Disclaimer: Not owning. Joy.
La. Here's the sequel bout Foaly and Root. I hope you people find it as funny or more as the first one.
Switched: Part 2
Root promptly raised a hairy palm to slap the offending mirror…
…and fell over backwards. "Stupid four legs…" he muttered to himself.
Unfortunately the cursing and banging in the bathroom didn't go unnoticed. Within moments what looked like a whole Retrieval team crowded through the doorway, all pushing to get a better view.
"Foaly?" Trouble Kelp said, peering embarrassedly at the figure sprawled before him on the floor. "You okay?"
"I'm fine, Kelp," Root grunted. He was still for a second, then barked, "Well? Why aren't any of you offering to help me up?"
Trouble blushed a little and stuck out his hand. Accepting it, Root pulled himself up to his new four legs. He swayed a bit and grabbed onto the edge of the sink to prevent himself from tipping over.
"There's one thing I want to ask you, Captain…"
"Why do you call me Foaly?"
Trouble stared at the centaur before him, thinking he had gone mad. What is happening these days? First Holly punches me, then Foaly's asking why I call him by name… "Well, I was assuming you were Foaly. What should I call you then? Cindy?"
Root raised an eyebrow. "That was really bad, Kelp."
"Sorry." But this had confirmed what Root thought.
Somehow, I'm in Foaly's body… so who's in my body? As realization struck him, he made to move.
"Before you go, Foaly, I was wondering…"
"What 'blasted centaur' were you, er- screaming about?"
"Oh." said Root. "Oh. I…was just talking about my friend Bob. He, uh…hurt my pet bunny." Root felt a rush of anger fill him, thinking of his own bunny. Anyone who hurts my Sugarpuff…
Trouble nodded slowly as murmurs escalated around him from the Retrieval squad. "Uh-huh."
"Well, I have to go now." Root took a step forward only to realize yet again that he didn't know how to walk with four legs. Shoot, he thought as he toppled over right into Trouble, effectively knocking over everyone else as well.
"Woah," was Foaly's first reaction. He had landed smack dab in a comfortable spinny chair with his feet prepped up on a table. Clutched in his hand was an icy Diet Coke. "Did I just fall into heaven or is this Beetroot's office?"
It certainly appeared to be. Setting down his Coke, he looked around him. He was in a lounge, complete with vending machines and plasma TV. Well, really it was Root's meeting room. But to Foaly's 'overworked and underpaid' mind, it was a lounge.
Foaly noticed a mess of stuff on the table. "Bah, paperwork. Who needs it?" He brushed the papers and pens off the table. It was then he observed the skin tone of his fingers, hand, and arm. And it was then he saw the number of feet propped on the table.
Eyes bulging, Foaly noticed an acrid taste in his mouth. Pulling it out with two fingers, he discovered none other than a fungus cigar.
"Wh-What the…?" Foaly got up and out of the chair and promptly fell on his face.
"Owww…" Foaly got up and held to the edge of the table for support. He had two legs, no tail, and a badge on his LEP uniform that said 'Commander Root'.
For a technical genius, Foaly was rather slow to realize what had happened. But then again, he didn't have a mirror in front of him when he first arrived in this dilemma. However, he was better with the foot situation than Root. He stomped over to the door and slammed it shut. Then he marched over to the very center of the room and screamed at the top of his lungs.
"Aaaaaaaaeeeeeeeecoughacoughacoughhack-hack-hack!" Foaly broke out in a coughing fit, having accidentally swallowed some of the residue smoke from the fungus cigar.
Drama over, it was time for a new approach. Clearing his throat, Foaly decided to 'explore', that is, attempt to find Root's main office. But when he did, he discovered he had a visitor. One who just happened to have four legs, a tail, and a bottle of hoof moisturizer in one hairy hand.
"M-May I help you?" The person who appeared to be his mirror image (of course, meaning back when he was known as the grumpiest commander of all) fidgeted.
"Hello, Commander." Root stepped forward and caught his balance before he could fall sideways again. Still not stable with the legs…
"Hello, Foaly." Two can play at this game, Foaly thought.
Root felt a rush of adrenaline, though for once he did not feel his cheeks coloring. "There's no point beating around the bush, you know…"
"I was about to say the same to you, actually."
"Sooo….." Root maneuvered his hooved feet to get closer to Foaly in order to, well, yell in his face. "WHY DID YOU POISON ME WITH YOUR STUPID CONCOCTION?"
Foaly gasped like a girl as his face turned red. "How DARE you ask me!"
"And what do you mean by that, Foaly?" Suddenly Root felt a little embarrassed. What if the person he was talking to wasn't Foaly? Then he would be in a hole…
But it was proved to be Foaly in his next two sentences. "I mean exactly what I said, Julius! And what did you do with my tinfoil hat?"
"I left the bloody thing right where it belongs! In the trash!" Well, actually it had slipped off when he had fallen. But who care? Not him. "AND DON'T CALL ME JULIUS!"
"Why-you-" Foaly struggled to catch his breath. "First you somehow switch our bodies, then you throw away my tinfoil hat, and now you're pretending you don't know anything about it?"
"Funny there, Foaly. You stole the words from my mouth. Without the hat part, though." Root said. "Anyway, I thought you had tons of them."
"I do. But that's not the point."
"For the first time in your life, you're right. The point is that you have trapped me in your body and you are going to get us back in our respective places so I can fire you!"
"You can't do that, Julius."
"And why the hell not, pony?" Root was so mad at this point he didn't notice the use of his first name.
"One, I'm irreplaceable." There was a signature smirk on Foaly's mouth. "Two, I'm in charge now." He pointed to the badge on his chest. "So don't you talk to your commander like that or he might give you a spanking."
"Is that so?" Root's face had a dangerous look. The one all fairies get when they have been pushed too far. "Now tell me this, centaur. What do you think would happen if I just handed in a resignation letter to the Council?'
For the first time, Foaly looked nervous. "You can't do that. You need me too much."
"I need you like I need more inexperienced interns under my belt!"
"Hey wise guy, did the possibility that neither of us did anything to get this way ever occur to you?"
"Don't speak to me like that."
"Why? You're just a lowly centaur, right?" Foaly crossed his arms and pouted. It was an odd look for the commander.
"No, I'm your commander. And how likely is your little theory anyway?"
"All I'm saying is that I didn't do anything to make us get this way, and you have no proof that I did this anyway."
"So say the guilty…" Root muttered under his breath.
"If you did this, it's your job to get us out of it. I'm not doing it."
"Fine! But remember, if you did Foaly, you are going to wish you were never born!" With that, Julius Root stomped out of his own office.
He didn't notice a certain female Recon officer hiding behind the doors with a huge grin on her face who had just taped the entire fight and was now heading towards her cubicle to share it with a certain Irish Mud Boy.
A bit shorter than usual, but my first chapters usually are. Tell me if you like it so far. It's a bit fast paced, unfortunately. But here it is.