of hair out of his face.

"It's still early baby... You can go back to sleep."

"But I wanna stay up w'you..."

Jack whined out a little and cuddled against the warm frame of Ennis, nuzzling his face against his chest. Ennis just smiled again, a smile he saved only for Jack, though the other never knew that. Usually if he ever smiled around anyone it was just a small, lopsided half smile if anything at all. With Jack though, he found he couldn't suppress the genuine smile that broke out on his face so often his face almost hurt.

"A'right love... You c'n stay up if you wan'..."

He said quietly as he wrapped his arms protectively around him and laid his chin down gently on Jack's head, closing his eyes as he breathed in the sweet scent of his lover. Noticing the silence from the other after awhile, Jack looked up at him, his eyes now fully awake and curious.

"You a'right cowboy?"

He asked and Ennis opened his eyes, blushing slightly at being caught.

"Yeah... yeah I'm fine rodeo..."

He said and shifted to lie on his back, pulling Jack over to lie on his chest.

"Jus' thinkin' bout how much I..."

The sound of his voice trailed off slowly, unable to finish the thought. Jack looked up at him from his laying spot and tilted his head slightly.

"How much you what?"

He asked and Ennis smiled softly.

"Just how much I... I love you rodeo..."

At the sound of this simple sentence, Jack gasped softly and stared at the other, causing Ennis to turn away slightly, blushing. Jack hadn't heard him say that barely at all in all the time he'd known him. Maybe one or two times around when they were or had been making love but never just... Randomly like that...

"You... you mean that Ennis...?"

He asked and Ennis turned back to him, his eyes nothing but seriousness.

"O'course I mean it Jack... Why else would I say it? I know I don' say it much but... You should know tha' you mean ev'rything to me... I don' know what I'd do withou' you..."

He said as he stared him deep in the eyes then reached up to wrap his arms around his head, pulling him towards him and capturing his lips in a deep kiss before Jack could protest. He held him there till he felt the other relax against him before he let go of him, knowing he'd stay and trailed his hands down his back to hold him down as he pressed his desire up against his lover gently. Also during this he slid his tongue quickly into Jack's mouth and, meeting no resistance, began to slowly lick the inside of his mouth, savoring the sweet tobacco taste of him and the loud moans that the kiss drew from the other.

He began to moan softly as well as he felt Jacks desire growing hard against him and pushed up against him, grunting softly and backing away from the kiss for a split second to roll over, placing Jack underneath him before he continued his assault on his mouth. Jack, during this, had continued to moan out loudly, loving every second of attention he received from Ennis as he returned the passionate kiss with fervor. Feeling both himself and his lover becoming quickly excited, he trailed his hands down quickly and stripped them both of their pajama pants, tossing them off the bed where they lay on the floor in a crumpled mess.

Ennis moaned his lovers name loudly as he felt him arch up against him, knowing he wanted it as badly as he himself did. Grabbing a bottle of oil off the nearby nightstand, he quickly slathered himself and the other, receiving more pleasurable moans from Jack and causing Ennis to become even harder, if possible. Unable to resist any longer, he wrapped an arm around Jack's back and pulled him up against him as he pressed into him, stifling his deep moan with a kiss so passionate it left them both breathless. Jack fell quickly into his loves pattern of thrusts and kisses, completely lost in his own world as the other slammed down into him, nipping and sucking at whatever bare skin he came across. He realized after a few minutes that, even though he was dazed out by now, Ennis seemed to be doing him... Better... More passionately now then he usually did. Upon realizing this, he pulled himself out of his daze long enough to grab Ennis's face and pull him into a deep french kiss, whispering the three words Ennis loved before letting himself float back into pleasure as his lover whispered them back to him just as softly...

"...I love you too rodeo..."

--- Well, that's it for Chapter 1. Please R&R and tell me how you like it. I'm only gonna continue if people like it so yeah... Please be honest. Thanks for reading! ---