Well there you are. One more oneshot GaaLee fic to add to the pile. Once again I should say that this has not been edited or even spell checked, so please excuse mistakes.


Water Logic


First Date


Gaara was begining to believe that he hated Konohagure. It probably wasn't the best thing to say out loud, but ever since he had arrived in the leaf village he had felt an immense distaste for both the area and the populus.

It might have been the wetness that Gaara loathed. The people of Konoha used water like a cheap whore. They flushd it down toilets, threw it in the streets, used buckets of it to bathe themselves and thier dogs. Rain fell uncollected in to the gutter and was washed away unused. People in Sunagakure knew how to treat water. Dogs in Sunagakure did not bathe.

Maybe that was why Gaara had called a recess in his meetings with the Hokage. Seeing that woman, who he only grudgingly viewed as an equal, down half a pitcher of water over the course of thier discussions had made him more than a little cranky. Even Gaara knew that cranky could become murderous given the right insentive.

He may have been new to diplomacy, but Gaara was pretty sure that 'short recessess' were not supposed to be more than an hour long. At the same time, he knew that if he didn't wan't to go back he wasn't going to. He had spent the last thirty minutes carefully massacring a colony of ants in the park. It was fun. Gaara almost smiled.

He was distracted slightly when he felt the force of something hitting his Sand from above. It was a vaugly familiar feeling, a slight pressure instead of the satysfying pull of something being caught and dismembered. Gaara looked up, and then behind himself. Too see a familiar black-haired leaf-nin sprawled on his back in the grass.

"Gaara!" the leaf-nin cried, jumping to his feet and grining like a madman, Gaara breifly wondered why the sand hadn't maimed him yet.

In response, Gaara grunted, both to cover the fact that he couldn't remember the leaf-nin's name and to express his wish to be left alone. He considered turning back to the enteraining ants, but the leaf-nin obviously wanted something and some memory told Gaara that he wouldn't stop until he got it.

That slight twinge of memory brought Gaara back to wondering who the strange nin was. He was certainly familiar, although Gaara was pretty sure that he hadn't killed him yet. The green jump suit streached tightly over well-developped mustles, reavealing the lines in his arms, abdomin, and... Gaara was pretty sure that everyone in Sunagakure wore underwear, apparently this was not true of Konoha.

"Do I know you?" Gaara demanded finally, when he realized he had been staring at certain bulges in the nin's outfit for longer than necessary.

Gaara was pretty clueless when it came to speaking with other people, but he knew that it was considered rude when you didn't remeber someone. Temari had reminded him of this social rule the day before, when he had unknowingly forgotten the exstance of the Hokage's secretary only a few moments after they had been introduced. However, the nin-in-the-tight-jumpsuit simply grinned wider and responded with an exuberant "hai!".

"Oh." That was good to know, Gaara thought.

"I'm Rock Lee. We fought during the Chunin exam." The nin said, "I almost died." This was followed by another grin and a stragely hypnotic laugh. Gaara briefly wondered if the nin was insane. Gaara turned back to the ants.

"Do you want to go for ramen?" Lee asked from behind him, destracting him once more from his genocide.


"Do you want to go get ramen with me?" Lee said again, not slower or louder like many nin tented to do when he asked for a repetition. Gaara once again turned from the ants to look Rock Lee in the face, but he was thwarted by the Bulge, which drew his attention like a magnet.

"Didn't I try to kill you?" He asked the Bulge.

"Hai!" It replied. A moment of silence followed by a questioning noise from the direction of the Bulge.

Finally Gaara felt like it was time to shut the strange Bul- nin down. Using skills he had gained years earlier, Gaara excersized his amazing powers of diflection to make the annoying thing go away.

" I don't like you." He told it.

"Lots of people don't like me" Lee replied, although Gaara had yet to look at his face, "That shouldn't stop you from enjoying Delicious Free Noodles."

Gaara wondered if maybe Lee's logic should make less sense, but he was bored and the bulging nin was offering him ramen. Everyone like ramen, even Gaara. He nodded and stood, brushing the dirt and dead ants from his clothes and lifting his gourd onto his shoulder. Now that he was standing it was easier to ignore the Bulge, since he was at eye level with Lee. The nin grinned once more before taking Gaara by the hand and leading him out of the park.

Gaara didn't even notice that Lee had touched him until they had reached the small ramen stall and he was released. He might have spent more time thinking over the failure of his Ultimate Defense but Lee was ordering and the nice stall man was bringing them ramen. If there was anything that justified Kohona's distressing waste of water it was the ramen. You couldn't get ramen in Sunagakure unless it was a festival day. Mostly the food in the Sand village could be prepared with little or no water, which ment no soup, which meant no ramen.

Gaara considered the possibility of importing water specifically for the purpose of More ramen in Sunagakure. Maybe he could make a law...

He was quickly distracted from his thoughts by Lee's chattering, and Gaara soon found himself actually paying attention. It was easier to listen to the exuberant nin now that the Bulge was safely hidden under the table, and Gaara found himself almost entertained by Lee's conversation. Certainly the nin made sense, more sense than most people.

It was over an hour before Gaara realized that he had finished his ramen, and that he was in an involved convorsation over the benifits of pit traps vs. Things Falling on Your Enemy's Head. Lee had pulled a piece of charcoal from his pocket and was drawing on the counter top. Gaara's leg had somehow managed to get iteslef pressed up agains't Lee's knees without his knowledge, and every now and then Lee found himself laying a hand on Gaara's shoulder. The Defense stayed in it's gourd, although Gaara probably wouldn't have noticed if the gourd itself got up and did a cancan dance.

Both nin were compleatly engrossed in each other, right up until Gaara's sister brought her hand down on the table in front of them. The Sand reacted, pushing her hand away automatically. Gaara and Lee looked up for a moment, Lee greeting her with a cheerfull "Good evening!". Temari opened her mouth, most likely to yell, but was interrupted as Gaara turned back to Lee as if she didn't exsist.

"You can't waste that much water in the desert. " He said, one of the longest sentances Temari had ever heard come from his mouth.

"You could always pour boiling oil on them." Lee responded brightly.

Gaara smiled, a frightening thing for almost everyone present, "I like oil."

"Hey!" Temari shouted.

She was greeted with equally annoyed looks from both boys. "You've been missing for over two hours." She told her younger brother, ignoring his companion completly.

"Theres a lot of oil in the desert." Lee said, Gaara nodded.

"Dammit Gaara!" Temari shouted. Gaara glared in response but stood, knowing his short break was over.

"I have to go." He told Lee, "I'm the Kazekage now, you know."

"Really? Thats great!" Lee gave him the good-guy-grin once again, he had told Gaara that every one of his smiles had a title, and gave the Kazekage a thumbs up.

"Come by tomorrow, we can have okonomiyaki!" Lee said, standing. Once again Gaara's eyes were caught by the Bulge. He gave a slight nod, not even winceing at Lee's ear splitting "YOSH!", and followed Temari back to the Hokage's office and more stifling talks.

He gave Lee, and the Bulge, a soft goodbye. Konoha really wasn't that bad when you got used to it. He certainly would be spending more time in the leaf village from now on.

Briefly, Gaara wondered if he could teach them how to take care of thier water.