Buffy stood on the corner of 21st and California Street in her pink halter top and denim skirt. She was trying her best to look sexy and innocent with a lit cigarette in her mouth. She put her fingers to the filter and took a long drag, sucking in as much of the robust flavor as she could handle before flicking the burning cigarette to pavement and crushing it beneath her pink stilettos. A warm LA night breeze swished through her honey colored hair, making it tangle on her leather choker. As she reached to untie her hair as a recently washed silver car parked in front of her position on the sidewalk.
'Mercedes' she thought 'Nice' She sidle her way to the car, putting on her pouty face as the window rolled down. She squatted and leaned in so that her elbows were positioned on top of the glass, so he would be unable to roll it back up.
"Hi" the man said amiably. He was wearing a black business suit, complete with silver cufflinks. His hair was dark brown with a small amount of expense gel to give it hold. The interior of his car was complete leather and spotless. There was a folder filled with documents of varying color all neatly organized with tabs sticking from the top laying on his passenger seat. He seemed a bit, over wound, but who was she to judge?
"Hi, Sweetheart" she said curling her glossed lips into a seductive smirk. "You looking for a date?"
"No," he said his voice changing to deeper, more menacing sound. "Actually I was just looking for directions to El Camino."
His voice kind of scared her. She'd had some bad experiences with tricks getting too rough. 'Maybe I should back off' she thought 'Then again it is almost 11 and I need someone to pay for a hotel room for the night' She reached her pale hand into the car and caressed the buttons of his navy shirt while gleefully noticing it was real silk.
"Oh come one Sweetheart." she said warmly "You look like you could use a good time." she moved her hand, now rubbing his belly button "Maybe unwind, hmm?" He grabbed her wrist in painful grip. She tried to pull free but he held tight. Her eyes went wide in terror. 'Not another loony' she thought. 'Please not another one'
"I don't need a fucking hand job from some common street whore, understand?" He clenched harder as he spoke, his class ring causing a red indentation to form. She nodded readily, anything to make him let go. She had already had that wrist broken and knew all it would take was a quick flick for it snap. "Do I like common trash to you? I am not. I am above you, bitch." he pushed her away roughly and she landed in a puddle on her backside. She had torn the skin on her palms and thighs in the fall. "Here." He threw a few bills out the window at her and drove away without a look back.
She dragged herself into standing position and as much as it stung at her new wounds and pride she leaned down to gather the scattered, wet bills. She counted it to only find twenty-five dollars. 'Fucking cheapskate' she mused. She tucked the soggy currency in her bra and began walking towards the park. Maybe she could find a bench or something.
It wasn't always like this. Living from her purse and waiting for someone else to pay for her and her bed. She remembered being held in her father's lap or sitting on the floor as he played chords on his guitar. She remembered the smell of chocolate chip cookies wafting from the kitchen of their Sunnydale home and huge overstuffed couch with warm wool blankets strewn over the back. So what happen? 'He fucking died, that's what'
After her father's death when she was ten her mother had gone deeper inside herself, drinking over lost love and forgetting her young daughter. The house and yard were neglected and there was barely ever food in the cabinets. Buffy took on the role of matriarch, cleaning and cooking for herself, and her mother, though she barely ate. Her mother stopped going to work and lived mainly off of savings and the life insurance settlement. Everyday coming home was nightmare to Buffy, she didn't know if her mother would be awake, slurring curses and swaying to an imaginary beat or passed out on the couch, with nothing to rouse her, not even a brutal slap from her prepubescent child.
The summer before her Freshman year Buffy reached puberty. Her breasts were swollen and new and between her legs blood leaked onto her Hello Kitty panties. She was so scared. She tried to talk to her mother but found her passed out on the couch. She felt stupid and tried to remember the things they had taught her seventh grade sex ed. She stared at the array of feminine products and then at the dollar fifteen in her hand. She quickly grabbed a small, squishy item with the words "Always Ultra-Dry" on the front and pushed it into pocket of her hoody. She tried her best to be cool and collected as she walked to the automatic doors, but on the inside she was shaking like an earthquake. She was relieved beyond imagining when she had made it onto the street where she lived, still convinced someone was going to jump out of the Juniper bushes screaming "Thief!".
Freshman year she found uses for her new found cleavage. Most boys were enthralled with her breasts and made no stop of showing their appreciation. She could have her lunch free and most of the time, her dinner too. They may not of been as big as The Great Cordelia Chase's but they got her what she needed. After some time at this she had found one boy that she actually enjoyed his company. Parker. He was a sweet, sensitive Senior and always took her where she wanted. After a few weeks of dating him he had parked them at Lover's Lane and she was ready for a some awkward yet enjoyable necking. She turned to him, with a sweet smile expecting a peck and coming across something much different. Parker had unzipped his pants and pulled his hardened penis out.
"Parker!" she had screeched, scrunching herself as far away as possible.
"Oh come on. You can't tell me you of all people have never seen one of these before." He said rolling his eyes. The truth was, she hadn't. She had never even been past first base before. She would admit that the sight of him hard and ready did get her a little excited, but as cliché as it sounded she wanted to build a mental relationship before starting a physical one.
"I wanna go home." she had stated firmly while neither confirming nor negating the previous statement. I mean no one wants to be seen as a prude in high school, no matter how true it might be.
"I've shelled out at least two hundred dollars on you and all I have to show for it are a few chaste kisses." he said growing angrier by the second. "You are the one who wanted to date and this is a part of dating. It is only fair for all the money I have spent on you."
Buffy was frightened now, there was a strange glint in Parker's eye. Evil has an essence, a radiation and she could feel it coming from him and hitting her in waves. His hate and need beating against her like rocks on a shore. She tried her best to level with him
"Listen. I'll let you get to second base. I know you have been begging for it. I..I just don't think I am ready for that" she said with a slight nod in the direction of his erection. Her heart was beating fast and her head had begun to hurt, but she would let him touch her breasts if it would appease him and make him put that… that thing away.
"Oh I think you are." he said with a grin. Without warning his cold fingers were tangled in her curls so he had a strong grip on her head. She tried to claw at his hand but he whipped her head around until it smacked against the glass of the window. She watched as little bits of yellow, black and orange raced across her vision and she was suddenly extremely compliant. He moved her head so she was face to face with his penis she could feel her breath hit it and bounce back. "Just pretend it's a candy cane" he said with a laugh that made her shiver.
When he dropped her off at home, she remembered everything. Her skin was crawling and itching across her petite frame. His sweaty smell was etched into her nostrils. She could still feel the heat of him bouncing against her tonsils. She kneeled and vomited in the bushes by her doorstep. The stomach acid burned at her already sore throat and little trails of bile fell out her nasal cavities as she retched. She felt dirty and wrong. She walked in pulling her coat as tight to her body as possible. She found her mother passed out on the stairs, a bottle of vodka had fallen from her hands and had spilled soaking into the carpets and wood leaving the entire house smelling like alcohol. She would have to clean all the floors tomorrow. She stepped over her mother and walked to the bathroom and began scrubbing at her mouth with her toothbrush until blood filled the sink when she spat.
She was still unclean.
She left town after the next day, determined to make it in the big city. Become an actress, or singer or some other famous being. She had watched E True Hollywood Story, most had similar back stories to hers. Why couldn't she be a big shot? Simple, she didn't have money for anything. She walked one day into an agency, announcing herself as the next big thing to the secretary who asked for her headshot and then promptly and primly asked her to leave. She had nowhere to go, home wasn't an option and LA seemed to offer no alternative. She started small, rubbing or sucking those who paid to orgasm. After a while a frequent customer wanted more. She sold her virginity for two hundred and seventy five dollars and with the cash bought herself her first silk shirt which was later ripped in half by a drunk client. So here she was barely eighteen and stuck in the ritual of sucking, touching, fisting, rubbing and fucking for as much money as she could get.
She stumbled into the park, her heels catching on the cobblestone path. Flowing notes enveloped her as she strolled. She looked in the direction of the music and noticed someone sitting under a lamppost clutching an acoustic guitar with a black case laying in front of him. She could tell he was tall despite the fact that he was hunched over his instrument. The song was soft and soothing, like something she had heard before, but she couldn't place it. It sounded like it was made just for her.
"Childhood living is easy to do,
The things you wanted I bought them for you,
Graceless Lady, You know who I am,
You know I can't let you slide through my hands,
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away,
Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away,"
She sat down near enough to him that she could listen but not so close that he could see her. She took him in. His hair was dark and styled as he wanted, but it wasn't a pretentious style like the prick in the Mercedes, it was cute and modest. He was wearing a black shirt and jeans, his shoes tapping the rhythm he played. He was pale, though lamp light softened it. The deep furrowed brow that sketched his face gave him the impression of a depressed, brooding man but Buffy saw it more of a look of concentration.
"I watched you suffer a dull aching pain,
Now you've decided to show me the same,
No sweeping exits or offstage lines
Can make me feel bitter or treat you unkind
Wild couldn't drag me away,
Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away"
She closed her eyes and let the music sift over her overworked mind and body. The man's voice clasping around her like one of the warm blankets that lay on the back of the couch of her Sunnydale home. She hadn't felt this good in a long time and she wanted it all to last forever. To bask in his lyrics and chords until she died, because then, at least she would die happy. But like all things in Buffy's life, things didn't go the way she wanted and she clung securely to the feeling as the final chorus was played.
"I know I dreamed you a sin and a lie,
I have my freedom but I don't have much time,
Faith has been broken, tears must be cried,
Let's do some living after we die,
Wild Horses couldn't drag me away,
Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday"
The song ended and the clicks of closing guitar case echoed through the empty park. She felt like crying and she noticed idly that she was trembling. Why did all this have to happen? She had been good. Always did her homework, respected elders, she even fed her goddamn goldfish daily, and she still had messed up her life beyond salvation. She was broken, rotten, filth, defective. She was …
"Are you all right?"
She lifted her face to meet the face of the musician. He was even more handsome up close. His chin was chiseled and clean shaven and his lips were a pale pink in the moonlight. His concentrated brooding expression was replaced with one of concern.
"I'm fine" she said quickly pushing herself up from her position. Her eyes came up to his chest so she had to strain her neck to see his eyes. They were a melted chocolate brown. So deep and dark that Buffy had to look away before losing herself in them.
"Really?" he asked lifting his right hand and thumbing away a tear from her cheek. She had started crying without knowing. "Don't worry I will take it as compliment, rather than a hint that my abominable playing brought you to tears" He smiled and she smiled back at him with a small, weak grin.
"No. Just, stuff. You know?" she knew he didn't know or care for that matter, but she couldn't help trying to explain herself.
"God. I hate stuff!" he quoted overdramatically, throwing back his head for emphasis. She let loose a small giggle and her grin grew. "I'm Liam."
"Angie" she lied. She had yet to tell anyone her real name since moving to Los Angeles, why start now?
"Well, Angie. How about I walk you home?" the smile was still on his face. She kind of hated him for always having it.
"I…I'll be alright" she stammered looking at her feet while playing with her hands.
"Now, what kind of a gentleman would I be if I didn't walk you home?" he asked with a teasing smirk. She wanted to flirt and answer 'a bad one' but she didn't want to encourage him.
"I gotta go" she said and turned into the park, walking away from his sturdy form. She wrapped her arms around herself, steeling herself from him and anyone else.
"Hey!" he bellowed. When it didn't work he jogged up to her. "The exit of the park is that way," he pointed behind them "this way and you will just get stuck in here overnight" she said nothing and continued walking, he grabbed her shoulder to stop her. "Don't you want to head home?"
"This is my home." she uttered quietly, but filled with caution.
"Oh" he said. She nodded and moved on. She thought she had lost him when once again he was at her side. "You can come home with me tonight, I mean if you want to"
She sighed. What could she do? She needed a shower and she had already been jumped a few times in this park while sleeping. She looked up at him, into his dark eyes. 'Damn those eyes!' she thought.
"Alright" she said and began to follow him.
You know what you should do now? You should totally review this. Especially if you liked it. 3s