Phish Food belongs to good ol' Ben and Jerry. They know how to treat a lady.
I was fat. No, fat, was an understatement. I was a sea whale; a sea whale that could not see her feet. Which is sad because I could see them last week. I missed my feet. That moment of sadness was washed away with a spoonful of ice cream. Mmm, Phish food.
Here I was, world-famous actress/rock star, Jude Harrison-Quincy, mooning over the fact that I could not see my feet. I'm a sad, sad woman. I told myself. But then again, I was pregnant. Pregnancy was making me crazy. From inside my womb, I felt a kick. My babies didn't like me being I downer, I guess.
"Hey you, in there." I crooned through a mouthful of ice cream-y goodness, "Mama just misses her feet. It's not a big deal. No need to kick me."
I felt another kick.
"Now that was uncalled for." I said in the same sing-songy voice, "It's no fair when you two gang up on Mommy.
"Babe, are you talking to the babies again?" my husband's voice asked from behind me.
"Of course." I replied, scooting around to face him, "You weren't around, so I had to talk to someone."
He leaned down and kissed me on the lips, then with some tongue. When we broke apart, Tommy grinned.
"Mmm. You taste like chocolate…and marshmallows."
"Aren't I sweet?"
He chuckled. "Always. Come back to bed."
"One more bite."
"Y'know you could always take that upstairs…" he trailed off with a wink.
"Shadd uuup!" I cried, laughing.
I took one more bite and put the half-pint back in the freeze and the spoon in the sink. I turned to Tommy and smiled as I reached out my hand to him. He took my hand and we went upstairs.
I flopped down on to the bed because I couldn't get into it otherwise, being a sea whale and all. I was 27 weeks pregnant…only…roughly…13 more weeks to go! Hoorah! Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Tommy smiling.
"Are you laughing at the mother of your twins?" I demanded with a raised eyebrow.
"No. I'm just happy." He leaned over and kissed my belly through my AC/DC t-shirt.
I smiled and touched his head. He looked up at me and looked puzzled. I puckered my lips at him and he laughed. Tommy raised himself up and kissed me on the lips passionately. When we broke apart, he spoke against my lips.
"Were you feeling left out?"
He kissed me again in response. Mmm. I could do this forever. But unfortunately, one of the twins were pushing against my bladder and I had to pee like mad. I broke away from Tommy, gave him a small smile, then wiggled and pushed my way off the bed and hurried into the bathroom. I could hear Tommy laughing as I did my business.
"Shud uuppp!" I yelled.