Detour (or The Long Awaited Sequel to True Happiness)


Spoilers: Anything's possible through 7th season eps and, naturally, True Happiness. Some of this won't make sense if you haven't read that, but most of it probably will.

Disclaimer: I don't own them; I'm just taking them out for some fun. I'll put them back when I'm done. Promise.

AN: Takes place somewhere in season 7, but not particularly anywhere. SJ… always


The phone in Samantha Carter's lab rang just as she was heading out. She'd only meant to stop in for a moment, long enough to make sure nothing was left out that could possibly go bad while she was having lunch or disappearing inexplicably after lunch. Colonel O'Neill was waiting for her in the mess and she didn't want to keep him waiting. She sighed as she made her way back to her desk, laughing to herself at her own stupidity – of course he wouldn't wait on her if there was food in front of him. The man did have priorities.

She lifted the phone to her ear and prayed that there wouldn't be a crisis unfolding on the other end when she identified herself. "Carter."

"It's Taco day."

His words made her smile, making her feel a little better that he couldn't wait five minutes for her to return and had to call her in the meantime. "Yes, sir, it's Wednesday. There are always tacos on Wednesdays."

"I love Wednesdays." He sounded truly pleased.

She was still smiling into the phone like an idiot. "Yes, sir, I'm starting to feel a certain affection for them as well." He was quiet after she spoke and she feared for a moment that her allusion to what had just transpired between them was too forward. She blushed deeply, something she'd been doing far too often anymore.

But she could hear the smile in his voice. "I can understand that. Could you do me a favor and grab my hot sauce? You know the mess doesn't have anything resembling hot sauce."

"Actually, sir, they do. It's the red stuff in those little bottles that are labeled 'hot sauce.'" She couldn't help being flippant. She was just in too good a mood.


"Yes, sir, I'll get it." She knew the colonel preferred his hot sauce unbearably so and had only ever been satisfied by an odd substance Teal'c had found for him. The smell alone was enough to clear Carter's sinuses and she stayed far away from the stuff. But she knew that the colonel would not eat his tacos without it. And she wasn't quite able to deny him anything.

"Hurry up, Carter."

"I can't get it until I get off the phone, sir. I would, however, like to take this opportunity to point out that I seriously doubt you're going to starve before I get there."

"I'm not starving. I miss you." How could she resist that?

"I'll be right there, sir." She giggled as she hung up, practically skipping to the locker room and finding the two small vials in his jacket pocket. He carried that hot sauce with him everywhere he went and so it always had to be in his uniform. And apparently, she noted, he'd taken to carrying back up. She picked the fuller of the two jars and headed back to the elevators.

It was only a few minutes later that Carter about floated into the mess, sitting down at the table that had two trays on it. The colonel's face lit up when he saw her, but she realized his glee was directed at the substance in her hand and not necessarily at her. She shook her head as he snagged the bottle from her, carefully allowing a scant few drops to fall into his food.

She couldn't quite force back a grin as she feigned innocence. "You do realize that it will be several days before any woman in her right mind would kiss you after eating that stuff, right?"

He winked at her as he dug into his food. "Guess it's a good thing you're not exactly in your right mind then, huh?"

Stunned by his boldness, she felt her face color once again and she dropped her head, busying herself with applying her own mild sauce to her food. When she looked up again, Jack was once again putting the hot sauce on his lunch – liberally. He held it out to her.

"This doesn't seem that hot to me." He waved it under her nose, but she jerked out of the way.

Her eyes had already started to tear, just knowing it was in front of her. "Don't you dare. Keep that away from me."

She watched in horror as he stuck his finger directly into the small jar, then brought the finger to lips and licked it. But she got distracted at the sight of his tongue and as a result, it barely even registered that he was entirely disappointed by the taste. He dumped the bottle upside down and shrugged.

"Maybe the potency wears off after a little while."

Still transfixed by the workings of his mouth, a mouth she'd had the glorious privilege of tasting just a few minutes earlier, she only nodded in response. She seriously doubted the potency of that would ever quite wear off. Her eyes lifted to his across the table and found that his face was red too. She knew it had nothing to do with the food. She suspected it had something to do with the way his leg had wormed its way between hers and was pressing against her calf. It wasn't the most intimate contact in the world, but in the mess, in uniform, in front of witnesses, it was pretty damn forward.

Her face was still burning several minutes later when Daniel happened upon them.

"Hey, guys." He looked around suspiciously. "Am I interrupting something?"

Belatedly, Carter noticed that all heads in the mess had turned in their direction. "No, Daniel, not a thing." Certainly not lunch, she realized, because neither of them had managed to stop staring at one another long enough to take more than a bite, which might have explained the audience. She shifted her leg out of contact with Jack's and found that the temperature in the room dropped back to something resembling normal. "What's up?"

Daniel turned to Jack, who was practically shoveling food into his mouth since he was no longer distracted by Carter. Daniel grimaced at the image. "Jack, General Hammond asked if we still had that sample from 738."

He talked around the massive amount of food in his mouth. "What sample from where?"

"Jack, how often are you responsible for carrying the samples from anywhere?" Daniel's words reminded Jack immediately that there was only one thing he'd been carrying and that was because he'd been the one to obtain it.

"You mean Loh'ran's mini-me potion?"

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Yes, Jack, that sample."

"It's in my locker."

"Ok, I'll go get it." Daniel smiled at Carter. "I'll catch up with you later."

Jack stood up quickly, forgetting entirely about his food and his companion. "No way, Danny boy. God knows what'll happen if you get your hands on it."

He stopped before he took two steps and looked at Carter. "I'll see you later?"

Carter smiled. "Count on it, sir."

It never occurred to her, despite all the fuss when the colonel was unable to locate the sample, nor when, subsequently, everyone was unable to locate the colonel, that it had anything to do with the lack of flavor from Jack's precious hot sauce or that she'd grabbed the wrong bottle.

AN: Comments are greatly appreciated!